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5. Social Smile
Noah has been grumpy all day. Steve thinks it’s probably because he didn’t sleep at all during the night, for some reason, and now he’s overtired but not sleepy and fussy. Steve tries to settle him, but he’s just not having any of it. Steve gives a loud huff. He’s starting to get a little fussy himself.
Slowly but surely, he’s been getting back to his old self. Or new self, he supposes, seeing as the way he was when he was pregnant, all small and frail and angles, was his original self. Now, he’s bulking up again, just like Bruce said he would. Six weeks, and he’s almost there. He’s just got one more inch and a couple of pounds to grow, so he thinks he’s doing well.
But it has made him pretty damn tired; more tired than usual. And he eats a hell of a lot more, as is to be expected. They’ve had to go back to buying masses of food, and they’ve pulled Steve’s pre-pregnancy clothes back out. It’s a pretty damn good feeling.
But still, it makes Steve tired, and grumpy. And that makes baby grumpy. Which makes Steve grumpy. It’s a vicious cycle of grumpiness.
Steve hears the door open, and then close. He’s trying to get a bottle in between Noah’s lips, but it’s like the kid knows he’s being difficult; he keeps them clamped shut, or turns his head away. God damn it.
“Hey, babe,” Bucky says, as he enters the living room. “What’s- are you okay?”
“Noah’s being difficult.” he answers, frowning as he tries to get the fussy little thing to take his bottle. It’s still not happening. Steve sighs.
Bucky must sense that he’s losing his patience - Steve Rogers, World’s Most Patient Man, losing it at last - and so he picks Noah up, and he smiles at him.
And Noah smiles right back.
Noah’s done a lot of random smiling in his six weeks of living. Smiling at the ceiling, at Bucky’s metal hand, at Steve’s shoulder. But never has he smiled back when one of them has smiled at him first.
It’s kind of a big deal.
His smile fades, and Bucky turns to Steve, incredulous.
“Steve, come here. Come here, look.”
Steve shifts to stand by his side; Bucky cups Noah’s head in his flesh hand, holds his body up with the other.
“Smile at him.” He prompts.
Steve pauses, and then smiles.
Noah smiles back, and then shoves his fist in his mouth.
“He smiles back!” Bucky crows, almost triumphant, pulling the baby up to his chest to cuddle him. “He’s so clever, clever baby boy.”
Steve laughs, and watches Noah smile around his fist. It’s ridiculously cute, and makes them both smile even wider, all of them. Steve moves only to take a picture, and when he finds himself staring at it a few hours later, he discovers he just isn’t grumpy anymore.
4. Grabbing
Steve’s first heat after being pregnant is fine. He takes his suppressants, and he gets through it. Bucky gets a little weird, spending half his time glaring at him and the other half rubbing his nose against the bite mark, but Steve puts that down to the intervention into his basic biology and writes it off.
He forgets to take the suppressants, though. Noah is fussy, or needs fed, or needs his diaper changed, or the world needs saving, or there’s a press conference to do- there’s always something. And Steve just… forgets. Suppressants become the last thing on his mind.
And that’s where the problem starts.
Six months after giving birth, he goes into his first heat. He finds himself standing against the kitchen bench with an ice pack pressed to his neck, trying to cool himself down. He also finds Bucky standing in the bedroom door, caught between wanting to go to Steve and wanting to look after his baby, who’s currently sitting in his bouncy chair staring up at the ceiling. Steve can feel his briefs growing damp with slick, and Bucky must smell it, because he quickly straightens up.
“I’m going to call nat!”
Natasha arrives with an unimpressed look and a baby carrier.
“You two are the fucking worst.” She says, as she scoops Noah up and holds him to her chest, rather than set him down in the carrier. He gurgles, and Natasha coos at him. She’s no good with babies and Steve didn’t question that, but she’s proven to be a pretty good godmother so far.
She appraises them both, and sighs. Bucky hands over the baby bag, which once he’d everything Steve was going to need to go to the hospital; now it holds everything they need to take baby out of the house. Handy.
