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“What do you want, B’Elanna? Please tell me because I have tried everything, but nothing I do is right anymore!” Tom was at the end of his rope. They’d been fighting constantly. He didn’t want to lose B’Elanna, but it wasn’t working anymore.
“I don't know what I want, but I know it's not you!” B’Elanna hissed.
They both did a double take. Tom’s face grew sad.
“Talk to me,” he pleaded.
B’Elanna sat heavily on his couch. “I’m sorry. I- I didn’t mean it like that.”
“What did you mean, then?”
She looked up at him. “We’ve run our course, Tom. I need something different, but I have no idea what it is.” Tears welled in her eyes.
He sat down next to her and wrapped his arms around her. “It’s okay. I understand. I just wish you would have told me sooner.”
They sat like that for a while before she pulled back. She looked worried. “Am I being dramatic? Are we as bad as I'm imagining?” she asked. Her brow furrowed and Tom knew she needed a real answer, one from the heart.
“No, you’re not being dramatic. You’re listening to your emotions. It’s what you’re best at.”
She scoffed and shook her head.
“B’Elanna, look at me. You are doing the right thing. We are doing the right thing. We got together because of a lot of outside sources. No one can say we didn’t try, but we’re too similar. We haven’t fit in a long time. Let us go and find what you’re looking for. I could give you my two cents, but you’d bite my head off.” His lip curled up in a semblance of a smile.
“And what does that mean?”
Tom put a few inches of space between them. “It means… Look at the people around you. Really look at them. You’ll find some answers.”
She stared at him, trying to puzzle out his expression, but he stayed stone faced. She scoffed and turned to busy herself with something on her desk.
Tom nodded, pat his palms on his lap, and stood to leave.
As he reached the door, B’Elanna whispered, “Thanks…”
“You’re welcome, B’Elanna.”
The first few days after their break-up, B’Elanna was fine. But soon Tom’s words needled her more. Who had he been talking about? Once the wheels started turning, she couldn’t stop them. So she did as he suggested. Making a list of everyone she worked with, B'Elanna built a meticulous schedule to study each in depth.
She started with Vorik. It was true they had had a brief connection, but by the end of the day her suspicions were confirmed. It wasn't him. He was far too… Vulcan for her. Not that she minded Vulcans, but he was smug about it. He was good engineer, but his personality left her cringing most of the time.
She studied Harry after that. It was a long shot, she knew, but she had to try. That was another hard no. He was her best friend, but it was nothing more. Of course he noticed her scrutiny right away.
“B’Elanna, you alright?
She’d been eyeing him up, and he pulled her out of her thoughts. “Huh? Oh, yeah Harry. Sorry. I’ve been…”
“Distracted?”
“Yeah.” she sighed. She’d racked her brain for any clue as to what Tom had meant and come out more frustrated than before.
Harry paused for a moment then said, “You know, Tom told me what happened, and what he said to you. I guess he thought you’d listen to me before you listened to him.”
B’Elanna nodded. “Go ahead. I know you’re going to no matter what I say.”
Harry cleared his throat. “Well, um, how do I say this?”
“Spit it out, Harry.”
“Okay, this isn’t just me- a lot of people have noticed- you seem to be…” He paused. “You’re gonna kill me. I just know it!”
“Harry!”
“You seem to be spending a lot more time with Seven!” Harry huffed out.
B’Elanna gaped at him. “Seven?”
Harry nodded, not making eye contact.
“That’s- That’s… How do I respond to that, Harry?”
“I don’t know, but do you see where I’m going with this.”
“Of course I do. But Seven?”
Harry shrugged and focused on his console. He wasn’t going to give her any more help. He’d done what Tom had asked. She needed to figure the rest out on her own.
They were both silent for the rest of the shift.
B’Elanna collapsed on her bed. She’d dedicated the past hour to puzzling out her feelings for Seven. It was true they’d fought constantly when Seven arrived, but they were better now. B’Elanna was in Astrometrics as much as Engineering nowadays. It was a second home. But she didn’t remember when it had become one. Thinking it over now, she realized it was her little escape. A place where she and Seven to be alone, uninterrupted. They’d even put up holograms of their favorite stars, planets, and nebulas all over the room. They had their own chairs in there for, heaven's sake. There was a rapport, and B’Elanna found herself smiling far more often in Seven’s company than anyone else’s.
Warmth spread in her stomach. This was new. How had she not noticed these feelings? Usually her emotions simmered on the surface, but these had hidden. As if she herself had tucked them away.
