Chapter Text
Chan is having a restless night. Restless, and if he’s being a little honest, tispy, since his boredom drove him to his stash of soju under his bed. There’s an itch right under his skin, a heat rising up his back that makes him want to rip his shirt off, and yes, okay, he’s probably a little horny. He’s so on edge, he jumps almost a foot out of bed when his phone vibrates on his nightstand. His fingers scrabble for it on the wooden surface, and he plops back down with a huff when he sees the notification.
H.hyunjinnie
Hyung where r u
I thot we were finally going to get u to come out w us smh
Chan ignores him. He had absolutely no desire to go to some sweaty party, get drunk off horrible punch and make poor attempts to talk to some cute yet uninterested boys before dragging Hyunjin home to puke into the toilet. They had done enough of that Chan's freshman year, when Hyunjin, still in high school, would come visit for a weekend, puke his way through Friday and Saturday nights, and then go home on Sunday, leaving Chan with the mess. Chan was an old man now, he reasoned to himself. He deserved to stay home on a Saturday night, with a nice, cute, flexible boy to take to bed. He lets out a dramatic sigh. The boy is the only thing missing from his perfect evening.
It’s only nine thirty, still plenty of room left. He settles back on his pillows and opens Tinder again. He always felt a little dirty, swiping through hordes of pretty men like he was window shopping or something, but sometimes that could be fun, made him feel like he had a lot more game than he probably did. He swipes through a few boys, taking note only really of their age, swiping left on everyone above 23, and their photo, swiping right on, if he was being honest, everyone else. A profile comes up of a boy in a puffy black hoodie, hood up over his hair, staring moodily at the camera. A breath catches in Chan’s throat. His hair was a little messy, like he had just gotten out of bed, and his lips, plush and pointed at his cupid’s bow, curved in the smallest hint of a smile. Chan, despite himself, scrolls to his bio, disappointed at first to only see a line of text under his name, and then all at once his stomach climbs up into his chest.
Felix, 19
Wanna take care of me?
Chan stared breathlessly at his phone screen. Yes, his brain screamed, but Chan was too busy taking in the tiny quirk of those plump heart shaped lips and the way the boy seemed to be staring into his soul with his big, dark eyes. Even if he never matched with this boy, or saw him again, those lips would be forever burned into his eyelids.
Ding.
With big eyes, Chan stares at his tiny phone screen, the little bubble that says, It’s a match! cheerily as if the wind hadn’t just been knocked out of him. With shaking hands, he taps his messages, where sure enough, there’s now a little chat box for him and Felix, taunting him to send the first message. Suddenly, Chan is hyper conscious of his own, dorky, profile filled with goofy photos and cheesy bio with his height and star sign. Something about the boy in the picture, the simple, taunting, request in his bio, seemed so aloof, so far out of Chan’s league that he could not comprehend why they were matched in the first place. His fingers hover over the keyboard for a second, before he quickly types out a message and hits send before he could regret it.
Chan
Are you still looking for someone to take care of you?
He bites the edge of his thumb nervously, now sitting up on the edge of his bed, alert. He sits like that frozen for a second, before
Felix is typing…
Oh god , Chan thinks, he’s really eager to reject me. He’s going to digitally spit in my face, call me a loser, ask how I ever matched with someone like him in the first place .
Felix
It depends
Chan waits, air sucked out of his lungs.
Felix
Do you live in a dorm
He tilts his head. I guess he can see they go to the same university .
Chan
No, i have an apartment
He bites his thumb a little harder, almost drawing blood. Felix wasn’t saying anything back. He closes his eyes and hits send.
Do you wanna come over?
Chan has never been this ballsy in his life, he feels the adrenaline (and the alcohol) surging through him, lighting every nerve on fire, his stomach a pit of anxiety. He wanders over to the bathroom, staring at his phone.
Felix
Are you free tonight?
Oh god, oh god, was this a booty call? Was he, Bang Chan, Christopher Bang, participating in a booty call? God, if only Hyunjin were sober enough to come slap him and wake him up from what is clearly the weirdest dream of his life.
Chan
Yeah, just hanging out at home. Had a little to drink, if I’m honest.
Chan curses himself. Admitting to this beautiful boy that he’s lame and drunk and has no evening plans was not the plan. He looks at himself in the mirror above the sink- somewhat ragged, blonde hair a tangled mess, grey sweats and t-shirt rumpled and stained. This was not a good idea.
He washes his face and combs his hair, just in case, you know, and when he looks at his phone again he has three messages from Felix.
Felix
Mmm you have any whiskey?
I could come keep you company :)
You don’t have to drink alone
That little smiley face. Chan does a victory dance. How in the hell did he manage this. Ha, and Hyunjin thought he was lame.
Chan
Yeah! Just jack but its all yours :)
I’d love your company
Felix
Okay,,, I can head over soon? If that’s alright
What’s your address
Chan types out his address with shaking hands. God, what was he going to want to do when he got here? Should Chan get a movie ready? Will he just wanna get straight into it? Chan blushes, realizing that all of his sexual experiences occured much drunker, in cars, or bathrooms, and despite not being the best were always, at least, not anxiety inducing. He had never even gone on a date with someone from Tinder, let alone text a stranger for two minutes and then invite him over to fuck, what the fuck. Chan did not know how this worked, at all. His phone buzzes again, shaking him out of his daze.
