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Language:
English
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Published:
2020-05-28
Words:
373
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
4
Kudos:
4
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2
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64

jebediah hammy

Summary:

Hamlet comes out to his boyfriend.

Notes:

i wrote this while watching gallipoli (1981) so sorry about any homoerotic wwi australian cowboy influences that might've slipped in

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Hamlet picked up the small chain necklace from where it was resting on the table. He treasured it; Handsome Jack had gotten it for him when they went to Hot Topic for their third anniversary. It was beautiful, but it was just another piece of jewelry he'd have to get rid of. 

Hamlet sighed, dropping it into his pocket. He couldn't bear to part with it, not quite yet. As he did there was the familiar noise of a diamond pony being tied to the fence post outside. The door swung open and the telltale sound of the Telltale Games character arriving home, the loud honk of a clown's noise, echoed through the house. It was really just a group of rooms in Handsome Jack's giant space apartment that had been outfitted to match with both of their unique aesthetic tastes. 

"Hey, sweetjart," Jack called. "I'm gnome!" 

"You're gnome?" Hamlet asked as he got up and headed into the living room. "You're my gnomey boy?" 

Jack nodded and grinned. "That I am." 

They embraced each other and kissed. It was kind of uncomfortable, as Jack's mask was made of unmalleable plastic, but Hamlet had long since learned to overlook that. 

Eventually, the two parted and Jack tilted his head. "This morning, you said you wanted to talk to me?" he asked.

Hamlet nodded somewhat sheepishly and composed himself, running a hand through his hair. Ever since the Hot Dog Incident, they'd been working on developing their mutual communication skills. Part of this involved Hamlet telling Jack when he needed to talk about something instead of finding dead skulls and giving them speeches.

"Jack, I have to tell you something, and it's... it's important," Hamlet said. "I've been questioning it for a while, but I think I've finally decided... I'm Amish." 

Hamlet couldn't see Handsome Jack's reaction because of his fixed plastic mask. This was part of the reason why they had communication issues. Swallowing down his anxiety, Hamlet continued.

"I know this isn't, like, sexy of me, but-" 

"Shh shh shh," Jack cut him off. "You'll always be sexy to me, baby, no matter what." 

"Really?" Hamlet asked.

"Of course," Handsome Jack said handsomely, "you'll always be my sexy little amishlet." Hamlet grinned.

Notes:

all eyes on me handsome jack borderlands animatic