Chapter Text
Eiji's offer of 'when all of this is over' comes a lot faster than Ash thought it would.
Ash has never had a lot of faith in the law. He knows firsthand exactly what kind of people run this country. And if you ask him? The White House can go screw itself.
But Eiji offered him a way out.
Not just out of that situation, but out of this country. A way to ... start over.
But Ash doesn't deserve to start over.
... Does he?
— — —
"You're scared to leave?" Shorter asks, and Ash bristles.
"I'm not scared!" he insists. "I'm just ... afraid."
"Pretty sure those are synonyms, buddy."
Ash sighs, running a hand through his hair. It's weird, being with Shorter off of Dino's estates, even now.
They won the legal battles. All of it. They're all off the hook for everything. Ash had to testify against every client whose name he could remember, and it's been a fucking grueling process. He's exhausted. And he's tired of fighting. Tired of ... everything, honestly.
"I don't know," Ash admits. "In some ways, being out has been harder than being there was."
Shorter grimaces. "I'm sorry, Ash."
Ash.
Everyone calls him that now. It's nice.
Max asked if he wanted to be called by Aslan instead, but ... Aslan is dead. Aslan's been dead for a long time.
Bu Ash? Ash is learning to live all over again.
"It's okay," Ash says. "It's not your fault. Any of you. I just don't know what to do now. I mean ... I'm not even good at any real life skills. I haven't been in formal education since I was eight, and I ... Shorter, I really only have one skill. And I'd rather not go back to that."
"What about modeling? They'd love you. You've certainly got the looks for it."
"Yeah, right. The looks, maybe, but modeling's a tough world. Nothing like everything I've done so far."
Shorter winces. "I'm sorry. That's not what I meant."
Ash blinks. It takes a second to even register that he said something wrong again. "No, I'm sorry. My ... my mind is all sorts of warped, and ... See? This is why I can't be around normal people."
"Can I level with you?" Shorter asks, looking right into Ash's eyes.
Ash shifts, a little uncomfortable with the eye contact. "What's up?"
"I think you should go to Japan with Eiji. You don't have to be afraid anymore, okay?"
"... I feel like I'm running from the only life I've ever known."
"You're not running from anything, buddy. You're running to Eiji."
Eiji.
Isn't that all that Ash has ever wanted, really?
— — —
Ash takes a deep breath, then knocks on the door of the room Eiji's been staying in, though it isn't closed all the way.
"Yes?" Eiji calls.
"Uh—it's me," Ash replies, quiet enough that he's not certain if Eiji will be able to hear him through the door. "Can I come in?"
"Of course."
Another deep breath. Okay. He's doing this shit.
He pushes the door open.
"Eiji, I ... I need to talk to you."
Eiji sits up on the bed, shifting until his legs are over the edge, and pats the spot next to him. Ash hesitantly walks over and takes a seat beside Eiji.
Beside Eiji ... Maybe he could get used to that.
It's silent for a minute. Eventually, Eiji asks, "What is it you wanted to talk about?"
"You—you asked me a couple questions, and I'm here to answer them. If that's okay." When Ash glances at Eiji, he's smiling.
"Of course it is. And any answer you have is okay, too."
Ash swallows, fidgeting a little. "Okay. Well, first, you asked if we were ... together. And—yes. I mean, if you'd like to be, I'd like to ... I'd also like to be together. With you. As a couple."
Eiji's smile turns into a full on grin. "Really?"
"Yeah. If you want to."
"I do, Ash. If that's okay."
Ash nods. "I ... I really ..." He trails off, but Eiji goes for it.
"I love you. I hope that that is not going too far, but ... it's true."
For some stupid fucking reason, Ash feels like he's on the verge of tears. He tries to blink them away. "You too," he mumbles. "I also—yeah."
Eiji gently grabs for one of Ash's hands. "It is okay. It's all okay. You don't have to do anything you're not ready for."
"About that—uh, I ... I want to ... Japan. With you. If that offer is still ..."
Eiji suddenly launches himself at Ash, tackling him back onto the bed. Ash yelps, but—it feels safe, still. Despite being about to cry only moments ago, he finds himself laughing now.
Eiji laughs too. "Of course the offer is still open! Even if you said no right now, I would wait for you forever."
"You won't have to," Ash whispers. He wraps his arms around Eiji, holding him close. "I'm here with you now. And I'll stay by your side, like you've stayed by mine."
"I am so, so happy to hear that," Eiji says. His voice is gentle, and caring, and ... holy shit.
Ash hesitates, chewing on his lip for a moment, but ... "I know I kind of fucked up our first kiss. Would you be willing to let me try again?"
Eiji smiles. His weight is pressing against Ash, but a body against his own has never felt so comforting before. Eiji drops his head down to Ash's shoulder, and he laughs. Ash's heart glows a little.
"Oh, Ash. I will let you try as many times as you would like. I would be happy for you to kiss me for the rest of our lives."
"Then I will," Ash resolves, barely more than a whisper. Eiji looks up, and Ash smiles at him. Their faces are close—inches that might as well not exist with the closeness Ash feels to Eiji in this moment. "Kiss me?"
"Only if you kiss me back," Eiji teases.
"I think I can manage that."