Chapter Text
“Thank you very very much for watching. I hope you enjoyed this episode. And I shall see you in the next one. Gooooodbye!”
A few more seconds were recorded to get that snazzy fade-out to work in editing, and then the video was completely over. TwoMuchGrian retracted their camera back into their robotic little body.
“Well, I think that was a good episode!” Grian stated to no one in particular, since the Camerabots can’t actually talk. He took off the small spy microphone in his shirt used to get a clearer voice in the videos and handed it to TwoMuch. These Camerabots Mumbo invented a while back sure made things easier, Grian couldn’t imagine what it was like before they existed. TwoMuch did a little happy dance around Grian as he went back to his base. Of course they’re cute as heck, what self-respecting robot designer wouldn’t make their robots cute?
Grian entered his mansion, and TwoMuch went to his little recharging cubby. The red-shirted builder wondered what sort of dreams the Camerabots have before his communicator rumbled.
<Etho> hey wels can I talk to you?
Oh, it’s not even for me, Grian thought as he shoved the communicator back into his pocket. He doesn’t even know why he checked, if the message was about him the communicator would have made a pinging noise.
Grian walked over to one of the many chests strewn around. Inside that chest was various blocks, a Grian head, exactly 47 bamboo in two separate stacks for some reason, and a crafting table that has been renamed to “key to the city” (Quotation marks included). Grian grabbed the crafting table and also 12 of the bamboo (5 from one stack and 7 from the other), for good luck of course, and flew off in a northwest direction.
Four more rockets propelled Grian past Zedaph’s mountain, and about a hundred blocks from the ocean Grian finally landed. A spruce shack lay there, surrounded only by nature. Grian entered the shack. It was quite small, with the only light being a torch in the middle of the floor. There was only one chest in the back. Grian placed the crafting table in the chest, and a tick later the crafting table zooped away, for a hopper was under the chest. A G# note played from a hidden noteblock and a second later a corner opened up, revealing a large chute with water near the bottom. Grian clutched his luck bamboo and jumped into the hole, and didn’t die. The luck bamboo working wonders as always.
The hole lead to a large underground cavern, much more decorated than the shack it’s connected to. Stalactites lined the ceiling and crystals sprung out of the walls. The ground dipped down further to the back of the cavern, leaving only water to fill the dip. There was shrubbery dotted around the lake, along with other plant life and mushrooms. Lanterns were hung everywhere to light up the pristine grotto. But all that decoration didn’t compare to the GIANT TAURTIS STATUE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE LAKE.
“You’re still safe,” Grian uttered. “You need to stop standing in that lake, you’ll get all waterlogged.” Grian placed one bamboo onto a stone circle in front of Taurtis. 5 other pieces of bamboo were there from previous visits. “Come on Taurtis, if you don’t eat your greens you won’t get dessert!”
Grian continued the check-up almost rhythmically, it’s clear he’s done this many times before. Unbeknownst to him, a Camerabot was watching, and recording with a built-in microphone, specifically used for catching scoops.
The next day, Grian was working on his mansion off-camera when his communicator made a pinging noise. This time the message definitely was for him.
<MumboJumbo> Grian, have you seen the paper?
<Grian> paper? what do you mean by paper?
<MumboJumbo> The newspaper
<Grian> oh is there a new issue?
<MumboJumbo> Well, yes. But it has to do with you
‘It has to do with me’? What does that mean? Grian thought as he flew on over to the main entrance of his mansion, the place he keeps his copy of the newspaper. As he read, Grian got more and more surprised.
Hermiton Herald Volume 8.5: G-MAN EXPOSED
We here at the Hermiton Herald have found some interesting things about local mansion-builder Grian. A shack that can be found past Zedaph’s Cave of Contraptions is holding a secret Grian will have kept to his grave if the Herald wasn’t so darn good at their jobs. A giant statue of what appears to be Grian’s old friend Taurtis is located in a large cavern underneath the shack. Why it’s there is still unknown, but it has to be important. We will try to get an exclusive interview with Grian himself for the next volume. In other news…
Whatever the other news was didn’t matter, Grian had been found out! Grian pulled out his communicator again and saw that Cub was online.
<Grian> Cub!!!!
<cubfan135> what’s up grian?
<Grian> can i talk to you for a bit
<cubfan135> thought you’d never ask!
<cubfan135> meet up at the hermiton herald
“So, Grian,” Cub started the conversation. “We here at the Herald would like to know why this Taurtis statue was built.”
“And I would like to know how you found out,” Grian pressed.
“Fine fine, I guess I should explain that,” Cub gave into Grian’s demands. “We got an anonymous tip to follow you for more information.”
“Why me specifically?” Grian asked.
“Well not just you,” Cub replied. “We have anonymous tips for other hermits too. To be honest we would have followed you around anyways just to get the juicy news outta ya.”
“That’s very shady,” Grian grumbled.
“Well I think a giant Taurtis statue is shadier,” Cub refuted. “So now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s hear why you built that Taurtis statue.” Cub got out a book and quill to start writing away notes.
“Why do you keep insisting Taurtis is a statue? That’s not very nice.”
“What do you want me to call it? An effigy?”
“I want you to call Taurtis by his name,” Grian glared at Cub like this was a very serious issue. The fact that Grian doesn’t even have a mouth makes his glares all the worse.
“Okay then… so why is… Taurtis in a cavern underneath a shack?” Cub made a few notes to never call Taurtis a statue again when Grian’s around.
“So that nobody would find him, duh!” Grian kept answering these questions as if Cub were a 6-year-old asking the most obvious questions.
“I meant secondary reasons.”
“Secondary reasons?”
“Like for ritualistic purposes.” Seeing the confusion in Grian’s eyes, Cub put down the quill. “You mean to tell me this isn’t a pseudo-religion?”
“What? No! Nobody would worship Taurtis.” Suddenly Grian bowed his head. “Sorry, that was a bit mean to him.”
A full 10 seconds of silence filled the room. Cub couldn’t ask any more questions; he was just too confused as to why Grian would even have such a thing hidden.
“Just… try to forget the shack even exists,” Grian waved goodbye to Cub and left the Herald building.
Grian was about to stuff the crafting table into the chest when he heard someone calling out to him. When he turned around, Cub was there. Annoyed, Grian turned around again.
“I thought I told you to forget about it.”
“No, you misunderstand,” Cub insisted. “I came here to help with the… Taurtis upkeep.”
“Oh?” Grian thought it over to himself, his mutterings incomprehensible to anyone but himself. “Well two people helping is better than one.” A G# note played, and the corner opened up. “After you, Cub.”
Cub jumped down the hole and…
cubfan135 fell from a high place.
<GoodTimeWithScar> Oh no
“What the,” Grian could still hear Cub because of the communicators. “Why did I die?”
“You need to hold the luck bamboo, Cub!” Grian managed to get out between spurts of laughter.
“You never told me about that!” Cub let out an exasperated sigh that was just barely heard through the communicator.