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“Kihyun, where in the world are we going? It’s been ten minutes since we drove past the McDonald’s drive-thru. I just didn’t say anything because I know how annoyed you get when I try to tell you the directions.” Silence. “Hello?” Changkyun looked over to Kihyun in the driver’s seat, seeing him bite his bottom lip nervously.
“We aren’t going to McDonald’s, are we?” Kihyun apologetically looked over to Changkyun before focusing his eyes on the road again.
He let his bottom lip go and opened his mouth for the first time since they got into the car. They usually don’t talk when Kihyun is driving since he deems it too much of a distraction and he rather focuses his full attention on driving.
“Well, you know, it’s more like- “, Kihyun sighed, “Sorry.” The inkling feeling he’s been having the whole time that this is planned proves itself to be right.
“Are you at least going to tell me where we are heading?” Kihyun was silent again and Changkyun groaned, throwing his head back against the headrest and looking out of the window at the passing trees. Of course.
It wasn’t long until Kihyun turned and the car stopped in a parking lot of a restaurant. Definitely the kind that looks like you will spend your entire year’s salary on a single microscopic serving of boogie pasta.
“Wait, isn’t that the new fancy restaurant you told me about? Kihyun, what are we doing here? I know you said we were going out to eat, but I genuinely thought you meant a fast-food restaurant not… this. Are you going to propose to me again for free dessert?”
Kihyun scoffed and groaned. “That was one time and I said I would never do it again! That night gave me enough embarrassment for the next few years.” He shivered, hiding his face in his hands. “I can’t believe I did that for a stupid piece of cake.”
“Well, it was one hell of a good piece of cake that they charged way too much money for, so no regrets. 10/10 would do it again.” Kihyun looked over to Changkyun and squinted his eyes. “Of course, you would.”
"Besides, the other guests there really seemed to enjoy the show. My crying must have been pretty convincing. I tried extra hard to make it look realistic. You know", he used his index finger to point under his nose, "snot and all." Kihyun contorted his face in disgust.
"Yeah, it was pretty gross."
"Well, you were the one getting it all in your mouth since you were so sure a kiss would be necessary to really sell that performance." Definitely didn't forget that one.
"Don't remind me", Kihyun whined.
“So, why are we really here? I should have known we weren’t going to some random fast-food restaurant the second I saw you all dressed up. I mean, you even put makeup on! I just thought you had the hots for one of the waiters working there or something. I’m definitely not dressed appropriately for the standard of this place.” Changkyun looked down at his hoodie that he combined with a random pair of jeans he found at the back of his wardrobe.
“Remember Hoseok?” Changkyun looked up swiftly.
“Hoseok? Your ex-boyfriend Hoseok? That Hoseok?” Kihyun nodded, not looking at Changkyun.
“Well, he’s throwing an engagement party.”
Oh my God. Changkyun started shaking his head. “No, no, no. Kihyun, you aren’t seriously telling me we’re here for your ex-boyfriend’s engagement party. What the-“, Changkyun inhaled, “Okay, what the hell are we doing here?” Kihyun started fiddling with his fingers.
“He kind of… invited me.”
“He invited you to his engagement party?! What is he trying to do? Rub the fact in your face that he left you for that guy?” Kihyun shrugged, still fiddling with his fingers. “You know I can’t stand him.” Changkyun let his head fall against the headrest again and closed his eyes.
“I told him I moved on and got a new boyfriend”, Kihyun mumbled and Changkyun groaned.
“Are you kidding me? Kihyun, as your best friend I’m obligated to call you out for being insane. Who is it? What does he do for a living, being a full-time imaginary boyfriend?”, he laughed, waiting for something to come out of Kihyun’s mouth, but he just kept biting his lip. Yep, feeling guilty. It's going to start bleeding if he keeps doing that.
“Wait a minute. Kihyun, why am I here? Are you going to tell him your boyfriend went on a business trip last minute? I’m not too sure if Hoseok will be happy to see me at his engagement party, especially after your break-up. He never liked me to begin with.” Kihyun ran his fingers through his perfectly done hair. Not a single strand out of place. That really should have been an indicator, huh. He never puts that much effort into his appearance for a simple night out to grab greasy food.
