Chapter Text
“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love.
When we are afraid, we pull back from life.
When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance.
We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections.
If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create.
Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”
- John Lennon -
“You do understand that to get inside the bar we have to get out of the car first, right?”
V moved her focus from her reflection in the windshield to the man beside her. The side of Johnny’s head rested against the passenger window, fingers drumming at his knees impatiently.
He lifted his head from the glass before letting it fall back against it with a soft thunk. “V.”
“Johnny.”
“They’re waiting for you.”
“No,” Her grip tightened on the wheel, “They’re waitin’ for you.”
“Look. You don’t have to do it here.” He shifted in the seat, bringing his head up from the window once more, “Go into the bar, get a feel for the place. Then slip into the bathroom and pop the pill there.”
V let go of the porche’s wheel, hands falling into the lap of her skirt that had managed to hitch itself up on the drive. She moved her stare from the reflection down to her exposed thigh, where a tech bullet had grazed her months ago. The streak left behind still pink with a healing scar.
We’re bullet proof chica, got nothing to worry about.
Jackie’s words had echoed in her head when the fighting died down. Each syllable triggered her heart to seize up more than the last – causing V to stay there, behind a crate, watching the blood pour down the side of her pant leg into her shoe and onto the concrete below. She remained there for much longer than she was stalling in the car now. Johnny had been considerably less patient then. He glanced over to her as the rain began to pick up, sending droplets scattering on the windows and the roof above them in their silence. Moments like this – with the rain barring down so loudly it overpowered the sound of his glitching – it felt like he was physically there. As if anyone who walked past the car would see her talking to the owner of the vehicle in the passenger seat and not empty air.
He looked back outside as a handful Maelstrom boys pulled into the lot before speaking – confusion at seeing members of the gang at a place like this seeding itself through him and, by extension her. “It’s just a scar, V. You have ones a lot bigger than that.”
“It was the first time my skin broke since the graft.” She explained, tugging the skirt down to its original place. Now it was her who shifted in the seat, closing Johnny’s jacket around herself. The motion causing the dog tags to clink against the bullet charm from Misty. As V overlapped the sides of the jacket, she covered the whitened scar that trailed down her stomach as if that action alone could hide it for the duration of the night.
He was right, she had larger scars. Almost all of them more life threatening than a graze on her thigh – it hardly effected the muscle there when it first happened. Wasn’t even worth bothering Vik over. The hit she took to the shoulder from Oda’s sword should be the one to give her pause, not this.
Maybe Nancy and Denny were wrong.
The outfit was too much. Johnny was going to get hot during the show, he’d take the jacket off and several identifiers that littered her body would be shown off, lighting up like a Christmas tree if anyone cared to look. The one down her abdomen stubbornly declaring her survival of a scav harvest nearly three years prior. Then again, if a scavenger managed to worm their way in, they’d see someone picked clean of their cyberware and any good organs. Not a woman with some of the most advanced chrome out of any other merc in the city and the latter being almost all replaced with synthetic versions.
V shook the thought away. An irrational fear in the back of her mind wasn’t going to ruin the night for her – for Johnny. Damnit, she looked good all things considered. V deserved to show herself off.
Under his jacket, a white holster top covered up little more than a bra in its place would. Intricate silver roses stitched throughout it could reflect the stage lights above if given the opportunity. Without the oversized coat, the toned muscles of her shoulders and back would be on full display, carrying down to the curve of her calves her heels showed off. They were a good height to walk in – hopefully her counterpart could manage. She knew Johnny wouldn’t say it, but the skirt made her ass look great. The top accentuated her chest in a way that made her look more like an old 2020’s noir femme fatal then some dirt girl from Heywood.
A ping went through her skull V couldn’t place – it almost felt like hurt.
She sighed trying not to think too far into it, “The titanium fiber skin graft." She continued, "Most hits just leave a big ass bruise but this,” She gestured to the scar now concealed under the skirt, “this was the first time the fibers fully separated. I got it done at the Atlanta center after-”
“Don’t go about trying to justify it to me.” Johnny stopped her, looking everywhere but inside the car. “I know.”
“Right.” V swallowed; a somber feeling swirled in her head that she tried to push away. “Right okay. No more stalling.”
“Finally.”
She opened the car door and began to get out, knowing that if she looked to where Johnny had been sitting he’d be gone. She almost wanted to pretend a card door slamming farther down the lot was him.
“More people here than I thought there’d be.” She thought as her metallic heels contacted with the rain-soaked gravel below.
“Must be here for the ribs.” Johnny’s voice echoed back, sending a wave of chills down the right side of her body, radiating from the Relic’s place in her skull. Every time he spoke without apparating near her it was as if he was leaning down over V’s shoulder, the same sensation there would be if he was whispering into her ear.
“The ribs?” Instinctually, she rolled her shoulder, as if that action could rid the feeling from her. “I haven’t been here in a few years but I don’t remember them being that good.”
