Chapter Text
In Hinata’s opinion, he and Kageyama had come a long way. He remembered their first meeting with startling clarity. The day of Hinata’s first and last match in middle school; his nerves rising in his throat, his excitement thrumming in his veins, and a boy with piercing, midnight blue eyes on the opposite side of the court. The day he made the King of the Court his rival.
He remembered the training he endured after that, countless winter days spent running through half-frozen fields outside his home till his breath was nothing but hitched pants, and more spent practicing with the girls’ volleyball team. And then racing into Karasuno’s gym… only to see Kageyama there.
He remembered the rocky start of their partnership and the pieces that fell in place when Hinata closed his eyes, a volleyball stung his hand, and they scored faster than anyone thought possible. And from there, he remembered bickering and arguments, but clicking so well too. The beginning of joining each other for lunch and racing to the gym and studying for their classes together.
He remembered endless hours practicing with Kageyama till the moon hung high in the star-dotted sky. The encouragement he would give him when he didn’t know his place on the team, albeit in his own special way. The easiness and comfort he felt. The understanding he knew lied between them.
He remembered learning to fly and feeling invincible and all the other feelings he had come to associate with Kageyama Tobio.
Hinata cherished what they had with one another -- this togetherness.
“How long do you want to work on this?” Hinata asked, picking the volleyball back off the ground. They were shadowed under the blossoming black pine trees in Karasuno’s courtyard, where they would spend most of their time practicing after scarfing down their lunches. It was warm that day, the sun half-hidden as it strolled behind white clouds, though Hinata knew it would only get colder from here. He tossed the ball back to the setter.
Kageyama shrugged. “Until you don’t suck at receiving.” He caught the ball effortlessly, motioning for Hinata to get back in receiving position.
Hinata perked up before following Kageyama’s gesture and replying, “You think that could happen in an afternoon?”
“No.”
He pouted, but to be honest, he got the answer he was expecting. They went back and forth for a bit, falling into the same routine Hinata was growing accustomed to. Kageyama hit the ball a little higher than before, but it was enough to throw Hinata off balance.
The ball hit Hinata’s forearms, leaving a stinging sensation that was fading day by day; it ricocheted off at an odd angle, lodging itself in a tree again. “So how long do we have to do this?” Hinata asked, already moving to climb the black pine. And how much longer was their lunch break anyway?
Kageyama crossed his arms. “Just keep working on it,” he responded. His voice was low and edged with exasperation.
Hinata climbed up to a branch near the middle of the tree, leaning his weight against the base and throwing his leg over the branch to get a good grip on the volleyball. “You better set for me after this!” Hinata yelled as he throwed the ball back down to Kageyama. He fell less than gracefully back to the ground.
“We’ll see, dumbass.” Kageyama spun the ball in his hand and moved to toss the ball to Hinata again.
Wait- that wasn’t a no. Hinata wasn’t expecting that sort of answer -- he could work with that.
“Are you actually agreeing?” Hinata’s voice was high with wonder and excitement. He could feel his cheeks heated with anticipation and the bounce in his step returning with full force.
Kageyama’s eyes narrowed, and after a moment, softened as he took in Hinata’s expression. And suddenly, the glance disappeared before Hinata could even consider it. “I never said that,” Kageyama said as they begin to go back and forth with the ball some more.
They returned to the same routine as before and maybe it’s the elation of a promised set, but Hinata could tell he’s receiving better than before. The ball hit his arms and returned to Kageyama.
“Not bad,” the setter called, which was probably the highest form of compliment Hinata could receive from a guy like Kageyama.
The bell rang.
Kageyama tossed the ball one last time, one last good moment before having to return to English. Out of the corner of his eye, Hinata saw it coming and instinct flared within him; and then, before the ball reached him, he reigned it in and fixed himself in the position Sugawara, Nishinoya, and Kageyama had spent hours teaching him. That same sting coursed through his forearms and the ball returned directly towards Kageyama. A perfect receive.