“I didn’t tell him my fake boyfriend can’t come.”
“Okay, so what are you going to do if he asks about your new love interest, huh?” There was silence again but Kihyun looked apologetically at Changkyun for the second time that evening.
“Why are you looking at me like that? …Oh no, Kihyun, no. No. You want me to be your boyfriend?”
“Fiancé”, Kihyun corrected.
“Fiancé, right. Kihyun, I can’t. Hoseok always thought I was in love with you and something was going on between us when you two were dating. I don’t want to give him even more reasons to think that he was right the whole time. No, I can’t. And don’t even try to pull the but you’re my best friend card. That has gotten me in so much trouble since we were kids.”
Changkyun didn’t even have to look over to his left side to see Kihyun’s puppy eyes and pout. “Oh, come on, not the puppy eyes.” He shoved his face into Changkyun’s, intensifying his pout. “Kihyun”, Changkyun whined, sighing right after.
“Fine. But you owe me a nice dinner at my favorite restaurant.” Kihyun laughed and cheered. He always gets what he wants.
“Sure.”
“No, no, no. A nice one. A three-course meal and the whole shebang.” He could almost feel the eye roll on the other side of the car. “I know, I know. I’m your favorite person in the whole entire world.” Changkyun giggled and Kihyun pulled the car key out.
“Whatever. We should head in if we want to be on time.”
They got out and walked up to the building after locking the car.
“You could have at least told me to wear nicer pants than my old jeans.”
“You look fine to me, so I don’t know what you’re complaining about”, Kihyun shrugged.
Changkyun stopped in his tracks and let out a nervous laugh. I will probably never get used to the compliments. Still making my heart flutter like on day one.
“Thank you, but it’s too late to be trying to flatter me. You dragged me here under false pretenses.” He sighed. “There better be a bar.” Kihyun turned around and glared at him.
“What? I’m trying to see the more positive sides of this situation. Seeing your ex-boyfriend is definitely not one of them, but at least there will be free food. And liquor, if I’m lucky enough. Stop frowning like that, your eyebrows will get stuck.” Changkyun walked the few steps to Kihyun and poked the crease between his eyebrows. He took his hand and pulled him towards the building. Soft. His sight wandered down to their hands, noticing that something was missing.
“If we are going to do this, we need to make this look real. You forgot the ring.” Changkyun held Kihyun’s hand up and pointed at his ring finger. Kihyun groaned, hand against his forehead.
“Damnit. I forgot to put one on because I was in such a hurry.”
“Lucky for you, I always wear more than enough.” He let go of Kihyun's hand to hold his own hands up and wiggle his fingers. There were indeed multiple rings adorning most of them. “Keep your hand there.” Changkyun looked at his hands and fumbled with his rings, taking off the one that could pass the most as an engagement ring and holding it up for Kihyun to see.
“Here we go. I hope it will fit and not look off. Your fingers are minuscule, really, how is that possible?” Kihyun scoffed and hit Changkyun softly with the hand that he wasn’t holding up in the air between them. Changkyun held his arm, gasping dramatically and trying to look shocked.
“Ow! What was that for?”
“Don’t act like you didn’t just call my fingers tiny!”
“What, you want me to lie?” Kihyun rolled his eyes again. “Yeah, yeah, keep rolling your eyes. Now give me your left hand, so I can put the ring on.” Changkyun held it steady to slide the ring on Kihyun’s left ring finger. Pretty. Looks like it was made for him.
“Take good care of it. It’s my favorite one.”
“Changkyun, I can’t. What if I lose it?”
“You won’t, I know you won’t. I know I can trust you and you always take good care of things that are important to other people.” Kihyun smiled softly and nodded.
“Have you thought about our proposal story, yet? Any ideas? We have to talk about how super romantic my proposal last week was. Somewhere picturesque and romantic like… Venice. Or maybe Japan, under all the cherry blossoms. Although I guess that’s pretty hard to convince Hoseok of, considering that it’s fall, so maybe not that.”
