Work Text:
CT-5597: shit
CT-5597: it happened again, lads
CT-5358: server restart?
CT-5597: looks like it. Sorry tup’ika
CT-5358: 
CT-5358: Jesse, there were so many memes I forgot to save!
CT-9415: yo
CT-5597: hey Hardcase
CT-9415: what the fuck
CT-9415: it’s empty
CT-5597: 
CT-5597: L A N G U A G E!!!
CT-5597: not while tup’ika is present
CT-9415: sorry tup’ika
CT-9415: but our memes!
CT-5358: i know! It’s terrible
[CT-5597 changed their name to Jessica Jones]
Jessica Jones: everybody change your names or I’m changing them for you
Jessica Jones: 'cause i got some real good ideas if you know what i mean
CT-9415: fuck
CT-5358: fuck
CT-27-5555: fuck
CT-9415: fives????!
CT-5358: ori’vod??? :D
CT-9415: aren’t you guys on a mission????
Jessica Jones: 
Jessica Jones: WATCH YOUR FUCKING L A N GU A G E YOU ASSHATS
CT-5358: frick
CT-9415: frick
[CT-27-5555 changed their name to Iron Man]
[CT-9415 changed their name to boom boom pow]
[CT-5358 changed their name to Tupperware]
[Jessica Jones changed CT-7567’s nickname to dad]
[Jessica Jones changed CT-6116’s nickname to Kix]
boom boom pow: lame
Jessica Jones: sorry, I don’t feel like DYING BY SCALPAL TODAY
[Jessica Jones changed CT-0408’s nickname to whEN WiLL yOu learn]
boom boom pow: HA
boom boom pow: he’s gonna kill you
Jessica Jones: 
Jessica Jones: he can try
boom boom pow: now there's an expression that says "there are 7 scented erasers in my butthole"
Jessica Jones: my resting face.
boom boom pow: bruh, where’d fives go?
Jessica Jones: it says he’s offline
boom boom pow: dammit
Jessica Jones: Love how he just comes online long enough to change his name
Jessica Jones: during a mission
Tupperware: hey Jesse do you still have those memes of General Kenobi?
Jessica Jones: noooo...
Tupperware: that's it
Jessica Jones: ???
Tupperware: j-just...
Tupperware: Just pull the plug
Tupperware: there's nothing here left for me
Tupperware: 
boom boom pow: No!
boom boom pow: vod wait!
boom boom pow: I've got the memes!
Tupperware: really??? !!!!
Tupperware: 
Tupperware: i Just want the “grain gone rogue” one
boom boom pow: YES
Jessica Jones: NO
boom boom pow: YES I HAVE THAT ONE
Jessica Jones: NO I HATE THAT ONE
Jessica Jones: ITS CURSED
Jessica Jones: WHAT THE HELL DOES IT EVEN MEAN
Tupperware: pwease???
Jessica Jones: NO ABSOLUTELY NOT
Jessica Jones: Hardcase if you post that image you’re dead to me
Tupperware: pwetty pwease?
Tupperware: for your vod’ika?
Tupperware: 
Jessica Jones: you will literally be the family disappointment Hardcase
Jessica Jones: I love you tup, but this is an intervention
Jessica Jones: it’s a bad meme
Jessica Jones: a bad bad meme
Jessica Jones: it’s cursed
[Tupperware changed their name to teeny tiny tup’ika]
teeny tiny tup’ika: don’t listen to him, Hardcase
teeny tiny tup’ika: don’t listen to the bad, bad man
teeny tiny tup’ika: listen to me
teeny tiny tup’ika: Your ittiest bittiest vod’ika
teeny tiny tup’ika: I need It Hardcase
teeny tiny tup’ika: I need it like I need air
Boom boom pow: 
Jessica Jones: NO
teeny tiny tup’ika: YES
[Jessica Jones changed Boom boom pow’s nickname to family disappointment]
[Jessica Jones changed teeny tiny tup’ika’s nickname to manipulative little shit]
family disappointment: bro...
manipulative little shit: . . .
manipulative little shit: 
family disappointment: NO
Jessica Jones: NO WAIT
family disappointment: LOOK AT WHAT YOUVE DONE
manipulative little shit: i cry rn
family disappointment: HE CRY RN
Jessica Jones: TUP NO IM SORRY I DIDNT MEAN IT
manipulative little shit: Brother is...evil? Brother is unyielding? Brother is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.
