Chapter Text
It felt like her head was on fire, and she had trouble keeping her eyes open. Seemed like a few students in the room felt the same way as her. They typed with their cloudy eyes, looking more and more like the living dead as the sun rose up.
Three hours of napping for two days. That was all Tina got after pushed herself through the deadline. Her heartbeat rapidly from drowning in caffeine. At least she managed to send the essay in time. Now her only problem is keeping her head cool whenever Abernarthy insulted her and making sure her customers get the right drink of their choice. Right after she clocked off her shift, she'd go to her only class on Friday and Tina couldn't wait to spend her Friday night unconscious, in a deathlike slumber.
The thought of skipping Graves's class lingered in her mind. But she couldn't. She had to be there to defend her essay if needed—if she could keep her mind on the subject. Her eyes are open and alert, but she had the attention span of a pea.
"Do you need help with that?"
Wait, she did send her essay, right? Did she attach it on her email? In all of a sudden Tina remembered the article was saved in the download folder. It would be beyond embarrassing if she actually sent that picture of Ewan McGregor with the caption: Help me, Obi Juan whoever the fuck you are… I am your only ho.
“Tina? You okay there?” Chastity’s voice yanked her from her daydream, thinking well, she wouldn’t actually mind being Graves’s only ho—
“Oh!” Tina realized that she’d been wiping the same spot for probably a good five minutes. She looked up to Chastity frozen in her way to put the freshly baked pastry onto the display. “No, I’m okay, just… lack a little sleep,” she let out a weird laugh.
Chastity seemed genuinely worried about her. "You're sweating, and it's freezing here. Don't you want to take a day off? I can cover you."
Aw. Aren’t you like, the best? But no, I’m okay, C. I can handle this.
It took Tina a few seconds to realize that she needed to actually answer Chastity verbally.
"Of course, of course, I'm okay," Tina laughed, trying to be reassuring but the sound that came out of her mouth was disturbing, "you don't need to worry about me. But I'll let you know if I need your help."
The shorter girl looked at Tina in disbelief, but eventually, she seemed to accept it. "Alright, Tee. I'll be right here," she said, walking to the other side of the room.
Tina knew she shouldn't open her phone during work, but oh, fuck it— she needed to see that she did send the essay, not some stupid memes. And turned out she did. At least it granted her a moment of relief, and another second to think about Chastity's offer.
Leaving her shift and coming back to her dorm was not a choice. Tina didn't want Bunty to scold or ask her questions, and taking another nap between now and her class is dangerous. She's pretty sure she wouldn't be awake on time. Staying on her shift sounded better.
Until an hour later.
Tina did an excellent job of keeping her mind focused, even when some customers did say she looked exhausted. But she didn't give the wrong coffee or change to them, so all is well.
But then the corner of her eyes noticed a glimpse of very familiar light brown hair passing on the other side of the glass wall—she automatically ran to Chastity.
“C!” Tina whispered, rushing her way to the backdoor as the little shopkeeper bell went ding-ding. “Get—get there, i need to go to the back for a while— “
Chastity, bless her, immediately grabbed a bucket and pushed it to Tina. “Is everything okay? Are you feeling sick?”
Tina didn't answer—she took the bucket and power walked her way through the storage cabinets to hide there.
She didn't have the mental capacity to meet him right now—she didn't even wear any makeup. It wasn't like she wore it all the time, or she cared so much about her appearance—she just didn't wish to explain her poor time management to him. Because Tina aware of how she looked like: sunken eyes, pale lips, and sheet-white skin. No one with a decent amount to sleep would look like this.
From the thin wall, she could hear Chastity talking to Newt faintly. “—looks sick. Pale face, cold sweat, and all that.”
Of course, Newt must've seen her scooted away.
The last time she met him was on Tuesday morning—three days ago—when Newt came to the Siren's and give Tina her already-checked paper. They were texting through the three-and-a-half days' gap; not too much, but also a bit more than she was texting Bunty or Nagini. He didn't know that Tina'd been working her ass off in the last few days, and she didn't want to explain why.
Because how do you explain to your TA that you’ve been losing sleep because you’ve been pushing your actual assignments to spend more time with him? Ridiculous.
Something had changed afterthat night, the night he held her under the small umbrella. They still hang out together, last Saturday and Sunday afternoon and Monday night, but it seemed like both of them became acutely aware of any physical contact that might happen. He didn't touch her, neither did she. Well, not deliberately.
There was a time when they sat outside a nearby cafe on a breezy late afternoon after two hours of transcribing Newt's handwritten notes. It was a small round table, and their knees bumped into each other— he pulled his knee immediately, and move his chair a few inches away from Tina.
