Chapter Text
AN: An Introduction, mostly.
xxx
At night, Kara dreams of Krypton.
Of the stillness in the depths of Argo City; of warped politics and fixed brigades. Guilds serving an alleged common purpose, a society content on damning itself. Rigid in outdated beliefs, stringent rules.
Memories bleed into one another. Flickers of dimming street corners, run down centers housing those no longer blessed by Rao’s light. And then red stones turned over, pavements bubbling with heat, screams rattling in her ears. The frazzled rambling of her mother, a thickness in her throat, apologies wrested from her father’s tongue. The guilty blues of Lara and Jor-El. Tiny Kal, a family estranged. Cramped space, a vast open empty existence.
Kara, displaced heir to the House of El.
Guildless, young, alone, afraid.
And then…
x
...and suddenly ‘Only Child Alex Danvers’ is no more and Alex, sleek with moss, slips into the role of ‘Big Sister’. Alex finds the title odd given the little she does know about Kara. They’re 16 and 17 respectively but trapped in the phantom realm for 24 years would mean that her foster sister is technically older than her.
Technically.
But Eliza and Jeremiah don’t seem to care about technicalities and plop Kara into the neat little box of ‘younger sibling’ without so much of a question towards the girl. No one ever stops to ask Kara what she wants, but Kara takes to the name with a subtle apathy that even Alex can appreciate. Blue eyes barely flicker as forged documents are shoved in Jeremiah’s hands from the Man of Steel himself.
It’s not long before the entire town knows of the ‘foreign’ girl who takes up residence in the Danvers household. Conversations with friends are soon sidelined to revolve around Kara. What it’s like to have a stranger living in her home, eating her food, sharing her space? A couple of people have made mention of Kara’s appearance, referencing her beauty from the brief trips she’s made in the market or the town square. Discomfort twists in Alex’s stomach at every passing comment.
Her orbit starts and ends with Kara. Kara’s needs, Kara’s grief. There’s no reprieve from it. Alex fades into the background of her own life until she’s an outline in the frame of a photo. It’s irritating. It’s humiliating. The worst part is that it’s not even Kara’s fault. Alex wishes she could be angry but she can’t find it in her to take issue with Kara herself. Not when Kara is mostly quiet. Withdrawn, introspective. Detached.
Weeks passed without change. They share a room but Kara spends most of the day out of it. At night Kara sits huddled up on the roof and watches the stars with an expression that borders misery. It’s the most emotion she ever sees from the other girl. Sympathy crawls up her throat at the sight of it. Alex starts to wonder then how she would handle losing her parents, her friends. Everything she could have had, could have been. An entire world of possibilities, gone.
The thought makes her ill.
It’s enough of a reason to at least try for courtesy.
x
Alex takes to observing Kara with narrowed eyes, carefully cataloging perceived likes and dislikes with a focus usually reserved for longstanding projects. Kara passes over her parents scientific journals and notebooks in disinterest, fills out math problems in seconds with a vague distaste that aligns with the behavior of someone from an advanced race. Nothing seems to capture Kara’s attention for long. There’s a minute interest in astrology before that too dissipates like a fine dust.
Frustrated with the lack of progress, Alex finds herself clicking through various channels before dropping the remote. A week prior, Kara had skimmed over episodes of Alex’s favorite shows with a thoughtful expression but gave nothing away.
Alex is at a loss on how to proceed. She sighs as she picks up her phone to respond to a text from Vicki. There’s a quiet intake of air that comes from the girl beside her. Alex looks over at Kara before glancing at the TV.
Animal Planet plays in the foreground, a documentary on lions that she’s seen half a dozen times already. Fascination lights up in spirals of blue as awe briefly veils the intensity of how Kara wears her sorrow.
Alex hums at the reaction before bowing her head.
x
"I'm going to the zoo,” Alex states one morning, voice layered with hesitation. She tugs nervously at the end of her sleeve as she gazes up at Kara from beneath her lashes. “Do you- I mean, there’s a new exhibit opening up. You could come." Alex shrugs a little at that last bit, hoping Kara doesn't comment on the nervous fluttering of her heart, the anxiety that’s surely draping her scent.
Head tilting, Kara regards her silently for a moment. Her gaze flickers and shifts and Alex shuffles restlessly in place. She opens her mouth to say ‘Nevermind, it’s stupid, you don’t have to go’ anything, anything to help stop the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach before Kara finally answers with a clear “Yeah” expression easing, furrow to pale brows thinning out. "Yeah, I’d like that."
