Chapter Text
Lan Wangji gently ran his fingers through Wei Wuxian’s hair. The low buzzing from the tv was comforting as he was looking at his beloved. Asleep and leaning on his shoulder. He gently hummed as he twirled his hair around his fingers. His hair was dark like the night and smelled like lotus. Wei Wuxian would always use a lotus scented shampoo because it reminded him of home. It reminded Lan Wangji of home too.
Wei Wuxian's eyes twitched open and came back to reality. He rubbed his eyes to focus again, only to be met by golden eyes. He grinned at Lan Wangji as he grabbed his hand with his and folded them together.
“Wei Ying.” Lan Wangji's voice was low, but filled with adoration.
“Hi, Lan Zhan.” Wei Wuxian was smiling even wider now. He glanced at the clock and asked, “Oh, it’s seven pm already? Has Sizhui already left to Jingyi's house then?”
Lan Wangji nodded, “Mn. He left thirty minutes ago. He headed out without saying goodbye because he did not want to wake you up.”
“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Wei Wuxian chuckled. Lan Wangji was still brushing his fingers through his hair. Wei Wuxian leaned towards the comforting touch. He whispered warmly, “I wish we could stay like this forever.”
“Mn. Let’s do that then.”
Wei Wuxian dramatically gasped. “Lan Zhan?! You can’t say that!!! We still have responsibilities and jobs,” he teased.
Lan Wangji pecked his head and murmured. “Doesn’t matter. Would rather stay here with Wei Ying forever.”
“Forever?”
“Mn. Forever,” he muttered.
Wei Wuxian’s heart softened, but also made him ache. He wanted to ask something, but stopped himself. He didn’t want to ruin anything again. He couldn’t risk anything. Lan Wangji gazed at him. His eyebrows furrowed and he leaned closer to him.
“Wei Ying, what is it?”
“Ah, it’s nothing. It’s stupid, hahaha…” he laughed awkwardly.
“Nothing you say is stupid.”
Wei Wuxian didn’t know how to deny him. He thought for a moment, before he got the courage to ask, “I know we were joking just now… You know, about forever, but what’s gonna happen to us from now on..? Is this just something temporary or-”
“I wasn’t joking, Wei Ying.” Wei Wuxian threw his gaze up, just to meet Lan Wangji’s intense stare again. His golden eyes were enchanting. “If Wei Ying wants this to last forever, then forever it is.” He squeezed his hand gently. “Do you want that..?”
Wei Wuxian let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “More than anything,” he whispered as an affectionate smile blossomed across his face. “I love you.”
Lan Wangji softly smiled back. “I love you too.”
Wei Wuxian softly giggled. Before thinking over his words, he blurted out. “Come live with me.” His eyes widened in realization and his shoulders tensed. His mouth widened, in hope that he would say something logical.
Instead he began babbling away, “Fuck- That was a bit too forward, sorry. What I tried to ask is if we are just going to live separately or..? I mean… I would like to share a house, but only if you’re comfortable with that. It’s not like we have to rush with that-” Suddenly a finger was on his lips.
Lan Wangji shook his head from side to side. He huffed lightly. “Wei Ying. We’ve lived together for several years in the past. We’re not rushing anything. I would love to anyway.”
“Really..?”
“Mn, really. Don’t feel afraid to ask these kinds of things. No matter what you have to say or ask, it’s important to me. You’re important to me,” he stated.
Wei Wuxian whined in despair, “Laan Zhaaan!!! You can’t say these kinds of things. No mercy on my poor heart…” His face was crimson colored. He buried his head in the crook of his neck.
“You’re important to me too.” He took a deep breath and continued, “I want to spend everyday with you. See your face by my side every morning and every night. I want to share every good day and every bad day with you, no matter how bad the bad days are. I want to be by your side forever. And if I’m lucky, I want to dance in the afterlife with you too.”
Lan Wangji hooked his head on top of Wei Wuxian’s and pulled him into a tight embrace. “I would like that,” Lan Wangji whispered adoredly.
They sat there quietly for a few moments, before Wei Wuxian started muttering to himself. “Dance in the afterlife with you…Dance in the afterlife… Dance… Dance…with you..?” Suddenly Wei Wuxian jumped off the sofa. He stood and gaped at him in realization.
He grabbed Lan Wangji’s arms and stared at him. “Omg, Lan Zhan. You have to dance with me. Right now or I will literally lose my shit. This is literally a fucking crime!!! We haven’t done this in ages. Literally!!!”
Lan Wangji huffed fondly as he stood up. Wei Wuxian dragged him towards him and wrapped his arms around Lan Wangji’s waist, making them stand only a few inches away from each other. Lan Wangji settled his arms around him in the same way.
Wei Wuxian took his phone out of his pocket and turned on the first song that came to mind.
Two slow dancers - Mitski
0:11
He put the volume on full and threw the phone onto the table. The low beat was comforting as they slowly swung back and forth. The melody was nice and soon a low voice started singing.
Does it smell like a school gymnasium in here? It's funny how they're all the same. It's funny how you always remember and we've both done it all a hundred times before.
Wei Wuxian thought to himself. A school gymnasium? This is giving me déjà vu haha.
He peeked up at Lan Wangji. His hair was covering his shoulders. His eyes were almost closed, but he could tell his eyes were still looking at him. Wei Wuxian asked fondly, "Remember the first time we did this?"
He nodded with a smile on his face. "Mn. Last year of highschool. Right after we started dating."