“Disney World”, Kihyun interjected.
“Disney World. You seriously want to tell him Disney World? Out of all places? That’s the most cliché way to propose to someone! You know exactly I wouldn’t do it somewhere as boring as Disney World. I can be more creative than that, give me a little more credit!” Kihyun crossed his arms as if Changkyun personally offended him.
“What’s wrong with Disney World?”
“Everything”, Changkyun snorted. He sighed. “Fine, I proposed at Disney World in front of the castle and everyone was crying with joy. Whatever you want, honey. Are you satisfied now? Let’s go.”
The closer they got to the restaurant, the louder the obnoxious techno music got. One hundred percent the doing of Hoseok’s fiancé. Didn’t Kihyun mention that he likes to DJ in nightclubs on the weekends? Changkyun held the door open for Kihyun to enter. Stepping inside they looked around, trying to take everything in. Pink, white, gold, and flowers. A lot of them. Pretty much looking like every engagement party that has ever existed. Very original. The creativity here is astounding, honestly.
“Alright, I’m going to intertwine our fingers and we’ll try and look like we desperately want to be here, okay?”
“Aren’t you happy to be here with me?”, Kihyun asked fake hurt.
“Of course, I am. But I would honestly rather be anywhere else but here. You get me in the craziest situations sometimes. Remember that night when you-“, Changkyun spotted Hoseok from the corner of his eye, “Oh wait, your ex is coming our way. Remember, we are the perfect happy couple with Disney magic.” Kihyun nodded and squeezed Changkyun’s hand.
“Oh, hi there! Congratulations on wanting to tie the knot!”
“Yeah, congratulations. It means a lot that you wanted us here tonight”, Kihyun added.
“Thank you. Glad to see you here”, Hoseok looked at Kihyun, “but why is he here?” He pointed at Changkyun with his thumb, not even bothering to bestow him as much as a glance. Changkyun scoffed on the inside. Still the same as ever. Absolutely nothing has changed.
“Oh, he didn’t tell you? We got together a few months after you two-“, Changkyun stopped himself and breathed in sharply as if hurt, putting on a fake apologetic smile, “Ooh, yeah… I... just realized I was in love with him and I couldn’t let him almost get away from me again.” He chuckled. “I just… adore him so much.”
Changkyun looked over to Kihyun, smiling softly at him as he took his time to take in each and every single one of his features. Coffee colored, curious and soft eyes, long eyelashes, barely-there freckles every now and then on his cheeks, mole next to the corner of his mouth. So Kissable. He felt Kihyun’s thumb rubbing softly over the back of his hand. Changkyun’s heart squeezed weirdly. Stupid thing, not now. And just like Changkyun’s heart squeezed, he squeezed Kihyun’s hand, running his thumb over the cold, smooth silver band on his finger. I mean it.
Kihyun smiled and looked back and forth between Changkyun’s eyes. Changkyun doesn’t know what made him do it and where he suddenly got the courage from, but he leaned in and kissed Kihyun on his left cheek. Surprise quickly took over Kihyun’s face, a slight hint of red dusting over his cheeks and ears. Changkyun leaned in again and moved closer to his ear.
“He looks annoyed that we’re happy”, he whispered and let out a small laugh. Kihyun shivered slightly, almost unnoticeably, if Changkyun wasn’t so close. “I swear, you’re a terrible influence on me. I’m bragging at his engagement party.” Changkyun kissed his cheek again, definitely warmer than before with all the blood rushing into them, before turning back to Hoseok.
“Sorry, I was just asking Kihyun, if we could share our news with you or… whether it’d be inappropriate, being your engagement celebration, and all. I just can’t wait to tell everybody that we’ve made it official!” I should have become an actor. Changkyun made an unnecessarily long and dramatic pause.
“We’ve only just returned from our holiday, and I asked him to marry me. Isn’t that amazing?”
“At Disney World!”, Kihyun added proudly and smiled small. Adorable. Changkyun chuckled.
“Yes, like he said, at Disney World. It’s always been a dream for that to happen, right?” He looked expectantly to Kihyun who nodded.
