Chapter Text
Anyone who worked alongside Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson and had been observant enough to notice the increasing romantic and sexual tension between the pair over the past few months wouldn’t have been surprised to hear about the two men finally acting upon their feelings.
The two individuals involved, however, genuinely hadn’t planned for things to escalate one summer’s evening. One moment Alexander had been observing Thomas casually lounging against the couch present in the immigrant’s apartment, accompanied by his familiar expression of raised eyebrows and a disdainful smirk, and then out of nowhere, Alex found himself leaning forwards to connect his lips with the Virginian’s.
It was as if time itself stopped.
Alexander’s heartbeat pounded against his chest as he moved his lips passionately against Thomas’ plush ones, and his mind screamed how truly beautiful the other man was. Alex had always known that Thomas Jefferson was an attractive man, but this fact became even more apparent as the immigrant pressed his body against his taller companion’s without breaking mouth contact. Alexander’s eyes fluttered closed as he allowed himself to become consumed by the man he’d usually refer to as his rival.
Everything about Thomas was intoxicating, such as the smell of his horrendously expensive cologne combined with his coconut scented skin, the man’s groomed mane of curly hair that appeared incapable of ever looking bad, that annoyingly arrogant smirk the Virginian often wore when observing Alexander, the way Thomas’ eyes lit up when they filled with intelligence, passion or amusement, and....holy shit, Alexander could feel how physically fit the Virginian was through his awful magenta suit as their bodies maintained contact.
Fuck, he was beautiful.
It took the man in question a moment to overcome his apparent shock at Alexander’s physical advances, but Thomas Jefferson soon began to reciprocate. His lips gently moved against Alexander’s to participate in the passionate kiss, as if Thomas was truly savouring the unfamiliar taste, feel and overall experience of the other man’s mouth. Alex let out an involuntary moan, and slid his hands over the Virginian’s hips before slowly pressing the other man further into his couch.
Refraining from breaking their kiss, Alexander entwined his fingers into Thomas’ curls, while the taller man ran his thumbs against the immigrant’s stubble-covered jaw and cheeks. After a few more minutes, the temperature of Alexander’s living room suddenly seemed to be unbearably hot as the pair continued kissing and making involuntary clothed thrusts with their hips against each other. Alex found himself becoming forcibly aware of how tight his suit trousers were growing to be, and was sure that Thomas Jefferson would be experiencing a similar problem.
Without thinking too deeply, which was an incredibly rare occurrence, Alexander removed his hands from their exploration of Thomas’ hair and neck to run down the man’s toned upper body, silently longing for the Virginian to be rid of his shirt so Alexander could have the wonderful experience of viewing the man’s bare chest. The immigrant’s strong and experienced hands continued moving downwards, and Thomas’ breath hitched sharply as Alexander placed his palms over the other man’s crotch.
An uncontrollable feeling overcame Alexander as he began to fondle and palm Thomas vigorously through his suit trousers, the extent of his experience in such physical matters immediately becoming apparent in his precise and professional touches.
Alex couldn’t place his finger on the specific definition of the emotion he was experiencing, but it felt more than simply general arousal. Desire? Lust? Passion? He wasn’t too sure, but whatever it was that he was feeling thrummed through Alex’s veins as if his entire body was setting alight.
He could liken the feeling to one that he often experienced when verbally battling Thomas Jefferson during their routinely cabinet meetings; the overwhelming need and desire to overpower his opponent. The taller man was someone who could verbally and mentally counter Alex, and the immigrant craved to break the Virginian.
But, right now, not with words, nor embarrassment, nor comebacks, nor insults...
With pleasure.
Alexander didn’t want to make the other man suffer, unless it would be purely associated with getting the Virginian to moan. He knew that he needed Thomas in an undefinable way. He wanted to witness his rival submitting in a way that would make both men scream, and surprisingly not with anger nor indignation like during their cabinet battles.
The euphoric desire to make Thomas Jefferson feel good occupied every part of Alexander’s mind, and he intended on giving the Virginian everything they both wanted. He longed to touch every part of the other man, witness Thomas coming undone and letting go, feel his rival bucking and straining with pleasure beneath him, hear the Virginian begging and moaning for more....
As if on cue, Thomas let out a surprisingly high pitched whimper as Alexander continued his ministrations with renewed passion, which the Federalist interpreted to be as a result of the overwhelming pleasure he was providing.
A gentle smirk found its way onto Alex’s lips as he continued ravaging Thomas’ mouth; he wouldn’t have expected the usually arrogant and spiteful Virginian to be submissive in the bedroom, but the man seemed to be continuously full of surprises, and Alexander loved and craved the thrill that being the dominant individual during sex created.
Sensing that the pair were ready for the next step, the immigrant deepened the kiss shared between the two men, smoothly undid the zip of the Virginian’s trousers, and used his hand to confidently breach into the confines of his partner’s boxers. The rhythmic thumping of the pair’s heartbeats and Jefferson’s breathy gasps were the only sounds Alexander could hear, and were music to his ears.
Suddenly, Alexander felt Thomas Jefferson’s whole body freeze, and the man let out a choked sob as Alex’s hand came into contact with exactly what occupied and lay within the Virginian’s underwear.
Immediately feeling the change in his rival’s physicality, Alex opened his eyes to meet with the other man’s deep hazel orbs. He had expected to observe Thomas’ eyes to be blown wide with pleasure and express nothing except desire, and for the other man to potentially beg for Alexander to resume his ministrations.