“You’ve been?”
V nodded, once catching herself, pretending she was saying hello to someone in the Maelstrom group as she passed them. “Come on Johnny, you got access to all my memories; you know the answer.”
“Some are harder to get to than others. You know, we could-” The rest of Johnny’s response was cut off by a shout behind her. “Five steps from the door V, and you couldn’t get inside without trouble.”
“Shut up.”
“V! Hey V!” The voice called again from the direction of the Maelstrom crowd. There was a jostling form inside the small cluster, begrudged mumbles as people got moved out of the way until a familiar set of arachnid like red eyes popped out through to the other side.
“Dum Dum!” V smiled, turning on her heel from the door, “Hardly recognized you with a shirt on.”
“Heh, got to look my best for the last good concert I’ll ever see.” The lights on several of his sensors flickered, an indication that he was analyzing her. “Not lookin’ too bad yourself. Nice jacket, it your boyfriends?”
Johnny made his entrance, walking between them and then leaning against the wall to her right, one foot kicked up and leaning against the brick. He folded his arms over his chest causing his tags to clink against them. The aviators were back in their usual place, making it so she was unable to tell if he was looking at her or Dum Dum while his head remained forwards.
V mirrored Johnny's movements folding her arms over her chest and gripping the rolled-up sleeve of his jacket, “Nah, belongs to a friend of mine.” She looked towards the now filling parking lot and the people around them. A man in another group barked out a laugh, it was low and near guttural – like sandpaper on the back of a hand. V could have sworn she'd heard it before. A chill, different to the one caused by Johnny, ran through her. The dread of a rabbit hearing a wolf howl in the distance. Her voice became uneasy before fully masking it, “Lot of folks showing up for this.”
Dum Dum nodded, taking in the growing crowd, “Yeah, they're not letting anyone but the band and for a good while.”
V smiled, looking down and kicking a loose piece of gravel to the side. “Well, that shouldn't be a problem for me.”
He clocked his head to the side, the movement reminiscent of an owl. “Oh, you're not here for a job are you?”
“Not a job if I'm not getting paid. I’m ah, a stand in for one of the members.”
“No shit?”
She nodded, “I know a thing or two and I used to play here a few years back. So,” V shrugged, “Ker thought I'd be a good fit.”
“Kerry Eurodyne? You know Kerry Eurodyne? So well you call him Ker?”
“Oh yeah. Know him real well.”
“I didn’t say that.” V shot a glare towards Johnny's place amongst the bricks. “Just have a mutual friend is all.”
Once again he nodded, hesitantly this time, as if he didn't fully believe her. “Which strings you holding down?”
“Lead guitar.”
Dum Dum’s mouth hung open for a beat before he closed it, voice now incredulous as he whispered, “You playing Johnny?”
She looked down to him. Even without the heels she was a good inch taller. “What? Like it's hard?” V felt Johnny's eyes on her behind his glasses for only a split second then got the odd sensation they were scanning the crowd – towards the laugh she had heard.
“V...”
“I know.” She adjusted the sleeves of his jacket, ensuring the majority of the tattoo on her forearm was covered. “It's great to see you again, but I should probably get inside.” V hitched a thumb towards the door, Johnny was still looking into the crowd behind her.
“Right. ‘Course. Excited to listen to you play.”
“You ‘n me both.” They turned from each other. Dum Dum going towards his group and V the door.
“I'm with the band.” V said to the bouncer blocking her way. She cringed inwardly with the cliché she spoke aloud.
The man turned fully from his cigarette and looked down at her before raising a bushy eyebrow. “Well, well pretty far from the Coyote aren't we V?”
“Oh great. Someone else you know.”
V looked up at the man, wracking her brain for the recognition of his face. When that proved unsuccessful, she quickly scanned him with her Koroshi. He worked night security at Mama Welles’, Vik was his ripper too. Knew V before she went by V. How could she forget? “Gabriel Gonzalez, it's been a while, Pepe’s been missin’ you somethin awful. This is-” She backtracked before she could introduce Johnny. “This is a big night huh?”
“Mhm, I'm sure he is. I didn't know you still played.”
“I don't, but I'm making an exception for a friend.”
Gabriel nodded in one slow motion then flicked the ashes of a cigarette to the side. “Then I won't let any unsavory types get in and spoil your night mija.” He tapped his elbow with the hand holding the cigarette, “Next time you see your uncle, let him know I need to get my joint checked out. Hurts when it rains.”
V reached out for the cigarette to which he handed her without hesitation, before looking taken aback. Gabriel hummed, “Viky know you smoke now?”
She shook her head blowing the smoke out to the side, “I don't smoke. And I'm not your receptionist, you gotta book your own appointment with him.”
He let out a huff then took the cigarette back. “Yeah. Yeah. In you go.” Gabriel moved to the side, “And V.”
“Hm?”
“Have fun tonight.”