Felix
Thanks ;) i can be there in thirty
Oh also um
Sorry if this is weird but
Your fourth photo
That’s definitely you, right? That’s what you look like?
Chan furrows his eyebrows. All his photos were definitely him. He tapped on his own profile, trying to remember what photo Felix could be talking about, and-oh. Chan’s eyebrows shoot up into his hairline.
The fourth picture on his profile was one he had taken one night when he was feeling a little bit too confident. He’s leaning on the bathroom sink, shirt unbuttoned and harsh lighting striking each ridge in his abdomen. His head is cocked to the side, face mostly hidden by his phone, but the tiniest of smirks is visible in the dark photo. It’s a good photo, he admits. If Chan is self-deprecating about everything else, he knows he’s ripped.
Chan lets his face morph into a satisfied grin. So that’s why Felix swiped on him. He pulls up his t-shirt, revealing the expanse of his stomach and one pec, down to where his obliques form a sharp v into his waistband. The picture he snaps comes out sinful, gray sweatpants betraying the swell of his bulge, his abs a solid washboard, and most of all, he’s smiling mischievously, the glint in his eye betraying that he knew exactly what he was doing. Extremely satisfied, he sends the picture off to Felix.
Chan
Yea
This proof enough? ;)
Felix
Uh yeah sorry
Um see you in twenty?
Chan is disappointed Felix didn’t have any follow up questions, but immediately turns his attention towards getting ready. His apartment is fortunately not that messy, so he occupies himself gathering up some dishes on the coffee table, throwing some laundry in the hamper, and making his bed. He debates whether or not he should change his clothes, seeing as Felix already saw what he was wearing, and after a moment of indecision decides to put on a clean black t-shirt, but leave on his gray sweats for well, obvious reasons.
He spends the other five minutes sitting anxiously on his sofa, running through all the possibilities for the night. Maybe Felix didn’t want to sleep with him at all and Chan just really misread his signals. Maybe Felix is a serial killer. Maybe Chan had made this whole thing up in a complex delusion and Felix was actually, not real at all. Or maybe, a little voice in the back of Chan’s head whispered, Maybe he’s a boy who just really needs to get dicked down, and he thinks you’re hot? A spark of heat shoots into Chan’s crotch, but he doesn’t have long to think about that possibility for long, since his phone is buzzing in his lap.
Felix
I think I’m here
Can u let me in the building?
Chan rushes out into the hallway and practically leaps down the flight of stairs, slowing when he gets to the landing, and can see a slight, blonde figure dressed in black through the distorted glass door.
The door swings open, and there he is, a slim figure in a black jacket and skinny jeans. His blonde hair is different from his picture, is cut in blunt bangs across his forehead, and there are long tendrils Chan can see curling on the back of his neck. “Hi,” Chan manages through his shock that he’s actually here. “Felix?”
“Yeah,” the boy says in a deep voice that doesn’t entirely match his small frame. “Chan-ssi, right?” Chan nods, and Felix’s lips crack into a smile. “Nice to meet you. Can I come in?”
Chan was so taken by the slight smile, the plush lips sparkling with lip gloss and dark eyes smudged even darker with eyeshadow that he forgets how to speak, and just grunts, gesturing with his arm for Felix to enter. The other boy passes him, maybe a little bit closer than necessary, and Chan can feel the heat radiating off him, the smell of shampoo and cologne. “I’m up the stairs,” Chan gestures with a hand, and lets the other boy go first, definitely not so he can ogle his thin legs in the black denim. He’s at once exactly what Chan expected- a pretty boy with breathtakingly beautiful cheekbones and lips- and not- freckles faintly dotting a button nose, tiny hands cutely swallowed by his sleeves. It feels like a punch in the stomach.
Chan shuts the door behind him, and turns to see Felix examining the room, hands tucked into his pockets. “Sorry it's not much,” he apologizes instinctively.
Felix shakes his head and shoots another smile at Chan. “It’s perfect. I could kill for a little more privacy at home.”
Chan chuckles. “You live in a dorm, then huh? Sophomore?”
He’s taken aback when Felix blushes. “No, I’m a freshman actually.”
Chan quirks an eyebrow, and breathes out. “Freshman, huh.” He shook his head with a chuckle.
“There something wrong with that?” Felix sounds a little defensive, gravelly voice tinged with childish upset.
“No, no, not at all. I guess they make freshmen different now. We were all pimply dorks when I was a freshman. Nothing like the looks of you.” Felix blushes deeper, but Chan reflects on how much it wasn’t a lie- Felix puts everyone else at their college to shame, especially as he sheds his jacket and Chan can see he’s dressed in a translucent black shirt that rides up right above his waist band, betraying a pale strip of stomach.
“Oh. Well, I’m legal, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Felix says casually, his voice thrumming through Chan’s veins like a shot. He makes himself turn away.
“Yeah, said you were nineteen,” Chan responds absently, now searching for two matching glasses in his cabinet for their whiskey.
“Oh.”
