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Dirk and Jake's Unconventional Guide to the Supernatural

Summary:

Now that the war is over and all three dimension are finally at peace, Dirk decides it's finally time to tie the knot.

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Énouement

 

Dirk can't help the slight chuckle that came to him as Jake overlooked the city of Dis from one of the tallest buildings, the spiraling obsidian towers carved with runes and accented with shining onyx and deep ruby. Almost the entire sixth circle is visible from the tower Jake had chosen as theirs, and much of Dis is being rebuilt from the destruction of the revolution.

"What are you laughing about?" Jake asks, turning to Dirk with a light smile, emerald eyes bright and full of a calm kind of contentment that echoes in his emotions.

"You're just cute. Its like you've never seen The City before," Dirk replies, stepping forward to wrap his arms around Jake's waist.

Jake huffs a bit, crossing his arms. "Well excuse me for admiring our home. And for your information, mister two-and-a-half-centuries-old, I actually haven't seen Dis since it was essentially destroyed during a battle."

"Hey, woah, I'm only two and a quarter. I ain't no old man," Dirk defendes, grinning as Jake bites back a laugh.

"You're most certainly an old man," Jake replies, turning to lean back against Dirk's chest, eyes drawn back to The City's sprawling landscape of spirals and dark towers. It really is pretty stunning, seeing the dim, violet light of the never-changing sky of the sixth circle reflect off the buildings, bathing the entire city in ethereal reds and royal blues. Everything is always dark yet thriving in an almost living way in Dis, and Dirk does have to admit that its probably both the most and least supernatural-seeming circle at the same time.

Time is ever so slightly faster here than on Earth, and now that there is monitored passage from Derse to the human realm with trustworthy demons- and even humans who sometimes entered Hell just because they could -things are calmer, the circles aren't as crowded, and it seems all three dimensions; Derse, Prospit, and Earth; are all at peace more than they ever have been before. Of course, passage between Prospit and Derse is still monitored closely, but with the new, more democratic, ruling system that Dirk has reluctantly taken charge of, everyone in Derse is less stressed, and somehow that translated to actually having mercy on the Prospitians who dared to venture across the Acheron. Even those with runes had been at risk of being destroyed before the revolution, but it seems that the contact between dimensions had become far more diplomatic after Harley had stepped in to help them finish the coup.

Lucy still isn't very happy about being usurped, but he does approve of the strides Dersian politics had made, along with the new diplomacy between Earth and Derse, and Derse and Prospit. Now that the supernatural is common knowledge to those on Earth, it isn't unusual for topics to arise in public as to a person's species; questions on which breed, which category, how high their rank. The first time Jake had been asked, he turned into a stammering mess, but it quickly became perfectly acceptable to question an acquaintance on their species and other personal details that had previously been considered taboo.

Dirk had been surprised at how quickly the knowledge of the supernatural had been integrated into human society, and it wasn't uncommon for two beings of different species to openly speak of such things. Clubs had been established in a very short amount of time to accommodate the meeting of different species- and the fulfilment of each species needs. The more... Risqué clubs were focused mainly on sirens and demons of incubus and succubus breed or recent decent.

Dirk realized quickly enough that it took quite a courageous human to brave such a place, and even Dirk had been quickly overwhelmed by the pure atmosphere of lust. It was almost too much to handle, and Roxy had wound up dragging he and Jake away after only a few minutes inside.

How the staff dealt with such a place, Dirk has no idea. He grins at the thought that they just all must be asexuals.

Surprisingly, being the democratic leader of an entire dimension came with some nice perks, and no one but Lucy argued when he and Jake restructured how souls are handled. The souls in the Harpy woods were freed to the first and the wraths were sent there instead, the sullen allowed out of their muddy pit of despair into the higher circles of their choice, and only the worst offenders are now kept in the active zones.

