Archive of Our Own

It wasn't that long ago that Frank Sullivan was certain of several things: Julia was a saint and he did not deserve her, Elvis was one of the greatest singers who ever lived, and as a Bayside boy he would be a proud fan of the Amazin's until the day he died. There were a lot of other things he'd thought he was certain of too, but his world view had taken a pretty big shaking of late and he'd pretty much had to rethink nearly all of the rest of them.

Like time. It went one way, right? You were born, you lived, you loved, you died. That was the just way it worked. End of story. Except now… well, he found out that wasn't always the case. Thanks to the aurora borealis he'd had a glimpse of the future and, more importantly, a chance to change it.

That night, a man claiming to be his Little Chief all grown up told Frank he was going to die if he didn't find a different way out of the Buxton warehouse. Then the next day there was a fire there and he got trapped in it. He hadn't thought about it much, how significantly he would alter things, when he ignored his instincts and stopped to reassess because he'd gotten that warning. If he hadn't wasted that extra second to do so and went with his initial reading of the situation, he'd never have noticed the way the fire was licking across the floor, eating it away from underneath, and wouldn't have turned right and discovered the slide and a quick way out of the building. He was alive, the runaway he'd rescued was alive, and that was all that mattered in that moment.

It wasn't until later, when he heard that broken tone John used when he explained that Julia had died when he was young, that it really hit him. Somehow, something they'd done had altered things and taken his beautiful angel from the world and away from his little boy. That little decision, between turning right or left, had affected the world as a whole and it didn't just save him and the girl, but somehow rewrote everything important to him and to his boy in the process.

His responsibility for Julia's death wasn't the only thing that haunted him. Six other women had died because he lived. He tried to do everything he could to set that right. He saved Carrie Reynolds but then failed when he'd tried to do the same for Sissy Clark and that was when everything started to really spin out of control. Satch brought him in for questioning about Sissy's murder; Jack Shepard showed up and would have killed him in the interview room if Phil hadn't interrupted him; and then Frank had to fake a fire to get out of there before Shepard could try again.

Things kept hitting him, one after another. The fight in Shepard's apartment was brutal and he barely escaped it. The one that followed was even worse, but at least he'd thought he'd won that one. Only it turned out he hadn't, because when he was talking with John over the radio a bit later, he was interrupted by Shepard attacking him at the same time something was happening to John in the future. The next thing he knew, Julia was in danger again and not even a minute after that, little Johnny was dangling in that asshole's grip, scared out of his mind.

Then the absolute worst thing of all happened, he heard Shepard's voice threaten John over the radio: "Time to die, soldier."

Frank did what he could in the moment and while his Shepard was distracted by both the radio and Julia's jump he managed to get the shotgun up and was in time to blast Shepard's hand right off when the man tried to attack him. In the chaos that followed the bastard somehow managed to get away and then time spooled out in front of him and split.

Time spools out in front of him and splits….

He hears a gunshot over the radio followed by a self satisfied, horrible laugh. "Who's stealing whose life away now, pal?"

He hears the cocking of a shotgun, his shotgun, right before it fires. There's a moment of silence before his own voice echoes through, "I'm still here, Chief."

And that's when he knows, when he knew, he has a future he needs to get to, and what he does now, and for every day until October 16th, 1998, is going to matter. It has to. There's a future out there where he saves his son and one where he doesn't. He didn't let that bastard get the better of him now and he sure as hell isn't going to let him win later on.

Frank isn't sure what he should do. The radio hasn't made a peep since those last two contradictory messages. The aurora borealis, the thing that somehow enabled them to talk to each other, is over and there's nothing Frank can do about it. He doesn't know what he should tell Julia or Johnny, if anything at all. If he tries to warn Johnny will he wind up altering the future even more? Is it possible that something he, Julia, or Johnny, will do between now and 1998 can change what happened from happening? Will he wind up creating a future where John doesn't fire up the radio that fateful day and everything Frank's just lived through gets rewritten?