[family disappointment changed Jessica Jones’s nickname to absolute monster]
absolute monster: tup pls come back
absolute monster: I’ll buy you ice cream if you come back
[absolute monster changed manipulative little shit’s name to best brother]
best brother: . . .
best brother: I’m listening
absolute monster: any flavor you want
best brother: as much as I want?
absolute monster: yes
best brother: and chicken strips?
family disappointment: you never offer me ice cream and chicken strips when you hurt my feelings
absolute monster: that’s because I hurt your feelings on purpose
family disappointment: kinky
absolute monster: ????
absolute monster: excuse me???
family disappointment: kinky
absolute monster: I SAW IT THE FIRST TIME THANKS
best brother: kinky
absolute monster: TUP DONT START KNOCK IT OFF
family disappointment: kinky
absolute monster: do you-
absolute monster: do you even know what that means?
family disappointment: yeah
family disappointment: it’s slang
absolute monster: correct....
family disappointment: it’s like calling someone rude
absolute monster: no
family disappointment: like bitch
absolute monster: no
family disappointment: you hella kinky
absolute monster: no
family disappointment: you’re a real bitch
absolute monster: n o
family disappointment: which is a big mood
absolute monster: s t o p
family disappointment: y u so kinky to me
[absolute monster has kicked family disappointment from the chat]
best brother: you killed him
absolute monster: it was for the greater good
best brother: kinky
Iron Man: Guess who got stung by bees
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: Fives! Echo! You’re back! How was the mission?
Kix: you changed names! D:
they do move in herds: server restart
Kix: dammit. We had some good memes.
dad: Everybody do rollcall
Kix: Kix.
Iron Man: wow thanks because that wasn’t obvious
Kix: I will shiv you in your kidneys.
Iron Man: 
Iron Man: 
they do move in herds: Jesse
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: Tup!
Iron Man: Fives!
dad: Where is Hardcase?
they do move in herds: timeout
whEN WiLL yOu leARn: tupikaaaa!
whEN WiLL yOu leARn: it wds tiud! we hust git bask a few gours ago
whEN WiLL yOu leARn: hey! who chagbed my name D:
Iron Man: OKAY BUT GUESS WHO GOT STUNG BY BEES
they do move in herds: echo, you good bro?
[whEN WiLL yOu leARn changed their nickname to Ecgu]
Iron Man: Ecgu
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: Ecgu
they do move in herds: Ecgu
Kix: Ecgu
Ecgu: thid is harassment
Iron Man: okay but guess who got stung by BEES
dad: fives probably
Iron Man: I’m offended that you would think so little of me!
[Ecgu changed their name to Exjo]
dad: YOU WERE LITERALLY THROWING ROCKS AT A WASPS NEST
Iron Man: NO I WAS NOT
Iron Man: THIS IS SLANDER
[Exjo changed their nickname to Rvho]
Iron Man: IT WAS THAT SHINY FROM 212
Iron Man: he didn’t have a name and he said he wanted one
they do move in herds: ???
dad: ... And?
Iron Man: and I said
Iron Man: hey kid, im an arc trooper. I can help you earn your name
Iron Man: and I gave him some rocks
[dad changed Iron Man’s nickname to dumbass]
dumbass: D:
dumbass: you wound me
dumbass: I was only trying to help a fellow vod
they do move in herds: did it work
dumbass: yeah
dumbass: I heard helix calling him ‘Bees’ before we left
dad: poor kid
they do move in herds: Ha!
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: Hardcase wants to know if he can be out of timeout now
[Rvho changed their name to Wcho]
dad: yes, Hardcase, you can be out of timeout now.
Wcho: pls help
[CT-9415 has been added to the chat]
CT-9415: I am FREEEE
[CT-9415 changed their name to I’m Back Bitch]
I’m Back Bitch: you guys are BACK!
[I’m Back Bitch changed their nickname to Brittany Bitch]
they do move in herds: youre not valid
Brittany Bitch: fuck you
Brittany Bitch: how was the mission?
dumbass: Echo got stung by bees
Brittany Bitch: lol rip
Brittany Bitch : Wait! who is dumbass?
dumbass: fives
Brittany Bitch: Why is fives dumbass??
Brittany Bitch: 
they do move in herds: lololol get rekt
[dad changed Brittany Bitch's nickname to dumbass2]
dumbass2: 
dumbass2: THANK!