And was she even ready to tell Seven? She’d grown up in a small colony. There hadn’t been a lot of diversity in terms of relationships. Would this one crash and burn, ruining her relationship with Seven permanently? Would Seven even reciprocate her feelings? It was a lot to think about at two in the morning.
B’Elanna tossed and turned for the rest of the night. Eventually, she slipped into a half sleep, but it was filled with worry. Feelings.
Her alarm startled her as she hauled herself out of bed.
“Klingons were not meant for this much emotional awareness,” she complained as she threw on her uniform. She only had half a day in Engineering and intended to make the most of her free time.
Time slowed each time she glanced at the clock, but she was busy enough to stay distracted. She and half the ship were trying to determine whether a nearby nebula was safe. This one was being stubborn. It was hard to scan and harder to test. B'Elanna wasn't worried, though. She knew Seven would figure it out.
When 1200 hit, she snuck out to grab a quick lunch then hurried to Astrometrics. There would be far more answers there.
“Lieutenant Torres? I was not expecting to see you today.”
Was it B’Elanna’s imagination or had Seven blushed when she’d walked in?
“I took some time off from Engineering. I wanted to help you with that nebular coding. I know we’re all having trouble with it.”
“It is appreciated.”
They worked in silence for a long time, both typing furiously at their consoles. The scanner had picked up this nebula weeks ago, but the Captain wanted a full report before going near it. There were huge energy readings that would be helpful as long as they wouldn’t destroy the ship.
“Do your sensors show any change?” Seven’s voice cut through the quiet as B’Elanna’s code chimed.
B’Elanna glanced at her monitor. Nothing. Just like the past ten combinations they’d tried.
“No.” B’Elanna replied curtly. The silence had gotten to her, and she’d lost her nerve. This, in turn, annoyed her, and she wasn’t able to school her tone.
“Have I done something to offend you, Lieutenant?”
“No.”
“Did someone else offend you?”
“No! Seven, why are you drilling me?
Seven’s cheeks turned a light pink. “It is simply that I thought we were getting along more easily in the past few weeks, but tonight you seem angry with me.”
B’Elanna sighed. “I’m not angry with you, Seven. I’m tired and frustrated. Our power is low, this nebula is a dead end, and my room is… empty.” That last part slipped out on it’s own.
“This is about Lieutenant Paris?” Seven quirked an eyebrow.
B’Elanna’s face reddened. “No, I- it’s- Oh, I don’t know!” She slammed her fist on the control. A few symbols appeared, but she ignored them.
“I’m just lonely right now!” Her voice cracked, and her head shot up to see if Seven had noticed.
She had. Seven tilted her head. Her gaze made B’Elanna feel as though she were being scanned.
“I am sorry you feel that way. Would… would talking about it make you feel better?” Seven’s voice was stilted, as if she had practiced the words but never actually said them to someone else.
B’Elanna fought the urge to roll her eyes again. Talking. It always had to be talking. She couldn’t just punch something.
“No. Thank you, but no.”
“Alright.”
B’Elanna kicked herself immediately. The whole point of coming down here was to talk to Seven. She found herself fighting back words. They kept popping into her head and she couldn’t ignore them.
“I wanted it to work,” She whispered and absentmindedly typed a few more lines of code.
Seven glanced at her, but said nothing. Better to let B’Elanna talk in her own time.
“I wanted it to work because it was safe. But I can’t help feeling that a part of me pushed it to end.”
That was new. Seven couldn’t help asking, “Why?”
B’Elanna started. “I don’t know.”
Seven’s face fell a bit. The Doctor had made her study human courting behavior. Over the last few weeks B'Elanna had displayed several signs of attraction in front of Seven. She'd even caught herself with a very human blush on occasion. B’Elanna was pretty. She was fire most days, but sometimes she cooled enough that Seven could get close. They’d worked together more often in the past months and, though Seven never intended to get caught up in the rampant romance of the ship, she found herself with a true crush on the Lieutenant.
B’Elanna took a breath. “That’s a lie. I do know.” She paused as if trying to slot the words together in the right pattern. Her finger drummed idly at the monitor, and more lines appeared.
“I was scared I would get trapped. Not in a bad way, just a complacent way. Tom, he was the first person in a long time to see past the Klingon. But we’re not right. I pushed away before I could get stuck and both of us were hurt.”
Seven played with a bit of her hand implant. Nerves were still new, and she could tell they were getting the better of her. She took a breath and decided to go for it. “Would you feel stuck with me?”
