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Language:
English
Series:
Part 3 of Forbidden Fruit
Stats:
Published:
2006-11-02
Completed:
2006-12-02
Words:
506
Chapters:
2/2
Kudos:
61
Bookmarks:
3
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3,822

Confessions

Summary:

Hermione and Severus are working through their feelings by writing each other letters, but will they send them?

Notes:

I was trying to get the last bits of Hermione & Severus' story to flow again after finishing up Forbidden Fruit, so I started writing drabbles. I figured that, at some point, Hermione was going to sit down with paper and quill and write Severus a letter - if only to work through her feelings. And, since I did one for Hermione, I figured I had better let Severus has his say as well. *sigh* This is the result.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: I will Remember You

Summary:

A year after he ended their affair, Hermione still has a few things that she needs to say to Severus, so she writes him a letter.

Chapter Text

Severus,

I can't forget you.

I said that I would remember you and I have. Of course, you wouldn't recall that would you? You would have probably thought that I was being selfish if you had heard me, but I didn't say it for myself; I said it for you.

You tried to hide your weakness from me, but I saw through the biting sarcasm. I know now that the rules were for your benefit, not mine. I know how vulnerable you were, how terrified you were of feeling anything. Without an exceptional task to sustain it, your bastion of self-control was crumbling around you. Who would have guessed you had grown so used to your double-life that once the war was over, once you no longer had a purpose, you would fall apart?

I loved you. There, I’ve said it. And in your cynical, emotionally twisted way I believe that you loved me too. So, no, it wasn't for my benefit that I said I would remember you; it was for yours. You needed someone to remember you as something other than the sarcastic, intimidating, former Death Eater, point-taking, bastard of a professor that you worked so hard at being. You needed someone to remember you because you had been wearing one mask or another for so long that you had forgotten what your true face looked like.

I wish that I could forget. I wish that I could forget your voice. I wish that I could forget the way you made me want you, the way you got inside of me and turned me inside out, the way you took control of me. I hate you for that. I hate you for making me your slave, and I hate you for setting me free because I can't forget the magic of your touch. A magic that had nothing to do with your being a wizard and everything to do with your being a man; a magic I haven't felt since you told me goodbye.

I hope you realise what you threw away. I hope that you're as miserable in your cold, dark dungeon, with only your books for company, as I am here with mine. I hope that the warm glow radiating from the fire in your sitting-room hearth only reminds you of how cold your heart is. But most of all, I hope that you will let me come back to you.

Hermione