Chan glances over, and Felix looks even more embarrassed now. “I may or may not be only eighteen.” Chan’s mouth falls open and quickly shuts it. Jesus. He’s not exactly sure what to say, goes to put his bottle of whiskey on the table, but falters, thinking about giving this kid alcohol and then doing unspeakable things to-
“You’re making me wonder if I should ask to see your ID, babe.” He jokes instead, gesturing to the couch for Felix to sit. A flash of something unrecognizable flits over his features at the word babe. He does sit, leaning elegantly to look at Chan, pouting.
“I promise. I’m almost nineteen too. I just signed up for Tinder when I was seventeen and set my age as eighteen, and I can’t get it back.” He cracks another devious smile and Chan can’t help but laugh, shaking his head in disapproval.
“Oh you’re bad, aren’t you?” he teases, no malice in his voice. He sets the whiskey bottle down on the table, figures they’re already here, may as well furnish this minor with alcohol. He regrets it immediately, as Felix takes it as a signal to snake an arm around Chan’s shoulders on the back of the couch, and narrow his eyes.
“You can find out if you want.”
Chan forcibly pulls his gaze away from the other boy’s lips and reaches for the bottle. “How about some whiskey first, kid.”
Felix pouts adorably, his lips even more pillowy. “Who’re you calling a kid, hyung? I’m old enough for everything that matters.” He accepted the glass Chan hands him, fingers wrapping around his own for a second too long. Chan shook his head and laughed to himself. He totally misjudged Felix as some aloof playboy out only for a hookup, but he was just an incredibly confident kid. Out for a hookup. He takes a sip of his whiskey to get that thought out of his head, relishing the burn down his throat. Still, sitting with him was such a bizarre mix of comfort and tension, like everytime he started to relax, Felix would say something dirty, or shift in a way where his shirt would ride up and Chan would be staring at the delectable milky skin of his torso. He sees Felix tip back the glass out of the corner of his eye, adam’s apple bobbing in throat. “I’m getting suspicious that you’re just using me for my alcohol, Felix.” He had sobered up a little in between his first bottle of soju and Felix arriving, but as the whiskey hit his veins he started feeling warm again, melty, a little bolder than before. “Oh no, not for your alcohol,” Felix says innocently, but as he speaks his hand snakes across Chan’s abdomen, feeling the soft ridges through his shirt, and he smirks at Chan again. Instinctively Chan reaches to hold Felix’s waist, thin and soft. A thought flits through his head, that he could probably wrap his hands all the way around Felix’s middle if he tried. “What for then?” His voice comes out low and crackly, so Felix would have to lean in to listen. He hummed, tracing a fingernail across Chan’s abs, shrugging a little. “You looked like you would fuck good.”
Chan inhales a little bit, and Felix’s lips twitch. He wasn’t sure what this game was that they were playing, and if he was winning or losing, but he knew it had to end. Fast. He pulls Felix by the waist to sit on his lap. He looks so light and long, sitting on Chan’s wide thighs, running a finger up his bicep, in a way that sends a tendril of heat into his crotch. “Do you,” he gritts through his teeth, “Make a habit of coming to strangers to get fucked?” Felix’s lips open in a catlike smile, and he leans close, his breath ghosting over Chan’s lips. “Only the ones that look as good as you, hyung. I couldn’t stop thinking about you after I saw that picture. You’re so big,” Felix gasps a little, palms running up Chan’s arms to his shoulders, leaving trails of heat. Chan tightens his grip, pulling Felix down closer to him, and he whines, head lolling off to one side. “I couldn’t help but imagine you throwing me around, hyung.” His whines fade into a whisper. Chan chokes out,, “God Felix,” swallowing a moan as Felix grinds his hips down into Chan’s lap. “You want me to throw you around? Hold you down? Pick you up like the little boy you are?” Chan’s eyes widen a little bit, unsure where this sudden lust came from, but Felix is groaning, his hands itching up under Chan’s shirt to scrabble at his muscles. “Yeah, yes please, hyung.” He draws out the last syllable in a low whine, and Chan decides that enough is enough. One hand grips the bottom of Felix’s thighs, and the other goes to wrap around his shoulders, and Chan stands up with a grunt, Felix gasping as he is lifted up into his arms. He laughs. “Yah, so whiny.” He carries Felix into the bedroom and launches him onto the bed, where he lands with a soft oof on the blankets.
“Sorry if this is rude,” Chan cringes at himself, “But where are you from? You have an accent.” Felix pushes himself onto his elbows. “Oh. I’m from Australia, actually, I just moved here a few months ago.” Chan thinks his mouth couldn’t gape any further open. “No way! I’m an Aussie too!” he says in English, letting his excitement shine. Felix laughs. “What are the odds,” he replies in English, grinning at Chan. “I’m surprised you didn’t ask when you heard my name.” Chan stops mid-chuckle, cocking his head, before he starts giggling again. “I didn’t even think about it.” Felix’s head drops back as he laughs, a full-bodied chortle. His jaw forms a sharp V at his chin, his throat making a smooth, pale line in his neck as he leans back.. Chan gulps a little. “Do you have an English name?” Felix asks, seeming genuinely curious. “Chris,” he answers. “Ahh, Chris-hyung,” Felix breathes out with a laugh. “It suits you,” he teases. Chan can’t help but smile. “No one’s called me that since high school. Why did you choose to go by Felix even after you moved here?” Felix shrugs. “My Korean name is Yongbok. It’s fine, I just thought Felix just sounds sexier,” he answers with a catlike grin. “Suits me better. Why do you go by Chan?” Chan shrugs too, stumped by his own question. “Maybe I should change it, let you call me Chris-hyung,” he says with a shit-eating grin. Felix responds with one of his own. “Mmmm, I like Chan-hyung,” he replies, back in Korean. “Is hotter, somehow.”