There was also a time when she leaned over too close as they were filing—her skin grazed him on the very bit, and Newt would pull himself away a second too fast as if he was electrocuted.
But it was still the same activity; only more professional, less casual. Newt would take Tina to downtown and taking pictures of an angry squirrel and actually taught her how to use range finder—or she would file and archive his work in silence as he was upstairs, developing his pictures.
Some part of her feel relieved, but another bit in the corner was hurt. Newt actively tried to not have any physical contact with her, and she was— this is weird —mildly offended by it.
If Tina thought about the umbrella waist grab again, it did make her a bit flushed. The touch felt too affectionate to be a polite gesture… or it could be just her spending too much time thinking about it. Maybe that's just how Newt did it. Perhaps he wasn't avoiding physical touch with her.
Still sitting, Tina tried listening to the conversation although she couldn't hear much because all the machine whirling behind her. Her heart was beating fast, but it's not from the caffeine anymore. She sat still and waited until Chastity showed up.
“Are you sure you don’t want to get back home?” Chastity kneeled, her eyebrows raised. When Tina shook her head, she asked again, “I guess it was your friend since he frequently comes to see you? He asked me to tell you that if you need a lift home, he’ll be a call away.”
“He is,” Tina gulped, receiving Chastity’s hand as she tried to stand up. “I’ll… I'll let him know later. Thanks, C.”
Chastity scanned her whole body as if she could detect Tina's illness and then sighed. “Let’s switch, I’ll take the cashier today.”
And by that, Tina got her spot behind the cookie display. After thanking Chastity two times, she sat and rested her body to the wall. Her mind still flying relentlessly to Newt and hoping she wouldn't meet him later at the faculty. To be fair, in all honesty, Tina just wanted to be left alone for the rest of the day.
Her reflection from the little display door stared back at her. Damn, she looked awful. Tina made a mental note to wear a thin layer of makeup later, just to make herself appeared like she had 6 hours total—not 3—of sleeping in 48 hours.
She should've just went straight to her bed since the end of her shift.
Graves didn't even show his nose to the class. It was fucking cancelled. A third of the class has the same tired look on their faces; some of them bringing their coffee to the hall. But then, four minutes into the class without any sign of Graves's perfect hair, an email came to their inbox saying the class was cancelled.
Great. Now bed.
Tina practically dragged her feet on her way past the faculty. She tried to at least drag it faster, because she really, really missed her IKEA comforter. Nothing in the world is better than her beloved duvet. Except maybe her pillow.
“Oi, Tina—!”
The voice startled her since her mind was filled with the tranquillity of her room. Tina swayed back in a sudden—her elbow flung over her body without knowing there was someone exactly behind her.
She knocked Newt’s hand hard . Now a handful of money, his wallet, and third of his coffee are scattered on the ground.
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.
"I'm sorry, I didn't see you—" Tina muttered, kneeling to pick all his stuff. Newt didn't respond immediately—he ran to chase his flying £10s.
That was when she saw it. His wallet laid open, showing a picture of a smiling girl inside. Tina bit her bottom lip, recognizing the girl in the image. She snatched it fast and pretended it was closed the whole time as he walked back. It felt like she invaded Newt's privacy.
“Newt,” she stood up with his help. Fuckity fuck. Her body swayed as she tried to balance herself. “I’m sorry. I get surprised so easily— “
The corner of his mouth still curved upward, despite the coffee stain on his shirt. He rubbed Tina's arms in a calming manner. “Don’t worry about it,” he waved, taking the wallet and money from her outstretched hand. “You alright? You look— “
“Awful, yeah,” she smiled weakly. Fuck a thousand times, shouldn't you be in a class somewhere? "Not feeling really well today. I'm about to get home and get some sleep.".
“Do you want me to walk you?” he struggled on putting the money back to the wallet. “You seemed so… weary.”
“Oh—thanks Newt, but no, really. I’m okay,” Tina sent him an assuring smile while her soul dying inside.
“You look like you could faint anytime."
“Trust me, I feel better than I look,” she lied. "Don't you have a class to assist?"
His brows furrowed in her answer. "I'm about to go; Merrythought left her files at the library, so she sent me off. No class?"
"Graves bailed,"—Newt raised his brows—"But I'm not protesting. Been waiting to get on my bed since—well you know, I really need to rest," she added. Tina almost said this morning , but she didn't want to talk about how she avoided him today.
Then his fingers grazed her cheek.
The back of his free hands laid on her skin for a few seconds. It wasn't a caressing gesture—he's checking her temperature. It felt awkward for the most, but mainly it was because they're in front of the faculty's library. Students walk passed by after them, but it didn't seem to disturb Newt.