Relief spills over Alex like a wave and she finds herself giving a jerky nod in response.
At the exhibit, Kara places a shaky palm on indistinct glass and Alex looks on with a fuzzy sort of happiness as a smile lifts up the corners of Kara’s mouth. She inches closer, their shoulders not quite touching and watches Kara watch black birds spread their wings.
x
Kara suffers from sensory overload. She had explained it once, halting and staggered, face pinched together in unease. The pain can be unbearable at times. The influx of sounds are like nails constantly drilled into the base of her skull. The air is polluted, festering, full of rot. Her eyes hurt from the artificial lights.
She experiences everything, all at once, always. Kara’s control strengthens with time until she grows taut with it. Reserved in every thing she does, careful of how she moves in the world. Mostly keeps her hands to herself, mindful of how even steel could crumble at her touch. These reservations extend to Alex before falling away like all things do between them.
It starts with a hand on her shoulder, a ruffling of hair, the smoothing of furrowed brows. Lazy Sunday mornings, quiet afternoons spent in.
At night Kara traces Kryptonian iconography into Alex’s skin, blue eyes enraptured and aglow with interest as Alex softens for her.
Countless trial and error.
Over time Kara learns that her hands can do more than bend and break the world around her.
“I love your body,” Kara confesses to her one morning, jolting Alex out of her drowsy state. Pale cheeks go aflame as Alex stares at Kara in wide eyed bewilderment. “You’re just,” Kara continues with a sigh, dark eyes sweeping over her attentively. “So soft, Alex, everywhere.”
The awe in Kara’s voice, so similar to how she sounded when they were at the zoo, makes Alex’s chest hurt.
Kara rambles on, “You remind me of the good parts of home. Things don’t hurt as much when I’m with you.” Kara peers up at Alex then before her eyes lower, “Is that…is that weird to say?” she hesitantly asks, touch faltering.
Flustered, Alex flattens herself against Kara’s front in lieu of an answer, nosing along Kara’s neck self-consciously. Embarrassed but pleased by the knowledge that she makes Kara as happy as Kara makes her.
Alex tugs purposefully at Kara’s arm, smiling at the small huff of laughter Kara releases before she’s wrapped up in a solid embrace.
x
“The class system humans have in place is beyond appalling, Alex,” Kara mentions one day, voice low, face screwed up in disgust. They’re halfway through an episode of Gossip Girl, possibly one of the worst offenders, when Kara says it. “All day long I have to hear these so called alpha’s growl and pant vile rhetoric. Completely aware of how their behavior upsets the omegas but uncaring, no, thriving on it. It's disgusting.”
Alex hums in acknowledgement, enjoying the comfort and pressure of Kara’s arm around her from beneath the blanket. The strength behind her foster sisters lithe frame, how Kara's arms marginally tighten around her the more animated she gets. Alex snuggles further into Kara's side as her shoulder lifts in a half shrug. “It is what it is, Kar. The system sucks, but there are people fighting to change it.” She tugs at Kara’s ear and gives a wry smile as dark blue eyes flicker towards her. “I’m going to be one of those people too, you know?”
Frowning, Kara holds her gaze for several long seconds before breaking it by drawing her closer. “I just hate the idea of anyone treating you like less than you deserve, Alex,” she murmurs into Alex’s hair. “I want you to be safe.”
Warmth settles low in Alex’s belly at that, makes her want to reach out and pull Kara on top of her. Be held down and protected and wrapped up in Kara's scent. The thought comes fast, hits hard, but flutters out almost as quickly. Alex bares her teeth playfully in response, “I’d bite it off before any of them could try it.”
Kara eyes her warily the rest of the night but it’s worth it for the initial shock of laughter that bounds from her foster sisters chest.
x
“So what exactly is Kara’s deal, Alex?”
Alex startles at the question, a hint of panic momentarily shading her eyes. She looks up to catch her friends staring at her with a shrewd eagerness that makes her nervous. It's phrased oddly but she knows what they want. She shifts her gaze. Alex knows that nothing good could come from their curiosity yet answers anyway. “I think she's an alpha," she replies in a steady voice before pausing. Is she though? Now that Alex takes a moment to consider it, she's actually not sure.
Kara doesn’t display any of the other common traits of an alpha. Well, common traits associated with human alpha’s, that is. Kara’s scent is the only thing that makes her read as such. Did Kryptonians even experience the same mating cycles as humans? Alex isn't sure. She thinks about Clark and how his scent had comforted her when she was younger, though not quite the same way it would have had he been a human omega. Does he go through estrus too? She wishes she had thought to ask, but the topic had never come up. Will Kara go through rut? Alex bites her lip at the idea.