[Wcho changed their name to Rvho]
Rvho: DSMMIT
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: Echo are you okay?
Rvho: in fine
dumbass: Hes fine
they do move in herds: is he tho?
dumbass: yis
dumbass: he’s good
Kix: get your asses down to medical dipshits
dumbass: Medical Dipshits? I don’t know where medical dipshits is
dumbass: is that on the third or fourth level?
dad: commas are important Kix
Kix: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
they do move in herds: 👀
dad: fuck
[dad changed Kix’s nickname to Murder Spree]
[Murder Spree changed their nickname to Murder Spree👺]
dumbass2: press f in chat to pay respects to fives
they do move in herds: f
dad: f
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: f
dumbass2: f
Rvho: d
they do move in herds: D!
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: D!
dad: D!
dumbass2: D!!!
dumbass: D
Rvho: harrasdmevt!!
dad: Kix what the HELL is that THING in your username
dad: THANKS I SAW THAT WHAT IS IT
Murder Spree👺: it’s meant to inspire fear
they do move in herds: it inspires something alright
dumbass: no, no it’s absolutely working
[Rvho changed their name to Exho]
[Exho changed their name to Wchi]
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: Echo?? Do you need help???
dumbass: vod, Im sitting right next to him, watching this happen
[dad changed Wchi’s name to Echo]
dumbass: I think he’s crying
dumbass: REX!!! Noooo
Echo: Thank u tex
Echo: tex
Echo: tex
Echo: tex
Echo: r e x
dumbass: lol loser
d️umbass: I love you vod
[dumbass changed Echo’s nickname to Wcho]
dad: be nice to your brother, fives D:<
dumbass: I AM BEING NICE I SAID I LOVED HIM
dad: IT DIDNT FEEL SINCERE
Wcho: i Can’t feel my skin
Murder Spree👺: GO TO MEDICAL
dumbass2: kinky?
they do move in herds: No!!!!
they do move in herds: YOU ARE STILL WRONG
dumbass2: THEN TELL ME WHAT IT MEANS
they do move in herds: YOU CANT JUST THROW THAT WORD IN WHEREVER THE HELL YOU WANT
dumbass2: TELL ME
dumbass: nobody tell him
dumbass2: you guys are the WORST
Murder Spree👺: https://youtu.be/IjAkiO_wrg8
Murder Spree👺: how do I get a new family
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: 🥺
Murder Spree👺: except you tup’ika
Murder Spree👺: you can stay
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings:
dumbass: hey
dumbass: quick question
dumbass: Kix
dumbass: does this look bad
dumbass: 
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: !!!!!
they do move in herds: Echo!
dumbass2: holy shit
dad: 
Murder Spree👺: BRING HIM TO MEDICAL YOU STUPID STUPID
Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings: f
dumbass2: f
dad: f
they do move in herds: f
[Cracker Barrel’s Chicken and Tuplings changes their name to Tuppersaurus]
Tuppersaurus: reeeex
dad: yes, vod’ika?
Tuppersaurus: can you come braid my hair before bed
dad: sure
they do move in herds: HEY
they do move in herds: Why don’t you ever braid my hair?
dad: you’ve never asked
they do move in herds: Rex will you braid my hair?
dad: no
they do move in herds: but whyyyy?
dad: because I do not like you
[Murder Spree👺 changed they do move in herds’s nickname to Baldi’s Basics]
Murder Spree👺: it may also have something to do with your lack of hair, vod
dad: it does not
dad: I just don’t like him
Baldi’s Basics: 
dumbass2: HA
Murder Spree👺: HA
[dumbass2 change Baldi’s Basics’s nickname to Basic Bitch]
Basic Bitch: RUDE
Basic Bitch: this is ABUSE
Murder Spree👺: what the FUCK is this
dumbass2: what is it
Murder Spree👺: ITS IN MY BED
Basic Bitch: what is it
Murder Spree👺: IT HAS SPINES
Basic Bitch: WHAT IS IT
dumbass2: what is it
Murder Spree👺: 
Murder Spree👺: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
Basic Bitch: oh fuck
Basic Bitch: That’s Mooncake!
