Chapter Text
Nothing.
It was everything here.
There was no light. There was no sound.
It was…. a place? It was nowhere.
Without emotion. Without thoughts.
...
But it was where everything began.
It was a long time before there was something. But there was, and it was strange.
A faint glow from somewhere. Unnatural, it was, but something. That was enough.
It was silent, in the place without sound, the little light was not ready, but it will be, soon.
It will be okay.
.
.
.
.
.
It’s dark.
It’s silent.
And everything
Is scattered.
Everything makes no sense. What….?
What
Is
this
place
…?
I don’t know why, but I am here.
...waiting.
Waiting for… something?
The thoughts are everywhere, disappearing as soon as they appear, replacing themselves with silence. But the darkness does not change.
Or maybe it does?
I don’t know. I know nothing but here.
That’s okay. I am okay with knowing nothing. All of the other thoughts are okay too, with knowing nothing. Knowing here is enough, for now.
...
I am waiting.
.
.
.
.
.
If it wasn’t so dark and so silent I do not know if I would have noticed, but it was there.
What….is that? The thoughts echo.
A sound. It was a sound. (sound?)
Something new.
It’s getting louder.
The sound repeats itself over and over (and overandoverandover) again. It’s getting faster, but only slightly.
But I am okay, this new thing doesn’t bother me.
It’s no longer silent here. But that’s okay.
The sounds and the everywhere thoughts make me not alone.
Alone? Is that what this is? Is it what I am?
Alive.
I am alive?
Or alone?
Both of those things?
Maybe.
The thoughts don’t make too much sense.
Maybe I’m
just
okay.
I’m fine with being okay. And all the other things. In the dark it doesn’t matter.
.
.
.
.
.
I’ve been here.
For how long? (how long howlonghowlong)
I don’t know.
The thoughts aren’t as scattered anymore. Bits that seemed to float off into nothing before melded together.
The sounds have been here too.
Some of them have been different, but they always go away eventually.
The first sound never left.
I call it The Noise. It was right, somehow. (somehow?)
I don’t know if I could go back to silence again. What would happen then? Would I be alone?
Maybe I’d be okay, my thoughts would still be here.
...would they?
…
Something is happening.
The sounds are getting louder. And faster.
It’s the only thing I can hear.
what’s going on?
The thoughts are gone.
The sounds are gone.
….Too much. (Toomuchtoomuchtooomuc-)
The Noise is gone. (nonononononono)
…..
And
I
can’t
think.
I am not okay.
And everything was gone.
.
.
.
.
.
But then, all of a sudden it was back.
And there were other sounds. Different.
Louder.
But quieter than before. I think. Maybe.
And there was this strange gurgling….whatever it was it was very close.
The nothing was different. I don’t know how but it was not the same as before.
There were just dark and broken thoughts and Noise before.
But now?
It’s new.
Suddenly, there was something else. It wasn’t sound, it wasn’t anything I knew. What is it?
Whatever it was, it was everywhere. Everywhere at once. I couldn’t focus on anything but the feeling that was everywhere.
Feeling. Is that what this is? (Ooooh.)
I think it would stay, like the noise, but I don't really know.
Sometimes it gets stronger in one spot. It was odd.
But it was okay.
.
.
.
.
.
I can do something.
I don’t know what this something is. I don’t know how I know this.
But I can do something.
I know this.
I know a thing now. I like knowing things.
I know another thing, too.
Everything will change again if I do this “something”.
I don’t know how.
But everything will change.
My thoughts have questions.
Too many to understand.
But I think change will be….good? Somehow.
…
I feel something moving…
And everything changes.
.
.
.
.
.