Outside Derse, Dirk was also called to meet with a number of Earth's world leaders to discuss new relations as everyone slowly adjusted to the new species coexistence. Initially, he had been met with hostility, but upon explaining the needs of the Dersian population, that hostility ebbed into tolerance, and the people of most developed countries had been surprisingly amicable. More religious areas were a little harder to come to a place of acceptance, but upon learning many of their neighbors and coworkers were among the Dersian people, tensions began to settle. Hunter troupes are still doubtful, and altercations still happen, but for the most part its turned from vigilante justice into policing the more traditional demons to keep everything balanced.

Over all, Dirk is pleasantly surprised with how things are going.

Drawing him from his thoughts is Jake, glancing up at him and sending a mere questioning glance as to his quiet demeanor.

"Sorry, I was just thinking," Dirk explains, and Jake gives him a 'no shit' expression.

"You seem to be doing quite a lot of that lately," Jake tells him.

"Yeah, well, thanks to your stupid ass getting me stuck in a leadership position, I have a lot to think about," Dirk's tone is joking, one hand moving up to card through Jake's hair. Its soft as usual, though it has become quite a bit more curly since the time they first met, and Dirk can't help but love that- its almost like there's more of it for him to pet through. He really loves playing with Jake's hair, no matter how corny it seems to others. Soft and thick and a deep, almost black, chocolate color. It contrasts beautifully against his eyes; a stunning emerald green that had intensified tenfold since Jake had turned.

Dirk loves his eyes.

"Yes, well, perhaps if you hadn't suggested a democratic system, I wouldn't have suggested you take a place in leadership for the next century," Jake says, and Dirk has to take a moment to shuffle through his thoughts to remember just what brought Jake to that response.

"Its gonna be a fucking long century," Dirk sighs, and Jake just smiles up at him.

"Well, at least you won't be stuck alone," Jake reminds Dirk, who smirks, fingers moving down to trace over Jake's ear lightly. When Jake squirmes and squeaks out that it tickled, Dirk leans down and nips lightly at the shell of his ear.

"Yeah, 'cause you're my queen, right?" He asks, and Jake makes an indignant sound, shoving away from him with a laugh.

"Quit tickling me! I swear, Strider, were I a queen, the very definition would have to change!"

Grinning, Dirk recaptures his mate, going after Jake's stomach and sides and grinning at the way Jake writhes and laughs at the tickle attack. "Hell no, I'll tickle you into next week."

"W-what is it with you and-," Jake cuts. himself off with a shriek as Dirk tickles over his ribs "-ah! Not there, D-Dirk! Quit it! Ahhh! Noooo! It ti-tickles!"

"That's the point," Dirk tells him, but Jake eventually manages to wriggle out of his grasp.

"Y-you," Jake starts as he frees himself, arms crossing protectively over his stomach and sides "You are just terrible! If I didn't know you better I might suppose you had some sort of—of tickle fetish!"

"'Tickle' and 'fetish' aren't words that should go together in a single sentence, Jake."

Jake sticks his tongue out, but he's fighting back a smile, and Dirk can't help but grin at how hard Jake is trying just to keep it contained. "Well, still. You seem obsessed with tickling me, and it is exceptionally obnoxious!"

Dirk shrugs, grinning. "Well, you're fuckin' adorable, so how could I not be obsessed with making you squeak?"

"You rapscallion! I do not squeak!" Jake cries, shaking a fist at Dirk.

"You totally squeak."

"Absolutely not!"

"You so do." Jake crosses his arms tighter and gives Dirk a grumpy look. "Oh, come on, you have to admit you're adorable."

"I am ferocious, born of hunter's blood, and I will admit no such thing!"

Dirk wraps his arms around Jake, pulling him close. "Okay, okay, I'll quit bugging you. I do have a question, though."

"I managed to finally get your grandma's blessing." Jake gives him a suspicious look when he pulls back again, reaching into his pocket. That suspicion turns to shock when Dirk drops to one knee, pulling out a ring box. "I want to spend the rest of our lives together, to get a house once all of this leadership shit is over and just be normal with you. Will you marry me?"