However, the Virginian’s pupils were filled with what Alexander could label as panic. Beneath him, Thomas Jefferson looked...scared, and such a foreign and unexpected emotion being displayed upon the man’s face startled Alex.
After a moment, Thomas slowly removed his mouth from the immigrant’s, shaking breaths ghosting over his swollen lips, and Alexander felt his heart flood with ice at the unexpected and unspoken change between the pair.
“Thomas? You alright?” Alex asked tentatively, his breathing heavy as he maintaining eye contact with the Virginian. His hand remained inside Thomas’ pants and in physical contact with the man’s penis, but all movements had stilled between the pair.
“I...I...I’m...” Thomas stuttered quietly, his usual arrogantly confident drawl having vanished and only making the Federalist more concerned.
“Hey, it’s okay. Are we going too fast?” Alexander murmured, pressing what he desired to be a comforting kiss to the taller man’s neck. Perhaps Thomas wasn’t used to being intimate with such an enthusiastic and non-stop sexual partner.
Without thinking, Alexander’s fist that remained curled around Thomas’ penis gave a gentle stroke against the other man, in an automatic attempt to remove any of the Virginian’s doubts or worries and install pleasure into the man’s mind.
In an instant, Thomas was pressing the palms of his hands forcefully against Alexander’s chest to shove the other man off from his body. All physical contact between the two men vanished as Alexander fell backwards onto the other end of the couch, a shocked expression spreading across his features at the sudden turn of events.
Thomas’ eyes remained downcast as he readjusted himself on the far end of the couch, his hands subtly shaking as he pulled up the zip of his trousers and began flattening down his suit to remove any wrinkles or creases caused by his rival’s ministrations. Alexander stared with his mouth slightly open, confusion and dread pooling in the depths of his stomach.
“Thomas?”
The Virginian stood up from the couch and straightened up, his hands rapidly attempting to unfold his crumpled magenta jacket that lay nearby. The man still refrained from speaking, or even looking in Alex’s direction, and the immigrant hastily stood up from the couch.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Alexander asked firmly, placing himself directly in his rival’s eye-line and essentially forcing Thomas to meet his questioning gaze.
After a brief moment that felt more like an hour, Thomas Jefferson connected his eyes with Alex’s as a strangely blank expression spread across his features.
“Hamilton...we can’t do this.”
Thomas’ southern accent sounded completely hollow, and Alexander felt a stab of pain as he noticed how the man he’d previously been making out with had refrained from using his first and personal name.
“What? Why not?” he replied immediately, every ounce inside of him desiring an explanation from the Virginian.
“....we can’t” Thomas said bluntly, breaking eye contact with his rival and placing invisible barriers around himself as he ran his hands over his face and breathed deeply through his nose.
Alexander was beyond confused. Thomas Jefferson had accepted his invitation when he’d invited the man over to his home! Sure, Alexander had initially intended for the pair to simply have dinner and casually discuss his upcoming financial plan, but things had escalated as the rivals had remarkably got along and finally acted upon the various tensions present between them.
The lingering glances, brief moments of physical contact and spoken sexual innuendos the pair had shared over the past few months weren’t imagined by Alex. Hell, both men had even shared intimate photos with each other! This was no case of unequal attraction or unrequited crushing; it was obvious that Thomas Jefferson had returned Alexander’s feelings and implications.
Well, until now, apparently.
However, Alexander naturally wasn’t going to give up and let the Virginian simply disappear without having some of his painful confusion dissipate.
“Thomas, talk to me. What’s wrong? I thought...I thought you wanted this too? Tell me what I’m doing wrong” Alexander asked, his voice straining slightly as he took ahold of the taller man’s hands and rubbed soothing circles along his skin with his thumbs. He hadn’t intended to make Thomas upset or uncomfortable...and Thomas had to know that.
A moment passed where Alexander observed what appeared to be a splintering in Thomas’ emotionless expression, and he was sure that his rival would break and explain exactly what was going on in his head.
However, Thomas Jefferson simply cleared his throat, composed himself, and pulled his hands out of Alexander’s grip with surprising force.
“You thought wrong. How...why would I ever want this with you, Hamilton? You’re delusional” Thomas stated, his voice suddenly possessing a sharp edge as his usual arrogance verbally returned.
The man shrugged on his magenta jacket and made towards the front door as if the conversation was over, but the burning passion and pain within Alexander made him roughly grab the Virginian’s wrist and hold him back.
“I can’t believe you!” Alex spoke, his aggressive and accusing tone and causing Jefferson’s eyes to widen slightly. It was as if the pair were facing off in a heated cabinet battle, and Alexander felt the familiar thrill he experienced when he was about to spit venom with his words.
“Stop fucking lying! I am not delusional, or stupid, Jefferson. You...you wanted this too. What’s the problem? What, are you scared? Ashamed? Aww, did your southern, small minded parents drill homophobia into your tiny brain, and now you’re having a breakdown because you can’t process your desires? Or...are you worried that you’re too much of a pussy to handle me? Scared of letting me wreck you? Can’t handle this dick?”
Alexander’s explosive rant hissed into Thomas’s ear, the shorter man’s internal pain and sadness causing his words to be sharply cruel and personal in his defence as he glared into the Virginian’s face.
Jefferson’s eyes narrowed with defiance and something deeper that resembled pain at Alexander’s words.