Chan’s mind was reeling, how he was so relaxed having this friendly conversation with Felix, casually like they were new friends, and yet the image of the other boy on his bed, lazily playing with the hem of his shirt, legs stretching in front of him, had him on edge, even more so with every little suggestive comment Felix made. Their laughter had died down, and Felix regards him with a look Chan couldn’t quite place. “You look like you want to eat me,” he says quietly, not shy but low, a secret between the two of them. He’s watching Chan, and something about the wanting look in his eye makes him step forward wordlessly to kneel on the bed, legs straddling Felix’s hips. His forearms come down to rest on either side of his head, boxing him in, trapped, and Chan dips his head to nuzzle right behind Felix’s ear, the short pieces of hair tickling his nose. He can feel Felix practically trembling as his lips ghosted over pale skin. “Maybe I do.”
Felix lets out a low groan. Chan can see his lithe body through his shirt, toned and muscular, but he pushes a hand up under the hem anyway, to feel his way along the ridges of his ribcage. “Off,” he demands, pushing up the material until it bunches under Felix’s arms. He expects Felix would laugh at him for the demand, but he just sits up wordlessly and tugged the shirt over his head before lying back down. His dark eyes are a little glassy, and his mouth slightly parted. He likes it. Ok, Chan thinks with a start. That is news. That is something Chan can work with.
With that information crashing into the sides of Chan’s brain, he focuses on running his fingertips down Felix’s sides, teasing out little hitches in his breath. He’s remarkably beautiful, all pale and smooth and laid out, fresh skin begging to be marked up. Chan voices his thoughts, and Felix huffs. “Hyung, if I’m so hot why won’t you touch me.” Chan narrows his eyes. “Tch, no patience.” Without another word, he bends down, attaching his teeth to Felix’s jaw.
Felix bucks off the sheets with a small cry. Chan is busy sucking a deep mark into the boy’s neck, and Felix’s hands pat uselessly over his arms and shoulders. “Hyungggg,” he whines helplessly. Chan can feel him straining at his tight jeans, a hard bulge in his pants he makes sure to graze over with his hips every once and a while. Chan shouldn’t tease too much though, he knows, since his own dick is hanging heavily in his sweatpants, making an obscene bulge in the material. He pulls away, satisfied with the deep reddish mark on his neck, and feels Felix’s fingers scrabbling along his waistband, pushing up the material of his t-shirt. Chan takes the hint, pulling his shirt up over the back of his neck. He can hear Felix let out a gasp. “Oh god, you’re even hotter than I thought,” he complains, and Chan grins. Despite himself, he knows he’s ripped. He lets Felix run his fingers up over his abs again, mouth forming soundless words. Chan palms the bulge in his pants, as Felix leans forward to plant the absolute cutest kiss right on Chan’s sternum. It makes him erupt in giggles. Felix scowls. “Is not fair, you look so good hyung,” he whines, and Chan shakes his head. “Not as good as you, Felix.” He cards a rough hand through the other boy's hair just to hear him make that little breathy gasping sound again. “I almost came when I saw you at my door. You look unreal.” Felix is pouting still, and Chan can see freckles underneath the makeup on his cheeks. “I almost can’t believe I’m going to be fucking you.”
At this, Felix sucks in a large breath, his big glassy eyes fixing on Chan’s smirk. “Yeah, yeah, you’re gonna look so good fucking me, hyung,” he stammers, and Chan takes the opportunity to unbutton his jeans, undo the zipper, and slowly peel the denim off Felix's legs. It’s a little clumsier than he hoped (those pants were much tighter than he thought) but with the other boy’s help they end up in a pile on the floor, leaving him almost naked, only clad in his tight black briefs that leave little to the imagination. Chan takes his time gripping the soft flesh of his thighs, watching his fingertips dig into the muscle, as the other boy mewls. Before he can go any further, Felix flips the two around, straddling Chan, and begins pressing kisses to Chan’s abs. He travels lower, looking every bit a man on a mission until he’s pressing open mouthed kisses along Chan’s v-line and-
“Hyung, I wanna suck your dick.” Chan’s eyes widen at the sudden request. God, it had been how long since he had a mouth on his dick? And it was Felix’s mouth, his pretty plush lips covered in pink lip gloss and oh god, how was Chan supposed to survive this?
“Yeah, yeah okay, you can do that, please,” he breathes out in a rush, and Felix beams, actually smiles joyfully, before nuzzling back into Chan’s hip. “Thank you, hyung,” he says, a little breathless.
