Chapter Text
Betty frowned as she looked down at the gold wedding band on her finger. It's a ring she's been wearing for almost a year now and it still feels so foreign on her hand.
Foreign and like it doesn't belong. It's too perfect and god knows Betty isn't perfect no matter what kind of image she liked to put out to the world.
She's not perfect and her wedding ring feels foreign.
"You aren't really going to his book signing are you?" Alice asked bringing Betty out of her thoughts and she looked at her mother then seeing a look of disdain on her mother's face.
Of course Alice Cooper wouldn't want her to go. Alice still wanted Betty to keep up the perfect image. She wanted Betty to have what she and Hal could never have, which is the perfect life. Two kids and a white picket fence.
Betty used to want that too. Still does but maybe not with the man she married. She fears sometimes that she made a huge mistake when she married Archie Andrews but life is what it is.
Archie was there for her after she lost Jughead. Archie was the only one she kept in contact with. After all Betty guessed it made sense. She had betrayed Veronica and Jughead with that damn kiss she'd shared with Archie and if she were them she wouldn't really want to speak to herself either.
"Of course I'm going mom," Betty shrugged as if it was nothing. "It would only be polite of me," she said knowing there were other reasons she wanted to go.
She wanted to see the boy who she hadn't seen in seven years. She wanted to see the boy who she sometimes felt was the one who got away.
"Does Archie know you're planning to go to Jughead's book signing?" Alice questioned her and Betty knew her mother was hitting hard with that question.
The fallout from the kiss had wrecked Archie and Jughead's friendship. Neither of them had spoken since Betty told Jughead and now it was like Archie was bitter when it came to Jughead. Something that was unwarranted since Archie wasn't the one who had gotten hurt by the kiss.
"No," Betty answered with a shake of her head. "I don't think he even knows Jug's back in town," she said honestly, almost hating how easy it was to revert to using Jughead's nickname.
It wasn't like she'd said it much in the seven years they'd been apart. She tried her best not to say Jughead's name around Archie or even at all really. It was still sometimes too painful for her.
"I don't see how he doesn't know," Alice said with a roll of her eyes. "He drives by the bookstore where it's going to be held at every day when he leaves for work and when he comes back. They've had a promo poster for the last week saying that Jughead will be there."
"You know Archie, mom," Betty told her as if just saying that was simple enough. "He only sees what he wants to see."
"Sometimes I could say the same about you Elizabeth," Alice replied back like she was judging Betty and that was nothing new. Her mom always seemed to judge her.
It was something that would never change no matter how much time had passed.
"And what does that mean mom?"
Alice heaved a small sigh as she narrowed her eyes at Betty, "It means you have the perfect marriage Elizabeth," she started and Betty hated that her mother was now using her full name. "You have a husband who loves you and no matter how Archie is, you know he loves you," she said and her words made Betty blush because they were true.
No matter how unhappy she was in this marriage Archie did love her. He loved her more than she deserved sometimes which only went to show that she was not perfect nor was she that good.
She was unhappy when she had it all. She had what some would consider the perfect life.
"Maybe he isn't who you wanted to marry," Alice continued her voice pointed. "But you have him. You have him and he's here and nice and he can give you everything you wanted."
Betty nodded her head acknowledging what her mom said. "He can," she said because it was the truth. "I'm just not sure I want everything he can give me. I'm not sure I want this life with him."
"And you want it with Jughead?" Alice asked as if that was the worst thing in the world. "You know he's an alcoholic now right?" she asked and yes, Betty knew that.
She's heard about his drinking problem through the grapevine. Though she did wonder how her mom knew. There was no way she'd found out from FP.
FP and Alice had ended not long after she and Jughead. The distance had done them in. That and Gladys. FP had decided to try again with her and Betty knew that had killed her mother. She'd lost the one man who could give her what Hal never could. She'd lost the man she would have given up an almost picture perfect life for and now it seemed she didn't want Betty to give up that picture perfect life for that man's son.
"Yes I know that mother," Betty retorted feeling a bit fed up now. "I know that and I know I may not get what I have with Archie from him but at least I'd be happy. At least I'd know I was happy and I'd know I'd have the life I always wanted," she frowned because in the end the life she had always wanted was just being with Jughead.
She'd wanted Jug and she still wanted him.
Alice only shook her head at Betty's words and Betty knew her mother was disappointed and she knew this conversation was over. They'd never see eye to eye about this.
In the end it wouldn't change anything. She still planned to go to the book signing tomorrow even if she was scared about seeing Jughead after all these years.
Even with the unresolved anger and hurt between them. Stuff she knew they'd have to get out and fix at some point but for now she just wanted to see him again.
She just wanted to see that face that haunted her dreams as well as her reality and she wanted to hear his voice. Hear him call her Betts again.
Though maybe that'd be too intimate for where they were right now. With them being practically strangers to one another.
***
Sitting on the couch in her study long after Archie had gone to bed, Betty just looked at the dedication page of Jughead's book. His only book so far. Though even if it was his only it had been a bestseller.
How could it not be? Everyone seemed to love mysteries. Betty herself loved them.
She'd always been drawn to Nancy Drew. Dreamed of being her one day and she guessed in a way that was why she'd liked being with Jughead so much. She got to experience that life with all the mysteries they investigated.
Now she had a heroine in a book based on her, since of course, Jug had based his story on true events. The death of Jason Blossom and the search for Betty's own sister Polly Cooper.
She also had a book dedicated to her. Though Jughead had been subtle. He'd only dedicated it to B. B who had given him the best kind of inspiration.
It was nice to see something like that in writing, especially from Jughead, who she'd hurt in so many ways.
"Betty?"
Startling some Betty blushed as she looked up at Archie standing in the doorway of the study. A sleepy look on his face and in his own way he did look attractive. She'd always thought that, it was one reason she'd always been drawn to him.
"Yeah?" Betty asked as she just looked at her husband, closing the book in her hand so fast because she was afraid Archie would see the dedication page.
If he saw it then he'd know it was about her and she was afraid if he knew he'd make her get rid of the book. He hadn't been happy when she bought it. The night he'd found it on the table in her study had been one of the worst fights they'd had and that had taken place during their engagement.
"Are you coming to bed anytime soon?" Archie asked and after he asked the question, Betty watched as his eyes landed on the book in her hand. Betty watching as a slight frown appeared on his face though it was gone just as quick as it came.
It seemed her husband was as good at pretending things were fine in this marriage too. Like they weren't both haunted by the ghost of the boy she still loved.
"Yeah," Betty nodded her head as she stood from the couch. "I'll be right up," she said as she gave him a smile to appease him. She'd do anything to avoid an argument or talking.
She just wanted to get through tonight and tomorrow morning. She was counting down the hours in her head until the book signing tomorrow afternoon.
She could do this. She knew she could.
Archie gave her a nod though he lingered in the doorway which made Betty raise her eyebrow. She was asking him an unspoken question, wondering what he wanted.
"Are you going to his book signing tomorrow?" Archie asked, finally seeming to realize she was waiting on him to speak. To tell her whatever was on his mind so they could both head upstairs to bed.
Though his question surprised her because she had indeed believed that he hadn't known. That he somehow just ignored those posters on the bookstore window as he drove too and from work.
"No," Betty lied as she shook her head, not even sure if she really hated herself for this lie. "Jug's...he's in my past Arch," she lied again and as she lied she hoped nothing betrayed her.
The last thing she wanted was something to give her away. She didn't want to be found out.