“Be careful, you too.” Natasha says. “No breaking the apartment. Now come on, say goodbye to baby.”
Bucky leans in, and presses a kiss to Noah’s forehead. Steve leans in too, but Noah catches him, holding onto his shirt with a tiny fist. It’s the first time he’s grabbed something and held on before, all of his own accord, and for a second, Steve doesn’t move. SOmething kicks in at the back of his mind. He knows it’s basic primal instinct, but he begins to try to wrangle Noah from Natasha’s grasp, frown deep-set in his features.
“He has to stay, he can’t go, he needs me, I’m his mom-”
“Steve, he’ll be fine, it’s just for a day. You’ll see him this time tomorrow.” Natasha reasons.
“No, see, ‘cause he’s my baby and I gotta look after him.” Steve counters, stepping closer. “Pass him here, look, he wants me-”
“Steve-” Natasha sighs, exasperated. Noah has let go of his shirt but it doesn’t change what Steve wants.
“Natasha, give me my baby, for the love of fu-”
“Steve.”
That time it’s Bucky. And maybe because he’s in heat or maybe it’s the tone of voice Bucky used but Steve stops, edging back towards his mate. Bucky wraps an arm around his waist. “We’ll see him tomorrow.” He soothes, and Steve gives a nod as he pushes his face into bucky’s neck. It was like he had completely forgotten his heat when he had needed to have Noah back, but now that he’s surrounded by Bucky, his warm and his smell and his body, he can’t help but be lulled back under, eyes closing as he huddles into Bucky’s chest.
He doesn’t notice Natasha go, but he does feel uneasy.
It takes Bucky pounding him into the mattress to make that knot unfurl in his stomach.
3. Pulling up to stand
It’s a lazy day. Steve is out avenger-ing in the most mundane way possible’ sitting in front of Nick Fury’s desk and filling out sheet after sheet of paper work after his last big battle. Bucky think it’s hilarious. Steve, as unofficial leader, has to take a lot of the paperwork that Pepper can’t handle. Bucky’s just glad it keeps him out of trouble for a while.
Noah is sitting on the floor, as Bucky watches the television idly. It’s an easy way to waste a day, a good form of easy entertainment; they had to keep themselves amused back in the 40s. And he remembers that. All of it.
Noah’s blocks are on the table, because they’re small enough that if Bucky doesn’t watch him whilst he plays with them, he could well shove them in his mouth and choke. Steve has told him that they’re a bit too big for that, actually, but Bucky’s not taking any chances.
Noah can sit up by himself now, so it means Bucky has to spend a lot less time holding him; he’s a big boy now, just gone ten months, and Bucky loves it. He was adorable as a newborn, sure, but he’s even more adorable now that he can babble at you, and wave, and drag himself across the floor.
Bucky can see him reaching for the yellow block on the table; they discovered a little while ago that Noah really likes yellow, it’s his favourite colour, so Bucky’s not surprised that Noah wants it down. It means he’ll have to stop watching the Hispanic soap opera he’s found just as Carolina was about to tell Blanca that she slept with Antonio to reach over and get it, but it’s better than having Noah start wailing all over the place.
So he leans forward, or at least, he’s about to, when tiny hands clamp around the table edge and Noah hoists himself up onto little socked feet.
Bucky stares.
And then he snaps a photo.
Noah looks torn between getting his block and staying on his feet, so Bucky leans forward and scoops him up, grabbing the block off the table with his other hand. he settles Noah on his chest, expecting to hear him giggle, but he just shoves the block in his mouth instead.
“Did you pull yourself up?” Bucky asks, in that soft, slightly-higher pitched voice he does instead of baby talk. Because Bucky Barnes, ex-assassin, ex-communist ally, doesn’t do baby talk. “Did ya? Huh, Noah? Did you pull yourself up?”
“Did who pulls whose self up?” Steve asks as he comes in the door, shedding his jacket and putting down a bag of groceries.
