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Lately, Atsumu has come to the realization that Osamu and Hinata sometimes hang out without him.
Which, for the record, he’s totally fine with. Except—except it’s weird, because Atsumu was technically friends with Hinata first, and he was the one who introduced him to Osamu, and he knows it’s not a hard and fast rule or anything, but shouldn’t he technically be invited because he started this whole thing in the first place? He knows that Osamu and Hinata strangely get along like a house on fire, but he's not sure if that's just Hinata's natural magnetism or some actual chemistry between the two of them. Never mind that Atsumu and Hinata actually do have crazy chemistry both on and off the court, so he should technically also be hanging out with Hinata a lot more. All the same, he’s completely fine with it. He's twenty-three years old, so he's not upset. He's not jealous, either. He’s not.
“You sure?” Bokuto says, actually sounding thoughtful for once. “Kinda sounds like you’re jealous to me.”
"Kinda sounds like you're being gross," Sakusa says, picking at his food.
Atsumu doesn't really know when he'd started hanging out with the two weirdest people on his team, but it's become a bit of a regular thing now. It's become much more regular since he's started volunteering to pay for expensive sushi. The two of them kind of balance each other out, he'd told Osamu. Osamu had scoffed. Weird can't balance out weird, he'd said.
Maybe Osamu's right. Atsumu sighs, picks up a piece of toro and shoves it in his mouth. It comforts him just a little. "I'm not jealous," he says through a mouthful of raw fish. "Why would I be jealous?"
"Maybe because Hinata's compliments make up the backbone of your self-esteem," Sakusa says, "and you don't like sharing his attention with anyone."
Bokuto nods, grins. "Yeah! Maybe that."
"What?" Atsumu says, insulted. "That is not true—”
"It kind of is," says Bokuto, as innocently as ever. "You're always fishing for compliments around him. Like—oh, like, Shouyou-kun, how was that set? when you know it was perfect, and Shouyou-kun, look at this serve—”
He's really starting to hit the nail on the head, and it simultaneously makes Atsumu uncomfortable and annoyed. "Okay, I get it, I get it. Just stop imitating me."
"Bokuto's right," Sakusa says, looking up darkly. "Sometimes, when he compliments one of us, you have to jump in there and make it about you. It's annoying. You should stop."
Atsumu doesn't even know how to respond to that, but he opens his mouth to retort anyways. "I—”
"I mean," Bokuto says, cutting him off, "it's fine, isn't it?" He takes a sip of his beer. "It's not like you've never been jealous of your brother before. I'd be jealous too if my brother was hanging out with the guy I liked all the time—”
"Wait, wait," Atsumu says, reeling. "Hold on. What did you just say?"
"I said," Bokuto says, looking a little confused, "I'd be jealous too if my brother was hanging out with the guy I liked all the time."
His statement hits Atsumu like a train. He laughs, a little nervously. "Shouyou's not—” Even as he says it, he realizes he's learning something about himself. "I don't—" He frowns. "Do I?"
"You don't?" Bokuto asks, looking genuinely nonplussed. He shares a glance with Sakusa. "You're so clingy with him—we were sure—”
"Yeah," Sakusa says, narrowing his eyes. "On top of everything else, you ogle him sometimes. It's downright indecent. I feel bad for Shouyou-kun."
"I do not ogle anyone," Atsumu retorts. He crosses his arms. "I just… I just look. Respectfully. Because he's good-looking, and I enjoy…" He trails off, thinking about Hinata's legs, and feels his face warm. The evidence is really stacking up.
"Don't tell me you've only realized it now," Sakusa says, disbelief in his voice.
"Shut up," Atsumu says, hiding his face in his hands. His voice is muffled. "Shut up. I'm obviously going through something, you insensitive bastard."
Sakusa huffs, but says nothing.
Atsumu thinks back on his time with Hinata. Yes, he's attracted to him physically, but he'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who doesn't find Hinata attractive, right? And he likes listening to Hinata talk because he's positive and kind to everyone, and makes Atsumu feel like he matters a lot. Not to mention his volleyball prowess—Hinata's a force of nature on the court, lithe and confident and strong. So it's only natural that Atsumu feels this way about him, isn't it? Doesn't everyone?
There isn't much point in asking himself these questions, because he already knows the answer.
"Shit," Atsumu says, raising his head. Bokuto and Sakusa, to their credit, have been respectfully silent the whole time, quietly eating and drinking. "I like him? I like Shouyou?"
"How are we supposed to know?" Bokuto says, tilting his head. "You're the one who likes him."
"You literally just told me!" Atsumu exclaims, exasperated. "Both of you!"
"We just said what it looked like," Sakusa says stubbornly. "Maybe you don't like him and you're just a pervert. Only you'd know, really."
"Omi-kun," Atsumu says, "we've been through this. Can you be nicer, please?"
"Whatever," Sakusa responds. At the same time, Bokuto says, "Well, he can still like him and be a pervert."
“Gross,” Sakusa says.
Atsumu glares at him. “If you're done eating, you can leave, you know.”
Sakusa stirs his drink, shrugs. “Don’t think I will.”
Atsumu rolls his eyes. He's starting to get the impression that despite Sakusa's cutting comments and apparent disinterest in most topics, he actually enjoys hearing about Atsumu's inner turmoil.
"Well?" Bokuto says. "So are you gonna do anything?"
"I don't know," Atsumu says, wringing his hands together. "Like what?"
"Ask him out or something?" Bokuto says. "I kinda think Hinata's a little too good for you though, Tsumu. He's my disciple, after all."
Atsumu winces. Trust Bokuto to deliver a cold, hard insult while looking like he's just brought you flowers. "Thank you, Bokuto," he says. "But Shouyou's a teammate, and—" His eyes widen as he remembers the reason he'd planned this dinner in the first place.
"What?" Sakusa asks.
"He's Samu's friend," Atsumu says, feeling his heart sink.
Osamu and Atsumu have a rule.
It'd started sometime in junior high, when Atsumu had met Osamu's then-best friend, Kana-chan, and found her pretty, and kissed her. They'd lasted for around one week before Atsumu stopped finding her that pretty, and accordingly, also stopped kissing her. In retaliation, Kana-chan had excommunicated Osamu from her group entirely—I can't stand looking at your face!—and Osamu spent the rest of the year best friend-less. And thus the don't kiss my friends rule was born, applicable to both parties. Somewhere along the line, don't kiss my friends became don't screw my friends, and the rest is history.
They've stuck to it relatively well over the years, and it's paid off. When they were younger, there’d been one or two slip-ups, which had really just reinforced the rule’s importance, but it’s generally been pretty good since the last year of high school.
But here, Atsumu doesn't really know how it works, because Hinata was technically his friend first, though he begrudgingly admits that Osamu does seem to be closer to Hinata these days. So does that give Osamu priority? Atsumu supposes he has to ask, which he is loath to do because he doesn't really want Osamu to know that he's into Hinata. Osamu does this annoying, embarrassing thing where he thinks back and analyzes all of Atsumu's interactions with his current person of interest and laughs at him, like so you actually left the party because you were jealous, and not because you were sick? It's unnecessary and downright humiliating, and it'll be even worse this time around, simply because Osamu's seen him interact with Hinata so much.
But, well, Atsumu's willing to take that loss, because—
"Atsumu-san, your serves were amazing today!"
Atsumu turns to bask in the light of an adoring Hinata, who grins up at him with the trademark sincerity that's won the hearts of so many. Atsumu included, of course. God, he thinks, I really am into him, aren't I? How the hell had he not realized until now?
"Thanks, Shouyou-kun," he says, trying to sound casual and cool like a good senpai should. He thinks he does alright.
"I feel like your serves get faster and stronger every time I see them," Hinata says, eyes glowing. "Just when I think you've peaked, it just goes boom!"
Atsumu resists the simultaneous urges to hold Hinata to his chest and hug him, fall to his knees to profess his feelings, and make passionate love to Hinata on the gym floor. Instead, he plasters a grin on his face and reaches out a hand to ruffle Hinata's hair.
