Chapter Text
Sae and Ryusei had found that they were on the same page with most things, another one being nationals. Ryusei was so overly confident that she knew what the outcome would be, and although Sae was quieter about it, less grinning and cackling, not wanting to jinx anything or else give herself a panic attack, she knew what the outcome would be too.
And how could she not be?
She’d not only trained her team to the fucking bone, until they were sore, crying, throwing up, but she’d researched the other teams that had qualified for nationals. She’d found their team lists, stalked their social media pages, looked at their past routines, wore hats and ditched her unsubtle girlfriend to stake them out. Desperate? Maybe. But when Sae wanted something, the lengths that she would go to were nothing short of insane.
The date was something she mostly tried to forget about. To keep out of her mind. It didn’t exist if she didn’t let it, that living threat. It was something she kept separate from nationals. Something she could deal with, possibly talk her way out of, after they won.
She woke the morning of nationals feeling calm. Which was a little shocking, seeing as she hadn’t gotten the seven and a half hours she’d allotted herself, more like three or four, because Ryusei had off handedly mentioned to her that it would probably be easier if she slept over at her house the night before so she could wake her up and they could get ready together and Sae had thought it made enough sense and was delusional enough to think they’d actually sleep.
Which they had not.
Rin had been, predictably, annoyed to share their shared bathroom with the two of them. But less so than Sae would have thought. Which was explained by the fact that when she left, after subjecting them to no less than a thousand eye rolls, Sae and Ryusei heard whispering behind the door to her bedroom.
“Are they still in there?” someone whispered. Sae thought the voice might be familiar, but she couldn’t tell. She was too concerned with the fact that Rin was a fucking hypocrite. “I really have to pee.”
“Meguru?” Ryusei called out at the door. “Is that you?”
“No!” the voice said, doing some kind of strange accent. “It’s not me, I mean her-”
The voice was cut off by stifling of some kind and Sae treated herself to her own annoyed eyeroll. Rin was a hypocrite, the worst kind, but regardless of how they fought, they were still sisters, and at the end of the day, she wanted her to be happy.
After nationals. She couldn’t have both of them sleep deprived.
Despite that thought, she soon forgot about it. It wasn’t difficult. She didn’t even feel her own exhaustion. She didn’t feel it prick at the corners of her eyes. She didn’t feel it in her temples. She felt the day unfolding out in front of her like a carpet unrolling, and she didn’t place a single shaky step.
The four of them left and were dropped off in front of their school to get onto the bus that would make the four hour drive to the arena where nationals was being held. It was a big deal. Sae had been to nationals before. Not as an athlete, but as a spectator. She had seen the massive stage, the way it was slightly different than the spring floors in their school gym, the lights, the way they blinded and cast heat down onto the athletes, the crowd, the way they made up an entire bowl of eyes and screams and chants all around the stage, and the buzz of noise, of reporters, of parents, of coaches. She understood that she should be nervous, but she wasn’t. Ryusei held out a hand to let her climb onto the bus first, packed both their duffel bags into the overhead, took a seat next to her, and Sae leaned her head down on her shoulder.
“Nervous?” Ryusei asked, reaching over to flick Sae’s ponytail lightly, to pull on her hair bow.
“No,” Sae answered honestly.
“Good,” Ryusei said. “I’ll treat you well.”
“You’d better,” Sae said. “I know you’re competent. You’d better not let me down when it counts.”
“Have I ever let you down so far?”
Sae could hear her smirk without having to see it.
“No.”
Anri had even shown up. It surprised Sae a little, though it shouldn’t have. She could respect the woman for the way that she didn’t try to overstep. She understood her role well. She took attendance, ticking them all off on the clipboard, and gave them a short speech, all facts, not even trying to be inspirational, before they took off and she spent the entire rest of the time talking logistics with the driver or keeping to herself.
Sae kept her head on Ryusei’s shoulder, not wanting or bothering to lift it. Twenty minutes into the trip, Sae started to feel the hours of sleep she’d opted out of the previous night and took it upon herself to catch up.
She woke up with that same calmness encasing her just as they were rolling into the city where the competition was to take place. But at the same time, she felt as if she hadn’t really woken up at all. She sat up, saw her girlfriend grinning at her, making a little joke about her being a sleepy head, must be because she had such a good night, and even rubbed her thumb across her eye to get some smudged mascara, but it all happened so smooth, almost dreamlike. She got off the bus and into the arena the same way. Changing, warming up, stretching. They were fluid, easy motions.
It wasn’t like it was unpleasant. Nobody else seemed to feel anything amiss. If anything, Ryusei would have asked after it if she noticed anything off with Sae, like if she was sleepwalking, but she didn’t. She just watched her through the entire thing, let her watch her right back, lifted Sae’s legs over her head one by one to help her stretch, pulled her hands while their feet pressed into each other in deep straddles, held her hand when their team was being called over right before they were to go on. Right before they stepped on stage, Ryusei leaned down and kissed the tender spot where Sae’s neck met her shoulder, and she felt the warmth of it long after she’d pulled away.