“Not everyone wants to sleep with you, Hamilton. Leave me alone”
“Fine! Get your cowardly, overgrown, low self esteem ass the fuck out of my house!” Alexander shouted as Thomas yanked his wrist free from the shorter man’s grip and strode towards Alex’s apartment door.
A moment later, the sound of the front door slamming resonated powerfully around the apartment and in Alexander’s ears. Silence greeted the immigrant as he remained frozen, his chest internally reeling with anger, pain and confusion.
Coming back to his senses slightly and momentarily blocking out his pain with anger, Alex stormed over to his couch and furiously flopped onto the furniture, before inhaling a whiff of Thomas’ overpriced cologne. Cursing the Virginian lowly, the immigrant instantly shuffled over to the far end of the couch. Rage was twisting through Alexander, and the man wanted nothing more than to continue fighting with his rival in the same manner that the pair usually did during cabinet meetings.
Fuck Thomas Jefferson.
Fuck his stupid hair, stupid eyes, stupid mouth, stupid accent, stupid clothes, stupid good looks...
However, powerful feelings of longing, abandonment, sadness and guilt soon subdued the Federalist’s boiling level of anger, and Alex felt his chest ache with familiar loneliness.
How had he managed to screw up something that was going so well?
Running his hands through his messy locks, Alexander took a few more minutes to breathe deeply and determine what his next course of action would be. He had almost a primal urge to seek out human contact, but obviously speaking to Thomas Jefferson again this evening was out of the question.
Slowly, Alex reached for his phone that he’d placed safely on a nearby table when Thomas had arrived at his apartment and scrolled rapidly through his contacts with the desperate wish to find his best friend’s name.
John Laurens.
Alexander held the phone up to his ear and waited patiently as the sound of repetitive ringing met his ears. Perhaps John was busy and wouldn’t pick up, or maybe he was—
”Yo, Alex! I didn’t expect you to call! How’s date night with Jeffershit going?”
The immigrant breathed an audible sigh of relief that his best friend had picked up and allowed Alex to hear his comforting voice.
”Alex, what’s up?”
”I fucked it up, John. Thomas left and it’s all my fault” Alexander hated how his voice sounded incredibly hollow over the phone, but desperately needed someone to confide in right now.
”Really?? What happened?”
”I don’t know how things went so badly so quickly! One minute we were making out and things started to get heated, and the next he’s telling me that he doesn’t want to have sex with me and that I’m delusional for thinking so”
A brief moment of silence met Alexander’s ears as the man at the other end of the line stayed quiet. Then, John started speaking again and Alex felt a gentle smile begin to spread across his face.
”Fuck it, I’m coming over”
——————————————————
Thomas Jefferson didn’t entirely remember driving back to his own apartment, but couldn’t hide from his emotions when he closed the front door behind him and was finally alone. With his back pressed against the door, the Virginian inaudible slid to the floor, tucked his knees up in front of him in a position that exclusively screamed vulnerability, and buried his head in his hands.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck....
Inhaling deeply, Thomas ran his fingers gentle through his curls and across his scalp in an attempt to calm himself down and control his overpowering and unwanted emotions. His technique worked for a moment, and the man found himself relaxing ever so slightly....before Thomas’ mind reminded him of how only thirty minutes ago, the strong and experienced hands of Alexander Hamilton had been buried within his hair.
Letting his hands fall to the floor at such a thought, Thomas stared blankly across his hallway and felt his chest heave with a multitude of mostly negative emotions; loneliness, desire, shock, pain, sadness...
”Fucking idiot” Thomas whispered to himself, before reaching into his jacket pocket with the automatically wish to speak to the one person who’d remained by his side for longer than Thomas could remember.
The gentle voice of James Madison met his ears after the second phone ring, and Thomas felt himself automatically release an amount of tension at the comforting sound.
”Thomas, everything alright?”
Of course, James would immediately be suspicious and question the reason why the other Virginian was calling him, seeing as Thomas had spent the majority of the day talking animatedly with him about how Alexander Hamilton had invited him over for dinner that evening.
”Not really” Thomas sighed, and James’ tone became more concerned.
”What happened? Where are you? Are you safe?”
Thomas smiled slightly at his best friend’s caring nature, before confirming that he was at his own apartment. After another pause, Thomas felt loneliness stab into his stomach once again, and desperately wished to converse with his best friend in person.
”Jemmy....I know that it’s late, and I completely understand if this is a bad time, but....would you come over?”
Thomas was surprised to hear how timid and vulnerable his voice currently sounded, but felt his heart swell with unexpected happiness at his best friend’s reply.
”I’ll be over in ten minutes.”
———————————————————
”Okay, let me get this straight; you invited Thomas Jefferson over to have dinner and talk, and then you both started making out and touching each other on your couch, and you were both getting into it, and he was making a lot of pleasurable noises, and then you started giving him a hand job, but then he threw you off and decided that he was leaving, so you confronted him, and he told you that you’re delusional for thinking that he wanted to have sex with you?”
Alexander sighed and nodded in confirmation of his best friend’s recap and summary of events.
”Yeah...and then I got mad with him, and he got mad with me and left.”
The duo were sitting on Alex’s bed, seeing as the downstairs couch was currently not the best environment to conduct their deep talk in. Glancing across at his best friend, Alexander couldn’t help but let out a humourless laugh at John’s confused and partially annoyed facial expression as the man lay back against the multitude of pillows that Alex kept on his bed.