"You're so—" he says. His voice cracks. Holding himself back like this really does take a toll. "You're really great too, Shouyou-kun."
Hinata laughs. Atsumu feels like he's staring into the sun. "You sure you're okay with touching my hair?" he asks. "I'm pretty sweaty."
He is, but Atsumu couldn't care less. Hinata's hair is still soft, and he looks good when he sweats, face flushed and glowing. It's very conducive to Atsumu's imagination. "I don't mind," he says, giving a final ruffle. “Wanna help each other stretch?”
“Sure!” Hinata says cheerily, and Atsumu silently thanks whatever god is out there, watching over him and showering him with blessings.
By chance, he catches Sakusa’s eye. Sakusa glances at him, and then Hinata, who is already sitting on the floor getting ready to stretch. Atsumu can almost see the gears turning in his head.
Pervert, Sakusa mouths silently, giving him a withering, disgusted glare.
In response, Atsumu flips him off when Hinata’s not looking. Then he ignores Sakusa, because he’s got better things to direct his attention to. Way better things.
Life goes on, strangely normal, even after Atsumu’s revelation at the sushi restaurant.
He plays volleyball. He eats—a lot. Does press conferences. Calls his parents (he's a good kid!). Flirts with Hinata. Spends an unreasonably long time trying to figure out whether Hinata was flirting back or just being nice. Plays more volleyball. Has dinner with his crazy teammates (friends?), who trash him thoroughly for being stupidly smitten.
So, yeah—Atsumu does a lot of things, really.
But he never does quite get around to telling Osamu about his Hinata-related feelings. To be fair, he doesn’t even see much of Osamu these days outside of the occasional volleyball game. Osamu’s busy, now more than ever with the skyrocketing popularity of his shop and its several new locations. Atsumu is, however, keenly aware that he could tell him over the phone or something, but it’s just… weird. It’d really feel like he’s making a huge deal out of this, and that’s the last thing he wants. It’s not like Atsumu’s sleeping with Hinata at this current moment anyways, unless you count sleeping next to each other on the bus.
The seat next to Hinata’s is—to nobody’s surprise—quite contested, just as Hinata's presence in itself is quite contested. Thankfully, Bokuto and Sakusa have been uncharacteristically generous about the whole thing since Atsumu started pouring out his heart to them over increasingly expensive sushi, and have generally allowed Atsumu to sit next to Hinata without much of a fuss. That being said, Sakusa also won't hesitate to steal the seat from right under Atsumu's nose if Atsumu's pissed him off to a certain extent. One time, Atsumu took one (1) sip from Sakusa's water bottle—which was an accident, by the way, Atsumu would never do that willingly—and subsequently Sakusa somehow managed to weasel his way in next to Hinata and spent the whole ride back smirking at Atsumu. What makes it worse is that Atsumu knows—he knows—that Sakusa prefers sitting by himself. Atsumu had contented himself with glaring back, thinking about how ugly Itachiyama's volleyball jerseys had been, and texting him a rapid-fire barrage of insults: you germophobic, floppy-wristed dickhead—
Hinata, for his part, seems equally pleased to sit beside anyone. Atsumu would be insulted—in what world would anyone enjoy sitting next to Sakusa as much as they'd enjoy sitting with him?—but Hinata's unconditional adoration for pretty much anyone is part of his charm, really.
That being said, Atsumu’s slowly coming to terms with liking Hinata. It’s…it’s an experience, with as many ups as there are downs. Both fortunately and unfortunately for Atsumu, Hinata is pretty much desensitized to his expressions of affection at this point, and doesn't blink twice at things like being hugged from behind and being used as a headrest. This—it's hard, because if it were anyone else, they probably would've picked up on Atsumu's feelings by now, but Hinata probably just thinks it's some wholesome, strictly-platonic (if slightly excessive) skinship. Though at the same time, it means that Hinata enjoys—and actually reciprocates—Atsumu touching him, which is wonderful, because it turns out that when you really like someone, physical contact gets you higher than a kite.
Today, Atsumu is fortunate enough to not have offended Sakusa at all while they played, not even a little, and just like that, he secures the seat next to Hinata's. Unfortunately for him, he hasn't slept too much in the past few days, and while he manages to get by during the game, he's about ready to pass out as soon as he gets on the bus. What a waste of a bus ride.
"You can have the window seat, Atsumu-san," Hinata says, perceptive as ever. "I think it might be nicer for sleeping."
"But you like looking out the window," Atsumu says. "Don't worry about me."
"I'll be fine!" Hinata protests. "I don’t need the window. But you—Atsumu-san, you need to sleep."
Atsumu opens his mouth to protest, but is interrupted by Meian, who's standing in the aisle behind him. "You're holding us up, Miya," he says.
"Sorry," Atsumu mutters to Meian, and hurriedly takes a seat, Hinata settling in beside him.
Hinata laughs, and Atsumu drinks in the sound of it, the sight of him smiling. And then he yawns—he can't help it.
"Goodnight, Atsumu-san," Hinata says.
"Goodnight, Shouyou-kun," Atsumu replies sleepily, closing his eyes as the bus starts. It all feels awfully domestic. Atsumu is lulled to sleep by the sound of the engine and the thought of Hinata's smile, bright and gentle and a little like sunlight.
He wakes up to the sound of Hinata laughing. Which is nice. What's not nice is that Hinata's smiling down at his phone the way teenage girls do when their crush messages them. The thing is, however, that Hinata kind of looks like that when he gets a text from anyone. All the same, it still irks Atsumu: he's always been a little possessive. You kind of get like that when you grow up having to fight tooth and nail to keep your own things to yourself.
"Oh," Hinata says, shooting him a glance. "Sorry, Atsumu-san! Did I wake you?"
Atsumu shakes his head. The sky outside is a deep blue now, darkening with a hint of dusk. "It's fine. Who are you texting?" he asks, trying to sound nonchalant.
"Kageyama!" Hinata says, smiling.
Atsumu feels immediately like someone's dumped a cold glass of water on his head. Not that he has anything personal against Kageyama, but ever since the match against the Adlers he's been more than a little hyper-aware of Hinata and Kageyama's transcendent bond (rivalry?) that's persisted through the years. And then there's the matter of service statistics, and the fact that Bokuto'd mentioned something about how he suspected that Kageyama and Hinata had been involved in high school—
No, Atsumu has nothing personal against Kageyama. But he has to physically resist scowling all the same.
"He's on a bus right now, too," Hinata continues. "Apparently Ushijima-senpai snores—can you imagine?"
"Huh," Atsumu mutters, sliding down in his seat. "Ushiwaka, a snorer. Who'd have thought?”
He tries to go back to sleep. But knowing that Hinata's texting Kageyama really doesn't help. So after a few unrestful moments, Atsumu takes out his own phone and opens his and Hinata's Line conversation. The last thing Hinata had sent him was a picture of a particularly fat bird the day before.
hi, Atsumu texts.
Hinata gives Atsumu a sideways glance and angles his phone away from him, smiling. In a moment, Atsumu receives a message: hi! i thought u were trying to sleep! And then, why are we texting when ur sitting beside me?
Atsumu feels himself start to smile. it's easier
no, it's not!
then talk to me
He sees Hinata's smile widen. no! it'd be weird to talk now
fine
why don't you talk to me?
Atsumu thinks for a moment before responding. i'm shy, hinata-san
Hinata laughs. Atsumu feels the warm swell of triumph in his chest—it's always nice to make Hinata laugh. you're never shy, atsumu-kun, Hinata texts.
Atsumu's thumbs hover over his phone screen, and he glances sideways. Hinata is watching him, expectant smile on his face, and the sudden eye contact makes Atsumu's heart flutter, makes him feel like his emotions are about to spill over. Swallowing, Atsumu puts away his phone and reaches out for Hinata, who obediently leans in to him. He pulls Hinata close, letting him rest his head against his chest.