The Blue Lock Preparatory Cheerleading squad stepped onto the mat, and then they were stepping off it.
Sae understood that the routine had taken place. She remembered it. But she also felt like she hadn’t been there at all. Like she’d missed it. All of a sudden she was being shuffled back into the audience with the rest of their team, and then they were standing to go sit on the mat for final scoring, and even that happened in slow motion. They announced third place, and then second, neither of them being Blue Lock, and through all of this, Sae felt calm, calm, calm.
Then first place was announced.
She didn’t hear the name of their team or the way Sendou was crying in harsh, ugly sobs, despite the fact that she was on crutches and had not been on the floor, or the way Oliver was cackling and throwing light insults at the other teams or any of the other cheering as much as she heard Ryusei’s mouth land back on her neck, kissing it, and then, in a gloat, “We won.”
And the world came rushing back into her in an explosion of colour and sound.
The trophy was being thrust into her hands. She took it. Of course she took it. She was captain, it was hers to take. The metal was cold. Untouched. Once they were finished here, holding it, gloating it, they’d pack it up and bring it back with them and it would sit in the trophy case of Blue Lock Prep alongside a picture of the team, Sae front and center.
She deserved this. That’s what passed through her mind. It was her senior year, and she’d been putting in work since freshman year to become the captain, become the best, become the girl who was responsible for all of this. This was her trophy. But those thoughts were so fleeting and far away and they didn’t feel like she thought they’d feel. She thought she’d feel different. Accomplished. Like a big turning point had been had.
But it felt more or less the same. Only now she had a trophy in her hands.
Until she felt herself picked up. And all of a sudden Ryusei had jerked her up, was holding her as she held the trophy, was jostling all five foot one of her in the sea of teams trying to hide their disappointment. She didn’t feel a sense of pride about it. She didn’t feel the need to gloat. She just felt the arms wrapping around her waist, the waist that her own legs had found without really thinking about it. That was what felt different. The turning point. The accomplishment.
“You did it, captain,” Ryusei said.
It was sly and intentional, still aimed to get a reaction out of her. She had one to hand over, she just needed to get this damned trophy out of her hands.
“Rin,” Sae said, taking one hand off the trophy to awkwardly lean over and swat her sister on the shoulder.
Rin looked strange, which was to say happy. Her eyes had softened a little. Her mouth could almost be considered a smile. Sae figured it had less to do with the win than it did with the little black and yellow haired flyer at her elbow, which proved to be the case, when her face immediately returned to annoyed upon turning to Sae.
“What?” she snapped, harsh and low.
“Take this,” Sae said, shoving the trophy into her arms.
“Me?” Rin asked, though she didn’t show any hesitation in taking it. “Why me?”
“It’s your team now,” Sae shrugged. “You deserve it.”
And with her hands free, she took Ryusei’s face, her real trophy, in her hands, found a little amusement in the slight confusion in her expression, and then kissed her anyways.
Right in front of everyone. Their team, the rest of the teams, the spectators, the college scouts, everyone. That was her trophy, her accomplishment, her win, the thing she wanted to gloat over.
The commotion eventually settled down, outside of Sae’s eyeline. Everything, besides pink eyes with heavy eyeliner, was entirely out of her eyeline for the rest of their time on the main stage. Suddenly, she was just being ushered off, back towards the change rooms, and just like that, nationals was over. Sae still couldn’t feel that win anywhere upon her. It was something that had happened. All she could feel were Ryusei’s words from when their kiss broke. I guess this means you owe me a real date. She could feel those words all over.
It had taken their team four hours to get to nationals, and it had taken the better part of the entire day for all of the teams to perform, so Anri and the generous budget of Blue Lock Prep was putting them up in a hotel for the night. Not each their own rooms, they were wealthy, but not wealthy enough for that. Two to a room. Which suited Sae just fine. Ryusei too, had no complaints.
She was making that painfully clear, the way she was lying on the bed, on her stomach, head rested in her hands, her feet kicking behind her. She was still in her towel and watching Sae as she walked about the room, brushing her freshly washed hair out, watching right back.
“What?” Sae finally asked.
“Nothing,” Ryusei said. “Just looking at you.”
“Can you look at me a little closer to the edge of the bed?” Sae asked, motioning to Ryusei’s still dripping hair. “I don’t want to sleep in a wet spot.”
“I’ll take the wet spot,” Ryusei said without missing a beat. “I usually do anyways.”
Sae turned away, not wanting to be called out on the way her face flushed. True, for the record. She let it go.
