Chapter Text
“You mean to tell me you were lying the whole time?” June roared, staring Althea down.
“I couldn’t tell you. I made them a promise.” Al whispered, feeling uncomfortable with everyone’s eyes on her.
“So, you decided to be selfish and keep that information to yourself? You could have saved us so much stress Althea!”
It’s been about three months since their group got out of the mountainous forest region that they were stuck in when their plane crash landed. After fighting Logan for the denim factory, the group had settled back in, deciding to focus on making it a home, and not bothering to look for anyone else to help. If people came to them, they’d help them, but no more going out and looking for people. The group was doing some cleaning in the main living space of the factory and Al had accidentally let it slip that she had interacted with the person in the helicopter, meaning that she had lied to everyone.
“Why are you getting upset over this now? It’s been months. We made it all work out.” Sarah said, coming to Al’s defense.
“If Al lied to us before, she’s probably keeping something from us now.” June said, narrowing her eyes at the journalist.
Alicia, Althea’s girlfriend, stood silent, with her arms crossed, noticing Althea flinch at the accusation that she was lying about something and hiding something from them right now. The younger girl didn’t really care about Al lying about the helicopter because it was in the past and bitching about it now isn’t going to do anything except stir up bad feelings.
“June you need to let this go.” Victor said, also seeing Althea flinch.
“No! She needs to learn that we have to be open in this group. Keeping secrets can be dangerous for us all!” With that, June left the room and came back with Althea’s duffle bag, the one that held her camera and all of her tapes.
“Hey! What the fuck do you think you’re doing with that?”
“You need to learn that actions have consequences.” June said, before going out to the little balcony that looked over the river. Without a word, June tossed the bag over the edge, and a sickening crack could be heard, the telltale sound of Althea’s camera breaking as it hit a large boulder. The bag sunk a bit in the water due to the weight and floated down the river.
Even if they retrieved the bag, the amount of damage from the water and rocks would make the tapes unwatchable and the camera destroyed beyond repair.
As soon as June threw the bag over, everyone was deathly silent, staring at Althea.
Al felt her face grow hot and she was pretty sure it was as red as a tomato. The majority of the tapes in the bag were interviews from after the world went to shit, but a small collection were tapes of her family, friends, and people that she knew before the end. Her most precious memories. All gone.
Despite the tapes containing memories of her loved ones, the loss of the camera was what hurt Al the most. Her mother gave her that camera for Christmas her freshman year of high school. She saw the object like it was her baby, and June just threw her baby into the river to break and drown.
“Althea?” Morgan asked gently, because he could tell by her facial expression that the girl was about to explode.
Nobody expected Althea to burst into tears, with heart wrenching sobs shaking her body. Althea wasn’t really the type to cry over every little thing, and she rarely got emotional, so for her to be in so much pain over this, everyone realized that June stepped over the line. The only time Althea really got emotional was if she was having a horrible meltdown, but those were always reserved for in her room, with only Alicia to witness them. The others in the group have never experienced an Althea meltdown and it looks like they are going to now.
Instead of attacking or directing her emotions at June, Althea turned away and ran up to the bedroom that she shared with Alicia. She slammed the door shut and threw herself on the bed, wanting to be alone for the rest of her life.
She heard vague, muffled shouting from downstairs but she was too upset to actively listen to it. It might seem stupid to get so worked up over what June did, but to Althea, her entire life was just thrown out and destroyed before her very eyes.
To make matters worse, Althea has a sensory processing disorder, and that camera was her comfort object. She was fortunate enough to actually pursue a career in journalism, with interviewing people and getting the story being a special interest of hers ever since she was a kid. She felt pretty lucky that she was able to actually have her life’s work be one of her special interests.
As she sat and thought about her camera, she started to cry harder, thinking of her mom. With the exception of her older brother, everyone in Althea’s family was accepting of her sensory processing disorder, and they allowed her to stim, have comfort objects, and be herself no matter what. They had an unspoken rule in the Szewczyk-Przygocki house, that if it helped her, she could use it, whether it was a stim toy, a special interest, or a comfort object. At home, Althea never had to worry about her parents judging her for bringing her camera everywhere to film, and they were even supportive of her special interests, because they wanted her to be happy. Althea’s mother even went as far as sewing two quilts for her to use to line and cushion the box that the camera stayed in at home. Althea never had to worry about her parents destroying her camera. Now that it was gone, so was the last connection that Al had to her parents, especially her mom.
