Work Text:
ITSWADE- Wade
Pineapplelicker- JP
HOI- Gar
Saltmachine2000- Pat
Pineapplelicker renamed the chat to SODA CHALLENGE LADSSSS
Pineapplelicker: Today fellow soldiers. We are going to war against the sin of our country
ITSWADE: Oh what the f is this
HOI: We are going to war. God Wade can’t you read
ITSWADE: You know what I mean. Pat you understand right????
Saltmachine2000: no I don’t. it is obviously war
ITSWADE: Patrck…
Pineapplelicker: ENOUGHHHHH! Now….the war
HOI: Yes JPar the war
Saltmachine2000: when and where bois
Pineapplelicker: wades house, cause ya know, that’s when we are seeing each other next
Pineapplelicker: and someday next week, idk like Wednesday or something
HOI: sounds good. I’m up for it
ITSWADE: what if I don’t want the challenge in my house?!
Saltmachine2000: we don’t care
ITSWADE: Patrck…
ITSWADE: WAIT!!!!
HOI: waiting
ITSWADE: why is it the soda challenge?!1?! Where did THAT come from?!1?!
Saltmachine2000: that’s a very good question. JP?
Pineapplelicker: isn’t it obvious
HOI: no. care to enlighten us?
Pineapplelicker: welllll when we played human flat fall together at like 3am. Pat left 2 get a soda then wade went 2 get buffalo wings cause he was hangry
Pineapplelicker: and gar and I talked about how they would be an odd mix and we should try a combo. Which led 2 this
Pineapplelicker: wasn’t that obvious?
~ITSWADE is typing~
~HOI is typing~
~Saltmachine2000 is typing~
Pineapplelicker: guys?
ITSWADE: PAT AND I WERENT EVEN THERE HOW WAS THAT MEANT TO BE OBVIOUS
Saltmachine2000: YOU WANT TO SUBJECT US 2 DISGUSTING FLAVOURS BASED OFF A COVERSATION YOU AND GAR HAD AT 3AM
HOI: I DIDN’T MEAN WE SHOULD TRY ITTTTT!!!!!
Pineapplelicker: so… I am sensing some frustration…
Pineapplelicker: lets go around the circle and discuss our problems. Ill start
Pineapplelicker: hi my name is jp, im 19 and I never learned how to read
ITSWADE: hi my name is wade and my only problem is that im friends with that said 19 year old
Saltmachine2000: hi my name is potrick and it’s a terrible idea
HOI: potrick
Pineapplelicker: potrick
ITSWADE:…potrick
Saltmachine2000: my other problem is that I ducking hate you all
Saltmachine2000: *sucking
Saltmachine2000: fuck me *cucking
Saltmachine2000: EJCHUMEMCEHCEYVBCJHD I HATE EVERYTHING
HOI: …
Pineapplelicker: ...
ITSWADE: I think we just witnessed the break down of a man
Pineapplelicker: so its settled we are doing the soda challenge next week
ITSWADE: what if you throw up
Saltmachine2000: with me that’s a high possibility as im fussy af
Pineapplelicker: guys, guys, guys it wont be that bad that we throw up. That’s ridiculous
HOI: and if you do just do it for the views ;)
Saltmachine2000: that wink felt very directed at me
HOI: most things I do are directed at you
ITSWADE: here we go again
Saltmachine2000: ill remember that. So next time you dry hump a chair on camera ill know you were thinking of me
HOI: I was thinking more like the time I poured salt on my desk
HOI: but next time I will think of you
Saltmachine2000: so sweet <3
HOI: <3
Pineapplelicker: DAMN PAR BACK AT IT AGAIN MAKING US SHIP TWO ‘STRAIGHT’ GUYS
Saltmachine2000: what were the inverted commas for
HOI: all we are, are two heterosexual guys talking about dry humping
Saltmachine2000: like most guys
ITSWADE: yeah but ‘no homo’ guys don’t usually direct those comments towards one another
Pineapplelicker: it usually means that they think about getting one another off
HOI: JPAR :O
Saltmachine2000: “IM INNOCENT” jps biggest lie
Pineapplelicker: NOT TRUE!!!