”Yo...what’s wrong with that dude?” John said after a moment, shaking his head and making Alexander release an involuntary chuckle.
”I don’t know! He was really into it. But it was like a switch was moved in his brain and he suddenly decided that he found me undesirable and would never even consider sleeping with me...” Alex trailed off, and John immediately knew what his best friend was implying.
”Alexander Hamilton; you are not undesirable. Or bad when it comes to sex, and you know that I can personally confirm this! Man, you’ve literally got the reputation for being non stop both at your desk and in the bedroom.” John stated firmly, but Alex wasn’t reassured.
”You didn’t see the look on his face, John. It was like..like he was horrified with what I was doing. Repulsed by me. Scared, even. You can’t even imagine Thomas Jefferson looking scared, but that’s what he looked like” Alex explained sadly, and John felt his chest ache at the uncommon sight of his best friend feeling so low.
”Alex, you don’t deserve to feel so low about yourself...and especially as a result of that stupid, manipulating, good for nothing, cowardly, southern asshole. You’re twice the man he’ll ever be, not to mention significantly more attractive” John exclaimed, making Alex smile slightly.
”Thanks, John. I just...don’t know what to do now. Should I talk to him? Apologise?”
”Why would you be the one who needs to apologise?!” Laurens exclaimed in disbelief, his eyebrows creasing and freckled face expressing confusion and annoyance.
”What if I misjudged him and his intentions? What if it was actually obvious that he didn’t want me, but I was too oblivious and occupied to notice? What if I accidentally forced him? What if—“ Alexander began, his voice expressing pure doubt and guilt, but John quickly cut off his rhetorical questioning.
”Alex, do you want to hear what I honestly think?” the freckled man asked slowly, and continued speaking when Alex nodded immediately.
”I think that Thomas Jefferson is a complete dick. You know how spiteful and manipulative he can be. Well, have you thought about if he’d planned to make you feel this way? That asshole loves making you doubt yourself every day, and I can see him devising this plan to have you feel inadequate. He’s trying to make you feel insecure.”
”But...that doesn’t make sense. If that’s true, are you saying that he was never actually attracted to me?” Alex asked slowly, and John shook his head firmly.
”Not necessarily. Picture this; you’re Thomas Jefferson, a guy who’s probably been taught to demonstrate his masculinity at every possible time and potentially believes that being attracted to men isn’t right. He is southern, after all” John began, and Alex snorted with a small grin.
”John, are you forgetting that you’re southern too?”
”Excuse me, I don’t meet any social criteria that being from the south entails! Thomas Jefferson, however, is a walking and talking Virginian stereotype; he’s arrogant, rich with family money, pompous, high on his own inflated level of self-esteem, uncaring, delusional, probably been raised to be sexist, homophobic—“ John stated until Alex cut off his ranting with a raised hand.
”Okay, okay! Fair point. Please continue”
“Thank you” John replied, the man grinning before clearing his throat and speaking.
”Now, imagine how vulnerable and disadvantaged a person like Jeffershit feels when he meets you, Alexander Hamilton, and has his opinions, dominance, masculinity and sexuality challenged every day. He knows that he should hate you, and he wants to stay in control, but is simultaneously attracted to you. You get me so far?” John asked, and Alex nodded in confirmation of his understanding.
”So our poor, dear Thomas starts to feel frustrated, annoyed, emotionally torn, etc etc. He thinks about how he can regain control. So, he devises the perfect plan; he would go along with his attraction towards you and ensure that you get the message that he’s interested. Cut to you inviting him over to your house this evening, and Jefferson actively participating in your affections towards him. Now, I’m taking a guess here, but it’s likely that Jefferson would have had the intention of dominating you; he’d wish to re-establish control and raise his self esteem by being in control of you during sex. That way, he’d feel satisfied that the threats against his masculinity and possession of control are subdued, and he wouldn’t have to fear you anymore. You’d be one less thing to worry about.”
”But, I’m sure Jeffershit didn’t anticipate for you to be the dominant one in the bedroom. Therefore, when he realised that he was out of his depth, had no chance of overpowering you, and started to actually enjoy the experience of being at your will, he panicked and tried to recover by making you doubt yourself and feel insecure.” John finished triumphantly, crossing his arms and staring into Alex’s eyes.
A brief moment of silence established itself between the two friends as Alexander mentally processed all that John had said and suggested.
”You could be right” the Federalist sighed.
”I d’know Alex, but all I’m saying is that Thomas Jefferson’s the sort of person who’d do something like that” John shrugged, before noticing how his best friend still looked unsatisfied.
”Come on, forget about that asshole right now. We can hang out for the rest of the evening!” John suggested as Alex flopped down to lie next to the southerner on his bed.
”I really thought he liked me back..at least for a moment or two. But I guess not” Alexander spoke softly, and John felt his heart ache at the painful tone of the immigrant’s voice.
”Me and Herc can teach him a lesson if you’d like?” John offered lightly, more out of humour than seriousness, and Alexander successfully laughed.
”You know that Herc thinks Jefferson is fine! Herc could take anyone down but would never touch Thomas Jefferson in a million years! He’s always going on about how nice his hair and bone structure is” Alex stated with a laugh, and John shrugged.
”True, but we are your sworn best friends, and would obviously defend you to the death no matter what!”
Alexander continued laughing softly, and John’s heart hammered slightly harder against his rib cage when the smaller man pulled him into a sideways hug.