Chan can’t even bring himself to speak before Felix is shimmying his sweatpants down over his ass, and before looking at them consideringly, pulls them off completely with a satisfied smirk. He runs his fingers up the inside of Chan’s thighs, reaching the edge of his boxers, and looking every bit like he might pass out from excitement, slowly pulls the waistband down over his pelvis. Felix actually lets out an audible moan when Chan’s dick comes free and springs up, standing hard and vertical. The sound makes his cock twitch obscenely, leaking out a single drop of sticky precum. Chan regards Felix’s open mouthed stare and pink cheeks, reaching a hand down to brush his hair out of his eyes. “You okay?” He asks, since Felix is starting to look a little catatonic. “Hyung,” he whines, “you’re huge.” He sounds like he might cry. “God, please, can I touch you? Please?” Chan lets out a bemused laugh. “Yeah, you can touch it.” He knew he was big, blessed by being both long and thick, but seeing Felix crouched down, eyes big with wonder and mouth gaping, he wonders if he underestimated his size a little bit. Felix wraps a tentative hand around his shaft, fingers not even close to wrapping all the way around, the visual burning into his eyelids and making him groan. He starts pumping slowly, pressing his thumb gently to the head and spreading precum down the shaft to slick the skin. Chan bites down on his lip, staring darkly down at the smaller boy in between his legs, but Felix is focused, mouth agape and fingers working faster now. It’s good, Chan tips his head back in a moan when Felix lets a glob of spit drop from his mouth onto his fist, where he can spread it over his shaft.
It’s so good, Chan thinks he might black out when Felix drops his head and closes his lips around the head of his cock. “Fuck,” he lets out with a sigh, willing his eyes to stay open, the visual of Felix’s pink lips stretched in an O around his length, his sharp cheeks hollowed and eyebrows furrowed, too tantalizing to ignore. His hands find the hair at the back of Felix’s head, who makes a small appreciative noise, and sinks further down. Chan loves the way they look, his muscled arm reaching down to run fingers through his hair, Felix’s slight fingers digging into his quads and his cheeks pink with exertion. That thought does nothing but add to the heat pooling in his stomach, the wet heat from Felix’s mouth, the slip of his tongue against the shaft, or the pressure when Felix suddenly pulls almost all the way off, to suck on the head of his dick, and look up at him through long black lashes.
“Shit, Felix, you’re so pretty,” he moans, gripping the hair at the base of his neck a little harder. Felix hums a little in response, sinks back down a little, and then stills, staring up at Chan with big eyes. They’re big and innocent, but they send a clear message, a challenge. Testing his theory, he rolls his hips a little, almost crying out at the way his dick disappears into Felix’s pink mouth. Felix whines, and immediately drops his hands from Chan’s thighs, as if he doesn’t want to hold him down. The small display of submission makes Chan groan, and he tries again, thrusting fluidly into his mouth, placing a second hand on the back of his head to keep him in place. This time, Felix moans loudly, the vibrations going straight to Chan’s gut and he curses, thrusts again, a little wilder, and again, fucking into the beautiful boy’s mouth. If he thought Felix looked good blowing him, he looks even better now, lips slick with spit and eyes dark and watery. Chan knows he’s going a bit too hard, can hear Felix splutter after an especially deep thrust, but can’t help himself, chasing the tension curling up in his stomach. Felix’s hands stay pliant at his sides, and he lets out a low moan, snaking a hand down to palm at the bulge in his briefs. Fuck. He speeds up a little despite himself, and Felix is making this guttural sound in between his moans, slipping a hand under his waistband, and fuck, Chan can’t believe he’s fucking the face of his incredibly beautiful Tinder hookup and he’s getting off on it. Chan’s abdomen is shiny with sweat now, glossy and flushed from his body heat. He feels his orgasm approaching, an intense wave of pressure and heat. Cursing, he pulls on Felix’s hair a little. “Stop,” he says unevenly, a bit more forcefully than he intended. Felix immediately pulls off, a string of spit hanging from his lip. He wipes it with the back of his hand and then sits back on his haunches, expectantly. Chan reflects that he did not expect this from a boy so bold to show up at his house in a see-through shirt, but something, something, judge a book by its cover?
Felix’s hair is mussed at the back from Chan’s mishandlings, and despite the debauched position they were just in, Chan can’t help but give him an affectionate smile. “God, you’re cute,” he says, voice betraying his fondness. Felix’s eyes narrow. “What, I’m not sexy anymore? I look cute sucking cock?” he complains. Chan tsks, running his hands up Felix’s thighs to grip his waist. “I think you’re too sexy for your own good. I’m having trouble controlling myself.” Felix scoffs, but Chan can hear that his voice is even more gravelly, a little more scratchy from abuse, hears him clear his throat softly before he speaks. “Maybe I don’t want you to control yourself,” he argues. His gaze travels up to meet Chan’s, and his lips part a little again, eyes darkening, all arrogance gone from his features. Chan wonders if his gaze is as predatory as he feels right now, wanting nothing but to hold the other boy down and absolutely devour him . “I bet,” he answers darkly.
