Chapter Text
The first chapter: I’m definitely in crush
I’m Kim Jiwon aka king of the youth or the rapper Bobby. I debuted 5 years ago and my career is at his peek. I have everything a 23 years old man could dream of. Lovely family, good friend, big house and latest sports cars. The only thing I don’t have is my sanity. I lost it three month ago when I didn’t manage to... sexually please that girl. The embarrassment I felt was unbearable. My fuckboy reputation I build for years was ruined because of a stupid crush on a guy. Yeh *sigh* I’m 23 yo and I still can’t get over a simple crush. At first I thought that I was going crazy. How a fuckboy like me who had all the girl he ever wanted in his bed could crush on a guy ? Little clarification I’m not a bad guy, I never gave those girls false hopes. It’s a bit ridiculous to attend anything serious from my 23 yo ass. I’m too young and too rich to settle down. That’s what I thought before meeting this guy at my agency, few months ago. I never seen him before since he is a model at GY k+, we didn’t work in the same building. Now this guy is in all my thoughts, without exception. I even start to dream about him. I barely ever talk to him but he already messed up all my life. I started to write love verse, stopped sleeping with all those pretty girls I met... Okay that might be because I was scared to failed... again aishhh. In the other hand my mom is happier, my new way of living is plenty satisfying her. What it’s kinda understandable. Imagine seeing a different girl in your son’s bed every time you come to fill his fridge with side dishes. If it was me I will disown myself. Mum never said anything about it, just praying that I will find my significant other one day. She is clearly an angel but I’m wondering how she will react if I dated a guy ? How could I think about dating anyone when I can barely look the man in the eyes. Those beautiful black eyes. His sight was so intense and fierce. The guy was sure confident about his look. Like those extra strong coffee, which sure will not let you sleep all night long. His sharp eyes are clearly his charming point, but his all face is harmoniously pretty. His nose is cute, I already imagined countless times how satisfied I will be after putting a kiss on top of it. Talking about kiss, I can’t stop thinking about his pink lips. How soft they could be. Omg I’m really desperately in crush with Koo Junhoe.
“Why don’t you simply ask him out” Chanwoo was repeating this sentence endlessly those past few weeks. It slowly become a nag. He surely never thought that in all his friends I’ll be the one in need for love advice. He doesn’t know that I lost my confidence after my poor performance few months ago. I couldn’t live with an all Jung Chanwoo teasing me about my sexual life. I better run away in Groenland if he ever heard it. I try to ask advices to the only established gay couple I know Yunbin. But those two crackheads were more chocked by my lack of confidence than willing to give me advices. “Bob I don’t think you are really attracted to him otherwise it will be already in your bed” laughingly said Yunhyeong. Hanbin in other hand got the most weird scenario in his head. “What If you’re trying to recreate our relationship. Maybe you just want a true relationship and don’t know how. So your brain kinda take our couple as exemple and make you think you are attracted to this guy. Since it’s all made up you can’t make a first move forward him because you’re not really attracted by him” I would have laughed if Yunhyeong didn’t start looking at Hanbin as he just resolved a mechanic quantic problem. At the end I still doesn’t know how I should woo this guy. I create thousands plans in my head. “You could ask him to be in your next MV” suggested Donghyuk. Thinking about it he was here to feature in an MV the first time i saw him. It could work, I’ll ask him out for a drink, with the excuse of work... No no no it’s a bad idea. I shouldn’t approach him like this, I never mixed work and personal stuffs before. I even fired one of those model, who thought that unfocusing me with her wandering hands, will assure her a model contract with my company. Little does she know that is the only ethic I have. I should not lose it today. After few days of overthinking I gathered all my courage. I’m Kim Jiwon after all I should not be scared of rejection like a fifteen years old girl. After facing my phone screen for forty minutes, I finally did it. I press that damn follow button. I’m definitely and desperately back to my teenage hood.