Chapter Text
Nothing had changed. Nothing. I could see the mess sprawled out among the top of that aged desk, papers and books piled high, while some remained open with post-it notes plastered to the crumpled pages. Pens and highlighters were scattered about, as well, some missing tops and caps. Things were just as he had left it early that morning and it only seemed to bother me further. How many times had I advised for Nitori to straighten his mess, for it would prove to be a better studying and living environment for the two of us? At this point, I had lost count and reminding him had only become a pain. However, there was something about reminding my roommate that made my heart thump vigorously within my chest. Hearing him retort and urge that it made his material and notes more accessible could only make me laugh internally. There were nights when I could hear him whisper quietly to himself, asking himself where this and that might be. Often times, I would mutter answers from that bottom bunk of mine, only to find that I was right. It was moments like those that made me smile, even if it were only for a slight second.
Just as I had moved to trail my fingers idly over the very edge of his desk, the door to our room opened, Nitori standing there with a messenger bag over his shoulder. From the looks of it, he had just come from swim practice, which had ended nearly an hour ago. I knew, because I had been there too. I wasn't quite sure why he had decided to stay late, but I felt no need to ask, either. I simply gave a nod of acknowledgment and found myself wandering towards my bunk. Taking a seat there on the edge, I watched a smile creep onto my friend's face, his voice bright and cheerful when he spoke.
"Senpai!" he spouted rather quickly, dropping his bag just at the foot of his desk chair. "My time was faster today. It's all thanks to your help, too!"
I wasn't sure of how many times I had heard this, but now, I couldn't hide the fact that I felt proud. Of course, I would never mention it, but I could tell that Nitori was trying to catch up with me. . .to somehow reach the same level that I was on. At every practice, I could see that Nitori was trying to push himself, to better himself to become a better swimmer. That, in itself, was admiring and I could only give a toothy grin to his mentioned accomplishment. "Does that mean you can beat me now or what?" I asked, raising a fine brow. "Can you swim laps around me?"
"Of course not!" he wailed immediately, pale cheeks going a faint shade of pink. "There's no way I could do that. You're faster than the whole team!"
A snicker rose from my throat, a hand reaching out to nudge Nitori's shoulder. He responded with a laugh, the sound making my chest tense. At first, it was a puzzling feeling to me, but it was one I had felt before. . .on countless occasions, at that. I still didn't understand what it meant, but I felt as if I was coming to the sudden realization. For quite some time now Nitori and I had been roommates, and even though there had been some differences and difficulties at the start, things had slowly evened out and become more bearable...perhaps even fun. Was it all thanks to Nitori and his company? Possibly. "I'm sure a squirt like you can catch up with time. How about you work out with me more often? Maybe we can get your time up there and ahead of some of our other teammates? Does that sound good to you?" It was almost instant. . .his expression rippled with happiness, his eyes growing large and bright. I could see him tense up those shoulders, slender arms lifting into the air with pure joy.
"That'd be great! Anything with Matsuoka-senpai would be great!"
Hearing that, my own cheeks were steadily turning a shade of red, a stunned expression surely present on my face. There was no stopping it though. Nitori was one of the very few people who could have me feeling good, despite what situations might arise or ones that I might be reminded of. No matter what, he was always there for me and encouraging me, like a good friend should. Though, he felt like much more than a friend, someone who held a special significance in my life. That's when my realization sparked to life, the feeling causing my stomach to twist into a million knots. My fingers curled within the duvet on my bunk, the fabric creasing harshly within my hold. I was obviously struggling with myself and my emotions and I could hear Nitori faintly ask if something were wrong. I dismissed the question with a swift shake of my head, quickly moving to lay down against the mattress. My back turned to Nitori, almost like a wall separating us. It couldn't be. . .it couldn't be love. . .could it?