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Jolyne Kujo was having a difficult day.
Make no mistake, her days were easier, by and large, than they had been several months prior. She was no longer in jail, for one. She was in love, and not with the sleazy jerk who’d put her in jail in the first place. She was no longer on the run from an evil priest and his assemblage of superpowered minions bent on killing her. She had successfully saved her no-longer-estranged father’s life, along with - from what she could discern - the entire known universe.
God, her life was weird.
But today, Jolyne was anxious. She woke up uncharacteristically early (especially for a Sunday) to clean every surface in her small Miami apartment. By the time Hermès padded into the kitchen for breakfast, Jolyne had coffee and a detailed grocery list prepared.
“I think I could get used to this version of you, babe,” Hermès teased.
Jolyne scowled in (mostly) mock annoyance, passing her girlfriend a mug of hot coffee. “Don’t hold your breath. I’m still sending you out for groceries as soon as you’re dressed. Go to the nice one, please? I’ll pay.”
“Wow, you must be really trying to impress the esteemed Dr. Kujo if you’re willing to shell out the extra cash for organic salmon.”
Jolyne frowned, avoiding eye contact. “You know how he is about…” she paused. There were many ways she could complete this sentence. Ultimately, she chose the most innocuous one. “…seafood.”
Hermès laughed, but not for long, noticing Jolyne’s unchanged expression.
“Hey, babe, it’ll be ok. I promise. I know it’s been a minute, but he’s still your dad. I mean… he bailed you out of jail! It can’t be worse than that…” Jolyne wasn’t so sure, but she mustered up a smile anyway.
“I guess it can’t.” Her tone was unconvincing, but Hermès decided not to push the issue. Instead, she sipped her coffee and reviewed the grocery list in front of her. She didn’t quite understand her girlfriend’s anxiety - while Jolyne’s father was many things (difficult, intimidating, emotionally distant, stubborn, frustratingly hot), he cared for Jolyne very much. Hermès was certain. Though, she mused, he sure did have an odd way of showing it sometimes.
— — —
Hermès watched Jolyne nearly jump out of her skin when, finally, they heard a loud knock. She stood up from the couch, but Jolyne beat her to the door, taking a deep breath before opening it.
“Hi, Dad.”
Hermès was struck, once again, by how massive Dr. Jotaro Kujo was. His imposing frame was amplified by his eccentric fashion sense - Hermès had never seen him without an ostentatious brimmed hat and perfectly matching knee-length jacket. Today’s outfit was adorned with dolphin pins. What a strange family.
Jotaro cracked a brief smile and patted Jolyne awkwardly on the shoulder. “Nice to see you, Jojo. Where’s the roommate?”
Hermès flinched at her demotion. She didn’t realize Jolyne hadn’t explained the nature of their relationship to her father.
“Hi Dr. Kujo,” she said, stepping into the hallway with a small wave. He nodded at her with a soft grunt. She didn’t have time to ponder the inevitably awkward small talk, as Jolyne was already showing him to their small dining table.
Jotaro sat down, still in his hat and coat, as Jolyne scurried to the kitchen to bring the remaining bowls of food in. Hermès just stood quietly. Jotaro was a man of few words, and Hermès wasn’t one to push these things. If he was going for silence, well, so was she.
Jolyne set down several bowls from a tray, just a bit too loud. Rice and salmon and a couple different vegetables, pickled and steamed. It occurred to Hermès vaguely that Jotaro had grown up in Japan, and that perhaps the food was Jolyne’s attempt at putting him at ease.
The three sat down to eat, Jolyne’s leg nervously bouncing under the table. Hermès couldn’t help but wonder if it was just her father’s presence putting her on edge, or something more.
Hermès found herself growing nervous, between the tense silence and Jolyne’s anxiety radiating off her in waves.
“How’s the restaurant going?” Jotaro asked, after several long moments of silence.
“Fine. Hermès is a great chef, and I’ve gotten pretty good at the front-of-house thing, I guess.”
Jotaro grunted in response.
“She’s being modest, of course,” Hermès supplied. “The regulars love her. She probably gets two phone numbers a night from interested customers!” Hermès had intended this as a joke, but Jotaro didn’t look amused.
“…is that so?”
Jolyne elbowed her girlfriend. But Hermès was already nervously covering her tracks. “I mean, nothing inappropriate, of course. And we don’t let Anasui come by during work hours anymore, he was scaring people away…”
Jotaro stared her down, stone faced. Hermès’ brain was moving at light speed, running calculations on the best way to diffuse the situation. She had seen Jotaro act… protective over Jolyne’s romantic life, but only in the context of Anasui’s begging for his blessing. She figured anyone would act strange if a convicted murderer begged for their daughter’s hand in marriage. But maybe she’d misjudged while trying to lighten the mood? Maybe Jotaro was particularly sensitive? Maybe she shouldn’t have said anything at all?
Jolyne set down her chopsticks abruptly, looking utterly shaken.
“Dad. I have to tell you something. Hermès is my girlfriend. We’re in love.”
Hermès froze, surprised by the abrupt confession. Jotaro’s gaze fixed itself on Jolyne, inscrutable as always. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but paused, and Jolyne rushed to fill the silence.