Hinata laughs, a soft vibration. "What's this all of a sudden?"
Atsumu closes his eyes. "I'm shy sometimes," he says, cherishing the warmth of Hinata against him.
"Okay," Hinata says, sounding amused. And then, "You're so cool on the court, Atsumu-san, but you're really just like a big dog, huh?"
Atsumu blinks. "A dog?" He can almost hear Osamu laughing already: you just got dog-zoned! Pet-zoned! Maybe if you're lucky, he'll slap a collar on you—
"Well," Hinata says thoughtfully. "I've never had one, even though I like them. But you're friendly and loyal and you like to be touched, so I was just thinking it might feel similar."
"Nobody's really called me loyal before," Atsumu says.
"You are!" Hinata says, earnest. "I can tell."
Only to you, Atsumu thinks. He can't count the number of times Osamu's called him a backstabbing bastard. He can't count the number of times he's been a backstabbing bastard.
"Though you are a little devious sometimes," Hinata continues. "But that makes things interesting, you know?”
Atsumu smiles. "Thanks, Shouyou-kun," he says.
Hinata grins. "I should let you sleep," he says, and reaches up to pat Atsumu's head. "You look tired."
It's nothing really, just a small, casual gesture of care, but it makes Atsumu feel warm all over. "Thanks," he murmurs. "You should sleep too. We can sleep together." He stifles a yawn.
Hinata laughs. "You're moving a little too fast there, Atsumu-san." He cards his fingers through Atsumu's hair, which feels heavenly. Atsumu closes his eyes. "Go to sleep," Hinata says, softer. "We've still got a while to go."
Far too happy for someone who's as exhausted as he is, Atsumu feels himself drift off peacefully.
"He's so… good," Atsumu says. "At volleyball, too."
"Yeah, we know," Sakusa mutters, gingerly picking up a nigiri with his chopsticks.
"No, like he's so good. His form is actually beautiful, and if you think about it, it's amazing that he only started volleyball in high school but ended up all the way here—"
"Yeah," Sakusa says, "we know, Miya. We all play on the same goddamn team."
Atsumu shoots him a dirty look. "You're not the one setting to him. What would you know?"
Sakusa glares back at him. The two of them have themselves a bit of a stare-off until Sakusa relents, looking down at the plate. "I've got eyes," he mutters.
"Come on, Omi," Bokuto says, mouth full. "He's gotta get it out of his system, you know?"
"We should be getting paid for this," Sakusa mutters under his breath.
"I'm literally paying for your food, Omi-kun," Atsumu snaps.
Sakusa says nothing, but shoves another nigiri into his mouth mutinously.
"Hey, Tsumu," Bokuto says, tilting his head. "If you really like Hinata so much, why aren't you hanging out with him instead? Not that I'm complaining about these dinners, but wouldn't it be more efficient for you to actually tell him how amazing he is to his face?"
Atsumu splutters. He’s only ever hung out with Hinata when Osamu or somebody else is there too, and anything more private seems dangerously intimate. "Like— like a date? I couldn't—"
"What?" Bokuto raises an eyebrow. "No, not like a date, because you aren't dating him, because you’re scared of your brother, right?" Sakusa laughs. Atsumu wants to chuck a piece of sashimi at him. "Just—hanging out, you know. You're pretty good friends already. At any rate, he likes your jokes, so that's saying something. It shouldn't be weird."
Atsumu perks up. "First of all, I’m not scared of my brother, we have an agreement; also, my jokes aren't that bad, and—you really think so?"
Bokuto nods. "Here, I'll even ask!" To Atsumu's horror, he pulls out his phone and starts texting. "Hey, Hinata—would…it…be…weird…if Tsumu asked you to hang out—"
"Don't send that!" Atsumu hisses, making a grab for the phone.
"Send it!" Sakusa exclaims in a rare show of excitement, blocking Atsumu's hand.
"Sent!" Bokuto says proudly.
Atsumu groans, mortified. He rests his head on the table. "I hate you both," he says. “I hate myself.”
"Oh, look!" Bokuto says. "Hinata responded!"
"That was fast," Sakusa says.
Atsumu straightens up immediately. "What'd he say?"
Bokuto squints. "He said, 'haha what? Of course not!' Oh, he's typing something else…oh! 'I like Atsumu-san! Tell him I say hi!'" He grins. "See, Tsumu? It's fine! Hinata says hi!”
"Oh, well—" Atsumu leans back against the chair, feeling lighter, stifling a bit of a grin. "If he says he likes me—I guess I could ask him to hang out. Platonically."
"Listen, Tsumu," Bokuto says. "Not to brag, but I got myself a hot boyfriend, you know? You can trust me. I'm pretty good with this kind of stuff."
Sakusa scoffs. “ From what I've heard, your hot boyfriend basically fell into your lap. And you almost didn't notice. I don't know if that counts as you getting yourself anything."
"Yeah, Bokkun," Atsumu says, for once in agreement with Sakusa. "We can't all have ourselves an Akaashi-san."
"No, you can't!" Bokuto exclaims cheerily. He downs the rest of his beer and grins, rosy-cheeked. "Because he's mine! Ha!"
It’s easier than expected to ask Hinata to hang out (platonically). Presumably, it’s just as easy to actually hang out with Hinata (platonically). Or that's what Atsumu's trying to tell himself the day before, and realizing that he’s not at all emotionally prepared to spend time alone with someone he’s very, very attracted to. If Hinata finds him—god forbid—boring, that’s it. He might as well just shave his head, leave the city, and take the cloth in a well-funded monastery.
So Atsumu calls Gin. He lives in the area, and they still have lunch together every once in a while to gossip about their old teammates. After a few rings, Gin picks up.
“What—”
“Can I borrow your dog?” Atsumu asks.
“Can you—can you what now?”
Atsumu stares up at the ceiling. “I’m hanging out with Hinata Shouyou tomorrow. I need a dog.”
Gin sounds flabbergasted. “Hinata—Osamu’s friend? The hell do you need a dog for?”
"Hinata, my teammate," Atsumu says, bristling. "Listen. You can ask questions, or you can have me take care of your dog for free while you're at work.”
"I—”
“Come on, man,” Atsumu says. “Help a friend out, would you? What have you got to lose?”
He can almost hear the gears turning in Gin’s head. “So what you’re saying,” Gin says slowly, “is that you’ll dogsit for free because you’re hanging out with your teammate tomorrow.”
“Yeah,” Atsumu says.
“Ah, hell,” Gin says. “Kurumi’s been lonely these days because I work so much. Might as well.”
“She loves me," Atsumu reminds him. "I’m good with dogs. You know it’ll be fine.”
“Ugh, I already agreed,” Gin says. “Whatever. But you come pick her up tomorrow.”
“Thank you so much,” Atsumu says, trying to inject as much gratitude in his voice as possible. “I owe you one. You’re a great friend.”
“Gross,” says Gin. “Good luck with your date or whatever.”
“Not a date,” Atsumu says. “He’s Samu’s friend, remember?”
“Right,” Gin says. “That stupid rule of yours. It’s still going? Aren’t you guys old enough to like—I don’t know— abolish that by now?”
“The rule’s important!” Atsumu exclaims indignantly, suddenly defensive before realizing that the rule is what’s driving him a little nuts in the first place.
“Okay, okay, chill out,” Gin says. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you,” Atsumu says.
Gin hangs up. Atsumu is left lying there on his bed, thinking about the Rule and about Hinata. Eventually, he falls asleep. Volleyball is tiring, and so is having a big fat crush.
Kurumi is a good-looking dog, the kind that could make it big on social media if Gin put some effort into it. She’s also spectacularly friendly, and greets Hinata—a complete stranger—with enthusiastic joy, in the way that only dogs do.
“Oh my god!” Hinata says, obviously delighted. He drops his bag and kneels to reciprocate Kurumi’s affections, petting her all over while laughing. Atsumu feels his heart clench with the sheer cuteness of it all. “Oh my god, you’re so pretty!” He turns to Atsumu. “You said she’s your friend’s?”