Bucky throws his phone at him, knowing fine well that he’ll catch it. There’s a pause, in which Bucky removes the block from Noah’s mouth and tickles his stomach, and Steve presumably looks at the photograph. And then, of course, he’s moving to Bucky’s side with wide eyes, beaming at Noah, who beams right back.
“Did you stand up? Did you stand up all on your own?”
There’s a lot of cooing, and Noah begins to babble, a stream of babababa with enough inflection to make it sound like a sentence.
“Such a clever boy.” Steve murmurs, pressing a kiss to their baby’s head, and then another to Bucky’s lips, looking at him with a smile. Their baby boy is growing up, but that’s alright. They’re in it together.
2. First word
It’s a lazy day. The carnage from Steve’s last heat has just been cleared away, meaning their bedroom is all nice and neat and new, and so they’re just lying in bed together, lounging. Noah sits in between them, grabbing onto his toes individually with that little pincer grasp he developed not too long ago. It’s adorable; Steve and Bucky know fine well that they could watch him all day.
It’s his birthday in a few days. He’ll be one. One. An entire year old, and yet it doesn’t seem like yesterday that Bucky was painting a nursery in the dead of night, or Steve was out baby shopping with Natasha. It’s passed ridiculously quickly, and Steve just doesn’t understand where the time has gone. He doesn’t mind, of course. Watching Noah grow up is a pretty magnificent thing. It just worries him, how quickly it’s all flying by. He’s worried it’ll pass him by without him even noticing.
But enough of the depressing thoughts, he thinks. Bucky kicks his foot under the duvet, and Steve looks over. He’s giving him that wicked little smirk that Steve knows all too well, and Steve tries to suppress a grin. Bucky always stay in rut for a few days after Steve’s heat’s over; Steve doesn’t know if all alphas do that or if it’s just Bucky, but either way, he doesn’t care. He actually likes it. A lot.
“C’mon then, Noah.” Steve says as he sits up. He shivers at the loss of the duvet, but he knows he’ll be getting all hot bothered in a few minutes anyway. “You want to go have a nap?”
“No.” Comes the reply uttered from tiny lips, and Steve stops dead.
“What?” He asks. Bucky sits up behind him.
“No.” Noah replies, sounding bored as he shoves his hand into his mouth, and looks at Steve.
“Is that-”
“Did he just say-”
“No.” Noah repeats. He goes back to playing with his toes.
Steve looks at Bucky, and Bucky looks at Steve, and they grin.
“Noah,” Bucky says, shuffling forward on his elbows until he’s almost face to face with the baby. “Don’t you want to go to bed?”
“No.” Noah responds, directing bright blue eyes at his papa.
Steve settles back onto the bed, and grins at them both. “Noah,” He asks slowly. “Why don’t you want to go to bed? Don’t you want to see Bucky Bear?”
“No.” Noah says again, head shaking. Steve and Bucky are about to vibrate out of the skin, faces gleeful as they talk, actually have a conversation - albeit a bit of a stunted one - with their son.
“But Bucky Bear’ll miss you, kiddo.” Bucky says, trying not to laugh. “Won’t that make him sad?”
“No.”
“So you don’t want to go to bed, Noah?”
“No.”
“I guess you’ll just have to stay here then.”
“No.”
Steve gives a chuckle, scooping Noah up and blowing a raspberry on his stomach, listening to his squeals of delight. Noah does actually go for a nap after that, giving Bucky and Steve a little bit of time to get back to what they originally had planned, but if Bucky then sneaks into Noah’s room and films them having a conversation, well, that’s entirely his business, isn’t it?
1. Pretend Play
Steve catches him doing it. He’s stood in his room at the table with the old phone on it, which of course is disconnected. He’s got a pad of paper, and a pen, and he’s holding the phone to his ear. He scrawls into the paper with his free hand, swaying a little on his feet. Steve is already recording; he really has no intention of interrupting him.