“It was so unexpected but all the more surprising.”
“Whatever my sweetheart wants, I try to make it happen. He deserves to be happy. I want him to know just how much I love him.” He felt a little tug on his hand and smiled without taking his eyes away from Hoseok. Said person smiled awkwardly.
“Right, uhm, excuse me, I will have to leave you alone for now.” Kihyun cleared his throat.
“Uhm, yes… Sorry. Of course, you must have other guests to welcome. It wasn’t our intention to keep you for ourselves for this long.”
“Sorry about that. Sometimes I just get lost in my thoughts when I look at him”, Changkyun added. True.
“Right. Nothing to apologize about, don’t worry. Uhm… I see you later, maybe?”, he laughed nervously. It didn’t take a genius to see that he would definitely not seek another conversation with them, or rather with Kihyun. Not really acknowledging my presence, is he?
“Sure”, Kihyun rubbed his neck with his free hand, “Well, I hope you have a good night. Congrats again! We hope you have a great wedding and honeymoon.” The smile that was grazing Kihyun’s lips was strenuous and looked anything but genuine. Hoseok gave him a quick, small smile that didn’t even reach his eyes and left as fast as he came. The song playing in the background switched from the obnoxious noises to a soft slow song.
“Ugh. Thank God, he’s gone”, Kihyun said.
“He doesn’t get any more interesting, does he?”
“As interesting as a blank piece of paper. Always been like that and I don’t think it will ever change. Don’t know what Hyungwon sees in him, or heck, what I saw in him, but if they’re happy, then sure.” It looked like he meant what he was saying.
“Do you think he bought that performance?”
“We were pretty convincing if you ask me. You could have at least given me a warning when you decided to kiss me just like that, out of nowhere.”
“Where would be the fun in that? Besides your surprised face was genuine and made it more authentic and convincing. It was just a kiss on the cheek. It was nothing.” Well, it certainly wasn’t nothing to you, if your fast heartbeat was anything to go by. Stupid, defective thing. “Come on, let’s dance. I know you love this song and I can see you tapping your foot.” Cute. “It’ll be fun.”
“Changkyun”, Kihyun whined but Changkyun didn’t pay any attention to that and took Kihyun’s hand to pull him to the dancefloor located in the middle of the room, surrounded by neatly decorated tables.
“I know. You say you’re a terrible dancer, but if you put your arms around my neck… like so…”, Changkyun took Kihyun’s arms and put them around his neck, “And I put my hands here… on your hips… like this…” Changkyun did exactly that, softly at first, touching his hips with his fingertips as if asking for permission to touch him and only putting his hands there, after Kihyun didn’t object. “And we just sway a little, and uh…”, they giggled, “I’ll do the rest, okay?”
They swayed a bit from left to right and from right to left, slowly turning in circles. Kihyun sighed through his nose. “I guess this is fine. I mean, it looks like it works.”
“See!”, Changkyun chuckled.
They danced for a while, Kihyun putting his head on Changkyun’s shoulder and getting comfortable.
“I know I’m talking a lot”, Changkyun laughed uneasy, “I always do, when I get nervous.”
“Why are you nervous?”
“I- I guess it’s the… pressure?” Kihyun lifted his head and tilted it, looking intently at Changkyun, as if saying that he knows there’s more to it.
“Alright, alright. I just feel like… I don’t know. I didn’t realize how long I’ve wanted to say that to you for-“, Changkyun sighed, “For years.”
“Say what?” Kihyun was clearly confused and his frown appeared again.
“To… To say that- to say that I’m… To say that I am in love with you. I don’t- I don’t want to make things awkward.” Kihyun stopped dancing and pulled back a little to look at him. Now, that’s a shocked face.
“Wait, what? How long have you been feeling like that about me?”, Kihyun sputtered. Changkyun inhaled.
“God, uhm… How long have we been friends? Since we were six, right?” He laughed nervously, unease spreading in his body. He swallowed.
“Yeah, since we were six.”