It's a constant struggle, trying to figure out what to do. Satch believes him now, understands and accepts his fanciful story about a magic ham radio; Satch is a realist and while Frank's story may have seemed more science fiction than anything else when he first told it, the facts back it up. The whole shoe polish incident. The discovery of Shepard's trophies. The attack in the house. And so on and so forth. There's not much Satch can do to dispute any of those events so he accepts them as evidence that what Frank had been telling him is real, which means at least Frank's not alone in this mess anymore.

"Okay, so walk me through it," Satch says over beers a week or so later. They're meeting to try to gather together everything that they'll need to know to make sure their 1998 winds up being as similar to the version John lived through as they can. If too much is changed then his future might end up different enough that everything they just went through might not happen again. Frank can't risk that happening.

"What'd'ya mean?"

"John, future John, not Johnny John." Satch pauses and shakes his head before pulling a pack of smokes out of his pocket.

"Let's just call that John 'John' and the one sleeping upstairs 'Johnny'," Frank suggests before leaning over and grabbing the cigarettes right out of Satch's hand. "And no more smoking. Apparently they're bad for you and cause cancer or some shit. He said you were around for him in 1998, at least in a few of the different whatchacallit, timelines, when we talked about it, but we gotta stack the deck as much as we can so no more smoking for either of us."

Satch doesn't look happy about it, but he accepts it and nods. "Okay, so let's start with the radio. Did John talk about it? If he did, was there anything he specifically mentioned about it?"

"It was the same one." Frank stops and thinks about it. "And he didn't seem to feel comfortable on it. I remember him saying something about no one using them anymore."

"That's good, that's good. What else?"

"I think," Frank grinds out slowly, because what he's about to admit is hard and not really something he ever wanted to think about, "in that first timeline after... I died Julia packed the radio away and it was just sheer dumb luck he unpacked it and set it up that day. It was all so random, Satch, what if—"

"Don't go there, Frank. He saved you; he helped us save Julia and all those other women Shepard would have killed. Now we're going to save him. You have to believe that."

He does. He has no other choice because the alternative is not something he can accept.

They know John has to have the radio set up in the house - Frank's house now, but what will be John's house then - on the eleventh of October, 1998 so he can receive that first message. Radios are fickle, delicate things, and they're made up of a lot of parts that can break and connections that can either fray or fry which makes ensuring that more than a little difficult. John not only has to have the radio, but it's got to work and the antenna needs to be functioning too. After mulling it over for a bit, they decide that Frank should use the radio enough so Johnny's familiar with it, then pack it away to make sure it's in decent enough shape it'll be usable when the time comes.

They're careful with spreading what they know. Instead of being a cop Satch should have become a boxer; the way he's able to bob and weave around the truth like a master whenever anyone asks him to explain what all went down. Needless to say, Julia's the only one who ever hears anything even remotely resembling the truth. She knows about the man named John on the radio that Frank had been talking to, but while Satch had technically told her everything in that diner, she never brings it up to either of them so they just let that sleeping dog lie. If anything changes and she asks… well, they'll deal with that then.

It's a hard decision, but he and Satch decide to let Johnny grow up without telling him what'll happen in 1998. It's too much to put on the kid and they figure if Johnny's expecting it and planning for it then it might change that first conversation between John and Frank too much.

There's a lot they still don't know. They can't even begin to guess what kind of different path Johnny's life will take if he doesn't lose a parent at an early age, but they have to hope it'll be unchanged enough he can start everything in motion again in twenty-nine year's time. They do what they can to make sure they're still for him then. Step one is quitting smoking (they also try to encourage friends and loved ones to quit, not always successfully, but they figure the attempt is worth it.) Step two is making sure they keep themselves fit. Being a firefighter always meant having people's lives in his hands. He's always taken the job seriously and kept himself in decent enough shape, but now he has make sure he's still around in thirty years and healthy enough to take on Shepard if he needs to, so Frank starts working out more and drinking less.

Satch keeps him posted on the search for Shepard. Neither of them is surprised when the both the investigation and APB turn up nothing. Shepard's gone to ground, but he'll get his eventually. Frank's going to see to that.

The years go by.

When Johnny blows his arm out his senior year, just like John had said he would, Frank feels something unclench in him, despite the worry and concern and how hard it is to see his kid in pain. They're still on the right track.