Althea pushed her face into the pillow and cried harder, wishing her mother was there with her now. Her mother would know exactly what to do or say to help her feel better and Althea felt her chest ache from crying. It was like she lost her mother all over again.
About ten minutes later, Althea heard a few tentative knocks on the door. She sat up and sniffled, before looking at the door.
“Come in.” She whimpered, knowing it was Alicia.
“Hey.” Alicia said, shutting the door behind her.
“Hey.” Al whispered, trying to wipe the tears off her cheeks.
“I’m not even going to ask how you’re feeling because I know the answer hasn’t changed.” Alicia said, crossing the room and pulling out a handkerchief. “Blow.” She added, putting the cloth against Al’s nose.
“It hurts.” Al responded; her voice extremely shaky.
“I know Honey. I’m so sorry that June did that. I know your camera is your comfort object, and this pain won’t go away anytime soon. I’m so sorry Al.”
Al didn’t respond, she only let out a shaky exhale and a fresh batch of tears started to leak out of her eyes.
“I know it was just a camera, but it feels like my mom died again.”
“Oh Althea, it wasn’t just a camera. It was more than that. You felt a connection with your mom every time you used it, and it was one of the last things that you had that made you think of her. This is a big deal Honey.”
“What was all that shouting down there?”
“Oh that? Everyone was yelling at June, picking sides over who was right and who was wrong.”
“Who’s on our side?”
“Everyone, except for John. But he’s gonna stick with June no matter what, so that was to be expected.”
“What’s gonna happen now?”
“Morgan is seriously considering exiling June. She destroyed your property over stupid shit that happened months ago. He thinks that if someone else makes her angry, she could snap and kill one of us.”
“What do you think?”
“She hurt you, so I want to kill her, but I know Morgan wouldn’t agree with that. If exiling her is the second-best option, I agree with it.”
“What about John?”
“If June is exiled, he’s gonna have a choice to make. Go with her or stay with us.”
“Maybe I should go.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“It’s just, It’s all my fault. I shouldn’t have lied to you a few months ago and this never would have happened. It’s also my fault because I have this stupid disorder and I can’t fucking handle bad things happening without freaking out about them.”
“Althea…….”
“No! It was all better when it was just me in the van. I only had to worry about myself and nobody touched my stuff, and I got to stim and be myself! This might sound mean, but sometimes I wish June and John went away. They don’t even try to understand me."
“Yeah. It seems like those two aren’t really making an effort.”
“I liked it better before I told them. After I told everyone, they’ve started to look at me differently. Like I’m suddenly a different Althea.”
“Well, why don’t you think about it for a bit, and see if that’s what you really want to do.”
“What? You’d really support me leaving?”
“I’d go with you Al. And besides, do you remember what I told you the night before you told everyone about your sensory processing disorder?”
“You said that you’d never let anyone make me feel like I was inferior. And if they couldn’t accept me, you and I would go and find a new place to call home.”
“That’s right. First, let’s wait until things have calmed down a bit and we’ve come to a decision on what to do with June. Then, if you still want to leave, we’ll go from there. Does that sound ok?”
Al nodded and wiped her eyes with a dry spot on the handkerchief.
“Dinner will be ready in about a half hour. Would you like to join us downstairs, or would you like to eat up here?”
“Up here. I can’t face everyone yet.”
“Ok. That’s fine. I need you to know something though Al. You don’t have to face us; you don’t need to feel shame. You didn’t do anything wrong. Nobody is going to look at you like you’re to blame. But still, take all the time you need to get comfortable.”
Al nodded and Alicia kissed her girlfriend’s forehead.
“Is there anything else I can do for you Al?”
“Um yeah. There is one thing. Can you keep a secret?”
“Sure.”