”Thanks for coming over tonight, John. You’ve really made me feel a bit better. And at least I understand Jeffershit a bit more now, so dealing with him won’t be as difficult from now on”
John smiled softly, resting his forehead gently on top of Alexander’s surprisingly soft locks.
”It’s no problem, Alex. Can’t have you feeling upset because of some asshole”
——————————————————-
”I’m such an idiot, James!”
”No, you’re not”
”Yes, I am!”
James Madison sighed and took ahold of Thomas Jefferson’s stress-clenched hands. The pair of Virginians had been sitting on Thomas’ couch for the past fifteen minutes, which had been enough time for James to begin piecing together the events and emotions that had caused Thomas to have worked himself into such a state of upset.
”It’s all my fault, Jemmy!” Thomas moaned for what seemed like the hundredth time as his hands were taken into the smaller man’s gentle embrace.
”Okay, take some more deep breaths and we’ll start again from the beginning. So, you like Alexander Hamilton in..that way?” James began, automatically zoning into therapist friend mode and encouraging Thomas to break down his messy thoughts and conflicting emotions.
The taller Virginian met James’ eyes slowly, and the shorter man immediately noticed a slight darkening of Thomas’ cheeks at the question.
”Yeah, Jemmy, I do...if you hadn’t guessed already”
”Surprisingly, I had guessed. One of the reasons for my guess being that you talk about him way too much every day for there to only be hatred between you” James smiled, and Thomas shrugged in agreement with downcast eyes.
”And you wanted to have sex with Hamilton?”
Thomas paused for a moment, before clearing his throat and talking in a tone that James instantly recognised to be false confidence.
”Yes, I did. I hadn’t expected stuff to escalate how and when they did, but...I wanted him” Thomas said softly and shortly, and James could tell that his best friend felt embarrassed about discussing the extensive details of sex and his emotions, especially when they related to Alexander Hamilton.
However, this behaviour wasn’t unusual. Thomas had always been surprisingly quiet whenever the topic of his various crushes had come up over the years, and James honestly thought that it was adorable for such a loudmouthed, outwardly confident and publicly established man to immediately become a blushing and stuttering mess at the hands of his romantic attractions.
”So, what happened? Did you get overwhelmed? Change your mind halfway through?” James asked gently, and Thomas pulled away from James’ touch to run his fingers through his curls absentmindedly.
”James...so you know that I’ve never been with anyone sexually or romantically other than Martha?” Thomas asked, clearly seeking for support and reassurance, and James immediately nodded.
”Well, I just..panicked. As soon as we started kissing, half of my mind cheered and the other half just shut down. Hamilton..he was everywhere. He was moving so fast. I couldn’t...” Thomas trailed off, clearly attempting to organise his muffler thoughts into words, but James held up a hand to pause his rambling.
”Did Hamilton force you to do anything that you didn’t want to do?” he asked seriously, but Thomas shook his head forcefully.
”What? No, God no! It wasn’t like that! He didn’t..I wouldn’t..he didn’t...” Thomas stumbled over his words nervously, and James began to regret his questioning. It was wise to simply let Thomas speak when the man became too stressed or nervous, and verbal interruptions never helped.
The taller Virginian cleared his throat to compose himself and continued after another moment.
”You’re right; I think I did get overwhelmed. Hamilton was..moving very fast, and it all felt new and too much for me. I loved what was happening, but..but I didn’t know how to be enough for him” Thomas stated quietly, and James frowned slightly.
”What do you mean?”
”Well...he’s Alexander Hamilton! His reputation implies that he’s probably had sex with half of the New York population! He’s experienced. He knew exactly what to do, and it would have been obvious that I had no idea what I was doing! How..how was I ever going to be enough for him? What if he’d gotten upset with me? What if he’d laughed at me? What if he’d told everyone that I was bad? What if—“ Thomas laughed slightly hysterically to mask his cracked voice, and James let out a pained sigh before pulling his best friend into a supportive hug. The problem had suddenly become extremely clear to James, and he needed to get through to his overwhelmed companion.
”Thomas, you need to listen to me, okay?” the shorter Virginian spoke.
”You are enough. You are enough for yourself, and for any other person on this planet. Just because you..haven’t had as much sex as certain other people, doesn’t mean that you’d be bad in bed. But, what you need to understand is that whatever Alexander Hamilton thinks of you does not define you. Let’s hypothetically imagine that he would have laughed at you, or thought you were bad; why should his opinion make you feel less worthy about yourself?”
Thomas sighed and ran a hand wearily over his face. The pair sat in silence for a few more minutes.
”I guess you’re right, Jemmy. I just wish that I’d handled my exit more smoothly and hadn’t acted like an asshole when I panicked. Hamilton definitely didn’t deserve that...”
”Hey, there’s no point worrying about that now. Fortunately or unfortunately, you’ll be seeing Hamilton at work tomorrow and will have plenty of opportunities to speak with him honestly about what happened. He clearly likes you back, and I’m sure he won’t be stupid enough to refuse or misunderstand your explanation. You know that I don’t like the man, but I want you to be happy, and if you like Hamilton then go and make up with him”
The Virginians spoke together for another hour about the situation and other topics of interest, with Thomas significantly more relaxed than he had been straight after arriving home from Hamilton’s apartment. After Thomas thanked his best friend profusely for his support and advise, James left at around midnight, and the taller Virginian was once again alone with only the company of his own thoughts.
