Chapter Text
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Though Eren started out on this trip happy to not be in day care, he was crying now; he didn't want to stand on the bus. People around her were giving Hange dirty looks, asking her to keep her child quiet… Her child… Huh…Guess that's what he was now: Her child.
"I can't hold you now Eren, I'm sorry, I have to hold Armin since he's not as big and strong as you." Hange smiled patiently down at the child from behind her glasses and her words silenced him.
"Big and s-strong?" He asked, large green eyes shining up at her, still moist from crying, but clearly filled with pride at the compliment. Hange smirked, she knew exactly how to calm her little brother down, being big and strong was always his wish, he had a habit of standing in front of the television and screaming at all of the bad guys on tv that he would get big and strong and come to beat them up, it was cute and using that compliment was a great way to calm him down.
"Of course you are!" Hange smiled brightly, wishing she could pat him on the head, but with Armin in one hand and her other hand holding onto a pole to keep her upright, she couldn't quite do it, she could only smile instead. She'd been doing that a lot lately… Smiling even though she was tired.
"Big Sis?" Eren called all calmed down and happy to be praised for his strength, "Are we almost there, you said we are going to see mommy again right?" Eren asked innocently. Hange bit her lip a moment, her eyes stinging a bit now… Was that what she'd told him before? That they were going to see mommy and daddy? They were, but she knew it wasn't at all what Eren was thinking it was. Eren had been asking Hange all week where mommy and daddy were and Hange had been assuring him they'd see them soon before going into her own room to cry.
How could she tell a four year old that their parents were dead?
"Ah, this is our stop!" Hange fumbled reaching out for the cord that signaled for the bus driver to stop, she nearly toppled over as she did, Armin's leg hit a short tattooed guy next to her in the head and she got a dirty look that she hardly noticed as the bus came to a stop and she and her brothers got off.
Eren spotted a puddle almost as soon as they got off of the bus and as if entranced by it, immediately went for it, "Eren no!" She called out, Eren turned around snapped out of his daze by his sister's voice, "You're wearing your nice clothes Eren, you should't ruin them." She chided and Eren looked down at his little suit and shiny shoes.
"Why are we so dressed up to see Mommy and Daddy?" Eren's little face scrunched up as he asked the question, looking awfully confused.
"Well… Let's go inside first… There's something I have to tell yo about Mommy and Daddy-" reaching out for his hand, Hange led the boys inside for the memorial service slowly… This wasn't going to be easy.
The crying went on for hours. Eren held the picture frames of his mother and father close to him as tears leaked down his face, two year old Armin who'd been asleep for much of the trip here had awoken once he heard Eren crying and immediately started cry in once he saw his brother upset.
Hange didn't cry. Hange pulled out tissues from her bag and dabbed them on Eren and Armin's faces, she held them close as they clung to her crying wordlessly, she pat their backs until they'd tired themselves out from crying before slinging her bag over her shoulder and gathering Eren and Armin in her arms ignoring how heavy they were. Thankfully she was given a seat on the bus, and the cool early spring night air wasn't too cold as she carried the sleeping boys home, she placed them in their respective beds once they arrived and went back to her own room. Hange left the door cracked open in case Eren woke up and wanted to find her and slipped her bag from her shoulders, placing the diapers she'd brought along with her for Armin aside and pulling out her textbooks so that she could pass her exam tomorrow.
Hange stared at the page in her textbooks that held all sorts of wonderful information that she was eager to learn, but by the time she got to the bottom of the page, she realized she couldn't remember anything she'd just read and she laughed bitterly to herself. She wanted to finish school and get a good job as a marine biologist in order to take care of her mother and father and make sure that they could retire early, but why was she studying now? Her parents had died in an accident that they caused and both were barely hanging on all week, they had no life insurance to speak of, no money that hadn't gone to her education or to their medical bills to pay off the time they's been in the hospital… And now Hange who just a week ago had been a carefree hardworking, 21 year old student, was left alone had two mouths to feed and no other family to help them.
Hange took a ragged breath and with shaky hands, pulled out her laptop, went to a search engine and looking up jobs that would hire her right now… Even if it meant she had to take time from school, or she'd never sleep again, or even that she'd have to let her GPA slip… Hange was going to put food on the table for her two little brothers if it killed her.
-Levi-
Levi got off of his bus with a splitting headache. It was bad enough that he was dead tired, but then some lady on the bus standing next to him had a screaming kid, and if that wasn't bad enough, the foot of the other kid she was holding knocked against his head while she tried to get off. The headache was irritating, but he couldn't be flat out mad at her, she looked young and she already had two kids? Least she was doing her best… Nothing like his own mother.
Levi sighed tiredly, taking in the cool air and started walking towards the daycare to get his little sister; Mikasa.
-
"Levi." Mikasa smiled very faintly as she walked up to her big brother and grabbed hold of the bottom of his leather jacket the moment he entered the daycare.