“Yeah, I offered to take care of her for the day,” Atsumu says. It’s not a lie, technically, so his conscience stays as clear as a recently cleaned window.
“That’s very nice of you,” Hinata says, sounding impressed. Kurumi licks his nose, and he wrinkles it.
“Yeah,” Atsumu says, without shame. “I guess it is.”
“So I guess we’ll be taking care of her for most of the day, huh?” Hinata says. “I’ve always wanted to walk a dog!” Kurumi's ears perk up.
"Great," Atsumu says, grinning. If Hinata had said he’d always wanted to fling himself off a cliff into the void, Atsumu probably would've agreed to that too. He grabs Kurumi's leash and pats on her on the head. "Let's go take a walk, then."
They walk to a nearby park, making easy conversation. The weather today is thankfully clear and warm, and there aren't many people about because it's a weekday. Hinata holds the leash, excited and cheery, and Kurumi trots next to him obediently.
"I've never been to your neighbourhood before, Atsumu-san," Hinata says. "It's nice!"
"You should come more often," Atsumu says, unable to stop himself.
Hinata grins. "Then you should invite me more often, Atsumu-san," he says.
Whoa. Whoa. Atsumu has to make a conscious effort to keep walking, because he's tempted to just stand there and process that tiny, short sentence. For the umpteenth time, he's left wondering whether Hinata is flirting, and whether Hinata has ever flirted knowingly in his entire life.
"Sure," he manages.
"Bokuto-san's place is pretty nice too," Hinata continues thoughtfully.
"Ah," Atsumu says. He's only ever been outside Bokuto's apartment to pick him up for sushi. "You've gone?"
"Yeah!" Hinata says. "I helped him and Akaashi-san move in."
"They're a nice couple," Atsumu says. "I've never met two people that balance each other out so well."
"You're right!" Hinata says, amused. "They were pretty much the same in high school too. It's nice." He laughs. "Sometimes, they feel like my parents or something—they're not even that much older, though."
Trust Hinata to be taken under almost everyone's wing. "Well, Bokuto does call you his disciple a lot," Atsumu says.
"And I'm grateful!" Hinata says. "But the other day Akaashi-san—I swear he got a little mad at me for forgetting to wear a hat in the sun? And I was like, 'It's fine, Akaashi-san, I won't die,' but he kept looking so—so concerned."
Atsumu chuckles. He's only really met Akaashi in passing, but he can imagine the situation easily. "People like taking care of you," he says.
"I suppose it's nice," Hinata says thoughtfully. "Does anyone take care of you, Atsumu-san? What about Osamu-san?"
"Osamu will take care of me if I'm dying, I guess," Atsumu says, scoffing. "But it's mutual, so that's alright. I suppose Kita-senpai counts, though. My old high school captain," he adds, as Hinata tilts his head inquisitively.
"Ah," Hinata says. "The rice farmer that supplies for Osamu-san? That's nice."
"Yeah," Atsumu says. He stops. "You can take Kurumi off-leash here. It's kind of a dog park, so we can play fetch and all."
"Ooh," Hinata says, excited. "You hear that, Kurumi?" Kurumi's wagging tail has accelerated into a blur. "You get to play fetch!"
Seeing the two of them together, basking in each other's adoration, Atsumu decides to wire Gin some money when he gets back home.
They order food for lunch after tiptoeing around plans for later in the day ("Do you have to go anytime soon?" Atsumu manages to ask, with Hinata awkwardly responding, "Do you want me to go?"). Kurumi, thoroughly tuckered out, passes out on the bed that Atsumu had brought over from Gin's house. Hinata looks pretty drowsy himself, content and full, resting his head on the table with his phone in hand.
It takes a while for Atsumu to realize something's up. "Are you taking pictures of me?" Atsumu asks.
"No," Hinata says, smiling and very obviously lying.
"Hey!" Atsumu says, reaching for Hinata's phone, but Hinata shifts away, giggling. "Those are not consensual images, I look like garbage right now—“
“Yeah, you do—"
Atsumu gasps, feigning hurt. "You're not allowed to agree!"
"I'm just joking!" Hinata says, laughing. "You look wonderful, Atsumu-san, really handsome—"
"You're overcompensating, Shouyou-kun," Atsumu says. He makes another grab for the phone, but it's futile.
"Relax, Atsumu-san," Shouyou says, still grinning. "I'm just sending some to Osamu-san. And Bokuto-san. And—"
"You caught me while I was yawning, didn't you?" Atsumu accuses him.
"You looked very nice," Hinata says innocently. “Like a lion.”
"Ah, whatever," Atsumu says, pretending to be annoyed when he's actually over the moon about being able to bicker so easily with Hinata. "You look tired. Wanna take a nap?"
So they do, but not together—Atsumu lets Hinata have the bed while he settles for the couch, despite Hinata's protests. The afternoon sun streams in through the windows, and the apartment is quiet. Atsumu is smiling as he falls asleep.
Hinata takes his leave after they wake up a few hours later.
"Thanks for coming," Atsumu says as Hinata pets Kurumi goodbye. He's suddenly feeling embarrassed, awkward, just thinking about all the ways he might've said too much or been annoying.
"Thanks for inviting me," Hinata says, standing up. "I had fun." He grins, brilliant and warm. "Let's do this again sometime, Atsumu-san!"
"Thank you," Atsumu says to Gin when he returns Kurumi, "thank you, thank you." He kisses Kurumi on the nose. “Thank you.”
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Gin demands. "Why'd you send me money?"
Atsumu’s days off start becoming the highlight of his life. Hinata never turns down his invitations, and eventually he starts asking Atsumu to hang out too, which makes Atsumu’s heart flutter in his chest. They end up going to different places—the movies, a nice restaurant, the mall—doing their utmost to avoid the paparazzi. It's fun. It's really fun.
Atsumu has to repeatedly remind himself that no, these aren’t dates, and that he shouldn’t even be thinking about dating Hinata. What he probably should do is talk properly to Osamu, though try as he might, he can never quite bring himself to do so. But it's okay. It's not like Hinata likes him back or anything, anyways. Nothing's going to happen. Atsumu will just keep being Hinata's friend and enjoying his company, treasuring his smiles like they're precious things.
Things are manageable—hell, even enjoyable—before the Hinata lock incident. This happens one day when Atsumu gets a new lock and forgets the combination that very evening after practice. He’s standing in front of his locker, racking his apparently empty brain, while his teammates deem it fit to weigh in on the situation.
“That’s why I never use a lock!” Bokuto proclaims.
“That’s why you lost three pairs of shoes in high school, Koutarou,” Akaashi calls from outside.
“I’m sure it was nine—nine something,” Atsumu mutters, staring down at the lock.
“I’m going home,” says Sakusa, and promptly leaves.
“I can try to help!” Hinata says. "I'd always forget my combo in high school, so I learned how to crack one. It might take a while, though."
Trust Hinata to be the only useful person on the entire team. “You’re welcome to try,” Atsumu says, stepping aside.
It takes a while—Hinata actually pulls out a phone to record some numbers as he goes along, and eventually the rest of the team filter out of the changeroom. Hinata spins the dial repeatedly with deft fingers, biting his lip in focus.
Standing there, watching Hinata try to crack a combination lock in loose sweats, Atsumu learns something new about himself.
“Ah,” Hinata eventually says, voice uncharacteristically low. “Gotcha.” He opens the lock with one smooth, efficient motion, and turns to grin at Atsumu, mischievous and triumphant. “Here you go, Atsumu-san!”
Atsumu feels all the blood in his head rush towards his crotch faster than a river during a flood warning. God, he thinks, I wanna wake up to you in the morning and take you like a vitamin.
“Thank you, Shouyou-kun,” he manages. “I owe you one.”
Hinata grins. “Just buy me lunch or something on our next day off,” he says cheerily. "You were right, by the way. The combination does start with a nine—it's nine, twenty-three, twelve."
