Chapter Text
Thomas (on screen): What is paranoid and purple and black all round? My anxiety!
Virgil (off-screen): HEY!
(Title sequence)
Thomas (close to the camera): What is up everybody?!
Thomas: So I have this show coming up in a few months. It’s still a long way ahead but rehearsels have already started and it’s been going great! Really so… freaking great…
Roman (rising up screen, with a concern smile): Why, Thomas, do you sound like you’re regreting the decision to be on a theather production?
Thomas: I’m not! You’re my fanciful side, Roman, you know how much I love acting.
Roman (one hand on his chin as his smile turns into a nostalgic one): Yes, the stage is where I shine the most…
Roman (back to concern): Still, there’s something wrong, really really wrong here!
Thomas (shrugging): I just-
Virgil (already on screen and trying to shrink himself into his corner): It’s such a big production, very Broadway like, it’s gonna be Bizardvaark but even worse…
Logan (rising up screen, one hand fixing his glasses): It would make sense that Virgil is concern. This show does strike me as more extragant than any of the ones Thomas has been in before.
Thomas: And I got the lead role!
Patton (popping up screen): That sounds like an awesome opportunity, kiddo!
Roman: It is! It’s another one of our dreams coming true, Thomas.
Thomas (pretty close to biting his own nails): But there are so many things that could go wrong!
Virgil (pulling the his coats hood over his face to cover it): He could trip on his own feet with those long costumes he’s not used to wearing and break something, or forget the lyrics and choke on stage, he could accidently bump into the other cast member’s in the middle of the performance, or-
Logan: Why are you worrying about this in such an advance? The show’s not for another four months.
(Thomas leans in closer, interested. As does Roman.)
Virgil (avoiding anyone’s gaze): Look, I swear I’m not doing this on purpose. I know I usually make Thomas worry about these type of things but not this far ahead, I know when I should pop up or duck out.
Patton: But if it isn’t you, who is it behind that nervousness?
Virgil (with trembling low voice): I don’t know!
Logan: I believe we could investigate that at a later time, seeing as Thomas’ currently rocking back and fourth on his couch.
(Cut scene to Thomas on the couch, curled up in a ball and rocking back and fourth)
Thomas (crying out): I’M FREAKING OUT!
Roman (with one raised eyebrow and dropped shoulders): Well this seems worse than I had anticipated.
Patton (looking at Logan): WHAT SHOULD WE DO?
Logan (gesturing with his hands): First, Patton, you need calm down. You’re Thomas’ feelings and he has enough of those right now.
Patton (nodding with his head down): You’re right, Logan. As always.
Roman: And second?
Logan (staring at Virgil): You’re really picturing all that could go wrong in this show, everything?
Virgil: every. little. detail.
Roman (raising his voice): THEN STOP IT, YOU ANGSTY QUARTER OF A HUMAN!
(Virgil is taken aback by the comment, as Logan stares at Roman with surprise but they’re both quiet)
Patton (sending sideway glance to Roman): Roman, you know I love you but scream like that again at my son and you’re dead to me.
Roman (making conflicted faces): Ugh- I- What- I just meant that he should think of other things! If he keeps making up these scenarios in his head, he’ll never calm down.
Logan (pointing at Roman and looking at Virgil): Although he could’ve phrased that better, he does have a point there.
Virgil (actually trembling): I DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT!
Patton: Of course you do, kiddo! You just have to beleaf in yourself!
Logan (with a hand on his forehead): Not the time for your puns, Patton.
Patton (with a sad smile): But puns make everything butter!
Virgil (pulling his head slightly up and to Logan’s side): I appreciate you trying, Patton. But maybe some other time…
Patton (really smiling): Well the fact that this is the first time you’ve looked at anyone since entering this conversation tell me my puns have worked their magic!
Thomas (near the camera now, actually biting his nails now): Uh, guys, what’s this conversation about now?
Roman (snapping his head at him): Thomas, you’re back! (Notices his nail biting) Well, almost.
Logan: The topic hasn’t changed Thomas, just took a brief detour. Now we’re back on track, aren’t we?
Patton: Absopattively!
Logan: That’s no- That’s not a word, and you know that very well.
Patton (hands on hips): I know that I know nothing.