"Hey there." He smirked tiredly, utterly exhausted from working straight through the night before coming to get her (the very reason he didn't trust himself to drive to come get her), but he still bent down and picked her up.
Mikasa wrapped her little arms around her big brother's neck, burying her face into the scarf she was wearing… Now that he thought about it, she'd been wearing that all winter, it stunk… And he didn't remember buying it, he was sure as hell that their mother hadn't bought it.
"Hey, kid, where'd you get that scarf?" Levi asked reaching out to touch the red fabric she had around her neck as he carried her out of the day care, but she quickly slapped his hands away.
"No touch." She said flatly and his brows jumped as he looked down at her little hands that looked prepared to smack his hands away again.
"Oi, what's so special about that? It stinks." Levi asked as he carried his sister to the bus stop, sitting her down next to him in the little booth while they waited.
"Eren gave this to me, so you can't touch it." She spoke firmly, her hands holding tight to the scarf around her and a twinkle of affection in her eyes and Levi scoffed.
"Hey, you just smacked me, is that Eren kid more important than me?"
"Yes." Mikasa nodded firmly and all Levi could do was scoff seeing that this little brat who he was working his ass off to feed and clothe had already put some other little brat ahead of him in lines of importance… Still he was glad to at least see she was making friends, something she'd never been too good at before. She'd gone to the day care for most of her life while Levi was working, and it wasn't until last year that she met some snot nosed brat named Eren and had ben going on about him ever since.
"Tch, fine, but I'm still washing it, smells like…" Levi paused, not wanting to say 'shit', "Poop." he amended at the last moment. Mikasa, as stoic as she was, laughed at the word as any four year old would and Levi smiled to himself at the rare sound.
As they waited for the bus, Mikasa went into detail for the millionth time on how great Eren was and how his hair looked like chocolate, and his eyes looked like her favorite green crayon and Levi listened patiently as his sister spoke, glad to see her excited about something… Even if it was some shitty kid. Mikasa was still going on about Eren when her eyes fell on an older kid walking by with her mother, they were laughing and eating ice-cream together. Levi looked over to Mikasa, seeing the envy in her eyes as she watched the other kid, he could only sigh. He couldn't give her a mother's love… and if he was going to have enough money to send her on a class trip that was coming up in a few weeks with the rest of the students, he couldn't even afford to buy her an ice cream cone.
"It's too cold for ice cream… You'll get sick if you eat it now" Levi sighed, patting her head, "I'll buy you some when the weather gets warmer, we can eat it at the park if you want."
"Can we bring Eren too?" She asked excitedly and Levi rolled his eyes, was Eren the sun? Could she not live without Eren?
"If Eren's family says he can, then why not?" Levi sighed, the prospect of having to drag around somebody else's brat already tiring him out. A smile crossed the little girls face as she leaned her head against her big brother. He didn't really want to bring that 'Eren' kid along, but if it made her smile, he could at least give Mikasa that much happiness. She never asked for much.
"Good, Eren's been sad," Mikasa pouted as she remembered Eren crying earlier in the week, "He said his mama and papa haven't come home all week, and he didn't even come to school today…" Mikasa mumbled worriedly.
Levi looked down at his sister, amazed not only by the empathy of this kid for another kid despite her own situation, but for how well spoken she was when she decided to speak. Maybe those educational CDs he'd bought for were paying off, cuz she certainly didn't learn it from him, and definitely not their mother, she was usually too messed up to even form sentence.
"The bus!" Mikasa enthused, getting to her feet and pulling Levi's hand, happy that she might be able to eat ice cream with Eren.
"Ay, slow down, you'll pull me over." he dug in his pockets, pulled out some bus money, forked it over to the bus driver and sat next to Mikasa. The bus lurched forward, Mikasa looked out of the window silently, Levi tried his best to stay awake, neither of them looked forward to going home.
They got off at the last stop, the very last stop in the part of town where people walked fast just to get to their homes and had multiple locks on the doors, but hey, it was home. Mikasa held her head high as she held tight to Levi's hands. Levi was proud of the kid for remembering what he'd taught her; Never let them see you sweat.
It wasn't a long walk from the bus stop to the shitty apartment complex they lived in. Levi fished around in his pockets for his keys… Nothing… he must have left them at work again… Dammit, this is what happened when he didn't get enough sleep.
He knocked on the door. No reply, he knew his mom was home, she never left her spot in front of the television unless she was out to get another fix.
"Rose! Open the door!" Levi called tiredly, banging his fist against the door. There was shuffling on the other end. Levi sighed, at least she was conscious today, he hated when he brought Mikasa home and she was passed out on the floor, he knew it scared his sister even if she wouldn't admit it.
Levi and Mikasa heard the locks undoing and he sighed as he made a list of things to do in his head; take a shower, wash Mikasa's newly acquired scarf and go to sleep. That plan was pretty much wrecked the moment the door flew open and a big ass man came flying out at him with a knife in his hand.