They sit motionless, both waiting for the other to break the tension first.Chan’s mind is racing, thinking of all the things he wanted to do, and fuck this is way better than he thought his night was gonna go. Chan breaks the silence, shifting up into a sitting position. He taps his thighs. “Come here,” he says, less demanding but still a demand, and Felix complies, settling himself straddling his hyung’s hips. Chan isn’t really comfortable yet with ordering the younger boy around- something feels vaguely skeevy about that- but this he can do, and Felix seems to like being told what to do. His hands find the smooth surface of Felix’s ass, and he cups one cheek in each hand, fingers lecherously shifting to where thigh meets ass, the crease of flesh he most wants to sink his teeth into. “I’m gonna fuck you,” he says. “Just like you asked for, baby.” His lips lift in half a grin. Felix is back to looking arrogant, smudged dark makeup making him look like some kind of sexy Prince of Darkness spread over Chan’s thighs. He lays a hand on Chan’s chest with a devious smile, “Please, Chris-hyung.”
Chan laughs, but he’s started pushing Felix’s tight underwear down his hips. Felix shifts back to pull them all the way off, and then settles back on Chan’s lap. Chan instinctively reaches for his dick, pale and curved up towards his stomach, and gives it a few pumps just to hear Felix hiss through his teeth at the sensation. “You have a nice dick,” he says absently, regarding how pretty it was in his hand. Felix snorts. “You put me to shame though, man. Seriously, I don’t think I’m going to be walking tomorrow.” Chan laughs through his nose. “Ah, maybe. Is still pretty though.” Felix ducks his head at that, but not before Chan can see his cheeks heat up. “Let me prep you?” he says by way of changing the subject, and Felix visibly stiffens, nodding. “Yes please,” he replies, in that low tone in such contrast with the neediness in his voice.
First, Chan leans forward to suck a bruise just below the other boy’s collarbone, marveling in the careless way he tosses his head back, and the breathy groan that came from his mouth. Satisfied with his work, he leans over to his nightstand, fishing out the little bottle of lube he kept on hand just in case something like this were to happen. He’s a little embarrassed that the bottle is brand new, and he has to take the foil seal off, but if Felix thinks he’s lame, he takes pity on him, just smirking as he struggles with the packaging. “You’ve done this before, right?” Felix asks. Shit, he does think I’m lame. Chan pinks at the cheeks. “Yeah. Yes. I- not for a while.” Felix snickers. “Well, that much is obvious.” Chan smacks him gently on the thigh, making him jump and snicker even louder. “That’s mean. I’m your elder, I know what I’m doing.” He squirts a little of the lube onto his finger, rubbing them together to warm it up. He reaches in between his legs, and Felix helpfully shifts up, wrapping his arms around Chan’s neck so he has room to reach around. He’s rubbing wet circles around his rim when Felix responds in English, “Sorry, we don’t have ‘elders’ in Australia.” Punk . Chan rewards his insolence by nudging his middle finger just inside his hole, cutting off Felix’s low laughter with a gasp. He adjusts quickly, and Chan slowly presses in, until his knuckles are brushing up against his body. “I’m not a kid, you can go a little faster,” Felix complains. Chan shushes him. “You said you wanted me to take care of you, right? So let me take care of you.” Felix is silent for once. “Aish, you talk so much,” he teases. Felix lifts his head to glare at him. “Can I please have another, hyung?” he asks politely, voice dripping with sarcasm.
Chan answers by drawing out his finger, and then easing it back in, joined by a second. This time, he can see Felix react to the stretch, gripping Chan’s shoulders and carefully exhaling through his nose. Chan had never bottomed before, but with a partner like Felix he couldn’t help but wonder what kind of sensations he felt, to react in such a way. And- he thinks to himself- we’re not even at the good part yet. He slowly pumps the two fingers in and out, separating them a little to ease the stretch. Felix is just starting to get antsy when Chan twists his wrist a little bit, changing the angle of his fingers, and he jolts like he got an electric shock. “Fuck,” he breathes out, head dropping back on Chan’s shoulder, starting to grind a down onto his fingers. “More, please, hyung,” he pleads and Chan coos. “Ah, so polite. What a good boy.” Felix’s grumbling is interrupted when he arches off Chan’s chest, head thrown back in a primal groan. Chan is pumping his fingers a little faster now, brushing up against that spot inside Felix over and over, so he’s keening little ah, ah ’s in time to the thrusts. Chan takes a moment to congratulate himself on making this beautiful boy fall apart, even though it had been an embarrassingly long time since he fingered anyone. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t a little worried before, and Felix hadn’t just enormously boosted his ego. Carefully, he slips his third finger in next to the first two, just to see Felix’s Adam's apple bob up and down in the expanse of his neck, see him bite his wonderfully plump lips. He leans back, holding Chan’s eyes in his own, dark gaze, lips parting in a moan. “Fuck, Lix, “ Chan forces out, the tightness around his fingers making him imagine what he’s going to feel like in a minute, head feeling light at the thought. Felix goes limp, slumping back into Chan’s arm, slurring out nonsensical words. How suddenly my luck has changed, Chan thought, a funny feeling in his stomach. In a few hours, this night would be over, and Felix ( Chan hadn’t even thought to ask him for his surname, he remembers in pang of regret) would retreat out of his apartment with mussed hair and his giant fuzzy hoodie to never be seen again. As Chan watches him, Felix’s head bobbing in time to the gentle thrusts of his fingers, cheeks pink and freckled, lips wet and shiny with spit, an ache forms in his chest, realizing he would never get to experience this again.