Kageyama gave him a look before turning to pick up the ball and walking back to the gym to put it away. It’s a scowl that Hinata once would’ve mistaken for displeasure, but now he knows is more considering than anything else. Hinata’s face lit up a little. He turned to follow Kageyama when he heard footsteps approaching him.
“Hello, Shouyou!” A voice called out to him; it sounded high-pitched, coy and sweet in his ear. Hinata vaguely recognized the girl before him. They shared a class together and would sometimes pass each other in the hallways and he was pretty sure she was on the basketball team. He remembered her being nothing but kind hearted to him.
Hinata grinned, waving at her as she moved to stand in front of him. Haruna, his brain recalled. “Hey, I haven’t seen you in a while! How are you?”
Her smile was playful and a little bit shy. “Besides that English exam, I’ve been doing great.” Her laugh stuttered as it passed through her lips. All Hinata could focus on was the cold chill that went down his spine at the mention of that dreaded exam. “But- actually there’s been something I’ve been meaning to ask you…”
Hinata, slightly confused, nodded for her to continue.
“I was just wondering… do you know Kageyama?” Haruna asked, a blush adorning her cheeks.
Hinata, even more confused, blinked, ruffling his hair before answering. “Yeah! We’re both on the volleyball team together.” And we’re best friends, Hinata thought, feeling heat brush across his own face. Hopefully, his wasn’t as noticeable.
“Yes, I’ve seen you guys practicing a lot together before. You seem to spend a lot of time together.”
“Do you like volleyball? Kageyama and I spend a lot of time practicing this quick attack that’s really fast and swoosh and bam. He helps with my receiving sometimes too -- even though he’s grumpy about it. We have a lot we need to work on before the preliminaries!”
Haruna’s blush deepend. “You could say I like it. I like watching it at least. But I wanted to ask, since you two are teammates, do you know if he’s dating anyone?”
Oddly enough, this wasn’t the first time Hinata had been asked this question -- nowhere close, in fact. One wouldn’t think it at first, Hinata certainly didn’t, but Kageyama was actually a popular guy. Students would swoon over his good looks and admire his fierce talent towards volleyball. He had heard the whispers that followed them when they walked together in the hallways of Karasuno.
People looked at Kageyama and saw attractive intimidation and a cold mystery to unravel. They didn’t even know Kageyama like he did. They didn’t know how competitive he would get at small races to the gym, or how happy he’d be when someone handed him a packet of milk. The excitement at a scored point, the confusion at a high five, the awe when Hinata jumped.
Something unfurled painfully in Hinata’s chest.
“Uh, no, Kageyama’s not dating anyone,” Hinata brought himself to say eventually.
Hinata looked at Haruna -- really looked. Her chestnut brown hair was long and silky, cascading down her back and framing her delicate features. And her eyes were a bright blue, lighter than Kageyama’s and almost as mesmerizing. She was tall and had a bit of muscle to her and-
Her and Kageyama would probably be perfect for each other.
“Oh, good! Wish me luck?” Haruna asked sweetly.
And even as bitterness rose in Hinata’s throat, he grinned back at her, nothing but sincerity in his voice. “Good luck!”
Haruna was friendly and beautiful and sweet, and Hinata was sure that if Kageyama were to date someone, it would be someone like her. And who was he to deny Kageyama that? As much as it hurt, he was Kageyama’s best friend before anything else. He wanted to see him happy. Maybe Haruna was that happiness.
He watched her run in the same direction Kageyama went, her bag swaying with each hurried step. Hinata turned and began walking towards the main building; he’d just meet Kageyama in class. He ignored how heavy each step he took felt.
And when Kageyama walked into class five minutes late, he didn’t look particularly happy. He didn’t look sad either -- or anything really. He still had the same blank frown on his face. For the rest of their classes, Kageyama never brought up getting a girlfriend.
Hinata only saw Haruna later that day, when their teacher had asked Kageyama to stay after class, and he’s alone waiting outside in the hallway. She had a look in her eyes that Hinata didn’t even know how to begin to decipher.