"Who the hell are you to Rose to come over in the middle of the day, calling her like that, Huh?" The man was demanding, eyes as wild as the wide arcs he was making with the knife swinging at both Levi and Mikasa. Levi dodged, his eyes on Mikasa watching as she quickly scurried out of harms way.
"I'm her offspring you piece of shit!" Levi boomed, grabbing the man's wrist and twisting it back until the man howled in pain and seemed more cooperative than before. With a thud, Levi knocked the man to the ground and took his knife, "Get the hell out of here before they threaten to kick us out for noise or some shit!" Levi spun the knife around his finger, making sure the man knew that if Levi felt like it, he could do way worse than twist back a wrist. The man scurried off down the hall like the cockroach he was and Levi put the knife in his back pocket; finders keepers.
Mikasa scurried to Levi's side, staying a few steps behind as he entered their apartment, making sure that there were no more surprises.
"Go on to the room, Kasa." Levi ushered her in and the little girl ran straight to the back of the apartment, not looking at her mother once and she shut the door behind her, not wanting to hear Levi and Rose argue again.
"Dammit Levi." Rose mumbled under her breath, "He was offering to pay rent this month." she whined, "Another thing you fucked up, huh? That's why we don't have anything nice around here, that's why we can't even move to a nicer place, you're always messing things up." Rose snorted, taking a sip of booze.
"I pay rent." Levi grumbled, "We both know what you were going to do with his money and it wasn't save for a damn new apartment!" Levi growled looking into his mother's dead eyes. She smiled at him, yellowed teeth peeking out from behind cracked lips.
"So what? It's the only joy I have in life now. You two little shits sure as hell didn't give me the happiness all those books said kids bring, ya'know?" She snorted a laugh, "I'm going out." She took another swig before getting to her feet, grabbing her jacket, and a large backpack that she sometimes took with her when she would go out and Leave Mikasa and Levi at the apartment for days, sometimes weeks even.
"Take your time." Levi grumbled, watching her leave, wishing she'd come back different, but knowing that her coming back different would most likely mean she was worse.
"Just take care of that extra mouth to feed, she still doesn't even bother taking care of herself." Rose sniffed, her flat pitch black eyes landing o him in an unamused manner.
Levi's jaw clenched, whatever Rose said about him was fine, but she was not going to talk about Mikasa that way. Hell, Levi might have resented his dead beat mom for hardly acknowledging his existence and making him be responsible for her so young, and resented her even more when she announced that she was having another kid, but… Mikasa grew on him, he was 18 when she was born and she ended up changing him for the better. Levi fed her and bathed her, rocked her to sleep, woke up to keep her from crying, while Rose napped on the couch and yelled for 'the kid to stop being noisy', Mikasa was the main reason that Levi grew the hell up, he'd stopped smoking, drinking, hanging around with no good people and generally messing up his life and started working odd jobs to take care of her… Some of those odd jobs he took on back then were less than savory and might have not helped in his effort turn his life around, but it fed her. Now he worked a few decent stand up jobs, bought her nice things when he could, could feed her without too much trouble and just hoped what he did for her was enough to make up for Rose being their mother...
The door slammed shut as Rose stormed out of the apartment, a red sheet of paper that had been jammed in the door fell loose and floated to the floor. With restrained rage, Levi crossed the room and picked it up… An eviction notice, they were to be out in five days.
"…Shit." Levi mumbled to himself, clenching the paper in his fist… Rose carrying her backpack played back in his mind… There was no way she didn't know about the eviction… "Shit!" the sheet of paper fell to the ground as Levi stormed back to his mothers room to find the whole thing bare save for a piece of paper on the floor… The man from before must have helped her clean out while he and Mikasa were away. Snatching up the paper from the floor, Levi ran for the hallway window that looked out over the apartment's parking lot, reaching the window just in time to see his mother get into the car of the man whose ass he'd just handed to him, and drive off.
"ROOOOSE!!!" Levi growled from the window as he watched the weathered light blue van pull off, but it didn't stop the van, and his mother didn't look back once.
"Shit… SHIT!" His fist slammed into the wall, and he looked down at the note that Rose had left behind.
"I know, I'm a crappy parent, you're twice the mom I'll ever be you little shit faced brat. I'm just another mouth for you to feed around here. Least now you won't have to work as many jobs. Didn't mean to leave you with the eviction notice, but shit happens. Take care if Mikasa -Rose"
The sound of Levi's fist pounding into the apartment hallway echoed down the hall as he dropped the note. The nicest thing his mother ever fucking said to him was this goodbye.
A little hand wrapped around his as his four year old sister looked up at him. Levi looked down to see Mikasa standing next to him, the red eviction notice that he's dropped earlier in her hand as she looked up at him with honest eyes.
"We don't have to get ice-cream." he voice came quietly, bouncing off of the walls of the dingy apartment hallway and it broke Levi.