B’Elanna gazed at her. “How did you-”
“Intuition. The Captain taught me about it.” She took a few steps toward B’Elanna.
The lieutenant stood and pressed against her keyboard. Another string of symbols appeared.
Seven closed the distance, and B’Elanna let her take her hand. They slotted together perfectly.
B’Elanna gasped. “It is you.”
Seven’s face turned into a question, but B’Elanna held up her free hand. “Don’t ask me what that means right now…”
The glow of the maps lit Seven’s face with soft starlight. Her hair had become mussed from running her hand through it over the course of the evening. It was gorgeous. As B’Elanna studied Seven, she felt everything shift into place.
“Seven, would you kiss me?”
Seven’s eyes lit up and she brought her hand to B’Elanna’s cheek. “Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
B’Elanna closed the gap between them. Their lips met and B’Elanna saw stars. It was powerful and calm all at the same time. But Seven retreated after a moment.
“Something wrong?” concern colored B’Elanna’s voice. What if it was just her? Did Seven not feel the same? She didn’t want to lose whatever this was, but she would respect it if she had to.
“No, I- I am not used to that sort of… stimulation. I must adjust.”
B’Elanna blushed and smiled. Her hand drifted again to the keyboard. She tapped a rhythm, and suddenly alarms blared all around them.
“What did you do?” Seven looked up, startled.
“Nothing! I've been putting random codes in all evening. I guess one took. Whatever noise this thing is making is good.”
“Good sirens?”
“Something went right. We've got a sample.” B’Elanna slid back into lieutenant mode instantly. “Will you hand me that gauge, Seven.”
Seven switched back just as easily, and the two went to work. They moved in sync, anticipating the other’s ideas before either could think. It got late, but they finally found the energy component.
“B’Elanna to Janeway.” She tapped her comm excitedly.
“B’Elanna?” The Captain’s voice was sleepy. B’Elanna winced. She’d forgotten the time.
“Sorry, Captain, I’ve got good news. The nebula is not only safe, but if we open Voyager’s outer vents, we’ll get a power surge that’ll hold us for at least 1,000 light years.
Janeway sighed. “That’s fantastic, B’Elanna, but can the rest wait till morning?”
“Of course, Captain. Sorry to wake you.” B’Elanna smiled and hung up.
She glanced at Seven, taking in her companion’s appearance. Her eyes were bright with excitement, but light shadows had developed underneath them. She needed to regenerate and B’Elanna needed sleep, but something kept her from suggesting that. B’Elanna motioned for Seven to come closer. The lieutenant brushed her finger’s against Seven’s face as she moved the hair behind her ear. Seven leaned into the touch. That was all the prompting B’Elanna needed. Their lips met once more. It was hesitant at first, but the stress and elation of the past few hours moved them into a steady rhythm.
Seven ran her hand through B’Elanna’s hair. It was softer than she’d guessed it would be. The movement pulled a gasp from B’Elanna. Seven smiled and pulled back to look at the other woman.
B’Elanna smiled back, looking dazed and happy.
“That is the first smile I’ve seen from you in weeks,” Seven observed. “May I take that as a compliment.”
B’Elanna huffed a laugh. “You may.”
Seven grinned and drew B'Elanna close again. "Is it natural for my heart to feel this way?"
B'Elanna shivered as Seven's breath warmed her lips. "Completely."
"Good. It is not a sensation I want to lose."
They collided together again. This time letting passion take over for awhile. Seven tasted sweet, and B'Elanna found it difficult to pull away. She made herself only because she knew there was something they had to do before they went further.
“Do you want to grab some food? We should talk, and it’s always so much easier over a meal. Even if it is leola root stew.”
Seven seemed disappointed for a moment, but soon agreed. “Nourishment would be appreciated.”
They moved to B’Elanna’s room, talking into the morning. Discussing what they were and everything that would go along with it. Seven had questions that B’Elanna answered as best she could. Her romance had always been fast and hot, but she understood that Seven would need more time. She could deal with that. The feeling that had budded in her stomach was worth patience. Eventually, neither could stay awake. Seven moved to leave.
“Wait. If you want, you can stay here tonight.”
Seven gave her a skeptical look.
“Not like that. We can get the sense of how the other sleeps. If you don’t like it, you can go back to the alcove.”
“It would be more efficient to learn about sleep cycles early into this.” Seven hummed.
She slid under the covers and nestled into the pillow. B’Elanna smiled and let herself relax.
When Seven awoke with B’Elanna’s arm slung over her, she grinned. This was far more comfortable than any alcove.