In an attempt to prevent his nervousness from bombarding his mind with unwanted thoughts, Thomas decided to try and get some sleep before work in the morning. His open bedroom window allowed the continuous murmur of New York City to gently meet his ears, and although the sound usually made Thomas reminiscent of the comforting and silent nights present in Virginia, the sounds of the City surprisingly helped to relax the man.
He needed to listen to James. Everything was going to be alright if he explained himself. This wasn’t his fault. He’d be able to find the right words to say tomorrow.
As his eyes grew heavy and fluttered closed, Thomas’ final thought was that maybe Alexander Hamilton was listening to New York City that night too.
————————————————————-
Surprisingly, Alex had fallen asleep before his usual time of 3 A.M, most likely due to the emotionally exhausting evening, and lay deeply asleep on his bed. The immigrant’s mouth was hanging slightly open, and a soft snore emanated from his chest, which only made John Laurens suppress his laughter at the sight and sound.
Alexander and John always stayed over at each other’s apartments when either man came over for the evening, and John saw no logical reason for leaving until the early hours of morning before work commenced. Presently, the freckled man found himself lying wide awake next to his best friend’s sleeping form with his mind refusing to relax.
After the topic of Thomas Jefferson had been thoroughly discussed, John had successfully managed to cheer up Alex before he’d passed out for exhaustion, but the southerner couldn’t get their earlier subject of conversation out of his head...
Alex didn’t deserve to be mistreated by someone like Jefferson, and John felt his stomach clench in anger at the thought of the Virginian smirking in satisfaction at Alexander’s pain.
However, John wasn’t able to lie to himself and pretend that he didn’t also feel jealousy pumping through his veins.
Alright, Alexander and him had never been an official couple, and had both agreed that they’d be better off as best friends rather than lovers or boyfriends. But, despite it having been years now since the pair last had sex together, John still felt an ache in his heart when he though of all that was no more.
Fucking Jefferson. Why did Alexander have to be attracted to someone so horrible? There were plenty other people who would be so much better for him than Thomas Jefferson, and John mentally included himself in that category. Alex deserved so much more than anything Jefferson could give him. Why was Alex willing to sleep with Jeffershit instead of someone like John himself?
Woah. Okay, where did that thought come from? John immediately halted that dangerous idea. No, Alexander and him were better off as friends. They’d previously tried to coordinate a relationship, and it hadn’t worked. That was the end of it. There was no use in bringing up old emotions when Alex had clearly and completely moved on with his life.
Sighing deeply, John lay motionless on Alex’s bed for another few minutes, before his eyes opened once again. Remembering that Alexander would naturally have forgotten to set his work phone alarm clock, John reached across and found his best friend’s phone, unlocking it (obviously John and Alex shared their phone passwords with each other, duh!) and squinted at the bright screen.
It took John only a moment to turn on Alex’s alarm clock, but his eyes remained glued to the screen. Absently glancing at Alex’s texts, John saw that Thomas Jefferson had refrained from texting Alex after he’d left earlier that evening, and John felt his heart begin to fill with rage once again.
Nothing? No explanation? Not even a one word apology? Fucking dickhead.
John knew that he should stop himself from invading Alex’s privacy, but found his fingers automatically typing out an angry and aggressive text addressed to Jefferson. It was only when John remembered that Alex had decided that avoiding Jefferson should be the next step, did John reluctantly delete the draft.
Resigning to simply place the phone down without further intrusions, John reached across to place Alex’s phone on the bedside table, but accidentally loosened his grip on the device and felt his fingers slip down the electronic screen.
Pulling the phone towards him once more to adjust his grip, John lifted his fingers to find the ‘off’ button, but froze when his eyes absently lingered on the screen.
John had accidentally swiped upwards to view another part of Alexander’s conversation with Jefferson, and the freckled man felt his heart clench when he saw more of exactly what the two men had been sending each other.
A partially naked photo of Alexander himself was displayed in the chat, with the Federalist grinning cheekily up at the camera. John immediately noticed how Alex had positioned the photo so his private parts were only just out of the shot. The caption underneath the photo said ‘what’s up, Jefferson?’
John found himself staring at the photo for what seemed like hours, as jealousy and pain blossomed in his chest all over again. Alex had never sent John any photos like this when they were together. Why had Alex felt he could send Thomas Jefferson such a photo? The guy was an asshole!
Putting any guilty thoughts out of his mind, John scrolled down in the chat and saw with a jolt that Jefferson had replied with a similar image.
The man was laying down fully naked on what John presumed to be his bed (who else would have such obviously expensive sheets?), and a stifled breath trapped itself in John’s throat when he observed how Jefferson had apparently taken Alex’s intimate photo as a personal challenge; Thomas had his hand wrapped around his dick in full view of the camera, and wore a smirk with the photo captioned “plenty, Hamilton” with a winking face added on the end.
Staring at the photo with a mixture of disgust, jealousy and awe (although John would never admit it, Jefferson had a nice body, like hot damn), John decided that he’d seen enough and desired to burn both the photos of Alex and Jefferson permanently out of his mind.
However, the man paused momentarily as a smirk spread across his freckled face as an idea hit him.
Jefferson would be horrified if anyone other than Alex ever observed that personal photo of him touching himself.
John felt his grin widen as he imagined the furious expression plastered over Thomas Jefferson’s stupid face if his nudes were ever leaked.
That asshole would surely feel embarrassed...and maybe finally understand that you can’t just go around leading people on if you don’t plan on actually having sex with them.
