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Iruka counts, breathing as slowly and deeply as she can: this time she only reaches nine before the next contraction hits, leaving her thoughtless, gasping as she tries to ride the wave of pain, to push, to remember all the advice Sakura and Shizune and Tsunade have given her, to keep from yelling.
“Okay,” she manages, a moment later, “that was sooner. Someone tell me that’s a good thing.” When she opens her eyes, Kakashi is even more pale than she’d been a few moments before, but she nods, squeezing Iruka’s hand.
“Yeah,” she replies hoarsely, glancing across at Tenzo, standing on Iruka’s other side. “Yeah, that’s a good thing.”
Sakura ducks in the door, pulling her hair back and shoving impatiently at her hitae-ate, and Iruka opens her mouth to ask her — and another contraction hits. Unprepared, Iruka yelps, squeezing Kakashi and Tenzo’s hands hard and trying to focus on pushing, pushing, pushing. When it ebbs, she pants for breath, not bothering to open her eyes again.
“Why the fuck did I think this was a good idea?” she asks, rhetorically, and then: “If I ever volunteer to do this again, someone needs to smack me, because it sucks.” Kakashi makes an apologetic noise, and Iruka squints up at her just as another contraction hits.
“Don’t worry,” Tsunade says, distantly. “Everyone says that.” Her words float just above the pain, and Iruka tries to shake her head. She doesn’t care: everyone is right.
Finally an angry-sounding yell echoes in the small room.
“Iruka,” Kakashi says, and she sounds a little breathless, “it’s a girl.” Iruka blinks and tries to focus her eyes, gasping instead.
“Hey,” Tsunade says, poking Iruka in the hip, “don’t quit on me now, kid — you’re only halfway done.”
“Actually —“ Sakura starts, and Tsunade waves a hand at her, motioning her to keep her hands spread across Iruka’s belly. “Right. Okay, Iruka-sensei, come on, push.”
Iruka does, again, wondering how on earth anyone can think women are soft when they do this — and wondering at the women who do this more than once, voluntarily.
The baby is crying again, and Iruka wants so badly to get up and take her away from whoever is making her so angry, but when she tries to move, to sit up, Tsunade’s hands hold her still better than any set of hospital restraints.
“Not yet,” Tsunade says, “she’s fine.”
“Cresting,” Shizune says clearly, and Sakura increases the chakra-flow from her hands, soothing the pain a little even as it peaks again. Iruka closes her eyes and hangs on hard to Kakashi and Tenzo’s hands, pushing as hard as she can and hoping this will be over soon, so soon.
“Come on, Iruka-sensei,” one of them says, “come on, focus. One more, then you get to see both of them, okay?”
She wants to yell at them, if it’s that easy, you do it, but she doesn’t have the breath. Instead she just gasps and pushes and hopes she’s not breaking any fingers. It seems like an eternity before a second voice joins the crying, and someone pushes Iruka to lie back before putting a baby, then two in her arms.
“You’re so small,” Iruka marvels, looking down at the infants lying on her belly, arms looped under each of them just in case they might move and slide off. “You’re so very tiny, both of you.” She looks up, and it feels like she’ll split her face wide from smiling. “Look, Kakashi, look at her little fingers.” She looks up at Tenzo, who’s joined Kakashi on her right. "Can you believe it? Look at them!”
One of the infants stirs — Asuka, Iruka thinks, trying out the name — and begins moving her head from side to side, brushing against Iruka’s chest.
“She’s hungry,” Shizune says, walking up behind Kakashi and pushing between her and Tenzo. “You’re planning on breastfeeding, right? So you should … here.” She helps pull Asuka up so she can reach Iruka’s nipple, pulling the hospital gown out of the way and showing Iruka how to be sure she’s positioned correctly, how to hold her breast in place. Asuka butts at Iruka’s breast again, seeming to find her nipple by touch, rather than sight. She starts mouthing at it after a moment of seeking, seemingly content to gum at it even though it doesn’t feel like she’s getting any milk.
“But she’s not —“ Iruka starts, concerned.
“It’s all right,” Shizune tells her, voice reassuring and steady, “she’ll get the hang of it in a minute. And if she doesn’t, then we’ll show her. It’s good for her to practice.”
“But,” Iruka says, a new worry dawning as she looks down at her other baby, who’s wiggling his arms a little but otherwise not moving, “Daiki — he’s not —“
“Don’t worry,” Shizune says, “he’s a little newer than his sister. And they’ll go at their own pace, regardless.”
Iruka looks down at the two of them lying naked on top of her, little and warm and still an almost angry red from head to toe, with tiny scrunched-up faces. These are my babies she thinks, and then no, these are Kakashi’s babies, and Tenzo’s, and mine.
The idea that she might have agreed to go through this and then give these babies up is suddenly unthinkable, now that she’s seen them, felt them taking little breaths against her, their tiny chests moving up and down, so warm.
Kakashi reaches out one ungloved hand and cups the back of Asuka’s head gently, traces a line down Daiki’s back.
“They’re amazing, Iruka,” she says. “You’re so amazing. Look at them.” Behind her, Tenzo confers briefly with Shizune, and then makes a series of swift signs, pulling two chairs out of the ground for him and Kakashi so they can lean close. As he sits down, Daiki opens his mouth and starts to fuss, shaking his head a little and wiggling against her.
“Um,” Iruka says, because Shizune’s just left — it’s the three of them in the room now. She can’t hold Asuka in place and move Daiki up at the same time. “Can you just hold her —“ two sets of hands reach out, and Iruka lets them steady Asuka, who looks up and then latches on, and there, Iruka can feel the difference clearly when the milk starts to flow.
“Oh!” Iruka exclaims, and in an instant Kakashi’s standing, Tenzo steadying Asuka and checking that Iruka’s all right. “No,” Iruka says, before Kakashi can rush out and alarm some poor nurse, “no, it’s okay. Sit down. She just figured it out, that’s all. It feels a little odd.” She smiles at Tenzo, who looks like his heart rate might be returning almost to normal, and tugs Daiki into place, holding her breast still while he nuzzles at her. Unlike his sister, he latches on right away, and Iruka makes sure he’s really set before letting go gradually, and wrapping her arms under the two of them again. It’s awkward, but she really doesn’t care right now: she wants the both of them close.
“Look,” she says again, though she needn’t bother: Tenzo and Kakashi are both watching her like their lives depend on it. Iruka might ordinarily be uncomfortably with such rapt attention, but she’s too busy with the infants in her arms, checking their tiny little hands and feet, feeling them wriggle a little against her.
“They’re incredible,” Tenzo says quietly, and if his voice is a little choked up, well, no one here is going to call him on it. Iruka can feel tears welling up, and blinks them back. See, mom, dad, she thinks, you’ve got grandkids now, after all.
Then she really does start crying, and Kakashi and Tenzo lean forward, alarmed.
“No,” Iruka says again, “no, I’m just happy.” She nods to beckon them closer and kisses each of them warmly, tears still wet on her cheeks. “I’m just so happy.”
Asuka and Daiki fall asleep soon enough, and Iruka motions to Kakashi and Tenzo: Tenzo picks up Asuka; Kakashi hops up on the bed beside Iruka and wraps an arm around Iruka’s shoulders, pulling her close and spreading her hand across Daiki’s back as he dozes in Iruka’s arms. Iruka leans into her and feels Kakashi pull the baby from her arms just as she falls asleep.