Logan: Why are you quoting Socrates righ- WAIT WE’RE GOING OFF TRACK AGAIN. (snapping head at Thomas before turning to Virgil) You two listen to me, I am the only one here who can racionalize all this! First, Virgil, thinking about all that could possibly go wrong is useless. Thomas has exacly sixteen weeks of rehearsals before the show actually gets be seen by anyone. He’ll have a lot of time to get all his marks, lines, and lyrics right in his head. And things do tend to go wrong even on stage, and that doesn’t happen only with Thomas. He’s not an exception to the rule and neither in anyone else on the cast. That’s why there’s this thing called improvisation.
Virgil (finally properly looking up): Well, that’s true but uh…
Roman (clasping his fingers together in Virgil’s direction): BUT NOTHING, DUCK OUT BOY! You will worry about things going wrong when they actually go wrong, I WANT TO ENJOY THIS!
Patton: Roman, be more gentle.
Roman (defeated face): I’m sorry, Virg, but this is important to me!
Virgil (scratching his head): No, I get it. You’re Thomas’ dreams after all. I’ll try to keep the paranoia to a minium.
(Roman smiles softly)
Roman: THANK YOU!
Patton: Awwn my sons made peace. (With squeaky voice) I’M SO HAPPY! Logan (side eyeing Patton before turning back to Thomas): And you- Thomas. When you feel the paranoia coming back, remind yourself of all of this (gesturing around him). And just breathe slowly. Remind yourself you’ve done the best you could.
Patton (smiling and teasing): Is it just me or is Logan unusually kind today?
Logan (throwing hands in the air before letting them fall again): I was feeling the mood but now you ruined it.
Thomas: Wow, Logan… (Logan stares at Thomas with mean face) I mean, Patton’s right you’ve been unsually kind to me today! With your words at least. But I appreciate it a lot, really. Thanks, buddy.
(Logan gives a tiny smile as Patton looks at everyone with The Proud Dad Face)
Thomas: I know very well that that nervoussness won’t just stop here and that I’ll have to face it many times before I feel confident enough but you guys helped a lot. All of you. I’m really lucky to have this. Thank you.
Logan: Ah well, we’ll see how that all goes. (sinking out)
Roman: Aaaaaaaand he’s back to being the killjoy we all love. (sinking out).
Logan (off-screen): I heard that!
Roman (off-screen): It’s a compliment!
Patton (making finger guns at Roman’s empty spot): Well I don’t know how that’s a compliment but I love Logan either way! (Looking at Virgil) You’re going to be okay, kiddo. (Now at Thomas) And you too. (sinking out).
(Virgil nods and smiles while Thomas speaks.)
Thomas: Thanks, Patton! So, Virg, we have a lot to work on huh?
Virgil (hand on his neck): I… uh I guess so. I feel like i should… I should apologize for all the paranoia.
Thomas (smiling): Something tells me it wasn’t your fault, Virg.
Virgil: Being me or not… it still affected you pretty bad.
Thomas: Was- Was it so bad?
Virgil (making skkkk sound): Kinda, yeah.
Thomas (gesturing around): Well fine, we can overcome that, anyway!
Virgil: … sure. See you later, Thomas. (sinking out)
Thomas: DON’T UNDERESTIMATE US, VIRG!
Thomas (to the camera): Suffering with anticipation can’t be something I’m the only one who’s gone or is going through it. It can be really hard to step back and think that the things you are so worried about are still far away into your future because it doesn’t feel so far away for you. But I’ll take Logan’s advice. We have to remember we’re doing the best we can and remember to breath slowly. In the end, you just have to make sure you can be proud of yourself and what you’ve achieved.
Thomas: And that’s it for today’s video. I hope you guys enjoyed this and maybe learned a thing or two along the way. Take it easy guys, gals and nonbinary pals. PEACE OUT!
(End card)
Logan (to the other sides): Am I really so bad with my wording?
Virgil: Yeah…
Patton: Sometimes… only once in a while, you can be a little bit tactless…
Roman: Sometimes, once every day, you’re blantly insulting us.
Logan: Oh… I- Is that so… I am so very sorry. I will try to make amends to all of you.
Patton: I know I was teasing before this but… has Logan really changed?
Roman: It seems possible…
Virgil: It’s gonna be weird having nice Logan around.
Logan: Well then I’ll just turn back into mean Logan, if that’s what you really want.
All the other sides together: NO, no, no-