Chapter Text
Levi waited outside Mr Smith's (the principal of this hell they call a school, no sorry Academy, because fuck if is school wasn't pretentious enough) office.
Levi looked over to the student next to him, 'he looks constipated' thought Levi. 'I wonder how long it's been since he'd last taken a shit. Can horses even get constipated?' Levi's pondering of the two toned centaur was cut short by the chaste "come in" of their principal.
The two punks walked into the office like prisoners waiting for execution. Principal Brows pursed his lips, a disappointed look in his eyes. "Levi, Jean" Oh so the horsefaces name is Jean, well not like Levi cared that much to begin with. "This is the third time you two have been in my office for fighting, what do you have to say for yourselves?" What a fucking rhetorical question 'what do you have to say for yourselves?' well what do you think fuck face? Nothing I'm going to say to you will fucking help, if anything you'll twist and manipulate my words in the that perverted ass blonde head of yours.
"Well what the fuck do you think, Eyebrows?" Levi decided to voice his thought process out loud. All Levi got for an answer was a scolding look and a "language Levi" which honestly annoyed Levi more than it should have.
"I-I'm sorry sir, we didn't mean for it to happen!" two-tone sputtered unintelligibly.
Erwin gave an inaudible sigh, seemingly done with the two students in front of him. "You do realize what happens after this, right?" Jean looked terrified, Levi looked bored. "N-No sir." From the stuttering brat next to him and a exasperated eye roll from himself were Captain Americas answer. "One more fight and you two will be in for suspension." He said firmly. Sure eyebrows. Between my skill in sports and my intelligence, I'm sure you'll suspend your best student and make the school look bad. Sure.
"NO! I-I can't get suspended! My mom will kill me!" Jean suddenly shouted gripping his ridiculous haircut. "Well" Erwin gave Jean that infuriating, almost mocking, little smile "looks like a good reason to stop fighting then."
Levi sighed just wanting to go home and clean something. "What's our punishment, eyebrows?" He gave Levi that same smile. "Three hours of your service with a smile, and three weeks of detention." Levi groaned internally, fuck this, fuck all of this. "Can we go now, fuck face?"
He gave another one of those blood boiling smiles. He ignored the insult."Language Levi, and yes, Jean can go, but Levi," Erwin's gaze suddenly turned hard "I need to speak with you." Levi glared in return as he unceremoniously plopped down in one of the leather chairs.
After Jean left Erwin took off his glasses and gave Levi a long exasperated and tired stare which Levi returned with his infamous, chronic, bitch face.
After a long few minutes Erwin look away with a sigh, but his gaze quickly snapped back to Levi. ‘Oh here we go.’ thought said raven sarcastically. "Mr. Ackerman, in the past three months you have been convicted of vandalism of school property, fighting with students, disrespect of teachers and peers, truancy, smoking, and a plethora of other things, you can't do this Levi, how are you going to survive in the real world, you can't go into a job with this kind of attitude. . ."
'And blah blah, blah' thought Levi bitterly 'damn, just shut the hell up already.' At this point he had engaged his selective hearing tuning out his Principal. Doing this he noticed that they were not the only occupants of the medium office space, looking over his breath caught in his throat. Sitting on top of the half bookshelf that was placed under the window was a boy around his age playing with the Newton's Cradle next to him, and Ho-ly shit that boy was hot.
He was wearing the Legion Academy's typical get-up, a white button up with a forest green sweater-vest, which featured the overlapping 'Wings of Freedom' logo, and the same green-colored pants, but somehow the kid just made it look hotter. The clothes were baggy but fitted his slender form nicely, accentuating his hips and waist, but the clothes still had that laid back, 'I didn't really try to hard', baggy look. From what he could tell by the side of his face he had boyish features, golden tanned skin, and a cute button nose to boot. He also had soft, thick, chocolatey locks that looked like they hadn't seen a brush in ages. The brat had that mixture of cute and sexy that made Levi squirm.
Levi was snapped out of his ogling when the boys head snapped up to meet his gaze and holy shit. . his eyes. The right one was a beautiful amber color 'like sunlight shining through honey' Levi thought wistfully and complexly out of character. The left was a fascinating blue-green color, 'like the ocean' he thought in his daze. Clearly this kid had somehow broken his brain if he was thinking like a girl.
The brat smiled which when mixed with the halo-like effect from the sun made him look like an angel. "Gorgeous." Levi mumbled unconsciously, not realizing he had spoken aloud.
"What was that?" Erwin suddenly snapped. "Er . . . nothing?" was the ever so intelligent answer.
Erwin's gaze hardened. He looked from the brown haired beauty to Levi easily piecing together Levi's thought process.
"Eren?" he asked.
"Yes?" was the beautiful brats reply. 'Oh so the brats got a name, well at least I know what I should be moaning on those particularly lonely nights.' That Levi can guarantee are going to be more frequent.
"Head off to your next class for papa, ok?" 'Wait, Papa?'
The brat looked confusedly at his 'papa' for a moment before shrugging if off and starting to his next class.
He gave Erwin a quick hug and a wave before exiting, but not before giving an angelic smile to Levi, which made Erwin's grip around his mug tighten, and a "Oh and Erwin, your parental-complex is showing again."
Levi watched the brat leave, totally not staring at the two perfect mounds of sexy, squeezable, fleshy, goodness, also known as Eren's ass, nope, nuh-uh, not him.
As soon as the door closed Erwin opened his annoying mouth."Stay away from Eren."
Levi cocked his brow.
"I mean it Levi, Eren will not be tainted by you."
"Wow, Eren's right, you do have a parental-complex."
"Stay away."
"Yeah yeah whatever, can I go now?"
"Hands to yourself, Levi" was Erwin's last warning before he ushered Levi out the door.
Levi smirked as he walked down the hall to Math. 'Oh Erwin, when have I ever listened to you?' There was just the small problem of the brat apparently being that goddamned bastards kid. Bit Levi wasn't worried. He'd fix it. Somehow.