“Why did you let me ask him out?” Haruna asked before Hinata could even greet her, before he could even ask how her conversation with Kageyama went. Her cheeks were puffy and eyes were bloodshot, like she had spent her time crying till her tears ran out.
Hinata’s words caught in his throat. “I- what’s wrong? Did something happen?”
“Kageyama has a boyfriend,” she muttered, bitterness lacing her voice as she glared down at him. Everything went quiet after that. The soft tick of the clock, Hinata’s heart pounding in his chest, Haruna’s choked breathing.
Kageyama- Kageyama had a boyfriend.
Kageyama had a boyfriend.
Hinata felt something drop in the pit of his stomach. Kageyama had a boyfriend and he didn’t even tell him. They spent so much time together, had gotten so close with one another. Hinata looked down, swallowing dryly. They were certainly rivals and partners, he thought they were friends too -- best friends. Maybe Kageyama didn’t see him like that; maybe he was nothing more than an annoyance to the setter. For all the time they spent together, Hinata realized slowly, they never talked about crushes and love and relationships and most things not having to do with volleyball.
The girl was gone by the time Hinata looked up. When did Kageyama even get a boyfriend? How had Hinata not realized this?
Was Kageyama ever planning on telling him?
He came out of the classroom a few moments later wearing an actually soft smile -- not the scary, angry one -- that Hinata was only beginning to grow used to. “You ready?” Kageyama asked, nodding for Hinata to follow him to afternoon practice.
Hinata couldn’t do this- how was he supposed to do this?
“Um, actually I-I... need to go fill out my water bottle,” Hinata stuttered out in one breath. He turned abruptly, ready to rush out of the hallway.
He caught Kageyama’s lips turning down, his eyebrows drawn in bewilderment. “Wait! Dumbass-”
“I’ll meet you at the gym!” He yelled back before finally running around the corner and out of sight. He quickly looked back to make sure Kageyama wasn’t chasing after him. Leaning his head against the cool tiles of the bathroom, Hinata sighed when he realized he was safe. He really did need to fill up his water bottle -- though Kiyoko or Yachi probably could’ve done that for him.
Hinata’s thoughts were racing as he put the bottle underneath the tap of the sink.
Okay, Kageyama had a boyfriend.
Should he ask?
No- no. That was a terrible idea. It was obviously apparent that Kageyama didn’t want him to know. They had come so far, and as much as he teased the other, Hinata didn’t want to make Kageyama uncomfortable. If Kageyama were to tell him, he would tell him in his own time.
Hinata tried not to think about how much it hurt. The hurt of his best friend, his unrequited crush, hiding this from him, still not feeling comfortable enough to tell him after all these months of growing together. But as infuriating as the setter was, he was actually a good person; a person that Hinata cared about more than his own selfish wishes.
Quietly, Hinata said goodbye to a relationship he knew had no chance of happening.
Yeah, okay. Hinata could do this.
And slowly, a string began to unravel.
Cold water was overflowing out of the bottle and through his fingers by the time Hinata brought himself out of his thoughts. Hopefully, too much time hadn’t passed. He really didn’t need Kageyama or anyone else going to search for him -- friend or foe. Hinata realized that he was in a bathroom: the most dangerous place.
Hinata secured the lid back onto his water bottle and closed the bathroom door behind him. He just had to act like nothing was different -- like nothing was wrong. Like everything hadn’t been completely turned on its head. Yeah, he could totally do this.
Definitely.
Hinata really did cherish what they had. Kageyama and Hinata. The Freak Duo. Number Nine and Ten. Their togetherness. He put on the same smile he was wearing before, when the two of them were in the courtyard passing around a beat up volleyball, the soles of their shoes covered in dirt and sunlight scattered on their faces.
The trees and railings of the walkway blurred into each other as he made his way to afternoon practice. “Kageyama,” Hinata called as he stepped through the gym, “you promised to set for me!”