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He’s been carrying around the ring in his back pocket for the last six months and he’s somehow managed to never lose track of it, not even when he’s thrown his clothes in the laundry. It’s pretty impressive, and if it weren’t for the fact that Feng Xin doesn’t know when he should propose (and if his boyfriend didn’t make it so difficult for him not to propose literally every second of the day by existing) he would simply stop taking it everywhere.
But alas, these are the facts, so Feng Xin makes sure to have the ring on him at all times just in case.
So of course it hits him when they’re in their apartment and he could’ve just gone to the other room to retrieve it. But, as he’s listening to Mu Qing bitch about some annoying coworker, he thanks his past self for planning ahead because it would be awkward for him to leave in the middle of their conversation just to get the ring.
Feng Xin isn’t sure why this moment. Maybe it’s the way the daylight illuminates Mu Qing’s face. Maybe it’s the fiery look in his eye as he speaks that makes him burn brighter than the sun. Maybe it's the domesticity of it all when Mu Qing pauses his tirade to take a bite of the dumplings they made together earlier.
But then he’s sliding out of his seat and dropping down to one knee and tugging the simple yet elegant band out from his pocket and holding it out, and it’s all very sudden but it just feels right.
Mu Qing looks at him in shock and puts down his chopsticks. “A-Xin, what—”
“I love you,” Feng Xin declares before he has a chance to finish. “Mu Qing, I love you so much it hurts sometimes. It’s overwhelming. And it wasn't until you that I realized I was even capable of loving someone this much. And everything we've been through, the good, the bad—you make all of it so worth it. I treasure every moment we are together, and even the ones we’re not because I know we’ll always find our way back to each other. I’m not always the best with words, I've been trying to figure out what to say for...years, really, and nothing ever seems like it's enough. But if you give me the chance, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to show you how much I love you and maybe one day I'll find the words. I just need you to know that I want forever with you.”
Mu Qing’s breath hitches. He’s so beautiful, Feng Xin could cry.
“So,” he fumbles with the lid, hands quivering, eyes never leaving Mu Qing’s, but he eventually gets it open, “will you marry me?”
Mu Qing gapes at him, eyes big and round and mouth wide open. The golden rays shine through the window, glinting on his hair and bathing his face in a glowing warmth. Like an angel, Feng Xin thinks to himself. Mu Qing clamps his mouth shut, inhaling sharply, and then—
“Motherfucker,” his boyfriend lets out a stream of curses as he makes his way to his feet and stomps off in the direction of the bedroom. He stops very suddenly, as if remembering something, and swivels around to glare at Feng Xin who’s still on the floor. “You,” Mu Qing snaps, jabbing a shaky finger at him, “Don’t. Fucking. Move.”
Well that’s easy enough. Feng Xin doesn’t know if he could move even if he tried. He’s still holding out the ring between his fingers, frozen in bewilderment. Because Mu Qing didn’t say no (and Feng Xin had been pretty sure he wouldn’t, considering they had talked about it before and he seemed more than welcome to the idea) but he didn’t say yes either, and right now he seems...angry? Still in shock, his eyes stay glued to the door Mu Qing disappeared behind. He hears furious muttering followed by a drawer being slammed shut just before the man in question emerges, looking incredibly pissed off.
Mu Qing marches over to Feng Xin and looks him in the eye. “Fuck you,” he says with relish, and then he’s dropping down to the floor right in front of him (on one knee, Feng Xin’s mind supplies helpfully) and holding open a small box and— oh.
“That’s a ring,” he says stupidly. And would now be an inappropriate time to start laughing hysterically?
Mu Qing rolls his eyes so hard that Feng Xin would be concerned if it weren’t such a normal occurrence. “No shit. Now shut up and listen. I—” he glances down at the ring in Feng Xin’s outstretched hand and purses his lips. “Put that down, it’s my turn.” Feng Xin immediately drops his hand to rest on his knee. “Right. Feng Xin, I—no wait, get up.”
Feng Xin blinks. “What?”
“Get up! Stand, sit, whatever, but I’m not proposing when we’re both like this,” he gestures to the both of them each on one knee.
“Oh my god,” Feng Xin says faintly but pushes himself back into his seat anyway.
Mu Qing takes a deep breath before turning looking determinedly into Feng Xin’s eyes, the intensity of his gaze stealing the breath away from his lungs. “Feng Xin, I know we got off to a rough start and we weren’t always on the best terms. But you’ve always been there like this one constant in my life, and I’m so lucky to have you.”
“Mu Qing.” Feng Xin’s voice shakes and suddenly he's blinking back tears which is just embarrassing because Mu Qing has barely even said anything! In any other circumstance, his boyfriend definitely would be teasing him for getting emotional so quickly.
“No, wait let me finish,” Mu Qing stops him. “I—just let me say this? You deserve to hear it. All of it.”
Feng Xin swipes at his eyes and nods.
“Where was I?” Mu Qing frowns briefly at the box resting on his knee then straightens to look back up at him. “Oh, I’m so lucky to have you. I don’t—I don’t say it enough, but I really am lucky. That you let me love you and that you love me back.”
Feng Xin wants to tackle him to the floor, but he does have some self-restraint dammit.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way, even the stuff from back then because we grew together and learned together and I think we made each other better.” Mu Qing swallows. “Make each other better. All the best parts of me are—are from you.”
Really it’s a miracle Feng Xin hasn’t started sobbing yet.
