Work Text:
playboy: loki r u there
LOKI: STARK HOW DO I
LOKI: WHERE ARE SMALL LETTERS?
LOKI: STARK!
playboy: stop yelling
playboy: press caps lock
LOKI: WHICH ONE IS THAT?
playboy: never mind
playboy: soo, asl
LOKI: AMERICAN SIGN LANGUAGE?
LOKI: WHY ARE WE DOING THIS?
LOKI: WE'RE IN THE SAME BUILDING.
playboy: shut up, that's sexy
playboy: age sex location
playboy: and press the CAPS LOCK DAMMIT
LOKI: Look, I did it.
LOKI: Tell me sth nice.
playboy: i'm telling u sth nice
playboy: asl, come on
LOKI: You know my location and my sex.
LOKI: mmm
LOKI: And I'm older than you so stop
LOKI: treating me liek that.
LOKI: like
playboy: ugh
playboy: what r u wearing
LOKI: My armour, what else?
playboy: omfg
playboy: talk dirty, u know how to do that
LOKI: Fine, I'm wearing lacy panties.
playboy: there we go
playboy: what else
LOKI: Umm, a collar.
LOKI: Yes, a collar and
LOKI: I've been bad.
playboy: of course you have
playboy: u slut
playboy: what did u do
LOKI: I might have broken a bottle of that beverage of yours.
playboy: WHAT
playboy: DAMMIT LOKI
LOKI: When do we start pretending we're having sex?
playboy:
playboy: now, prolly
playboy: tell me how u touch urself
LOKI: I'm holding my cock
LOKI: and I'm slowly stroking myself.
playboy: finally
playboy: what else
LOKI: I tu
LOKI: g at my colalr
LOKI: colar
LOKI: collar.
playboy: u r useless
playboy: get on ur knees and suck my cock
LOKI: Fine.
LOKI: So I'm between your legs and open my mouth,
LOKI: take you in, inch by inch,
LOKI: as deep as I can.
LOKI: I suck hard and lick you.
playboy: now u r talking
LOKI: You know what we should do?
LOKI: Buy more fruity lube.
playboy: u just have to ruin everything
playboy: back to the blowjob
LOKI: I bob my head up and down,
LOKI: and up and down.
LOKI: I hum around you and moan.
LOKI: Are you really touching yourself now?
playboy: yeah & u not?
LOKI: How am i supposed to write with one hand?
LOKI: I'm not really aroused.
playboy: what if i slap ur ass
LOKI: In reality, maybe.
LOKI: I don't understand how this works.
playboy: use ur imagination
playboy: i put u over my knee and smack u hard
playboy: over and over again
playboy: till u beg me to stop
LOKI: You know I never beg.
playboy: fuck just focus
playboy: you asscheeks are bright red and hot
playboy: and i keep slapping u
playboy: r u hard now?
LOKI: I'm slightly interested.
playboy: in a moment i'm really gonna find u and smack u
playboy: u r always such a dirty fuckslut
playboy: and now u r ruining the mood
playboy: loki
playboy:
playboy:
playboy: u fucking slut, r u talking to sb else
playboy: LOKI
playboy: fucking whore
playboy: come back
LOKI: Stark, I'm totally trolling this guy.
LOKI: He thinks I'm a woman.
LOKI: Asked for pics of my tits
LOKI: and I told him they are round, booby-like.
LOKI: Lol.
LOKI: More than three.
playboy: what
LOKI: <3
playboy: u r whoring urself and all i get is some lame <3
LOKI: Xoxo.
LOKI: Swag.
playboy: stop
playboy: u don't know what that means
LOKI: XD.
LOKI: Ilu.
playboy: u r pissing me off
LOKI: Yolo.
LOKI: # Yolo.
LOKI: I want a Facebook.
LOKI: Whta is that?
LOKI: what
LOKI: How do I do that?
playboy: u really should NOT
playboy: can we please go back to
LOKI: Unf.
playboy:
LOKI: Bby.
LOKI: Ur my bby.
playboy: i dunno if should cry or laugh
LOKI: Gif.
LOKI: Jif.
playboy: fine, i'm gonna just finish this all by myself
LOKI: KOTL.
LOKI: Delish.
LOKI: Jn.
playboy: i'm ignoring u
LOKI: :D
playboy: fuck u
LOKI: You could but no, you had to force me to do this.
LOKI: Now suffer,
LOKI: dull mortal.
LOKI: Fyi this man is so much nicer than you.
LOKI: He doesn't insult me.
LOKI: What if I leave you for him?
LOKI: Have you thought about that?
playboy: you wouldn't
playboy: darling
LOKI: Oh, now it's darling, hmm?
playboy: jeez loki after everything i've done for u
LOKI: Name one thing.
playboy: u remember how i tied u to the bed
playboy: naked and whipped u real hard
playboy: and then fucked u till you screamed
playboy: wasn't that good
LOKI: Perhaps.
LOKI: Oh! You know what?
playboy: what
LOKI: We should invite that man here.
LOKI: What about a threesome?
playboy: oh, sweetheart
playboy: snowflake u can't have sex with strangers met online
LOKI: Why?
playboy: they are hideous old men, terribly perverted
LOKI: Is that so?
LOKI: Excuse me for a moment.
playboy: no, loki no!
playboy: i encouraged u, rite?
playboy: u'd let anyone fuck u
playboy:
LOKI: ><
LOKI: >,<
LOKI: >.>
LOKI: >//<
playboy: no, it's ok, don't mind me
LOKI: >3
LOKI: Look, Stark.
LOKI: It means evil but happy.
LOKI: I'm evil but happy.
LOKI: >3
playboy: u r just loki
LOKI: Tell me you love me.
playboy: u know i do
LOKI: The whole sentence, now.
playboy: i love u
playboy: r ass
LOKI: I hate you.
playboy: ayy lmao
LOKI:
LOKI: Asdfghjkl.
LOKI: I can't.
LOKI: I'm so done
LOKI: with your shit.
playboy: u don't even know what u r saying
LOKI: I'm more intelligent than you.
LOKI: I'm blending in,
LOKI: learning the jargon of the youth.
LOKI: Who's stupid now?
LOKI: You're so short-sighted.
playboy: hmm
LOKI: Can u not?
playboy: i think i can
playboy: this is a disaster
playboy: i'm going to the bedroom
playboy: join me
playboy: bitch
LOKI: Tony?
playboy: yes?
LOKI: What is Tumbler?
playboy has disconnected.