He makes the appropriate noises when Johnny comes and tells him he'll be following in Satch's footsteps and becoming a cop, the same way John had done. "Really, Chief? A cop? You're supposed to be a third generation firefighter! What are you doing to me, kid?" he moans. It's for show, but it's necessary since there's no way Johnny's not expecting him to bitch and complain. It feels like a win though and when he hugs Johnny tight he catches Satch's eye and they share a grin.

As the '80s inch their way to the '90s his son (who insists on being called John now) becomes serious with a girl named Samantha and when they announce their engagement Frank is thrilled… but worried. He distinctly remembers John saying he hasn't gotten married and while Frank hadn't specifically asked, he remembers thinking it sounded like John not only wasn't married at the time, but that he never had been either. There are a few sleepless nights that follow, but it's not like Frank is going to begrudge his son his happiness over the possibility that he's messing up a predestined, yet changing and changeable, future by having a life above and beyond the shield.

Once 1998 approaches he and Satch start up their planning sessions again.

"I still don't see why I can't just be staking out the house and arrest him before he even attacks John," Satch complains for the tenth time in as many meetings.

"Because the Shepard in 1969 needs to be distracted by the Shepard in 1998 or we'll change things and who knows what'll happen then?" Frank reminds him, also for the tenth time.

"So I hide in the closet and wait until after he threatens John and then come out and arrest him."

"Satch, it has to be me. You know this!"

"But—"

"But, nothing. I heard everything that happened and I didn't hear you. It was either me or…." he drifts off, neither willing or able to give voice to what the other option was or what it means might happen.

"Yeah but, Frank, think about it. You do this and you have to be the one hiding. You need to be there, waiting, not doing a thing while he's beating on your boy, on your Little Chief. Do you really think you can do that?"

Frank just looks at him. "I gotta, Satch. What choice do I have?"

And that's the kicker, isn't it? Because, if everything happens the way they think and hope it will, then there's two possible outcomes. Either Shepard kills John or Frank swoops in at the very last moment to save him. That's it. A or B. Take it or leave it.

They do what they can to set events in motion and then… sit back and wait.

It's hard. It is so fucking hard, but as October ramps up he and Satch play their parts so well they should be put up for an Oscar. The body, the first Nightingale victim, is discovered and when Satch calls to tell him he can't quite keep the tension out of his voice. They've been waiting, preparing, for this for years. It has to go right. It just has to.

The days seem to go far too fast and way too slow all at the same time.

Then Frank blinks, and it's the sixteenth and he feels like he can hardly breathe.

Since they can't even begin to guess how long Shepard might watch the house before attacking John, the decision is made that Frank will sneak in when it's still light. A few hours later, just after dusk, Satch and a handful of his more trustworthy fellow cops will meet up at a bar a few blocks away. It's surprisingly easy to get the help, Satch just spins them a story about a possible threat on John's life and they're all eager to offer their assistance.

So Frank waits.

There's the familiar sound of the jingling of the keys as John unlocks the door before the crackle of the radio begins and then Frank's hit with the weird disconnect of hearing his own voice come through, "John, are you there? John, I'm back. John, are you there?" and it's all he can do to not run out there because he knows there's less than a minute before that asshole is going to attack his boy, but he can't interfere. He needs to let it all play out no matter how hard it's going to be to overhear. Gripping the shotgun, he bites his tongue and waits.

Both fights follow - John's here and now and his back then - and the anticipation is killing him but he doesn't have a choice. Then he hears it.

"Time to die, soldier."

He steps out of the closet.

His own voice echoes over the radio, "Run, Johnny, run!"

A shotgun blasts in the past.

Shepard, leaning over John, freezes, staring in horror as his hand melts away.

Time seems to stop before snapping into place.

Time seemed to stop and snapped into place as Frank cocked the gun and Shepard looked up, momentarily distracted by the sound. It was only for a second, but a second was all Frank needed to blow that asshole away and then Shepard was dead.

He did it.

John turned, shock and relief on his face when he realized it was his dad who saved him, and Frank thought the hug that followed was probably the best he'd ever had in his life. One last thing to do and it would all be over.

"I'm still here, Chief."

An unknown future beckoned. Frank was no longer sure what lay ahead for them but, hugging his son, he realized he was fine with that.