“Then… since the moment we met.” Changkyun’s hands were shaking a little against Kihyun’s hips and he desperately tried to swallow down the lump in his throat that seemed to grow bigger and bigger with each passing second. “Every bad relationship you’ve had and every heartbreak you’ve suffered through… I just wanted to tell you that I wouldn’t treat you like that because I… am… in love with you. But you’d always thank me for being your best friend and… you know, I couldn’t tell you that and…” Changkyun let a breath out that he seemed to have kept inside since forever. Kihyun was looking back and forth again between Changkyun’s eyes, mouth agape.
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”
“I’m only telling you now because I can’t keep acting like I’m not… dying to kiss you every time your lips pucker when you’re trying to concentrate, or you pout when you don’t get what you want. I can’t keep pretending that I don’t want to wrap my arms around you when your back is turned to me or that I don’t lie awake at night wondering what it’d be like to wake up next to you and be there when you open your eyes and… smile at me.” Talking was getting harder with each word. Kihyun stared at Changkyun. The latter laughed small, swallowed, and furrowed his brows.
“Hah, uhm”, another nervous chuckle, “I… uhm… I can- I can get an uber home. I realize how awkward this must be for you. I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. Look, I- I understand if you want me to leave you alone for a while, so… you can figure out how to turn me down without feeling guilty or whatever but, uh-“
“I love you, too.”
His heart stopped beating for a second before it started racing. Hopeless thing, seriously.
“Bu- Huh. No, you can’t mean- Uh. S- Say that- Say that again?” Kihyun smiled softly.
“I love you, too”, he emphasized all four words, his smile growing bigger with each word that passed his lips. Oh no, the whisker dimples.
“B- But you never said anything!”
“You didn’t either!”, Kihyun laughs.
“Touché”, Changkyun couldn’t help but laugh, too, “B-But I…”
Kihyun pulled him closer again, putting his head back where it was in the beginning. Please don’t let him feel that stupid thing in my chest. Ugh, it’s like a hummingbird trapped in a cage.
“Don’t leave me alone, okay?”
“I’m… I-I’m not going anywhere, I promise. I won’t leave you here alone at the engagement party.”
“No”, Kihyun shook his head as well as he could while still resting on Changkyun's shoulder, “I mean don’t leave me alone to think things through.”
“Oh, right. Well, uhm… Okay, I- I promise I won’t do that either.” Changkyun squeezed Kihyun’s hips lightly, a silent ‘I’m here’.
“Do you mind if we go?”, asked Kihyun. Changkyun wrapped one of his arms around Kihyun’s waist and pulled him even closer. Don’t want to let go.
“Well, we don’t have to stay here, if you don’t want to. We could get ice cream and talk things through. Guess there’s a lot we’ve never said to each other.” Kihyun lifted his head again and looked at Changkyun, biting his teeth together.
“We just arrived here, oops.”
“Yes, I know we only got here like… however many minutes ago. Well, uhm, how about… we dance until the end of this song?”
“Deal”, Kihyun smiled.
“You’re not such a bad dancer, after all, my love. You look… beautiful tonight, by the way. I should’ve said that to you earlier. You could outshine Hoseok’s fiancé if we stay longer, so we better be kind and uh- go before we ruin his evening.” They giggled. Kihyun took his arms away from Changkyun’s neck, spotting the silver band on his finger.
“Oh, do you want your ring back?”
“Oh, right, the ring. Uhm… no. Keep it on. I like seeing it and thinking about our imaginary Disney engagement. I wonder if Mickey and Minnie were there.” Kihyun chuckled. “One day- One day I’ll get you a real one. I promise. But that’s a conversation to have some other time.”
Kihyun’s smile turned into a pout, eyes growing misty.
“Shh, no crying, let’s go. We can be a love story stereotype and split a sundae.”
“Excuse me, we will get two! What makes you think I want to share mine?” Changkyun laughs. There he is.
“Alright. Fine. We can get two, so you don’t miss out on ice cream, jeez… This is why I’m in love with you.”
“Say that again.”
“Say what again, I love you?” Kihyun nods, smile not leaving his face. Changkyun laughed.
“I’ll say it to you so often, you’ll get tired of hearing it. I love you. More than anything… or anybody… And I mean it.”