A murmur goes around the table. Jensen, a tall, burly alpha Alex personally cannot stand, snorts loudly from where he’s seated. An unsubtle glee sparks in his vision as he crosses his arms. “You think, eh?” he drawls, chuckling heartily as Cameron, another alpha, elbows his side. Stephanie, the only other omega girl in their group, whistles low as Veronica, a beta, smirks beside her. Alex looks around, unsure how to process their reactions. It’s only when she notices Vicki, her alpha best friend, eyeing her dubiously that Alex starts to tense.
“You're living with an unmarked alpha and your parents are okay with you two sharing a room?” Vicki asks, skepticism darkening her gaze.
Alex hears the implication loud and clear. Humiliation and anger burn a path in her chest. Alex’s hand tightens on her fork, mouth turning down unhappily. Of course, of course their minds would jump straight to that. Alpha’s and omega’s can’t coexist without the compulsion to mate, knot, breed ruining any semblance of friendship before it can start.
Sighing, Alex sets her fork down and straightens with authority. “Kara is my sister,” she starts slowly. “Blood related or not, we’re more than our natures. All of us are.” She meets their gazes one by one, daring any of them to deny it. "And I don't know about you guys, but I'd like to be seen as more than just a stereotype."
Vicki and Cameron have the decency to look guilty, knowing how delicate a subject it can be, but Jensen only rolls his eyes in response. “Yeah, yeah, Danvers, we get it with the SJW shit.” Jensen sniffs before turning to Cameron with a grin.“You see that movie last night, Cam?”
Topic dropped. Subject changed.
Alex frowns down at her plate as she tries to understand the heat curling in her stomach that involuntarily spreads at the thought of anything involving her and Kara
x
“My mother and father and I were Guildless, for a time.” Alex looks up from her textbook in surprise, glancing over at her foster sister with furrowed brows. Kara lays flat on her back, staring up at the ceiling with a disinterest that reminds Alex of Kara’s first months on Earth.
It had been a particularly rough couple of days. Kara’s control had slipped, only for a moment, but the influx of well, everything, had been enough to incapacitate her. Kara had ended up slumped over in the middle of town square, panic attack in full motion. Alex had been miles away, surfing with Vicki and a few boys from school. She hadn’t heard about it until later that day, when one of her friends had mentioned in passing that some of their classmates had seen her foster sister freak out earlier and, well... Kara had disappeared after that and the blame had then been shifted to Alex.
What had Kara been doing alone? Why weren’t you there with her, for her? How could you let this happen, Alexandra?
The same mantra, different day.
Now they were both grounded. Kara for disappearing, Alex for not being a good enough sister, because she was never good enough in her parents eyes. Her worry wars with her feelings of failure until the worry wins out completely.
Setting her pen down, Alex pushes out of her seat and ambles over to Kara’s side of the room. She plops down on the bed next to her, curls into her side but doesn’t touch. Alex patiently waits for Kara to gather her thoughts. Kara doesn’t often speak about her life before Earth.
“My aunt Astra had come to my mother one day and spoke of Kyrpton’s inevitable destruction.” Kara’s voice is tight, restrained. “The core was unstable. We had mined it for its resources to the point where it was no longer able to sustain itself. My mother was dismissive of my aunt’s concerns at first. They fought. My aunt left. I didn’t see her again for days.” Kara pauses then, inhales shakily as she attempts to collect herself. “I don’t know what happened exactly but my mother must have believed my aunt eventually. She went to my father and convinced him of the same. They spoke to the Council but...but it was too late.”
Alex reaches out then, eases forward into Kara’s frame and settles a palm on her stomach. Kara visibly shudders and covers Alex’s hand with her own, squeezing lightly. Kara sniffles and continues, “My uncle Non had murdered a guard. The Council believed my parents to have conspired with them, or at least had knowledge of the matter. When my father had gone to my Uncle Jor-El to plead for amnesty, to have Jor-El speak on behalf of my mother and I, Jor-El had turned him away. My parents were stripped of their rank and we were cast out of the House of El.”
“Kara…”
“For four years we lived in the worst part of Argo City. We made due but I...it could be rough, at times.” Kara swallows and blinks back tears. “It could be rough, but my mother and father loved me. Loved each other, still, despite everything. I had friends, Alex. I miss them every day,” she sniffs, lifting a hand to rub furiously at her eyes. “I wish I had died with them on Krypton.”