Electrified by the thought, Chan eased his fingers out of the other boy, catching him when he slumped down onto his chest, breathing heavily. “How do you want-” the rest of the question hung in the air as Felix struggled to catch his breath. “I wanna,” he managed, “On my front, maybe?” Chan sees him lick the sweat off his upper lip, realizing that he hadn’t even kissed him yet, but maybe that was just how Felix did hookups? He hadn’t made any moves to kiss Chan after all, hadn’t looked like he wanted to, really, but…
Chan shakes his head a little to clear it, uncomfortable with the sudden swell of something in his chest, and grunts an agreement. Felix climbs off his lap, and Chan shifts so he can face the headboard on his knees. Felix is breathing heavily already, sweat slicking his back and shoulders. “Are you good?” he asks, worried, and the other boy’s head nods a little frantically. “It’s just a lot,” he confesses. “Sensitive, I guess.” Chan scrunches his eyebrows. He looks a little embarrassed. “Well, I don’t want you passing out on me. Here,” he says, grabbing a water bottle from his bedside table. “Take a little break, yeah?”
To his surprise, Felix nods, settling cross-legged on the bed, taking slow sips of the water. He looks so small , and Chan is struck again by that strange ache in his chest, but he quickly puts it out of his head, instead drinking in the sight of the other boy on his bed, faint light from the streetlamps outside casting beautiful shadows on his cheekbones. Willing himself to remember.
Felix coughs gently, and then screws the top back on the water bottle. His lips crack into a smirk. “Yah, hyung, no need to give me those big concerned puppy dog eyes,” he teases, making Chan laugh, hitting him gently on the thigh. “Punk. So I don’t want you to die, sue me.” Felix smirks again. “I’d much prefer if you fucked me to death, actually, instead of just sitting there making googly-eyes.” The ache dissipates from Chan’s chest, focusing again on his mission. He sits up, grabbing Felix's hips and pulling them back so he lands on his front on the bed. Expecting a protest, he’s a little surprised when the smaller boy lets out a whine. His fingers grip the sheets on either side of his head, whining getting louder when Chan presses a wide hand onto the middle of his back, making his ass arch higher into the air. He chuckles a little. “You’re really fun to fuck, you know that? You react like that to everything” Felix scowls. “So I’ve heard. You’ve yet to fuck me though, unfortunately.” Tsking at his impatience, Chan smooths over one side of his ass with one hand, grabbing a condom with the other. He smacks the side of it gently, just to see the other boy jump, and then lets go to rip open the little package and ease the condom onto his dick, throbbing with anticipation. He runs a hand over the small of his back, whether to soothe Felix or himself, he’s not sure. There’s an energy crackling in the air, making it hard for him to take a full breath. Chan tries anyway, shakily inhaling as he eases into Felix’s entrance.
The pressure is intense, so intense Chan thinks he might black out for not the first time tonight. He grips Felix’s hips, hard, trying to keep himself from simply ascending right there. Felix is breathing heavily, cheek smushed into a pillow. “God- hyung, I- you’re-” he lets out a frustrated breath. “So big, hyung.” Chan regards his face carefully, looking for any sign of pain. He has his eyebrows smooshed together, and is worrying his bottom lip with his teeth, but he cracks an eye open to peer back at Chan. “You can- move, please.”
Chan does, pushing carefully in, inch by inch, euphoria wrapping around his brain as his cock is wrapped in quite possibly the most glorious heat he’s ever felt. “God, you feel good,” he croaks, willing away the orgasm he can already feel warming up his entire body. “Yeah I do,” Felix whines, an attempt at arrogance, but it ends in a moan, Chan thrusting in fully to press his hips against him. He snickers. “You would be insufferable if you weren’t actually this hot, you know,” he reasons, starting to rock his hips in a gentle rhythm. “Are you saying I’m hot, hyung?” Felix asks innocently, but his face betrays him, eyes squinting and mouth turning into an O when Chan grinds a little harder into him. Chan huffs. “I’ve quite literally been saying that all night, babe. You still need to hear it some more?” Felix smiles, pleased. “Yes, please, hyung. Always.”