Pineapplelicker: I was just stating facts that we know are true
ITSWADE: for once and I literally mean once. Im siding with jp
Pineapplelicker: what do you mean once
Saltmachine2000: gar and I are just messin you know that
HOI: we are just so comfortable in our sexualities that we are okay with playfully bantering
Pineapplelicker: or flirting
ITSWADE: or teasing
Saltmachine2000: neither of those things!
ITSWADE: I could cut the sexual tension between you two with a piece of paper
HOI: well prove it that we don’t feel that way for one another
Pineapplelicker: how
Saltmachine2000: next week when we all see each other. You will see that we are just messin and that we act this way with everyone
ITSWADE: I hope not, im gonna be a married man. I cant ‘mess’ as much as you two doo
Pineapplelicker: and im not interested, I couldn’t take either of you home to my mother
HOI: but your mom loves us????
Pineapplelicker: I meant molly
ITSWADE: yeh she wouldn’t approve if you two dated her favourite
Saltmachine: we aren’t dating
Pineapplelicker: tell that to this!
<Pineapplelicker sent an image>
<Pineapplelicker sent an image>
<Pineapplelicker sent an image>
<Pineapplelicker sent an image>
Saltmachine2000: what the fuck
HOI: what the fuck
ITSWADE: when…how…?
Saltmachine2000: WHEN AND WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET THOSE PICTURES FROM?!?!??!
Pineapplelicker: when we all went to pax together
Pineapplelicker: we did all share a room
ITSWADE: pat you are literally lying on top of him, you are a cuddle monster
HOI: its creepy how you took pictures of us sleeping
Pineapplelicker: its not creepy when you are my best friends who live in denial that you don’t a) cuddle b) like each other and c) that pat doesn’t take up the whole fricking bed!!
ITSWADE: pax was ages ago. How on earth did you keep these pics a secret
Pineapplelicker: well I didn’t want to share them online as its their moment and they didn’t consent
Pineapplelicker: im not a stalker or a bad person
HOI: cuddling…with your best friend doesn’t mean dating
Saltmachine2000: exactly
HOI: like dan and I cuddle all of the time when I see him
ITSWADE: true
Saltmachine2000: wait what
Pineapplelicker: oh god, jealous pat
Saltmachine2000: not jealous just curious on how ive never heard about this
HOI: it??? Never??? Came??? Up???
ITSWADE: just like jps stalkerish cuddling pictures of you two
Saltmachine2000: …
HOI: pat…its not big deal?
Saltmachine2000: I know.
Pineapplelicker: :O
Pineapplelicker: he used a full stop! :O :O :O
Saltmachine2000: So?!
ITSWADE: um…
ITSWADE: so soda challenge next week?
Pineapplelicker: YES!
ITSWADE: we will go get the flavours together when you land
Pineapplelicker: good enough for me!!!
HOI: yeah
Saltmachine2000: and we will try and not throw up
Pineapplelicker: now that’s the spirit!!
ITSWADE: well its been painful as ever lads. But I gtg, molly and I are going out for dinner
Pineapplelicker: yeah I gtg 2, oliver needs a walk
Saltmachine2000: see ya guys
HOI: bai!
~ITSWADE is now offline~
~Pineapplelicker is now offline~
HOI: so…
Saltmachine2000: am I better
HOI: ???
Saltmachine2000: at cuddling
HOI: oh? Yeah I mean you keep me from falling out of bed and keep me warm…so yeah
Saltmachine2000: good.
HOI: why?
Saltmachine2000: cause I pride myself on my cuddling skills
HOI: maybe I will need a reminder, just in case I have any doubts ;)
Saltmachine2000: challenge accepted :P
HOI: :)))
HOI: wellll ill ttyl, dad needs me
Saltmachine2000: yeah, see ya gar x
HOI: <3
~HOI is now offline~
Saltmachine2000: well im fucked
~Saltmachine2000 is now offline~