Tina sure her body temperature only dropped a little. Newt pulled his hand away, still looked worried. "Alright then—make sure you don't faint walking down the stairs."
Finally . Tina smiled weakly at him and walked away, trying not to run. But four steps ahead, Newt called her name again.
Tina turned her head, starting to feel dizzy as Newt walked onto her. "Yeah?"
“I'm terribly sorry—are you happened to be free tomorrow evening?”
"Oh, do you need something?" she looked up to his eyes. Ugh, his pretty hazel eyes. "Because… I'm not… free. I've promised the girls, sorry."
He stepped back, his shoulders relaxed. "Ah. Okay, it's not a problem."
"I probably can do it on Sunday," Tina offered. "What is it?"
Newt glanced at her, almost shyly, the edge of his lips formed an awkward smile. "Nothing. I just—want to ask you out."
What? Her mouth felt dry when she asked, “O—out?”
The buttons on his white shirt were being pulled away as he inhaled. "Yes. There's an exhibition opening, and I'm invited—thought you'd like her works."
That sounded interesting and suddenly Tina kind of regretted saying she already couldn't go. "Oh! Who is it?"
“Eulalie Hicks. American photojournalist,” he added when Tina furrowed on the name.
“Never heard her name.”
“She’s a member of Phoenix Photos,” he said as if it explained everything. His expression looked subtly disappointed. “So… you can’t come with me.”
Tina proceeded to give him her best apology look. “I… really want to, but don’t think I can, I’m sorry.”
"It's alright. Don't think about that," Newt smiled.
Something inside was pushing her to be a little reckless, so before she lost that dizzyness, Tina asked, "...can’t Leta go with you?" her eyes glanced on Newt's wallet for two seconds.
"She's working," he said, looking unbothered. "And she won't be around after next Thursday, not at least until December," he added nonchalantly.
What does he mean by that ?
"Oh, okay," Tina responded, feeling stupid because she didn't know what to say. "See you later, then?"
"Text me when you get home, so I know you didn’t die in the way," he grinned. Waving his hand, Newt turned and walked away.
There was so much thought flooding her mind. Her heart still beating rapidly and—again—it's not from the caffeine she'd chugged. But Tina decided not to think much about it to keep her head focused on something more important: getting home. She felt dizzier and dizzier with each step—cold sweat running down her neck.
Fifteen minutes later and she's on her dorm. Tina kicked her shoes off, took off her bra without taking off her t-shirt first, and threw herself onto the bed; she didn't bother to change her outfit first.
She took her phone and type:
And by that, she put her phone down and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.
It was already 11 am when she finally woke up from that coma.
20 hours. Tina slept a freaking 20 hours.
Her head felt heavy—she was in a state between still not enough sleep and too much sleep! Wake up already! And since her stomach was protesting, she decided it's better to wake up, get a shower, and make something to eat.
Taking her phone with her, Tina walked out of her room, to check on the bathroom. Turned out Bunty already in there first, so she walked to the kitchen.
Inside their pantry, Tina found a pack of spicy Korean ramyun and thought, what the hell, she might have needed the spicy kick to keep her awake. Two minutes after put the instant noodle in the water, she turned the stove on and left the kitchen to sit on the sofa.
Soup? He must’ve thought she was really sick. Would it be rude to say, oh no, i can eat better than that. Anyway, chicken fried rice sounds great , though? But one thing for sure, she wouldn’t let him know that she’s—once again—relying on the power of instant noodle.
The thought of Newt coming to her dorm and bringing her soup made her giggle. It sounded so absurd yet super sweet. What would they do if he did appear on the doorstep, though? Would she just take the soup from him and thank him like he’s a delivery guy? No… should she ask him to come upstairs to her room? But for what?
Maybe she could ask him to watch some movies on her dorm sometimes, for a change. Just a casual movie night. Bunty could join them.
There were the triple dots, blinking, blinking, blinking and disappearing. Tina waited for a few minutes, but nothing came up. Seemed like something happened before Newt hit send, or he just simply decided not to reply her.
Tina almost forgot that she wasn't alone when Bunty came out from the bathroom, wearing her towel, wet hair stuck on her face. She grinned to Tina before her expression changed immediately, and her eyebrows furrowed. Without a word, she sniffed around in her towel and walked towards the kitchen.
Tina’s heart dropped to her belly when she realized she’d been boiling her ramyun since… she didn’t remember when. And she was just about to stand from the sofa when Bunty exclaimed in horror:
“MY RAMEN??!!”