Mu Qing continues, “I can’t imagine not standing by your side. It’s—I mean it was always going to be you. I’ve known that for a long time, and I think it’s the same for you. And I know marriage isn’t what defines a relationship, and I can’t really explain it but I just—I want this for us so much.”
Mu Qing’s eyes are watery now too. Feng Xin can’t help the tear that escapes and rolls down his cheek, but he loves this man so fucking much that it doesn’t even matter anymore.
“And I can’t believe you asked first, you just have to win at everything don’t you?” Mu Qing attempts a glare, but the effect is ruined by the moisture gathering near his lashes, by the slight quirk of his lips, by the shakiness of his breath. Feng Xin laughs wetly. He’s going to marry this man.
“But you’ve always hated when I answer a question with a question, and that’s basically what I’m doing now so maybe I do win.” Mu Qing gives him a brief smirk before melting into that soft smile Feng Xin can never get enough of. “Either way I win in the end if that means I get to call you mine. So, Feng Xin, my love, would you—”
Feng Xin leaps forward to wrap his arms around his fiancé (his fiancé!), sending them both tumbling, but he can’t find it in himself to care because his heart is full and Mu Qing is holding him close as he whispers his answer into the crook of his neck, yes, yes, yes. And it feels like coming home.
Bonus:
“Wait where are the rings?” Feng Xin asks breathlessly in the space between their mouths once his brain starts functioning again.
Mu Qing seems reluctant to let go but pulls away to raise a brow. “Well, if someone hadn’t been overeager and knocked us over…”
“You know what they say,” Feng Xin shoots him a crooked grin and takes his hands, lacing their fingers together. “Gotta hold on to what’s important to you, and I’m marrying you not the ring.”
Mu Qing gives him a flat stare. “No one says that.”
“I was trying to be sweet.”
“And anyway,” Mu Qing barrels on, “I didn’t buy that ring for you not to wear it even once.”
Feng Xin considers this. “Good point.” he concedes. He scans the surrounding area and a glint of silver standing out from the white tile catches his eye. He leans over Mu Qing to reach for it. “Hold on, here. I found yours.”
Mu Qing twists to look where Feng Xin is delicately plucking the ring off the floor. “Do you see the other one anywhere? I don’t—” he glances down at his hand. “Oh wait, it’s still in the box. Nevermind.”
“Good job, love.”
Mu Qing rolls his eyes and sits back on his heels, presenting one hand. “Shut up and just put it on me already,” he orders, but he’s smiling.
“So rude to your fiancé!” Feng Xin exclaims, holding the ring to his chest.
“Keep talking and I’m taking yours back,” Mu Qing says mildly.
“You wouldn’t.” He takes the proffered hand and slides the ring onto a slender finger.
Mu Qing sighs and squeezes Feng Xin’s hand. “No, I wouldn’t.”
Feng Xin leans into his space. “Because you loooove me,” he drawls.
He’s way too easy to rile up, and Feng Xin is only human. How could he pass up any opportunity to make his fiancé flustered? Sure enough, Mu Qing turns pink and looks down at their clasped hands. “You knew this! And it’s not like you don’t love me too, you idiot.”
“Got me there.” Feng Xin lets himself just look at the beautiful man in front of him before a thought pops into his head. “Hey, does it fit okay? Do you like it?”
Mu Qing lifts his hand to examine the ring more closely and hums. “Mm, it’s acceptable.” He eyes him. “Knowing you, it could’ve been worse.”
“That means you love it,” Feng Xin breaks out into a smug smile.
Mu Qing lifts his chin as if daring him to disagree. “I said what I said.”
“Babe...you’re literally tearing up from admiring how it looks on your hand.”
Mu Qing blinks and reaches up to wipe at his eyes, looking surprised when his finger comes back damp from the tears steadily rolling down his face. He scowls in obvious embarrassment. “What like you weren’t sobbing the entire past ten minutes?” he deflects.
“Two proposals at once! One is already stressful enough. That’s a lot to process, okay!”
Mu Qing opens his mouth to reply but shuts it as something seemingly dawns on him. “Holy shit, we’re engaged. Engaged.” He glances down at the ring then stares at Feng Xin with wide eyes, almost like he can’t quite believe it, then frowns. “I haven’t put yours on you yet! Here, give me.” He tugs his hand toward him and extracts the band from the cushiony velvet, slowly slipping it onto Feng Xin's finger, past the first knuckle, then the second. His brows furrow in concentration as he handles the ring with the utmost care as if it is the most fragile and valuable thing in the world, or maybe that's Feng Xin's heart.
Feng Xin wants to kiss him all over. “You’re adorable. I can’t believe you.” He lifts Mu Qing’s hand to press a light kiss over the ring.
“Don’t,” Mu Qing warns, flushing that lovely shade of pink again.
But Feng Xin ignores him and continues on. “Like, wow, I’m so in love with you. This is incredible. You’re incredible. I can’t believe I get to have this. I love you so much.”
Mu Qing softens by a fraction. “I love you too, but,” his eyes dart to the side, “I was kinda hoping for some celebratory engagement sex right about now.”
Feng Xin freezes, staring at Mu Qing as though seeing him for the first time. Why hadn’t he thought of that? But he recovers quickly. “Fuck, that’s a great idea.”
“Yeah.” Mu Qing gives him a knowing look and pulls him to his feet, leading him to the bedroom where they step into the future and into the newest chapter of their lives.