Oh, god. Forget getting into lockers. Hinata has gotten into Atsumu's desperate, lovestruck heart and is staying there rent-free. Date me! Atsumu wants to yell, but just kind of stands there instead, like he hasn't gone through an entire romantic awakening in two minutes.
Being in love is hard. Who knew?
This—the Hinata lock incident—is the point of no return. Yeah, it's weird. Atsumu doesn't know how his brain (or heart, whatever) works either. Regardless, this is when Atsumu truly realizes that he really, truly wants to date Hinata. Wants to date him so badly it hurts when he wakes up in the morning and goes to bed at night. And this is—well, this is a problem because first of all, he doesn't know if Hinata even likes him, and at this point he's too afraid to ask. Second of all, Osamu.
Atsumu's been texting Osamu a little less than he usually does, thanks to his guilt. To Osamu's credit, he seems to pick up on the fact that something's wrong, and is starting to initiate conversations more. For all their bickering, their teenage rivalry, they're still twins.
hey, Osamu texts, a few days after the Hinata lock incident. how u doing
Atsumu hesitates before he texts back. hey can we maybe forget about the rule, we're old now right
no wtf, Osamu responds. And then, which one of my friends are u trying to screw u horny bastard
Atsumu winces. nobody, don't be crude osamu-kun
ok have a nice day
And then a week later:
hey tsumu what's up
I'm in love, Atsumu texts. It's basically a cry for help at this point.
ok just wanted to let u know I'll be in town next week
Atsumu sighs. He doesn't know what he expected. To be fair, he doesn't really give too much of a reason for Osamu to ever take his messages seriously. Well, being a sarcastic bastard is certainly biting him in the ass now, isn't it?
The night before Osamu comes to visit, Atsumu and Hinata go out to drink. Now, this is probably not the best idea because they have physical training the next day, but they're both generally responsible people, and it's never really ended badly before. Strangely, however, Hinata seems intent on getting drunk, which is rather uncharacteristic of him. He looks weirdly determined as he downs one after the other, and it gets to the point where Atsumu is finishing drinks for him.
"Okay," Atsumu says, after an hour of this. He's giggling a little, because he is admittedly rather drunk. "We should stop. We should stop."
Hinata laughs. "We should, shouldn't we?" So they pay the bill, and make their way over to Hinata's apartment by foot, sobering up a little but still rather prone to fits of laughter.
"Shh," Hinata says, between laughs. They're at the door of his apartment. "Be quiet, I have neighbours—"
"Okay, okay," Atsumu says.
They go inside the apartment, and Atsumu promptly collapses onto the couch.
"I'm going to the bathroom," Hinata says. "There's water on the table. You can drink that."
So Atsumu sits there, sipping from a bottle of water while he waits for Hinata to come back. He's still pretty buzzed, and he finds himself hyperfocusing on the bottle's packaging. It's very pretty.
Hinata comes back in a bit and plops down ungracefully next to Atsumu, and Atsumu cannot help but look at him, the alcohol erasing what little shame he has left in his system. He catches Hinata's eye and smiles, feeling warm inside when Hinata smiles back.
"I think—" Hinata's eyelashes flutter against the pale skin of his cheek. He laughs gently, sounding a little giddy. "I think I'm a little drunk."
It’s a harmless admission, really nothing at all out of the ordinary, but the way Hinata’s voice lowers like he’s telling a secret, the way he glances up through his lashes, almost shyly, seems so wonderfully intimate that Atsumu feels his heart skip a beat. His mouth is dry, his mind hazy. There is a thrill running under his skin. A dangerous yearning for warmth and touch and everything that comes after.
"I probably am too," Atsumu admits, looking away and feeling his cheeks flush even more.
"We're both gonna regret this in the morning, aren't we?" Hinata says.
"I mean," Atsumu says, "it would've been fine if someone wasn't doing their best to drown themselves in alcohol." He looks up, meeting Hinata's gaze. "Is something wrong?"
Hinata shakes his head. "No, I…" He trails off into silence.
He looks beautiful like this, cheeks rosy and eyes downcast. His hair looks as soft as ever, curls so tempting to touch that Atsumu has to clench his hands into fists.
"You're staring again, Atsumu-san," Hinata says, almost a little shyly. He tilts his head. "You stare at me a lot, don't you? I—I feel it sometimes."
"I—" Atsumu closes his mouth, suddenly mortified. He turns away. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to—"
"No, " Hinata says. "I meant—" He shifts, a little unsteadily, and moves closer to Atsumu.
Atsumu cannot help but follow his movement like a wary animal, but does not move. There is an electricity in the air that makes him itch with apprehension, expectancy. So he stays still, rigid like a statue even as Hinata settles down heavily on his lap, straddling him and resting his arms on Atsumu's shoulders, and Atsumu vaguely wonders if this is simply his dreams starting to get hyper-realistic and turning into straight up wank material.
"I don't mind you staring," Hinata finishes quietly, eyes bright and focused despite his drunkenness, and oh, so this is how Hinata flirts—unabashed, bold, with a pretty tint of red on his cheeks, enough to drive Atsumu crazy.
"I—" Atsumu's brain is short-circuiting, and the alcohol definitely does not help. "Shouyou-kun, I—"
Hinata laughs.
"Don't laugh," Atsumu says, groaning.
"But I think you're funny," Hinata says, smiling.
Atsumu makes a quiet, strangled sound, trying very hard not to reach out, to touch.
"Atsumu-san," Hinata says, "you're hard."
He is—it's like he's a high schooler again, sensitive and embarrassed. "I know," Atsumu mumbles, face aflame. He buries his face in Hinata's shoulder. "Don't move. Please."
"Atsumu-san," Hinata murmurs, after a moment, "I don't mind. Do you?"
Atsumu looks up at him. His mind is slow, weighed down, and he tries to parse Hinata’s words, the heat behind them. "You—"
"I don't mind," Hinata says again, in that same low, sweet voice, and they're so close to each other that Atsumu can feel the warmth of his breath.
Something in Atsumu snaps. All those months of holding back, of fantasy and staring and near-sleepless nights, of his dully aching heart come to a head, and Atsumu surges upwards to kiss Hinata, open-mouthed and more than a little filthy. Hinata makes a pleased, surprised little noise, and parts his lips to let Atsumu in, reciprocating with fervour. Atsumu is lost in the feeling, the ecstasy coupled with an intoxicating hunger—his hands roam under Hinata's shirt, over the flat plane of his stomach that he's always dreamt of touching, tracing the smooth contour of his hipbone, climbing up to his chest.
“I like you so much,” he’s saying, in between kisses. “You’re so hot, I—”
Hinata laughs, bright and beautiful. “I’m hot?” he asks. “What, that’s it? Atsumu-san, some might say you only like me for my body—”
“What?” Atsumu raises his head to look at Hinata. “No, you’re so much more, but you are hot.”
“Well,” Hinata says, amused. “I guess that’s fine then.” He nips Atsumu’s throat, and Atsumu shivers. “And for what it’s worth,” Hinata continues, whispering into Atsumu's ear, “I think you’re hot too. I always did.”
Atsumu feels himself flush, thinking of the meaning of that sentence, the implications. His brain is short-circuiting from alcohol and arousal and that other impossibly huge feeling growing in his chest, and his only possible response is to kiss Hinata hard on the mouth, feeling Hinata respond enthusiastically.
Atsumu’s in the process of leaving a hickey near Hinata's collarbone when he remembers. It’s like getting a kick to the face. He freezes. Hinata seems to sense his hesitation, going still and opening his eyes.
“I—I think I should go home,” Atsumu says.
“Oh,” says Hinata. He sounds disappointed, a little taken aback. But he doesn't ask any questions. “Okay.” He gets up off of Atsumu’s lap, lips still kiss-swollen.