Murder Spree👺: WHO THE FUCK IS MOONCAKE
dumbass2: oh shit that’s where she went
Murder Spree👺: EXCUSE ME
Basic Bitch: we picked her up on Trewlanus III
Murder Spree👺: THAT MISSION WAS SIX MONTHS AGO
dumbass2: correct
Murder Spree👺: YOU DIPSHITS HAVE BEEN KEEPING AN ANIMAL ON THE SHIP FOR SIX MONTHS
Basic Bitch: duh?
dumbass2: very astute observation
Basic Bitch: you have a braincell, vod, Im so proud!
dumbass2: yeah, what, did you think we just fucked off back to Trewlanus III in our free time???
Basic Bitch: free time that we don’t have???
[dumbass2 changed Murder Spree👺’s nickname to Captain Obvious]
Captain Obvious: you are both dead to me
Basic Bitch: oh
dumbass2: oh
Basic Bitch: hi my name is Dead To Me what’s your name?
dumbass2: what? No way, my name is Dead To Me too!!!
Basic Bitch: What!!! A! Coincidence!!
Captain Obvious: my blood pressure literally just tripled.
dumbass2: but if you’re Dead To Me, and I’m Dead To Me, then who’s flying this plane???
Basic Bitch: HA
Basic Bitch: meme
Captain Obvious: WOULD YOU TWO PLEASE STOP FUCKING FOR TWO SECONDS
Captain Obvious: *FUCKING AROUND
dumbass2: 
Basic Bitch: KIX
dumbass2: WHAT THE FUCK VOD
Basic Bitch: 
dumbass2: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU
Captain Obvious: THAT ISNT WHAT I MEANT AND YOU KNOW IT
Captain Obvious: COME COLLECT YOUR FUCKING PET
Basic Bitch: a fucking pet?
Basic Bitch:
Captain Obvious: you used that meme twice in a row
Captain Obvious: I'm docking you 10 points
Basic Bitch: WHAT!
Basic Bitch: You can't do that!
dumbass2: 
Captain Obvious: okay, lets stop with the memes
Basic Bitch: 
dumbass2: kinky
Basic Bitch: 
Basic Bitch: how do I uninstall a family member
Captain Obvious: you two are about three seconds away from find out.
Basic Bitch: 
Captain Obvious: enoUGH WITH THE MEMES
dumbass2: 
Basic Bitch: 
Captain Obvious: why NOT
Basic Bitch: 
Captain Obvious: alright fuckers. You wanna play that game? Sleep with one eye open. Tonight, I'm coming for your knee caps. I'm gonna steal 'em, then I'm gonna swallow 'em.
dumbass2: OH MY GOD
dumbass2: WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVER MEAN
Basic Bitch: MERCY PLS
dumbass2: I'M VISCERALLY DISTURBED. MY SKIN IS LITERALLY CRAWLING
Basic Bitch: WE'RE DONE WITH THE MEMES WE PROMISE
dumbass2: WE SWEAR WE'RE DONE
Captain Obvious: Good.
dad: look!
dad: 
dumbass2: 
Basic Bitch: Hardcase
Basic Bitch: ?
dumbass2: he post picture
dumbass2: kix be merciful, he didn't know
Basic Bitch: h-hardcase...
dumbass2: oh wait
dumbass2: oh FUCK
dumbass2: shit I fucked up
dumbass2: HAVE MERCY
dad: ???
dad: Do I want to know?
Captain Obvious: probably not.
Captain Obvious: Tup, looks good by the way.
Tuppersaurus:
Tuppersaurus: Thanks!
dumbass2: TUP NO
Captain Obvious: its okay.
Captain Obvious: I like Tup
Captain Obvious: He's safe.
Captain Obvious: But you two on the other hand...
Captain Obvious: You're on thin fucking ice.
Captain Obvious: I will Literally Fling you into the Orb.
Tuppersaurus: 
Captain Obvious: god, the mullet.
Wcho: pretty
Tuppersaurus: Echo! How do you feel?
Basic Bitch: he's literally so far gone for Kenobi
dad: what?
Basic Bitch: I MEAN
Basic Bitch: nothing
Basic Bitch: He loves regs.
Captain Obvious: Echo, put down the DAMN DATA PAD YOU'RE MEANT TO BE RESTING
dumbass2: rip
dad: so anyways... tup's hair
dad: he looks like pippy long stockings
Captain Obvious: Who the fuck is that
Tuppersaurus: me, bitch
Captain Obvious: no, WHO THE FUCK PIPPY LONG STOCKINGS
Tuppersaurus: ME, BITCH
Captain Obvious: I am *this* close to crying
Tuppersaurus: your fingers are touching
Captain Obvious: *weeping* I know
Basic Bitch: Mooncake returned
Basic Bitch: lookit how happy she is with ‘Case 🥰
Captain Obvious: is... is there a picture coming?
