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Bella fluttered her eyes open with a groan of exhaustion, letting the haze of the fire light clear the blur. The stiffness in her arm came to her as she noticed it curled around Neyra’s half turned form sleeping in her embrace. By the look of the darkness outside the window, it must have been 2 am, at least. Where had the time gone?
She raised herself a bit to look at her, her lover's warm skin illuminated by the flame. The way her dark sweat dried hair draped her face, long eyelashes soft against her cheeks, made Bella's heart twinge. Neyra's smile was enough to make her sway when accompanied by those open violet eyes, but to have it be because she was in her arms? Something about it was wrong. Something about it was stolen .
This feeling of comfort was like fire, smoldering warmly in the bottom of her chest, but burning hot on every other inch. It had been years since they had touched, since a single soul had lovingly graced the golden viper without falling prey to its venom. How had she ended up here? How had she given in to Neyra’s temptation again after so long?
She promised herself the previous time would be the last. It had to be; they wouldn't give any more warnings to their match girl. But somehow, Belladonna kept falling back. It only took some honeyed words in her silvery timbre to make her give in.
Stay , she'd ask, just one last time.
Neyra needed an escape. Hell, both of them needed an escape, but one time turned into two times, two into three. Before she knew it, this ongoing cycle continued, but not any longer. This time, she would go.
She slipped her legs out slowly until she felt her burnt calloused soles touch the wooden ground. Years of circus training and fire yielded nothing but scars numb to touch. With it's strained weight, she tried to stand, but froze at the sound of her words.
"Bella?" she asked in a quiet tone, almost a whisper. "Where are you going, love?"
The words caught in her throat. She had hoped to not hear her. She knew it would stop her in her tracks, but she had to push through, regardless of it's pull.
"Close your eyes, Neyra. Go back to sleep," Bella monotonously replied. She took only a moment of hesitation before rising from the bed and walking to the dresser for her clothes. The night was cold, but she always ran hot. It didn't phase her.
"Why are you leaving?"
"Go before sunrise so no one sees you." Bella refused to give her the decency of eye contact. She had to have known it was her weak spot.
Neyra pulled the sheets over her body and went to her, reaching a hand for her pale shoulder. "Tell me, Belladona."
Instinctually, she flinched and shoved her away, backing up some before whipping around in defense. "Don't touch me…! I…" she faltered and draped an arm across her chest, falling back into her stand up mirror with a thud and catching her breath.
Those words...she had heard them before. His dark, lilted tone still irked her skin and grated her ears at the thought of it. Even after so many years, the scars wouldn't sink.
Neyra looked at her helplessly, retracting her hand. What words can you say to someone who has heard only the worst? Never had she been in that position, and never would she force Belladonna to explain it to her. That was her trauma, her experience. Only if she wanted to would she ask and lend an ear.
She walked up to her lover, slowly, as the other backed up.
"I'm…We shouldn't be doing this. It's not safe."
"I never asked for safety, Bella."
"You still deserve it. Not everyone has the choice," she looked crossed her arms over her chest and turned towards her reflection.
Her hair was a mess, red lipstick smeared across the outline of her lips. It was a Bella she wasn't used to, a viper not known to any world besides the one inside her bedroom. "I can't do this anymore."
After little hesitation, Neyra walked behind her and draped their shared sheets over the front of Bella's chest, arms wrapping around her as well. She rested her chin in the crook of her neck and let her head fall on her shoulder. "Not even once?"
"Once to you is ninth to me. Ninth in general. Stop trying to convince me."
"Come back to bed, Bella," she closed her eyes. "We can sleep. There is no one else here but you and me. I promise this is the end."
Pensively, she looks at Neyra's reflection and gives in. "This is definitely the end?"
"As much of an end as it could be."
Bella turned her head to meet her lips before wrapping them both together in cotton and bringing them back to bed. She could keep her promise...surely, she could. One last time...just once more.