Jake quite literally tackles him to the ground, blubbering some unintelligible bullshit between kisses before finally managing, with tears in his eyes, "Yes you damned fool, I love you, of course I'll marry you!"

"Wanted to take you to a fancy place or something, but we're kinda stuck here until everything is sorted out and back to normal again."

Jake laughs at him, rubbing his eyes before dragging Dirk in for another kiss.

After a few months, the circles have been rebuilt and Dirk takes a temporary leave to make wedding plans, leaving decisions to Karkat for the time being.

Jake had come with him, all but attached to him at the hip, and the first place they stop is Jake's grandmother's house. She congratulates him and formally welcomes Dirk to the family. It feels like a battle won in and of itself when she calls him son and hugs him.

Dirk wants to cry, and when he turns to look at Jake, his mate has tears streaming down his cheeks, a wide smile on his face as he pulls them both in for a group hug.

When they stop at Jake's uncle's house to see John, even John's father welcomes him as an honorary Egbert, noting with only mild disdain that Dirk is still not quite a gentleman. Dirk slaps him on the shoulder and tells him to lighten up, high fiving John when he gushes about his and Vriska's first anniversary. Jake congratulates him, and John asks if he's Jake's best man, to which Jake rolls his eyes and replies that obviously he is. Dirk chimes in with a grin that Roxy is his best man, and Jake snorts at him.

After visiting everyone to invite them to the wedding, Dirk takes Jake to the small seamstress shop Kanaya owns to get fit for their tuxes. Kanaya chats idly with them about their plans as she measures Jake, saying she already has Dirk's measurements from Rose, and his mate laughs lightly at the preparation. She questions them separately about color choices, and when she's satisfied with the information she's gathered, she shoos them out to get to work, telling the duo to send Roxy next.

The next few weeks is a blur of making plans and securing a venue and different services. Jane volunteers to make the wedding cake, and they accept, though she says she'll surprise them on what kind of cake. Jade takes care of the flowers, her little shop alight with activity as soon as they invite her, closed to the public for a short time as she gets everything ready.

Before they know it, the day is here, and Jake all but shakes with excitement as they approach the little park gazebo venue just before sunset. Dirk leans over to leave a little kiss on his cheek, looking over the rows of empty chairs. They're early, like they're supposed to be, and Dirk's brother meets them there with a camera, flash temporarily stunning them both when he seems to come out of nowhere. Dave drags a reluctant Dirk into a horrifyingly tight bear hug, followed by a noogie that has the younger Strider all but screaming profanities as he bats his brother away.

Jake barely restrains laughter at the sight of him when he lands a punch to Dave's jaw and wiggles away. His hair is a mess now, and Rose makes a disgruntled sound as she pushes Dave to the side and comes to fix it. Dirk lets her, despite his half hearted protests, and she gives him a gentle smack to the shoulder when he says he can do it himself.

"This is a special day for you, the least I can do as your adoptive mother is fix your hair," she argues, and he goes quiet, seeming to enjoy the way she brushes through it and shapes it back to its usual sculpted, gravity-defying spikes. Dirk smiles lightly at her when she sweeps his bangs to the side with her long nails, a look of pride on her face.

She squeezes his shoulders lightly, patting him on the cheek, and says, "Don't let him do that again, or I'll be the next of his close friends to send him back to Derse."

Dirk rolls his eyes, catching Jake's extended hand when he stands, his mate pulling him along into the gazebo. Jade has trellises along the inner walls, covered in bright orange and blue tie dye roses, and Jake stares at them, turning slowly.

"Golly," he manages, voice breathy. "Its beautiful."

Dirk kisses him on the forehead as he looks over the beautiful flowers lining dark oak pillars. "Jade really out-did herself this time, huh, baby?"