“I remember how stiff you were then! It was as if you had never been on the dance floor before,” he chuckled. He squeezed his waist with his arms.
“It was my first time on the dance floor. I was also flustered and didn’t know what to do when you asked me to dance with you,” he mumbled. His ears turned slightly pink, making Wei Wuxian die internally. If it wasn’t such a sweet and calm moment, he would’ve squealed.
Too cute!!! he thought. People would always say that Lan Wangji was composed and emotionless, but Wei Wuxian couldn’t see it. He could read him like an open book. The small changes in his expression could tell so much and he honestly thought it was adorable. Lan Wangji had never been emotionless. Wei Wuxian was sure it was rather the opposite.
When Lan Wangji cared for something, he cared for it with his entire heart. That’s one of the things he loved about Lan Wangji. His heart and his compassion. His love and care for others. His intelligence and his stubbornness. Everything. He didn’t understand how everyone hadn’t fallen head over heels for him, but honestly? He was glad they hadn’t. That meant he had Lan Wangji for himself with no competition. Well, the closest he came to competition was Lan Wangji’s rabbits, but he was sure no one could beat that.
He tucked some of Lan Wangji’s hair behind his ear and beamed at him. “Doesn’t matter how good you were. It’s still one of my favorite memories,” he admitted. Wei Wuxian laid his forehead on Lan Wangji’s shoulder and muttered dotingly, “You still smell like sandalwood. You know that, right?” He moved his head so his cheek was against his shoulder, giving him the opportunity to gaze at Lan Wangji’s face.
Lan Wangji gave him a funny look. It made Wei Wuxian laugh. Eventually Lan Wangji answered, “Mn. It is still my favorite incense to use.” They were still moving slowly with the music.
At this moment it looked like they were basking in the sunset light. He tilted his eyes upwards and stared at Lan Wangji with adoration. “I thought that all these years going by would make you change, but you're still the same Lan Zhan as the one I knew thirteen years ago,” he giggled.
“Same goes for you, Wei Ying.” His mouth was slightly turned upwards. To Wei Wuxian, this was his favorite thing to witness, except for Lan Wangji’s quiet laughs. They would always warm his heart.
Lan Wangji continued, “I don’t know how it’s possible, but you’re even more beautiful than I remembered.” He leaned his head on Wei Wuxian’s shoulder. So much time had gone by, but it felt like they were in the past again.
“You’re so cheesy,” Wei Wuxian teased.
“I can be cheesier.”
“Oh my god, Lan Zhan-”
Lan Wangji gazed at him again as he started reciting, "I carry your heart with me. I carry it in my heart. I am never without it. Anywhere I go, you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling."
Wei Wuxian lifted his head and grinned at him. "Hm, a poem? But aren't you a history teacher?"
Lan Wangji did the same as Wei Wuxian. He dotingly stared into his eyes as he stated, "Mn. Even so, I still need a way to show my love for you. I want you to know how much I love you."
Wei Wuxian’s face turned all shades of pink. "Lan Zhan!! You can't say that kind of stuff without a warning!!! My heart can't handle it!!! You're gonna give me a heart attack!" he whined as he buried his head in his chest. No matter how much he loved to flirt with others, he had never been good at handling it himself.
Lan Wangji had a soft smile on his face as he hummed, "Mn. We can't let that happen." He stroked his back gently. It was comforting. Wei Wuxian had missed this. He really had. He stayed there for a moment to save this moment. Cherish it.
After a few minutes, Wei Wuxian was finally able to compose himself. He raised his gaze to look at Lan Wangji once again. As Wei Wuxian looked into his eyes, it was as if his existence brightened the room. Brightened his life.
Lan Wangji was his light. His sun.
He gasped in a breath. He felt blinded by his beauty.
Suddenly Lan Wangji’s expression turned worried. Sad. Wei Wuxian furrowed his brows in confusion when suddenly Lan Wangji lifted his chin with his hand. Wei Wuxian’s eyes wandered back and forth as he moved closer. Lan Wangji pressed his lips on his and kissed him gently. His hand slid over his cheek and his thumb was softly stroking over it.
First now did Wei Wuxian understand why Lan Wangji appeared so worried. He was crying. He didn’t know for how long he had been crying, but Lan Wangji noticed it a lot earlier than he did. He wasn’t completely sure why he was crying. He felt overwhelmed. His feelings were being poured out of him and he wasn’t sure how to stop it.
Lan Wangji separated them briefly before he began kissing away his tears. Wei Wuxian had always hated feeling vulnerable in front of others, but something with Lan Wangji made it feel different. He felt safe. He didn’t feel suffocated. His hands trembled and his grip tightened.
"I've missed you so much," he sobbed. Tears were still rolling down his cheeks. Lan Wangji’s heart ached as he looked at him. He held him closer as he whispered, "I’ve missed you too."
Wei Wuxian wished he could go back in time and remove all those painful years. He always felt responsible for what happened and wasn’t sure he would ever let go of it. If he just hadn't been that stupid. If he had just listened..
Wei Wuxian squeezed back as he choked out, "I'm sorry." All of his regrets washed over him, making him tremble. He took in a deep breath as he continued, "Thank you for-"
Before he was able to finish his words, Lan Wangji shut him up with his lips. It was a gentle kiss, but Wei Wuxian melted into it quickly. He moved his hands up to his face, holding him delicately. After a few moments, Lan Wangji pulled back.
He looked up at him as he gently said, "Between us, there is no need for ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’.”