“Don’t say anything, dad. I… I don’t care if you don’t get it. I mean, you were probably just waiting for another excuse to walk out, right? So here’s your excuse. Your daughter’s gay, you can go now.”
“Jojo…”
“Don’t bother! If you’re going to leave, just leave.” Jolyne found Hermès’ hand and gripped it. “I get it. I’ve never been what you wanted, and now you know for a fact I never will be, because…”
“Jolyne.” Jotaro was forceful, but there was no malice in his tone. His gaze remained fixed on his daughter, who finally looked up to make eye contact. “Jolyne… I understand.”
Hermès could see the gears in her girlfriend’s head turning. Good lord, this girl. “You… understand?”
Jotaro sighed. “I understand, Jojo.”
Jolyne, for a moment, was stunned into silence.
“…Are you gay?”
This whole evening had been strange and uncomfortable, but this? Somehow this was the tipping point. Hermès failed to suppress the cackle that fell from her mouth. Jolyne looked at her in shock, which just made Hermès laugh harder.
“Jolyne! Baby. Light of my life. My perfect angel. Did you… Is this why you were so nervous? Jolyne, did you think your father was heterosexual?” Hermès paused her giggling momentarily to cast an apologetic glance at the man across the table. “Um, no offense, Dr. Kujo?”
Jotaro mumbled something under his breath in Japanese. Hermès couldn’t understand it, but she noticed the slightest tinge of a smile under the shadow cast by his hat. Jolyne, meanwhile, was blushing more intensely with every passing second.
“What the hell do you mean? Don’t tell me my dad came out to YOU before me!!”
Hermès laughed again. God, she loved this idiot. Every day she thanked the universe Jolyne had fallen into her life. Gorgeous, clever, stunning, toned, brilliant, STUPID Jolyne.
Hermès grabbed her girlfriend’s face between her hands. Jolyne’s breath caught in her throat at her touch. They locked eyes. Jolyne’s cheeks were warm and flushed, and Hermès felt another pang of tenderness well up in her chest.
“Jolyne. Babe. I want you to take a deep breath. And then I want you to look at your father, and his outfit, and look me dead in the eyes and tell me that is how a straight man looks.”
“Th- That doesn’t mean anything! His clothes? He married my mom, of course he’s straight!!”
“Jolyne Kujo, you are literally bisexual! You were in love with a man!”
Jolyne spluttered incoherently. Jotaro stayed quiet, but he looked… almost amused, for the first time Hermès could remember. At least, he wasn’t actively scowling.
“Dad... why didn’t you tell me?”
Jotaro… laughed? One hearty chuckle. Hermès barely recognized him with a smile on his face.
“It never came up in conversation?” he offered.
Jolyne let out a frustrated groan, dropping her head to the table. Hermès reached over to pat her shoulder, rubbing the birthmark there with her thumb.
“Gosh, babe. If I had known your gaydar was this bad, I would’ve asked you out a lot earlier! I just assumed you were shy, but I guess it really did take you two months to clock me!”
Jolyne groaned again.
Jotaro shrugged. “Runs in the family, I guess. I didn’t put it together with my partner until four dates in.” He casually popped the last bite of his salmon into his mouth, as though he hadn’t dropped a massive bomb mid-conversation. Hermès only had a moment to brace for Jolyne’s response.
“Dad, what the fuck!”
Not one to pass up a chance to embarrass her girlfriend, Hermès took the bait. “So you’re seeing someone, Dr. Kujo?”
Jotaro pulled his hat down over his eyes just slightly. “Yeah. Old friend of mine. We reconnected recently… You’d like him, Jolyne. Creative, sharp, kind of an asshole. Very smart guy. You even have similar Stands, come to think of it…”
Jolyne was reeling. “You have a BOYFRIEND? And he has a STAND? Dad, what the FUCK!”
Jotaro just chuckled.
———
The evening’s revelations behind them, the conversation eventually calmed down, along with the furious blush that had been coloring Jolyne’s cheeks. Jotaro even promised to introduce his mysterious boyfriend at their next dinner all together. Jolyne was collecting the dishes from the table when he finally, unceremoniously, announced that it was late and he would be departing.
“Yeah, of course. It was great to see you again, Dr. Kujo.” Hermès scrambled to collect his umbrella in an attempt to be helpful.
“Jotaro.”
Hermès blinked at the man in front of her. He tugged at his hat. “You can call me Jotaro. It’s my name, after all.”
“Oh, yes, um, of course!”
He turned to Jolyne who, despite herself, still looked a bit like a deer in headlights. Briefly, he hesitated, before resting his hand on his daughter’s shoulder.
To everyone’s surprise - including his own, judging from the look on his face - Jotaro pulled her in for a hug. “I’m proud of you, Jojo.”
He tugged at his hat once more, and nodded at the two before turning on his heels and stepping out the door. Jolyne blinked, staring at the space her father had been, his abrupt departure not leaving her time to process the show of affection.
Hermès looked at her, expectant.
Jolyne inhaled.
“Babe… what the FUCK was that?”
Hermès just laughed.