“No, no, no,” He says into the phone, head shaking, breaking into a bout of babbling. Steve has no idea what he’s talking about, but it’s adorable. “Tony!” He says, gesticulating wildly with his free hand, and Steve thinks he begins to understand as he babbles some more. “Sowwy. Bye bye.”
Noah puts the phone down and then scribbles a little bit onto his sheet of paper, and Steve totally understands, then. He’s pretending he’s daddy.
Steve puts the camera away and steps into the room, crouching down beside him. “Who was that on the phone, kiddo?”
“Fuwy.” He nods. Steve assumes he means Fury. He fights a smile as he nods seriously. Noah pauses, whether searching for the right word or just losing his train of thought Steve doesn’t known, but he comes back fairly quickly. “No work day.” He says, before breaking into a load of babbling again.
“No work day?” Steve asks, as Noah puts a hand on top of his head, fingers curling in soft brown hair. He nods, a little distracted, as babies often are, he supposes. Steve notices Bucky hovering in the doorway, and he nods to him, gesturing for him to come inside. “Papa, Noah says it’s a no work day.”
“A no work day?” Bucky echoes, settling down on the floor beside Steve. They share a smile, and look to Noah, who drops onto his butt and looks at them both.
“No work day.” Noah repeats with a nod, still distracted. “Dada stay. Papa stay.”
“Don’t worry, kiddo,” Steve says, grinning at him. “Dada and Papa will stay.”
Noah nods, and looks around. He tends to do that when he’s tired, they’ve learned, and so this time it’s Bucky who picks him up and pulls him into his lap, giving his tummy a tickle just like used to when he was little. Noah bats at him rather than giggles. He’s at that stage now.
“Dada and papa are gonna stay right here.”
Noah nods, apparently glad to hear it, and then he lets his eyes flicker shut, falling asleep in Bucky’s arms. It’s kind of adorable. And of course, Steve then shows Bucy the video from before, which is just too cute. Maybe Noah is growing a little fast, but at least they won’t forget a second of it.
+1 A new arrival
When Noah is twenty one months old, Steve goes into Stark Tower for the day, to have a meeting with Pepper. Bucky is out on reconnaissance with Natasha, and so the baby has been entrusted into Sam and Thor’s care for the time behind; Steve knows he’ll be fine. He likes Uncle Sam and Uncle Thor the best.
But when Steve steps into the elevator, Jarvis asks him, in his polite, if somewhat clipped, tone, if he knows that he’s currently one inch shorter than he usually is.
Steve asks them to take him to the lab, rather than to Pepper’s office.
And that’s why Steve is sitting up in bed, light on, waiting up for Bucky. He’s been awake for a pretty long time now; it’s nearly 5 o’clock in the morning. Noah will be waking up in about an hour, maybe two. Steve should probably rest, but-
The window opens, and Bucky tumbles in, wrapped in black kevlar, still wearing his mask. He frowns as he pulls it away from his eyes, discarding it.
“Steve? It’s like 4, what the hell are you-?”
Steve doesn’t let him finish. He cuts in with, “I’m pregnant.”
Bucky stops dead, and blinks. Black smudged around his eyes, Steve thinks he looks like a startled raccoon, but he holds in his giggles. Now isn’t a time to be giggling.
“Oh.” He says.
Steve nods. “oh.” He echoes.
Bucky pauses, and then breaks into a grin. He crawls across the bed towards Steve, kissing him, pressing him back into the bed. He covers the length of Steve’s body with his own like any good alpha would, and noses at his skin. “That’s amazing, Steve. We’re happy, right?”
“Of course we are.” Steve grins, leaning in to kiss him. “Of course!”
Bucky grins, kissing him over, and over, and over again, down over his neck and his cheeks and his jaw, smiling into his skin. “Another baby.” He murmurs. “Fuck, Steve, we’re having another baby!”
“Yeah,” Steve agrees, grinning brightly. “Think it’ll be as hard as last time?”
Bucky purses his lips against a smile, and shrugs. “We’ll wait and see, huh?”
Steve gives a nod, lips twitching upwards. “Let’s wait and see.”