Basic Bitch: yeah
Basic Bitch: Wait
Basic Bitch: hold on
Basic Bitch: its sending
dad: You guys lost mooncake???
Captain Obvious: YOU KNEW ABOUT MOONCAKE?
dad: yes??? Did you not??
Captain Obvious: NO
dad: maybe grow a pair of eyes Kix
dumbass2: lolololol
dumbass2: OH MY GOD I JUST HAD THE BEST IDEA
[dumbass2 changed their name to CT-7567]
CT-7567: guys
CT-7567: im rex now
[dad has kicked CT-7567 from the chat]
dad: blocked blocked all of you are blocked none of you are free from sin
Captain Obvious: so Jesse
Captain Obvious: About that picture???
Basic Bitch: it’s almost sent
Basic Bitch: CakeAndCase.wav
dad: Jesse I can’t open it
Captain Obvious: why the fuck is it a .wav file???
Basic Bitch: I don’t know?
Basic Bitch: hold on I’m trying to fix it
Captain Obvious: a .jpg is a picture, a .wav is for audio?
Basic Bitch: I’m trying to fix it
Captain Obvious: how did you even manage to fuck that up?
Basic Bitch: I don’t know stop yelling at me
dad: WHY IS IT A .WAV FILE JESSE
Basic Bitch: I DONT KNOW IM TRYING TO FIX IT
Captain Obvious: brb echo’s throat is closing up
[Captain Obvious added CT-9415 to the chat]
[CT-9415 changed their name to A Changed Man]
A Changed Man: Im sowee wex
dad: never say that again
Captain Obvious: Good news, Echo is going to be okay
Tuppersaurus: yay! That’s good!
Captain Obvious: ya Wanna see something soft?
Tuppersaurus: yes!!!
Captain Obvious: 
Tuppersaurus: Aw!!! They do love each other!
Basic Bitch: domino twins are best twins
A Changed Man: sibling goals
Captain Obvious: imma use this to blackmail the shit outta fives
dad: Kix, How the hell did you take that picture?
Captain Obvious: I’m sure I don’t know what you mean?
dad: it’s like... right over them
dad: how did you even manage to take it
dad: did you duck tape yourself to the underside of the top bunk or something?
Captain Obvious: ...
Captain Obvious: I literally just leaned over them and snapped the picture
Captain Obvious: Captain, I am literally begging you to go get sleep
dad: fair
Basic Bitch: Kix, vod, why don’t you ever hold me like that?
Captain Obvious: because I do not like you
Basic Bitch: you stole that line from Rex
Captain Obvious: you stole all of your braincells from Hardcase
A Changed Man: mom says it’s my turn to use the braincells
Tuppersaurus: hey Echo’s face is looking better
Captain Obvious: swelling went down
dad: To Echo - Get well soon!
dad: To fives - You have KP duty until the day you die
dad: To Everybody else - go the fuck to sleep
Tuppersaurus: can I have a bedtime story
dad: sure
Tuppersaurus: 
A Changed Man: r-rex?
Basic Bitch: Rex What the fuck kind of bed time story is that
Captain Obvious: no, no I think it’s a great story. I liked it
dad: oh fuck
dad: wrong one
dad: I’m sending that one to Cody :)
Captain Obvious: Ah.
Basic Bitch: General wimdy?
Captain Obvious: it’s fuckin WIMDY
dad: that is best meme. Let’s bring that meme back
Captain Obvious: 
Captain Obvious: I literally just need somebody to photoshop General Windu's face onto that fox
Captain Obvious: But... like... add hair, just to demonstrate the wind
Basic Bitch: yoooo
Basic Bitch: speaking of good memes
Basic Bitch: check out this fucker
Basic Bitch: 
Basic Bitch: thoughts?
[dad changed their nickname to THE FLAMING HEAD]
THE FLAMING HEAD: ya that meme is alright
Basic Bitch: you fuckin lie, that’s a great meme
A Changed Man: You know whAt else is a great meme
A Changed Man:
Basic Bitch: NO
[Basic Bitch has kicked A Changed Man from the chat]