“I’m sorry,” Atsumu says, heart cracking down the middle, “ I’m really sorry, Shouyou-kun—”
Hinata smiles, a little strained but warm nevertheless. “There’s nothing to apologize for,” he says. “We drank a little too much, that’s all.”
Atsumu knows that Hinata’s just trying to smoothe things over, but it really stings, because this was so much more than drinking a little too much, this was worlds aligning and fates colliding, the final culmination of little moments where they fell just a bit in love with each other. And that makes what he’s doing even worse—it's a coward's retreat.
“Please—please be my friend still,” Atsumu says when he's at the doorway, lowering his gaze. “I wouldn’t be able to handle it if—”
Hinata laughs lightly. “Of course, Atsumu-san,” he says. “I like you far too much to cut you off entirely. This isn’t—wasn’t a big deal.” He raises his hand, and Atsumu almost bows his head instinctually for the expected hair ruffle, but Hinata hesitates and pulls back at the last second. "Have a good night," Hinata says instead. "Tell Osamu-san I say hi."
"Okay," Atsumu says, feeling very small. "Goodnight, Shouyou-kun."
The night air is cool, and it sobers him up just a little more, enough for him to start feeling truly awful. The walk back to his apartment is probably the most depressing thing he's ever experienced. People passing by give him concerned looks.
Eventually, however, he makes it home. Before he can enter the door code, the door swings open. Osamu stands there, giving him an unimpressed once-over.
Atsumu squints. Osamu wasn't supposed to come until the day after. "Why are you here?"
“Schedule changed,” Osamu says, frowning. “I texted you earlier today."
"Oh," Atsumu says. "Move over. Let me in."
"You're drunk," Osamu says, frowning. All the same, he moves over. "Why are you drunk? Don't you have training tomorrow?”
“I’m not,” Atsumu says, too quickly. “Drunk.”
“You gonna throw up?” Osamu asks, suspicious. “You better not throw up in my apartment.”
"This is my apartment," Atsumu says, slurring his words a little. "Get out if you're going to be an asshole." He's spiteful and angry and resentful at everything, but Osamu especially, because of that stupid, stupid rule they've followed blindly for years. The rule that made Hinata look like he was about to cry.
"Alright, relax," Osamu says. "I was just joking. Come on, you look like you're going to pass out." He leads Atsumu into his bedroom, and makes him lie down. "I'll get you a glass of water."
Huh. So maybe Osamu isn't as heartless as Atsumu thought he was. Or maybe he's just grown as a person. Whatever it is, it's welcome.
The darkness of the room adds on to Atsumu's exhaustion, and he falls asleep before Osamu returns.
"What about Shouyou?"
"Huh?" Atsumu says, waking and sitting up too fast in his shock. The room spins around him, and he sees Osamu standing over him, looking down.
"You were saying his name in your sleep," Osamu says, sitting down next to him. "Shouyou-kun, Shouyou-kun—"
"Shut up," Atsumu mutters, rubbing his eyes.
"You into him or something?" Osamu jokes, chuckling. "God knows you're clingy enough with him."
Atsumu still feels vaguely nauseated. "I'm not clingy," he mumbles, and downs the glass of water on his nightstand.
"Yes, you are," Osamu says, obviously enjoying it. "Were you dreaming about him, you clingy creep?”
“Yeah,” Atsumu mumbles. He's drunk. God, he's still drunk, which is why he keeps talking like an idiot. “Against the wall, I—” He stops himself at the last second, but the damage is done.
Osamu stares for a second, blank shock on his face as he registers what he’s just heard. And then he just looks at Atsumu like he’s the most pathetic, disgusting thing in existence, and the sad thing is that Atsumu kind of gets why.
“Seriously?” Osamu says, after a scathing moment of silence.
Atsumu stays mute. There’s really no coming back after this.
“God,” Osamu says, after a few moments. “Right. I was just joking, but—of course you want to screw Shouyou.” He throws up his hands. “One of the best, purest friends I’ve made, and you want to do him against the wall—”
“What, you don’t?” Atsumu says, a little accusingly.
“No!” Osamu exclaims. “God! You—did you think—” He grabs a nearby pillow and hits Atsumu on the head with it. “Not everyone is like you, you absolute pervert—”
Atsumu doesn't know why Osamu's so angry. They've liked the same girl in high school before, and had told each other about it and fought a little, then made up and had a decent time. Not that she'd dated either of them, though. Said something about their personalities being a little too scary. Atsumu can't blame her; they were both little volleyball-obsessed shitheads back in high school. He thinks—hopes—they've improved a little.
But—this must mean that Osamu actually likes Hinata a lot as a friend. Which is kind of sweet, to be honest, but it's pretty inconvenient too. Atsumu doesn't really need any additional overprotective friend action when it comes to Hinata—heaven knows he has enough to deal with already.
"Sorry," he says maliciously, closing his eyes because the lights feel too bright. "Sorry for having feelings I can't control, jeez. Just stop. Please. You're making me wanna throw up."
"Ugh," Osamu says, but puts down the pillow. "I'll go get you more water."
He comes back in a few moments, placing the glass in Atsumu's hand.
"Thanks," Atsumu mumbles. He'd forgotten how thirsty he was—he drains almost the entire thing in one go.
Osamu waits until he's done drinking, then says, "You're not allowed to screw Shouyou."
"What, we're going to keep talking about this?" Atsumu says, blinking slowly to clear his head. "Can we wait? I feel like death."
"You can't screw him," Osamu insists, but his voice is gentler this time. "He's my friend, okay? A good friend. No screwing my friends, right? We agreed—"
Atsumu would back down on any other occasion. But this is special—Hinata is special. "He was my friend first," he says stubbornly.
"Yeah, that's why I'm not sleeping with him!" Osamu says, exasperated, a bit of heat returning to his voice.
"You want to?" Atsumu says, narrowing his eyes. Sizing up the competition, who looks an awful lot like him. "I thought you just said—"
"No, I don't!" Osamu exclaims, throwing up his hands. "But even if I did, I wouldn't, because I follow our rules!"
"Okay," Atsumu says. "Fine. I get it." And then, "But…unless—just this once—"
"No," Osamu says. "You'll screw him, and it'll be awkward, and when he sees me there's always gonna be this weird tension because I look like you, and then we'll slowly start to drift apart because he has unresolved feelings for you and he's reminded of it every time we're together, then he decides to murder me because—"
"That sounds really specific," Atsumu says, raising an eyebrow.
"I've been watching a few Korean dramas," Osamu admits. A pause. "But you know we didn't make that rule for no reason." He sighs. "I'm not trying to be a stick in the mud, you know? I just—I like Shouyou."
“I know,” Atsumu says. "I like him too."
They're quiet for a moment.
"You know, I don’t just wanna screw him physically," Atsumu says, breaking the silence.
Osamu frowns. “You wanna screw him mentally, too?”
“What?” Atsumu says, perplexed. ”What does that even mean?”
"I don't know," Osamu says. "You tell me."
For some reason, Atsumu is hit with a sudden wave of embarrassment. "I—I just," he says, and looks down at his hands. "You know."
"I don't," Osamu says, sounding frustrated.
"No," Atsumu says, wringing his fingers together. "I mean—you know."
"I—" Osamu looks like he's about to start yelling again. And then he must get it, because his mouth goes slack and his eyes widen. “My god,” he says, “you actually really like him, don't you? Are you in love with him?”
"Well," Atsumu says, still not making eye contact. "I don't not like him."
Osamu gives him a look.
“Fine,” Atsumu says, folding. “Fine. Sorry.” He covers his face again. “I like him, okay? I really, really like him.” He tries not to sound sad, but he can’t help it.
Beside him, Osamu is quiet.
"He makes me happy," Atsumu continues. "I—" God, is he about to cry? He's never drinking again after this. "I just—I didn't mean to like him or anything, I swear, he's just so—good. And I think he likes me back—God knows why, but he does. Or at least he did." He sniffs, thinking of the way Hinata's face had fallen when Atsumu turned him down.