“So,” Ryusei said, still not moving from where she lay, nearly naked on the middle of the still made up mattress. “I hear the other girls are going out for ice cream later.”
“Oh?” Sae said, with the barest amount of interest.
She’d done what she came for. The triumph was over, the war won. The trophy was sitting in Anri’s room as they spoke, waiting to be taken back with them the following morning. What the other girls were doing with their nights didn’t concern her. Nor did she care.
“Rin’s idea, apparently,” Ryusei went on, taking Sae’s acknowledgement for interest. “Funny, right? But, you know, maybe she’ll make a good captain.”
“She’d better,” Sae said. “If she embarrasses me, I’ll make my visits home from college a living hell for her.”
“You wanna go?” Ryusei asked.
“To college?” Sae asked, a little horrified. “Obviously. Don’t you? There were scouts there today. I’m sure you’ll get offers.”
Maybe we’ll end up in the same place, Sae thought but did not say.
“Uh, no,” Ryusei said, grinning widely. “I’m going to be a stripper, and then when I age out of that, I’ll become a real estate agent or something.”
“Seriously?” Sae asked.
They’d never really spoken about their futures before. Their entire futures had just consisted of nationals, which was over, and this promised date, which Sae assumed was taking place this very evening. She’d made her own assumptions about what would come after, but that wasn’t exactly what she’d pictured. Which was fine. She could adjust around it. She assumed strip clubs were the same everywhere. Surely there would be one near wherever she ended up going to college.
“I meant to ice cream,” Ryusei said.
“Wait, what?” Sae asked.
Ryusei rolled her ridiculously pink eyes and rolled off the bed, discarding the towel as she did. Caring little that she was completely naked, she got to her feet, put her hands on her hips, and gave Sae a look.
“If your goal is to make me focus,” Sae said, looking her up and down. “This is not the best tactic.”
“Eyes up here, gorgeous,” Ryusei said, circling her face with one of her shorter nailed fingers. “I’m asking if you want to go to ice cream with everyone else. We probably should show up. You being captain and all.”
“I thought you’d want to go on our date,” Sae said honestly.
Ryusei just shrugged. “This counts.”
“You really want to go?” Sae asked.
She didn’t know much about dates, had absolutely zero experience, but from what she could discern and imagine, she wholeheartedly preferred being alone with Ryusei, wherever they happened to be, to being somewhere with the rest of the Blue Lock idiots in a room full of the insufferable mood that would come with coming off a win. Rin as the newfound captain. Her making eyes at that little flyer that was in her room this morning. Aiku being, well, Aiku. Sendou being, well, Sendou. Sae didn’t really want to chit chat and she didn’t want to squeal and have her arms grabbed and she really, really didn’t want ice cream.
“Come on,” Ryusei said. “It’ll be fun.”
Then again, she was an easy sell. Within reason.
“When?” Sae asked.
“I think everyone’s leaving in about an hour,” Ryusei said, already moving to sit back on the bed, knowing full well what was coming.
“So,” Sae said. “We have time.”
“Oh, we have time,” Ryusei said, barely able to lift her hand to beckon Sae forward before she was upon her, making good use of that time.
The ice cream shop was pretty much as bad as Sae had expected, something she learned before the two of them, running late, obviously, even stepped through the door. The shop itself was aggressively pink and blue, neon lights inside and out, and was filled with an entire team of cheerleaders, now dressed in street clothes, but all recognizable all the same. She could see them through the windows. Rin was spoon feeding that little bee coloured flyer a bite, seemingly unbothered. Aiku and Sendou were sharing mochi too, Aiku feeding little miss glass ankles because even though that was where her injury stemmed from, it made sense somehow. Or maybe the two of them were just insufferable too. None of the other tables looked any better. Or empty. Sae’s nose scrunched without her having to think about it.
“Oh, come on, don’t be grumpy,” Ryusei said, snaking an arm around her shoulders and pushing her further towards the shop. “You don’t have to eat anything. Just be a good sport.”
You don’t have to eat anything.
As much as this was still her win, still her trophy, it was no less mortifying to be known, to be seen. Admittedly, she had started to think about food a little differently. Slightly. Marginally. But differently. She was not going to give up her regime so easily. She was planning to keep cheerleading. She had a scholarship in her future, she was sure of it, she just wasn’t sure where it would take her. She’d need to keep her body and workout routine and diet.
But she’d be a college student. Things would be different. This, the hardest part, the getting there, would be over. Cheerleading would an afterthought. A side plot in her story while she tried to figure out what she wanted to do with her adult life. And she had less of a concrete plan than Ryusei did.
It had started with the pizza crust. Safe food. It was happening again now. In the same voice, but a more reasonable argument. Once in a while won’t hurt.