"No." The word escapes Alex urgently; a soft noise of protest. “Don’t say that,” she murmurs, curling in and around Kara, blanketing her entirely. “Your parents sent you here because they wanted you to live, Kara.” She pushes up on her elbow to lean over and press a tender kiss to fluttering eyelids. “And you have. You’re so strong. Not just physically. You’ve adapted, you’ve survived.” Alex fingers slide along Kara’s cheek before she cups it gently. “You’re a fighter, Kara Zor-El. So live,” she quietly implores. “Keep living. For yourself, for them.” Alex brushes her palm along tear-stained skin as she waits for Kara to meet her gaze. Peering into dark swirls of blue, Alex feels something in her stomach tighten and heave. She swallows thickly. “For me too, okay?”
It takes a moment but eventually Kara nods, resigned, but staring at her with an intensity that makes Alex’s chest burn and...
x
...and Kara finds herself annoyed mostly. She’s a stranger in a strange land trapped in a familiar body that doesn’t behave like her own. Things break and shatter around her if she stops focusing for even a second. She feels the rustling of baser instincts coiled deep inside, knows the meaning behind it and dreads what will happen when they come to fruition. The loss of status had meant loss of benefits that came with it, which had included the delicate process of muting those urges and tempering them into something neat and orderly.
The Yellow Sun only heightens a need that would have been manageable on Krypton. Kara knows it won't be long before that longing to bare her teeth and pump herself into slick heat burns through her. The idea of it makes her nauseated with grief and exhaustion. Another way she's dissimilar from the heritage she once held so dear.
It starts slowly but soon she starts to notice honeyed scents, the appealing quality of soft viable omegas who would open so sweetly for her. One omega in particular, really. She grits her teeth at the recurring thought and turns on her side. Her foster sister shifts in bed behind her, follows her movements in a sleepy cadence. Alex plants her arms firmly around Kara’s stomach, hums faintly in Kara’s ear before slipping back into unconsciousness, none the wiser to the turmoil brewing deep in the marrow of Kara’s bones.
Fatigue heightens shallow breathing. It’ll be another restless night.
Kara is mindful in the way she slides out of bed, careful not to jostle Alex as she extracts herself from her foster sisters hold. She gazes down at Alex intently, brushes the pad of her fingers along a sloped nose and the curve of an angled jaw before releasing a shuddery breath. Picking up her pillow, she sets it where the imprint of her body once lay and watches in amusement as Alex buries herself in the lingering scent. Kara floats across the room to grab her cellphone and make her way downstairs.
She calls Kal.
Clark, Kal-El, Superman, the Symbol of Truth, and Justice. Kara’s not sure what to make of her cousin. She doubts she would have gotten the chance to actually get to know him back on Krypton, so his disinterest in her barely registers most days. Kara does wonder sometimes what life could have been like if they had landed at the same time. How would she have gone about raising a child in a foreign land? Her parents had sprung the idea on her without stopping to consider her feelings on the matter. Not that she can really blame them, given the extreme circumstances.
Still, he’s family. They share blood. That had meant something once. Kara wishes she could find significance in the concept. Her father and Jor-El shared blood too. Blood bonds can only go so far, she supposes.
Clark answers on the third ring, a cautious ‘Hello?’ as he holds the phone to his ear. Kara sighs and greets him.
"Clark,” she starts, hoping the use of his human names mitigates any potential defensiveness. “I need to ask you about how you handled...” She reaches up to grip the necklace her mother left her in an attempt to ground herself. “Your coming to age.”
Kara hears the confused intake of air, can practically sense her cousins immediate discomfort and can’t help but rolls her eyes at it. She listens closely as Clark eventually finds his footing and stammers his way through an explanation.
“-overall, it will be different for you, Kara,” he sniffs as he concludes the curt retelling of his own formative years. “You’ll have to regulate your strength when you’re inside, mostly, but no one should notice. Omegas expect alphas to be able to overpower them,” he mutters with no small amount of bitterness. For a moment, Kara mourns for the lost boy who never experienced a society where you were valued for more than what’s between your legs. Clark will never truly be Kal-El, a son of the great House of El, descendant to the legion of omega scions who had held high ranking positions on Krypton.
She thanks him quietly and hangs up the phone. Kara wanders over to the kitchen and pulls out a large bowl from the cabinet. She fills it mindlessly to the brim with milk and cereal and chews slowly on her food as she considers the implications of being an alpha in a society already rife with prejudice and strife.
What kind of hurt will she impart if she was to give into her wants?
Kara can only shudder at the possibilities.
x