John was known for his impulsivity, and found himself saving the photo of Jefferson before giving his intentions a second thought; Jeffershit had hurt Alexander, and obviously deserved to suffer the consequences of messing with John’s best friend.
Besides, he was sure Alex would find the idea hilarious, and the thought of his best friend laughing in the face of the man who’d stood him up only spurred John onwards.
Alexander’s phone contact list revealed an extensive amount of people who John knew that Jefferson was connected to, the majority of them being work colleagues. The man felt his heart leap with adrenaline as he began to select individuals to send Thomas’ photo to.
Angelica Schuyler
John Adams
Eliza Schuyler
Samuel Seabury
Peggy Schuyler
Hercules Mulligan
James Reynolds
Aaron Burr
Benjamin Franklin
Charles Lee
In total, John selected around twenty people who definitely knew Jefferson, and found himself silently laughing as he selected his last few people; James Madison and Lafayette. Jeffershit’s best friend and french companion would be especially affected by the unexpected nude photo, and John’s chest shook with laughter as he pressed the ‘Send’ button with almost no hesitation. The phone was then placed back innocently on Alex’s bedside table as if nothing had happened.
Lying back down next to Alexander’s sleeping form, John grinned into the darkness and couldn’t wait to see Alex’s reaction in the morning.
———————————————————-
Alexander was awoken from a deep sleep hours later, and immediately assumed that his morning alarm had been the cause of his slumber being disturbed.
Groaning and squinting his eyes open against the bright morning light, Alex blindly reached in the vague direction of his bedside table, and managed to pick up his vibrating phone. Pulling the device in front of his face, Alex clicked the screen repeatedly in an attempt to subdue his alarm and grant himself another ten minutes in bed.
However, the repetitive sounds and vibrations emanating from his phone refrained from ending, and Alex blearily opened his eyes with a growing frown displayed over his face.
It took Alexander’s eyes a moment of rapid blinking to allow himself to adjust to the brightness of his screen, but soon saw with surprise that his phone was blowing up with texts.
Angelica Schuyler: “Alexander What The Fuck”
Hercules Mulligan: “HAHAHAHAHAHHA”
Eliza Schuyler: “um, Alex?”
Peggy Schuyler: “OMG he’s hot!”
Aaron Burr: “Alexander...”
James Madison: “How Dare You.”
Samuel Seabury: “why did you send this to me?
John Adams: “Nice pic”
Lafayette: “Mon ami...pourquoi?”
James Reynolds: “Always knew he was a fag”
Charles Lee: “PFFFFFTTTT DICKHEAD”
Unsurprisingly, Alexander was incredibly confused and sat up in bed, immediately wide awake and frowning.
Everything became more clear upon opening his phone.
Alex’s widened eyes immediately focused upon a familiar photo of none other than Thomas Jefferson in a state of undress. It took the Federalist a moment to realise that this was the same intimate photo that the Virginian had sent to Hamilton last week...
Somehow, the photo that Thomas had sent him been forwarded to a handful of people in his contacts.
From his own phone.
Immediately feeling his stomach plummet with horror and disbelief, Alex cursed and began scrolling through all his incoming messages.
How had this happened?
He didn’t remember doing this!
Had he been drinking last night?
Oh god...
A familiar laugh sounded from nearby, and John Laurens appeared next to Alex, the man yawning loudly and stretching dynamically.
”Yo everyone’s seen the photo? I can’t wait to see the look on Jeffershit’s face!” John chuckled, and Alex heard the usually warming and comforting sound as if he were stuck underwater; the truth hit Alexander like a tidal wave and made the whole world appear muffled and distorted for a moment.
John Laurens, his best friend and companion, had sent out the photo.
”Alex?” the freckled man asked when he made another joke at Jefferson’s expense and Alexander refrained from responding.
Twisting his body to face the other man head on, Alex stared at John in pure disbelief, his mouth slightly open with shock, eyes connecting deeply with his best friend’s confused gaze.
”What have you done?” immigrant asked quietly, his voice devoid of all emotion.
John opened his mouth to respond, but Alex cut him off. The harsh reality of the situation was making his brain speed up to its normal non-stop setting, and waves of emotions and thoughts were assaulting Alex’s mind.
”What the fuck, John?! How could you send that out?” Alex cried, the unexpected noise and display of emotion causing John to flinch slightly; the boyish grin vanished from his face at the amount of anger lacing his best friend’s words.
”Alex, chill!”
”Why the fuck did you do that?” Alexander demanded, his fists shaking with rage and knuckles turning white. His phone was still clutched in his hand, cheerily displaying Thomas’ photo in an almost mocking fashion.
”It was a joke! Jefferson was an asshole to you, and I thought that you’d find it funny to get some payback!” John explained hurriedly, raising his hands up as if in a surrender to Alex’s rage.
”That doesn’t mean he deserved to have his nudes leaked!”
”Oh, I’m sorry about hurting poor Thomas’ feelings. Maybe he should have thought twice before sending out a photo of himself jerking off” John said bitterly, his tone remarkably cold and unlike his usual cheerful quality.
”Oh my god” Alexander cried, throwing his face into his hands and suppressing the urge to scream with anguish.
The photo of Thomas would be rapidly circulating the internet right now.
There was no way easy of stopping it from spreading.
Alex had read articles about how people’s nudes being leaked had caused their lives to be ruined.