The entire shop erupted into cheers when Sae walked in. She hadn’t been expecting it. Actually, she’d expected to be wholly ignored. She wasn’t a part of this group, not really, not anymore, and even if she was, she was the tyrant at the top of the totem pole. She wasn’t so dense that she didn’t know that. But there the girls were, getting out of their seats, grabbing her arms, hugging her, thanking her.
She didn’t really know what to say. She just tried to smile, but it felt awkward.
“Alright, I’ll admit it,” Ryusei said as they took their place in line. “You were right.”
“Obviously,” Sae said. Knee jerk reaction. “About what?”
“We should have gone on our date,” Ryusei said. “Ice cream is great and all, but I’m fucking starving. I blame you. You worked up quite an appetite in me.”
“We can go after,” Sae said.
“Sure, sure,” Ryusei said. “I’ll make this quick then.”
“What are you getting?” Sae asked, looking over the menu for herself. Normally, all she saw was calories, and she still did, that wasn’t going away anytime soon, but she saw something else. It looked good.
“I don’t know,” Ryusei said. “I could eat this entire menu. But I’ll get something small and then we can dip.”
“Do you want to share something?” Sae asked.
Ryusei did something that wasn’t quite flinching, but almost. Her head jerked, towards Sae, and those pink eyes she’d been looking in to all afternoon, for the past few months, scrutinized her. As if trying to figure out if she was serious. Or if she was an imposter.
Right as Sae was about to let her insecurity get the better of her and withdraw the offer, Ryusei beat her to it. “Yes. I want to. Best date ever. What do you want?”
I want you to come to college with me, Sae thought. Or, at the very least, follow me somewhere nearby.
She ignored it. “You pick.”
“Taiyaki ice cream it is,” Ryusei said.
After getting their stupid looking ice cream stuffed fish, they went to join the rest of the girls and Sae allowed herself to be ushered into the booth where Aiku and Sendou were. Across from the two of them. In the seats they were saving for them, on the off chance they showed up. Sae still found the two of them insufferable, mostly because Aiku and Sendou were Aiku and Sendou, but also because something had clearly transpired between the two of them that Sae didn’t want to comment on or imagine. But the conversation was smooth regardless. The win had everyone in high spirits. And Sae did feel a slight pinch of empathy, sympathy maybe. Aiku and Sendou were seniors too. She had no idea where they were going after this, what their plans were. They’d been friends all through school, but not that kind. They’d never talked about it. And when it came to Sendou, now, she didn’t know if she even had any options anymore.
“So,” Sae said, her first time speaking once the conversation between Aiku, Sendou, and Ryusei had given way to a pause. “Do you guys know what you’re doing next year?”
“Holy shit, Itoshi,” Aiku said, slapping the table. “Did you just ask us a personal question?”
“Oh, piss off,” Sae said.
“I’m kidding,” Aiku said, sharing a look with Ryusei of all people like, can you get a load of this girl? “I have an apprenticeship. Car mechanics.”
“That’s,” Sae started, but words kind of failed her. What she managed was, “Interesting.”
“I’ll probably go back to modelling,” Sendou said.
“Modelling?” Sae asked. Back to? I mean, sure, Sendou was pretty, but modelling?
“I’ve modelled on and off since elementary school,” Sendou said, her voice dipping into an offended whine. “I talk about it a lot.”
“Oh,” Sae said. She was sure she was right, she just didn’t really know what to say to that. “Good for you.”
“Ignore her, Shu,” Aiku said, feeding her another piece of pale pink mochi and laughing. “We’re second class citizens, remember? She doesn’t pay attention to us. Her and her little girlfriend are looking down at us from their ivory tower. Don’t take it to heart.”
“I’m a good model,” Sendou protested, holding a hand in front of her mouth to hide the sight of her speaking while it was full. “I make decent money and everything.”
“I’m no first class citizen,” Ryusei said. “I’m a heathen. Going straight to the clubs. Bottle service, dancing, the whole works. If I can’t get this one to join me, well, then I guess she can go to college.”
Aiku laughed, like that was just so hilarious. Sendou continued pouting. Sae might have cut in too, to snap at them to shut up or say something else equally harsh that would not gain her any brownie points, but Ryusei was holding a plastic spoon out to her, covered in ice cream and a bit of pastry too. Sae opened her own mouth to accept it, as if it was just second nature. Both Aiku and Sendou fell quiet then. Sae was irritated, loathing the fact that her strict eating habits were the cause of so much concern and surprise, but it wasn’t really them that had gone quiet but the rest of the world. Because the ice cream was so sweet, so rich, and the pastry was so soft, the perfect texture, and the whole thing was divine. Especially those pink eyes, the rest of her gorgeous face, her eyebrows raised. She was so beautiful.
“Good, right?” Ryusei asked her.
It was. This was the best date ever.