He hears Osamu sigh, feels the warm weight of an arm around his shoulder. "Horny bastard," Osamu says, but there's no heat in his voice. He places a tissue box on Atsumu's lap. "Wipe your face."
Atsumu does, eyes stinging. After a while, he feels a little bit back to normal. Still embarrassed, though.
"You feeling better?" Osamu says.
Atsumu nods silently.
Osamu exhales. "Sorry," he says. "I didn't know you were so serious about him."
"It's okay," Atsumu says.
"I like Shouyou," Osamu says. He sounds like he's picking his words carefully. "He means a lot to me as a friend. But I want you to be happy too, you know?"
Atsumu's eyes widen. "You do?"
"Don't be a prick," Osamu says, cuffing him on the head. Being drunk does not make it hurt less. "I'm trying to be heartfelt here."
"Thanks," Atsumu says honestly.
Osamu hums. "Is that why you were so upset today?" he asks. "Because of Shouyou?"
"Well, yeah," Atsumu says, feeling the dull ache in his chest as he remembers what just happened a few hours ago. "We—we may have gotten drunk and uh—" He sneaks a glance at Osamu, who, to his credit, is keeping a pretty good poker face. "We might've made out a bit, but I remembered that he was your friend, and I just… left."
Osamu stares at him for a long moment.
Atsumu braces himself. "Can you say something, please? You're scaring me."
Osamu takes a deep breath, like he's trying to calm himself. Atsumu starts to sweat. "So you're telling me that you got drunk, made out with Hinata, and then you just left him high and dry in the middle of the night?"
"Well, when you put it like that—"
"Did you explain?" Osamu demands.
"I don't know, I just kinda panicked and ran—"
Osamu leans in, suddenly looking very menacing. "Did. You. Explain."
Atsumu winces, because he knows he's definitely in the wrong here. "I… don't think so?"
"Motherfuck," Osamu says. "So you just left him like that, with no explanation? I—my god, are you a romcom character? You use your mouth to talk so much smack, but when it comes to something important like this, suddenly you don't know how to use it?"
Yikes. Atsumu does deserve that. "I know, I know, I'm stupid!"
Osamu sighs. "This is almost just as bad as if you actually did sleep with him." He takes another deep breath, steadies himself a little. When he speaks again, his voice is calmer. "I—I appreciate your loyalty to our rule, but I think you did pretty badly in this respect."
"No, I did," Atsumu says.
"It's okay," Osamu says, almost to himself. "I'll help you work this out. He likes you—that's pretty obvious."
"That's debatable," Atsumu says, deflating.
Osamu cuffs him on the head again. "Will you stop wallowing in self-pity for one minute and just listen to me?" he demands. "God, you sound pathetic."
"Well, thanks," Atsumu retorts, glaring at him.
"Listen," Osamu says. "I'm trying to help you get laid, for god's sake."
"I don't just—"
"Yeah, it's not just physical, I know, I know," Osamu says, rolling his eyes. "Still. I'm saying that I don't think your chances are zero, you know?"
Atsumu perks up. "What makes you say that?"
Osamu huffs. "Now you listen, huh?" He shifts, looking up at the ceiling. "Well, you know, half the time we hang out together, he mostly talks about you. Like—oh, Atsumu-san is so cool, how's he like as a brother—"
"Did you say nice things about me?" Atsumu asks.
"Hell no," Osamu says, looking disgusted. "I tell him the truth. That you're a shady, egotistic piece of—"
Atsumu glares at him. Never mind that he would do the exact same thing.
"But here's the thing," Osamu continues. "He just laughs and keeps asking about you. It's like he's not even hearing what I'm saying."
Atsumu feels something like hope beginning to grow in his chest. "Really?"
"Yeah," Osamu says. "So don’t worry. I'll help you guys out, okay?"
"Thanks," Atsumu says, genuine.
Osamu shakes his head. "I'm sorry," he says. "I should've been a better listener. We should've talked this out beforehand—maybe we are too old for stupid rules."
Atsumu smiles. "It's okay," he says. "Let's just say we both messed up."
"Heaven knows we do a lot of that," Osamu says. "Do you ever feel bad for our parents?"
"Oh, all the time," Atsumu says, and they laugh.
Osamu stands up. "Go to bed," he says. "We'll work things out in the morning."
"Okay," Atsumu says, and lies back down obediently. Osamu smiles at him, then turns off the light.
Left in the dark, Atsumu hopes that tomorrow will be a better day.
He wakes up to Osamu shaking him. "Get up. It's late."
"Ugh," Atsumu says, pushing Osamu away. Thankfully, he isn't too hungover. "Be quiet."
“What about this?" Osamu says, and proceeds to do the worst Hinata impression ever seen. "Atsumu-san, Atsumu-san, you’re an amazing setter! You’re better than Kageyama will ever be!” He grins deviously. “That gets you going, doesn’t it?”
Atsumu resists the urge to clock him. He never should have told Osamu anything. "Get out of my room, asshat."
"I'll leave when you get up. You slept through your alarm, idiot."
"Fine, fine," Atsumu says, forcing himself out of bed and into the bathroom. Taking a shower cuts most of his grogginess, and he heads into the kitchen actually feeling alright. And then he stops in his tracks, because both Osamu and Hinata are in the kitchen.
Atsumu blinks, unsure of whether he's seeing things. Why would Hinata be at his apartment? But he is, and he turns to look at Atsumu, surprised. Before Atsumu can say anything, Osamu interrupts him.
"You," Osamu says, looking at Atsumu. "Get out of here."
"Huh?"
"Out!" Osamu says, pointing at the bedroom. "Shouyou and I have things to talk about. Alone."
Atsumu shares a look with Hinata, who looks just as bemused as he does.
"I'll let you know when you can come inside," Osamu says.
Atsumu obediently goes back into his bedroom, closing his door behind him. He resists the urge to listen in, but he has a vague idea of what Osamu is trying to do: I'll help you guys out, okay? All the same, he can't help the anxiety welling up inside him.
After a few moments, his phone goes off. K come out now, Osamu texts. u gotta drive shouyou to practice, also ur welcome
It's a little awkward, but not intensely uncomfortable. Hinata makes easy conversation with Osamu while waiting for Atsumu to grab a quick breakfast, and then they get ready to leave at the doorway.
“Hey, Shouyou-kun,” Osamu calls, and the hair on Atsumu’s neck stands up at the shit-eating tone of his voice. “I didn't get to tell you this before, but I hope you like walls, because—”
Atsumu frantically covers Hinata’s ears with his hands, feeling simultaneously furious and mortified. He can only pray that Hinata didn’t hear most of it.
“We’re leaving!” he shouts, way too loud, and takes Hinata gently by the wrist. Hinata looks a little taken aback, but doesn't resist. “Sorry, he’s just spouting bullshit, let’s go—"
He glares at Osamu as he shuts the door. Osamu's laughing, the bastard.
The drive to the sports complex isn't a long one. For a while, neither of them says anything, but Hinata ends up breaking the silence.
"You're so stupid, Atsumu-san," he says, though there's no heat in his voice.
"What?" Atsumu blurts out. Hinata's never talked to him like this before. "I mean, you're right, but—what?"
Hinata smiles, for the first time in a while. It's like the break of dawn after a cold night. "Let's have a talk after training, Atsumu-san," he says. "Would that be okay? I want to think a little first."
Atsumu sneaks a glance at him. Hinata doesn't look too upset—rather, he seems calm and focused. "Sure," Atsumu says, swallowing. "Of course."
Training is… okay. By unspoken agreement, they end up avoiding each other for the time being. It's a good opportunity for Atsumu to gather his thoughts, to come up with an explanation. However, their distance doesn't go unnoticed by the rest of the team.
"Did you and Hinata fight?" Bokuto asks, in between sets. "I thought you were doing pretty well—it half felt like you were dating, you know?"
"No, no fighting," Atsumu says. He's hyperaware of Hinata a few metres away with Sakusa. "Can you keep your voice down?"
