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‘So what are you guys looking for?’ the shop assistant asks, her wide smile showing her too white teeth. She seems overly happy, one of those eager businesswoman types. Next to her, Kurt and Blaine just feel like some very irresponsible teenagers.
‘Well, we were, looking for something…nice?’ Blaine starts, shrugging his shoulders at Kurt. He really doesn’t know what they’re looking for. A bed is a bed, isn’t it?
‘Both a frame and a mattress,’ Kurt says, cutting in. ‘Inexpensive but modern,’ besides him, Blaine sighs in relief, letting Kurt doing the talking. Blaine doesn’t really give a shit about what they sleep on as long as it’s the right height.
‘Okay, If you’ll follow me I’ll show you what we have,’ the lady smiles again, walking round the shop.
‘Oh, and storage,’ Kurt adds, smiling. ‘Some drawers or compartments underneath would be good.’
‘Storage?’ Blaine asks, a puzzled look on his face. ‘Kurt, we’ve got tons of space now and-‘
‘Trust me,’ Kurt says, arching his eyebrows at Blaine giving him a mischievous wink.
Moments later they arrive in front of some pristine bed frames and mattresses, all with rather daunting price tags attached to them.
‘Well, these are the most modern frames we do here, unless you were looking for something a little different?’ The lady says. Kim, Kurt notices her name tag says.
‘These look good,’ Kurt smiles. ‘Thank you. Could we just take our time looking at them?’
‘Of course,’ Kim smiles. Again. Honestly, the smile’s scaring Blaine now. ‘If you’ve got any questions I’ll be right over here!’ She goes to help some other customers, leaving Kurt and Blaine on their own.
‘Kurt these are so expensive,’ Blaine whispers once Kim’s out of earshot. Can we really afford these?’
Kurt glares at him. ‘Really Blaine, we wouldn’t have to if you hadn’t tried to do that impossible position.’
‘Sorry,’ Blaine stutters, blushing red. ‘It was worth a try though? I mean, I didn’t even know you could bend like that.’
‘Neither could I,’ Kurt laughs, giving Blaine a kiss before starting to prod the mattresses. ‘Hey, what about this one?’ He asks a few minutes later, catching Blaine’s attention. Kurt’s standing next to a quite high bed frame, similar to the one they used to have, maybe a bit higher. There are certainly lots of compartments for storage under it.
‘That looks nice,’ Blaine smiles. ‘Are you sure we really need that much storage though?’
‘Blaine,’ Kurt begins, a glint of humour in his eye. ‘The more storage, the higher the frame is.’
‘And why would that-oh.’ Blaine says, staring at the bed. ‘Kurt, you are a genius.’
Kurt smiles and begins checking out the bed.
‘Yeah, I’d say this frame is perfect,’ Kurt finally says, standing back to view it from a distance. ‘The colour’s pretty good too.’
‘Yeah,’ Blaine smiles. ‘You sure you want dark wood though? I mean, we could go white like the wallpaper.’
‘Impractical. Think of the stains.’ Kurt says.
After reconsidering, Blaine has to hand it to Kurt. He certainly knows what they’re looking for.
After they look at the price, then try not to think about the price, Blaine can’t hold the question in any more.
‘Do you think it’s the right height?’
‘It should be.’ Kurt looks around, checking no one can hear them. They’re good, this part of the shop is almost deserted.
‘Should we- should we check?’
Kurt check’s they’re safe once more, and then tentatively walks towards the side of the mattress. He nudges his head at Blaine. ‘Okay, get on,’ he whispers.
Blaine grins before flopping his front half down on the bed, so that his waist is on the very edge of the mattress.
‘At least pretend to be feeling it or something!’ Kurt says, trying not to laugh as Blaine starts stabbing a finger in the white memory foam, the goofiest look Kurt has ever seen on his face.
Kurt tries to walk subtly towards Blaine, stopping right behind him so that his crotch lines up right behind Blaine’s ass. It’s difficult to tell if it would be the right height though, Blaine’s wearing a big oversized hoodie and it completely covers his bum.
‘Is that aright?’ Kurt asks, the fear of being caught suddenly seeming hilarious.
‘Errm, move around a bit? I can’t really feel,’ Blaine whispers, now stoking the mattress, desperate for any way not to look like they were planning out their sex life in the middle of a bed and mattress store.
Kurt shifts his weight slightly, subtly rolling his hips into Blaine.
‘Is that your asshole?’
‘I think so? Poke it, see,’ invites Blaine.
Kurt does so, and when Blaine automatically cringes, a shiver running up his spine, Kurt knows he’s hit the right spot.
‘Okay, we’re done,’ Kurt says, laughing at how Blaine is now spanking the mattress just like he sometimes does to Kurt’s ass. ‘You stay here; I’ll go find a store attendant.’
It takes ages to find an attendant, the shop is so big, but eventually, Kurt finds a cute, innocent looking assistant called Mark, and Kurt can’t help wondering what his reaction will be when he says Kurt’s shopping with another guy. Smiling to himself, Kurt turns the corner, greeted with the sight of the bed they’ve chosen and Blaine.
Only Blaine is very asleep and still very bent over the mattress.
‘Ohmygod’ is all Kurt can think, as the shop assistant starts looking at Kurt for an explanation.
‘He’s very tired?’ Kurt asks, rushing forward to shake Blaine’s shoulder, waking him up.
‘I-I can see,’ Mark says, the fact that there’s a gay couple and the fact that someone just fell asleep in his store, in a position ready to take it up the ass. ‘Does he normally do this?’
‘Oh yes,’ Kurt smiles, hoping to brush it off. ‘He does this all the time!’
Inwardly he curses as he realises what he’s just said.
Thankfully, Blaine wakes, climbing to his feel and mumbling about ‘checking out how soft it was but not wanting to lie about it.’
‘Oh, so you weren’t’ even asleep, were you?’ Kurt asks, trying not to laugh as Blaine replies with, ‘No!, not at all!’
‘So are you guys done?’ Mark says, noting down the numbers of the bed and mattress. ‘Definitely both of these?’
‘I think so,’ Kurt smiles. ‘Is this mattress too soft or too firm Blaine?’
Blaine pats it one last time. ‘You know Kurt, it really is firmer than our last one, but I think I might like it hard.’
Trying to withhold they’re giggles, they finally pay, arranging for the bed and mattress to be delivered later that evening.