Jake nods, watching the petals sway in the breeze, some falling away to litter the wooden deep chocolate floor boards in vibrant colors. Its stunning, and he's swept up in the beauty of it for a long moment as Dirk watches him take everything in.

Jane's voice breaks them out of their moment, calling to them as she carries an extremely large cake, Roxy following close behind to keep it steady whenever it wobbles in her grasp. "Oh! You two! Come here! Come on, come on! We have to get a few photos before I drop this!"

"You won't drop it," Roxy laughs, taking it from her, and Jane rolls her eyes, embracing Dirk and Jake when they get close enough. "Yo, Dave! Get over here, camera dude! Where's the fuckin' table for this thing? Heavy ass cake."

Dave drags a little circular table with him as he heads over, setting it near the gazebo and directing Roxy over. Once she sets the cake down, she drags the three of them into a hug and poses for Dave to take their picture.

It's not long after sunset that Kanaya arrives, four plastic clothing bags in one arm, a large gift bag in the other, and Porrim trails behind and her, both in sleek, black, form-fitting dresses, accented with emerald green.

Dave greets them as he strings jar lights across the sitting area, lighting up the inside of the gazebo with the same little hanging glass cylinders. Little brass lanterns light the isle between the rows of white wooden chairs, leading to the gazebo, and Roxy claps when he plugs the extension chord in and sends little balls of light scattering across the grass. The jar lights swing gently in breeze, making the gazebo seem ethereal as colors bounce across the wood from the lights that sit just behind the flowers. Swirling circles of blue, green, and orange fill the little structure, and Jake again approaches it, eyes taking in the now even more stunning set up.

Dirk remains where he is, watching from afar as lights bounce off of Jake as he turns and looks at everything, eventually stopping to stare down the isle into the rows of empty chairs. His eyes eventually land on Dirk's, and Dirk can feel the affection in his stare, green eyes soft and shining wetly, and Dirk is sure Jake's going to cry when they actually start if he's already so emotional.

Once Jake is over his awe of their little venue, he returns to Dirk, the two welcoming their guests as they arive, family and friends slowly taking their places in the chairs.

Jake's grandmother arrives last, pulling her grandson into a tight hug and kissing him on the cheek when he laughs at her show of affection. She turns to Dirk next, and he leans down to accept a kiss as well, smiling lopsidedly when she pats him on the cheek instead.

"Not yet, Strider. Someday, but I'm not an old enough bird yet to kiss you," Grandma English says, though she does give him a hug. "You have enough ego as it stands, a kiss from me would just go straight to your big head."

"Yeah, okay. Don't give yourself so much credit," he replies, rolling his eyes, and she shakes a fist at him jokingly before taking a seat next to John in the front row.

Kanaya ushers them behind a little curtain one at a time to change into their suits after Roxy and Jane had changed into the dresses she made for them. They're beautiful, both wearing two different signature colors, Dirk's and Jake's favorites, respectively.

Jane's is a poofy little cerulean and green dress, and Roxy's is a sleek, orange and black short skirted, strapless dress. Jake catches sight of John as he heads over to them as he and Dirk exit the little ring of curtains, wearing a cerulean tuxedo, not unlike Jake's own. He claps them both with palm-tingling high-fives, and Dirk smiles at him.

They bicker a bit before Jane pushes Roxy up toward the gazebo, the girls standing on either side, and John jogs over to them, standing beside Jane. Hal appears out of nowhere, dressed in his own orange and black tux, and stands beside Roxy.

Dirk takes his hand, smiling, and pulls him down the isle of their friends and family, Dave snapping pictures as they go. Vaguely, Jake wonders if their past selves are sitting in those few empty chairs in the back right now, and he glances back at the last row just before they enter the gazebo.

This is the beginning of their life together-- their not-so-normal normal life. They can be domestic together, maybe foster some kids, go explore the world, and not worry about wars or anything past Dirk's leadership in Derse.

Jake decides when that term is over, he wants to live in the woods with Dirk. Just the two of them.

Forever.