Everyone at work had either already seen the photo, or would be shown it in the near future.
What if the photo reached the Press?
John had sent the photo to James Madison, which...oh god...meant that Thomas would have found out about the photo being leaked from none other than Alex’s phone.
Thomas...
Opening his burning eyes and lifting his head up slowly from his palms, Alex’s gaze met with John. The man looked very wary, and had positioned himself slightly further away from Alexander on the bed, his hands nervously wringing themselves in his lap.
The freckled man looked distinctly like a naughty child who’d just been caught disobeying his father and was anticipating the punishment.
”You had no right to go through my phone, let alone send out that photo” Alex spoke coldly, and the tense silence within the room was so clear it could almost have been seen.
“I can’t believe you. What were you thinking? Are you insane? You actually thought that leaking Jefferson’s nudes was a good idea? Jefferson..can be an asshole, but nobody deserves to have their life ruined! Everyone will see the photo, John, including the newspapers! Thomas is a person, and he’s in the public eye, and people who hate him will have a field day with that photo being leaked!” Alex shouted, his words becoming more frantically spoken as his verbal explosion continued.
Yet, Alex forced himself to stop speaking; he didn’t have the time to continue yelling at his best friend and waste more time.
Launching himself off the bed, Alexander hurried over to his wardrobe and began pulling clothes off various hangers almost as fast as his hands moved when holding a pen. John stared silently as the shorter man sprinted into the bathroom to change; Alex needed to get into work as soon as possible and attempt to diffuse the situation...and explain himself to Thomas Jefferson.
————————————————————
Twenty minutes later, Alexander pulled up outside of Washington office buildings alone; John had mumbled something about how he needed to get home and change his clothes before work.
Rubbing his hands stressfully over his face, Alex let out a deep sigh. Ultimately, he knew that John hadn’t meant to upset Alex or cause any irreversible damage. But his best friend seemed to always act so impulsively and childishly, and this time there was no stopping the damage from spreading and affecting other people.
As Alex had expected, the photo had already spread around work. Eyes raised to stare at him as soon as the man pushed open the building’s front doors, dozens of pupils visually assaulting him and communicating countless different messages and reactions.
Individuals stopped and stared at him in clear disgust, while others smirked and raised their eyebrows suggestively. A gossiping huddle of young female interns giggled and whispered as Alex passed by, and the immigrant soon spotted the unwelcoming figures of John Adams, Charles Lee and James Reynolds grinning in his direction as he walked briskly forwards down the entrance’s corridor.
“Oi Hamilton, have fun with Jefferson last night?”
”That picture was something! Who knew Jeffershit was such a little gay slut!”
”Which one of you took it up the arse? You’d be the obvious guess, but I’d bet on closeted Jefferson having a thing for anal—“
Anxiety and adrenaline roared in Alexander’s ears as he strode past the continuous jeering, his mind focused on making it to Thomas’ office.
He had to explain himself to Jefferson. The man hadn’t deserved this, despite what had happened between the pair the previous night. Alexander knew that he’d never leak anyone’s nudes, and Thomas had to know that...
Immediately upon reaching the Virginian’s closed office door, Alex attempted to enter the office but was stopped when he realised that Thomas’ door was locked from the inside.
Well, at least he knew that Thomas was here.
Without any hesitation, Alexander drew back his fist and began knocking repeatedly upon the wood. His banging increased when only silence met his ears, and Alex’s rising levels of desperation caused him to call out in between knocks.
”Jefferson? Jefferson, it’s me! Open up, I need to talk to you! I know you’re in there, please open the door. Thomas? I need to talk to you! Thomas, open the door—“
The office door was flung open dynamically and so unexpectedly that Alex stumbled back slightly. The immigrant’s stomach plummeted with dread at the sight of a furious James Madison standing in the doorframe.
The man was around the same height as Alexander and usually expressed anything but intimidation, but Alex was taken aback by the man’s sudden change in physicality and aura. Madison was shaking slightly, his hands bawled into fists at his sides, and his expression of complete fury made Alex think that maybe it hadn’t been such a good idea to approach Thomas’ office after all...
”What the hell do you want, Hamilton?” Madison hissed, his words forced out brokenly as if the man was having difficulty controlling himself.
”I need to speak with Th—Jefferson” Alex said firmly, but James made no attempt to move out of Alexander’s way.
”You’ve got some nerve, coming here and acting as if you’ve got some unspoken right to speak with the person you’ve just humiliated. How did it make you feel, when you released that photo? Were you satisfied that you’d won and finally beaten your political rival? You’re pathetic. Did you even bother to think about how much real damage you were about to cause before you clicked send? I’m sure you’re loving this. You’re a fucking sociopath. Get the hell out of my sight.” James snarled, and Alex had never seen anyone so empowered with fury in the defensive of someone else.
The sight was almost paralysing, but Alex knew that he had to proclaim his innocence.
”Madison, let me in. I need to speak with him” Alexander stated, holding his ground as the shorter Virginian let out a humourless bark of laughter.
”Nothing you have to say could possibly make this situation alright. Come to redeem yourself? Beg for forgiveness? Or do you just want to brag? Come to enlighten us about how sending nudes can ruin a person’s life, or laugh about how you should ‘be careful about what you post online’?” James sneered.
However, just as Alex opened his mouth to retort and begin proclaiming his innocence, another person spoke from within the office that James was currently guarding.
“Jemmy, it’s okay. He..he can come in”