“In the swat van, hidden in a plastic bag in a compartment under the right-hand bench, there’s a stuffed bunny. It was mine since I was a toddler, and it’s my first comfort object. Could you go get it, but not tell the others?”
“Of course. Is it the right hand from when we open the back door, or if I was looking back from the driver’s seat?”
“From the back door.”
“Ok. I’ll be right back.”
Alicia returned about ten minutes later, carrying the plastic bag in her arms. The bag was a solid red color, so nobody could see what was inside, and Al was grateful that Alicia kept it hidden from everyone else.
“You know, you don’t need to hide this from us. Nobody is going to laugh at you.”
“I’m an adult. Charlie’s an actual kid and she doesn’t need a stuffed animal.”
“Althea, that’s Charlie. She’s happier with a book. You’re Al. You need to do whatever it takes for you to feel better. No comparing yourself to others in the group.”
“But-”
“No buts. Althea, we all have different sets of wants and needs and if you want your bunny, you can have your bunny. If you need your bunny, nobody will keep it from you or take it away.”
Althea pulled the bunny out of the bag and Alicia smiled at how cute it was. It was pale pink in color and had turquoise eyes. It was wearing a plaid print baby sleeper with two soft ribbon bows down the front of the sleeper, and one bow on each foot. The wrist cuffs of the bunny’s sleeper were made out of the same fabric as the bows Even the bottoms of the bunny’s sleeper had feet grippers. The inside of the bunny’s ears were the same satiny fabric that the ribbons and wrist cuffs were made out of and the brand PLAYSKOOL was stitched onto the chest of the sleeper. Alicia could see that even if the bunny was very thin from being old and well loved, it was in near perfect condition.
“She’s cute.” Alicia said, seeing Al’s eyes light up when she saw the bunny.
“Thanks.”
“Does she have a name?”
“Yeah, but I was like one and a half, so I wasn’t creative. Her name is Bunny Rabbit. But I called her Bunny.”
“Well, Bunny is welcome in our room anytime.” Alicia said quietly, going over and giving Al a hug.
“Thanks. For being supportive.” Al whispered as she held onto Alicia.
“Althea, I’ll always be supportive of you.”
“You make me feel like there’s nothing wrong with me.”
“Althie, that’s because there is nothing wrong with you. I love everything about you.”
“You’re my girlfriend. You have a bias.” Al pointed out, nuzzling her nose against the back of the bunny’s head.
“Well, bias or not, I’m right.”
Before Al could say anything, there was a knock on their door. Alicia went over and opened the door slightly to see who it was. She paused when she saw Charlie.
“What’s up?”
“I went outside and I found the bag. I don’t know if anything still works, but it’s all in there.” Charlie said as she held up the bag.
“Oh Charlie, thank you.” Alicia said, giving Charlie a hug. She took the bag and Charlie left to give Al and Alicia privacy.
“Charlie found it.” Alicia said, holding up the bag. “Would you like to look through it and see if we can fix anything?”
“Can we do it tomorrow?”
“If you want. It’s been a rough day hasn’t it?” Alicia asked, knowing that Althea was emotionally drained. The only thing she probably had energy left to do was eat supper and then go to bed.
Al only nodded and laid back down on the bed, hugging her bunny close to her.
“‘Licia?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you know what’s for dinner tonight?”
“Fish. Peas for the vegetable.”
“Can I not have dinner tonight?”
“Althea, you have eat dinner. Not having food in your tummy will only make you feel bad.”
“I don’t like peas. They’d make me feel bad. And we had fish last night.”
Alicia sighed. Al was a picky eater and while Alicia tried to accommodate her to prevent a sensory overload or meltdown, sometimes it wasn’t the most convenient, especially now, years into the apocalypse.
“Ok. What would you like to eat? I can go down to the pantry and see what there is.”
Al only shrugged and started to flap her hands. Alicia smiled at seeing Al stim and she waited patiently for the girl to answer.
“I can’t have it. We don’t have it.”
“What do you mean?”
“What I really want to eat. We don’t have it.”
“How can you be sure? What if we do? What is it?
