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When you say your “I do’s” in front of God, your relatives, and your friends, you expect the relationship to last more than a few months or years. Even though we’d been together since our teens, the marriage lasted just over a year and a half. The day that certified envelope arrived for me, I locked myself in my bedroom and cried. That’s right you heard me, a grown twenty-something hard-nosed defenseman for the Chicago Blackhawks, cried.
When the divorce proceedings ended, I was handed a judgment to hand over half of our combined possessions and a hefty alimony payment. I was left with a half-empty condo and full custody of our two-year-old son. At that moment it dawned on me, there is no book named “Single Dad Hockey Player for Dummies.”
Life presented me with three options that day. I let my mother babysit while I considered them over a bottle of whiskey with my friends Sharpy, Kaner, Seabs, and Tazer. We sat on the floor because she got almost everything but the bed. I don’t remember most of that conversation that night, but the reality persisted. I had a two-year-old son in my custody and the second half of an 82-game season left to play.
I could have my mother take my son for the rest of the season, be a dad when I can and let one of the player’s wives take care of my son when I can, or I could get a nanny. I learned who my true friends were when that decision was made. Brent Seabrook and his pregnant wife Dayna took my son in as one of their own during road trips, games, and practices. His son was the same age as mine and they were already friends, and I was thankful to have someone watch him when I couldn’t.
The season passed by so fast. That summer I moved out of my condo and into a row home next to Seabs and his wife. It was by far the best decision I ever made because I could just hand my son to Dayna and carpool with Brent to practices, games, and the airport. She was a godsend, and my teammate became my support structure.
I spent the next 10 seasons raising my son on my own and playing alongside my best friend, I couldn’t have done any of this without Brent’s help. I went on long-term IR in 2023 with mounting career-ending injuries and fled to my new cabin in the Manitoba forest while Brent continued to play eventually earning a Stanley Cup ring and his own retirement.
Just as Brent had been there after my divorce, I was there for Brent during his own. Dayna had walked out on him the day he announced his retirement leaving him with a home to sell, three kids to raise, and a move to Winnipeg to handle completely on his own. I invited him to my cabin and we talked about raising our children together.
In the end, we ended up together just like we had been before we both got married and had kids. We are now raising our kids together. I don’t miss single fatherhood and I really do love the friend I once called my bestie. I now call him my partner.
-Duncan Keith, Contributor