"That's good," Bokuto says, just a smidge quieter. "Even though I missed eating sushi, it was nice that you were both so happy."
His sincerity is sweet, and Atsumu feels a sudden surge of gratitude. "Thanks," he says.
"Well, whatever it is," Bokuto continues, "I hope you work it out."
Atsumu swallows. "I'll do my best," he says.
"I know," Bokuto says, and pats him on the back.
When training ends, Atsumu is the last person to finish stretching, and somehow, there's almost nobody left in the changeroom by the time he enters. He showers and changes, and waits for Hinata to finish near his locker. After a while, Hinata comes next to him, quiet.
"I'm sorry," Atsumu says, bowing his head. "I'm sorry, I—"
"Osamu-san told me," Hinata says quietly. "Why didn't you just—just talk to me?"
"Sorry," Atsumu says again. "I panicked yesterday, I—"
"Even before that," Hinata says. "I always wondered if you actually liked me or not. You would do all these things, say all these things, but you would never actually make a move. You basically took me on dates. I didn't know what to think; I didn't know if I was just making it all up in my head."
"Oh," Atsumu says, his heart dropping. He had never really considered that Hinata had ever returned his feelings, had felt just as confused as he did. And last night on top of that—Atsumu doesn't know how to apologize anymore.
"That's why I drank so much yesterday," Hinata says. "I was scared, but I wanted to know. I try to take care of my body because of that time in high school, you know, but I really was scared. And then—" And then Atsumu had kissed him and ran away with no explanation.
"Oh my god," Atsumu says. "I'm so sorry, Shouyou-kun. I'm really so sorry. I didn't think—" He'd agreed to talk to Hinata with the intent of winning his forgiveness and confessing his feelings, but he knows now that it's way too much to ask. "You don't have to talk to me again if you don't want to."
"No," Hinata says, placing his hand on Atsumu's. "I said it last night, and I meant it: I like you too much to cut you off, Atsumu-san."
Atsumu sneaks a glance at him. Hinata is smiling—he's smiling? "What do I need to do?" Atsumu asks, voice hoarse. "I'll do anything if it'll make you happy."
Hinata looks up at him, gaze fond. "I know," he says. "That's what Osamu-san said, too."
Atsumu blinks. "Osamu?"
"He also said that I should—I should give you another chance, because you like me so much it's making you stupid," Hinata says quietly, face reddening. "That you cried for me. That you'll always put me first. Is that true?"
"I—" Atsumu is blushing furiously. Stupid, wonderful Osamu. "Of course it is."
Hinata's lips are parted, just slightly. There is a lovely blush blooming on his cheeks. "So you really like me?" he finally says, voice quiet. "That—that way? You really do?"
Atsumu swallows again. "Yeah," he says. "I like you. A lot. Very much. The most."
"Oh," Hinata almost breathes. And then, just as quiet, "I like you too, Atsumu-san."
It is Atsumu's turn to blink. "You—" His voice is hoarse. "Say that again."
Hinata blushes even harder, but complies. His gaze is direct, unwavering. "I like you too."
Oh. This is it—the world falling into place. Atsumu has never felt euphoria like this before, a silvery, full-body thrill that goes through him like lightning.
"Did everyone leave?" Atsumu asks, setting down his bag. His heart is pounding in his ears.
Hinata blinks, taken aback by the sudden change in subject. "What? I—" He frowns, bemused. "I think so—"
"Yeah, I thought so too," Atsumu says, stepping closer. Then he closes the distance, and kisses Hinata deeply against the lockers. Hinata is still for a second, but then he responds with enthusiasm, kissing back and wrapping a leg around Atsumu's waist.
Finally, finally. This—it's satisfying, thrilling, warm. "I like you," Atsumu murmurs between kisses, again and again, feeling Hinata shiver. "I really like you, Shouyou-kun. I'll make you happy, I promise."
“Atsumu-san, wait,” Hinata whispers, and Atsumu raises his head to meet Hinata's eyes. Hinata's gaze is heated, his cheeks flushed. He looks like heaven. “Not here. Let’s go home first.”
Atsumu swallows. “Yours or mine?”
Hinata lays his head on Atsumu’s chest, a gesture so intimate that it makes Atsumu almost feel like tearing up. They’re both still breathing kind of hard. “Doesn’t matter,” Hinata says hoarsely. "I just want—"
"Okay," Atsumu says. He takes Hinata's hand. "Let's go."
They end up at Hinata's apartment, because Atsumu remembers that Osamu is staying over, and that won't really do for a passionate tryst in the afternoon. They're barely inside the doorway before they get back into it with fervour, shedding clothes onto the ground and kissing like they've never done it before.
Atsumu lifts up the hem of Hinata's shirt. "Bite," he says, and Hinata does, holding the fabric up with his teeth, exposing his torso. He's beautiful, really, and Atsumu makes sure to express his adoration with his mouth, his hands. Eventually, Hinata just takes the shirt off. That makes things easier.
"Atsumu-san," Hinata breathes. "That thing about the wall—" Atsumu freezes. "You wanna do it?"
Atsumu blinks. “You—” He straightens up, peppers Hinata’s face with kisses. “You’re perfect, you’re actually perfect—”
Hinata laughs. “Is that a yes?”
“Of course,” Atsumu says, still half-disbelieving. “Thank you, I—”
Hinata reaches up to stroke his cheek, smiling lazily. “Get on with it, then.”
Afterwards, once they're clean and spent and in entwined in bed, they start to talk.
“If we’re going to do this,” Hinata says, “we have to communicate properly, okay? No dumb secrets like the last one.”
Atsumu kisses his forehead. “I know. I promise.”
“That’s good, then,” Hinata says, smiling.
“Oh, then I should probably tell you—” Atsumu hesitates.
“What?” Hinata asks.
Fuck it. “That first time we hung out alone? With Kurumi?” Atsumu says. “My friend didn’t actually need me to take care of her. I asked to borrow her because—because I was scared you’d be bored.”
Hinata is already laughing before Atsumu finishes the sentence.
“Come on,” Atsumu says, embarrassed. “It’s not that funny, is it? And I ended up paying him too, I—”
Hinata laughs even harder, hiding his face in Atsumu’s chest. “I’m sorry,” he manages. “Oh, I’m sorry—” But he keeps laughing.
“Shouyou-kun,” Atsumu whines.
“I’m sorry, Atsumu-san,” Hinata says, finally keeping his laughter in check. “But that’s—I’m happy, you know. That you liked me enough to do that. That you like me at all. I’m just happy.”
Atsumu smiles and holds him closer. “I’m happy too,” he says, and means it.
To their credit, the team isn’t really surprised at the two of them starting to date. No, scratch that: they aren’t surprised at all, to the point that it’s a little insulting.
“What, so you’re screwing now?” Sakusa says after practice, rolling his eyes. “Is that even legal?”
“Don’t be so mean, Omi!” Bokuto says. “It’s nice. Atsumu’s been way too desperate for way too long, don’t you think?”
“Ugh,” Atsumu says. “Would it kill you guys to not say anything sometimes? Please? Or at least save it for when I’m not here?”
Hinata laughs. ”I think that’s just their way of saying congratulations, Atsumu-san.”
“I disagree,” says Sakusa, while Bokuto laughs.
Atsumu ignores them and turns to Hinata, softening. “You ready to go?”
“Yeah,” Hinata says, taking his hand. “Let’s head out.”
They say their goodbyes to their teammates, and walk outside into the bright afternoon. With Hinata at his side, Atsumu feels happier, stronger than he’s ever been. Even though the path they took was more than a little messy, he would take it again in a heartbeat.
“What do you want for dinner?” Hinata asks, disrupting Atsumu’s reverie.
“Curry,” Atsumu says. “Let’s make it together.” And then, “I’m so glad I met you.”
Hinata smiles at that, bright and warm. “So am I, Atsumu-san.”
Hand in hand, they walk together under the sunlight. It is a beautiful day, and they have everything to look forward to.