“I know we don’t have it because we don’t have babies here.”
“What do babies have to do with it?”
Althea grew quiet and Alicia could see a blush start to heat her cheeks.
“Althea, was this a food that you enjoyed before the world ended?”
Al nodded, looking away from Alicia, as if she was embarrassed or ashamed all of a sudden.
“Al, you can tell me anything and you know I won’t judge you. What was the food that you liked?”
“Gerber.” Was all Althea said, her voice sounding teary.
“Like the baby food?” Alicia asked gently, starting to understand why Al was getting embarrassed.
“Rice cereal and prunes.” Was all Althea said, her voice filled with shame. “If you mix them together, the cereal is a good texture, and the prunes make it sweeter.”
Alicia nodded in understanding. This was a comfort food for Al, and she probably hasn’t had it in a long time.
“I’m sorry Sweetie. I wish we had some for you.” Was all she could really say, because nothing that she could do or say would make this better. “I know it’s not the same, but we do have oatmeal downstairs, if you would like that.”
Alicia smiled when she saw Al tilt her head to the side and actually consider the option instead of shutting it down right away. Her smile grew bigger when Al nodded.
“Ok. I’ll go make it and bring it up.”
“Actually, Alicia can I eat downstairs with you?”
“Are you sure that it won’t drain you too much? Because you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
“I want to.” Was all Al said, standing up.
“Ok.”
The two went down to the pantry and kitchen area, and they saw Victor, Luciana, Sarah, and Wendell in the kitchen preparing food and getting everything ready. Charlie was out setting the table, and June and John were nowhere to be found. Morgan wasn’t even there.
“They won’t be joining us for dinner.” Sarah explained, seeing Alicia look around. “And Morgan is upstairs talking to them. He’ll be down in a bit.”
Alicia nodded went on to start making oatmeal.
“Who’s that for?” Luciana asked, since she and the others were making fish and peas.
“Althea. Peas are a big nope for her and since we had fish last night, this is what she wants instead.”
Everyone nodded their heads in understanding and nobody said anything about it.
When Althea told everyone about her sensory processing disorder, Victor, Luciana, Sarah, Wendell, Charlie and Morgan were all understanding and listened to Althea as she explained herself. They politely asked questions if they had them, and they tried to create an environment for Al that would be most comfortable and convenient for her.
John understood the same amount as the others but he always stood up to the defense of June whenever June thought that Al being a picky eater or getting overwhelmed was just her being childish.
When it was time for supper, everyone sat down and started to eat. All except for Althea though. Instead of eating her oatmeal, she sat in her spot and stared at it, all while flapping her hands.
“Aren’t you hungry Al?” Morgan asked, wondering why Althea wasn’t eating.
Al nodded but continued flapping. Morgan only nodded because everyone knew that sometimes, stimming was more important for Al. She’ll eat when she’s done.
Al’s flapping continued while everyone ate and pretty soon it was just her and her full bowl of oatmeal at the table.
Alicia came in after helping clear the table and sat back down next to Al
“You can keep stimming if you’d like, but you need to eat so I’ll feed you.”
With that, Alicia picked up the spoon and started to feed Althea the oatmeal. She didn’t mind feeding Al like an infant, to her it didn’t matter how the food got into Al’s stomach, as long as it did. Plus, Al could keep stimming without having to stop her hand flapping in order to pick up a spoon.
Because Alicia was feeding her, the oatmeal was gone pretty quickly and after taking care of the bowl, Alicia led Al back up to the bedroom. It’s been a very strenuous day for Al and the thing that she needs the most is a good night’s sleep.
“Tomorrow we can go through the bag and see if we can salvage anything.” Alicia said as she tucked Al in, smiling when her girlfriend hugged her rabbit close to her.
Al nodded and puckered her lips up, showing Alicia that she wanted a good night kiss.
“Good night Babe. I’ll be up in a few hours.” Alicia said, after giving Al a peck on the lips.
“Love you Alicia.”
“I love you too Al.” Alicia responded, before shutting off the light and leaving the door open just a crack, walking down the hallway to go back downstairs.