Chan curses, but a fond smile sets on his lips despite himself. “You’re absolutely gorgeous,” he breathes into Felix’s shoulder, relishing the small gasp that escapes his lips when Chan leans over to wrap his arms around his chest, changing the angle of his thrusts. Felix moans wantonly, going slack as the force of his thrusts drive his face into the sheets, absolutely pliant where Chan holds him up. Chan speeds up a little bit, grazing the other boy’s prostate at a punishing pace, soaking in the constant stream of moans and whines and cries of hyung and please and Chan, Channie-hyung, oh god . “So pretty, baby, good boy coming to let me take care of you.” Felix whines louder, and Chan takes it as his cue to pick up speed, slamming into the other boy hard enough the sound of skin on skin rings out loud in the silence of the apartment. Everything about it feels so dirty, the pace and force with which Chan plows his cock inside of the smaller boy, this kid he doesn’t know, fresh into college, who came here just to get dicked down by an older boy he thought looked like he would throw him around a little. The whole situation clogs up Chan’s mental abilities, and the endless stream of helpless sounds coming out of Felix’s mouth isn’t helping, only serving to make him feel light-headed, a little dumb, kind of fuck-drunk. So suddenly he startles even himself, he pulls out of the other boy, lifting him to sit upright. Felix’s eyes open in surprise. “You’re gonna ride me now,” he says, resisting the urge to say please or frame it as a question. He hopes that Felix can see in his eyes that its ok to refuse, and is suddenly self-conscious at his boldness, his lack of concern-
The effect is immediate. Felix draws up a quick, shaky breath, his arms trembling to hold himself up. “ Yes, hyung.” The words tumble out of his mouth, a little slurred, but he’s already turning around, crawling back into his hyung’s lap. His movements have a sense of desperation to them, a neediness that makes a shot of heat go straight to Chan’s groin. He takes a moment to adjust on the pillows, slick a little more lube onto his cock, and situate Felix’s knees on either side of his hips, before lining his head up with Felix’s entrance and easing inside again.
The position is so much better, since now Felix is facing him, and Chan can watch his face contort every time he drops himself, with shaking legs, onto his cock, watch as he cries out in pleasure every time Chan brushes against his prostate. He’s moving so carefully, yet so clumsily, trembling thighs struggling to lift his body up, over and over again. It’s almost painful, watching the other boy sweat and struggle to bounce on his dick, but he’s so mesmerized by the sight of Felix so needy, so wanting , to ride him until he can’t anymore, that Chan is frozen in place. He reaches up to brace himself against Chan’s shoulder, so unsteady to need his hands to push himself up.
Chan watches for a minute more, before deciding to take pity. “Here, let me, ” he says lowly, gripping Felix’s hips a little harder. With little more than a grunt, he picks the smaller boy up, lifting until just the head of his cock remains inside, before easing him back down, bottoming out gently. “ Oh, ” Felix gasps at the pressure, eyes popping open to meet Chan’s. His dark eyes are wide with awe as Chan lifts him easily again, then pushes him back down onto his cock, again, a slow and forceful rhythm.“Oh, fuck, I love it when you do that,” Felix moans, forehead dropping aginst Chan’s shoulders. Chan bites back a moan. “You love it when I manhandle you huh, makes you feel nice and small?” It’s part poor attempt at dirty talk, and part question- Chan could never understand the appeal, why some of his partners wanted him to throw them onto the bed, toss them around, carry them like a sack of potatoes. His mouth opens a little when Felix shakes his head. “I- ungghhhh- it’s so hot that you’re this strong, hyung. Wanna see you use these muscles.” Felix runs a hand down his chest, cupping one of his pecs, another hand trailing over his shoulder, the bulge of his trap.
Chan unconsciously drives Felix a little harder down into his lap, earning a low hnngh , trying to understand Felix’s answer. He didn’t know why it never occurred to him that he was the hot one.. Most of the time he just felt like a big oaf in bed, tossing around some skinny twink, but here Felix was, drooling in his lap, telling him he was hot, and that was an idea Chan would have to process. Later.
Felix grips his shoulder a little harder. “Why don’t you stop thinking and fuck me ?” he says through gritted teeth. Chan nods sheepishly. “Yeah, okay.”
The next time he brings Felix back down on his dick, it’s with such force that Felix arches off his chest, eyes rolling back into his head. “Oh, fuck yeah,” he breathes, hand trailing down towards his cock, swollen and red, bouncing against his stomach with every thrust. Chan bats his hand away unthinkingly. “Come just from me,” he says, and Felix groans. “Touch me, please?” he pleads, eyes staring imploringly into Chan’s. “You don’t need it,” he says simply, planting his feet into the bed and slamming his hips up into Felix. Felix falls forward again, babbling, face red and slicked with spit, “Hyung, ‘m so close, please, gonna cum-” He tightens impossibly around Chan, who groans with the added pressure, fucking up into him wildly, plowing so hard into the boy in his lap he’s afraid Felix’s head might go through the headboard. He’s gripping his hips with such strength he knows he’ll leave fingerprint shaped bruises, but can’t bring himself to care, focused only on the boy above him and making him feel good. Felix is slowly falling apart, words devolving into unintelligible cries into Chan’s shoulder, and with one final thrust, a God, hyung, I’m- he’s spilling onto to the ridges of Chan’s abdomen, warm cum seeping into the crevices of his muscles as he tenses up. He fucks Felix through his orgasm even when he collapses fully onto Chan’s chest, a warm, dead weight, keening softly as Chan’s pace becomes destructive, chasing the coil in his own stomach, breathing becoming heavy, as he slams inside the smaller boy continually, not slowing as he feels the wave of pleasure crashing down on him, biting down hard on Felix’s shoulder to stifle his shouts. Felix is crying softly, probably oversensitive but not resisting, letting the older boy use him, a thought that drives Chan over the edge. He shoots a hot stream of seed into the condom, the tightness around him milking out every drop, as he rocks shakily back inside, rhythm slowly until he sits still, cock twitching inside Felix’s pulsing hole.
They sit like that for a moment, chests beating against each other, heavy breaths heating the air around them. Chan feels a little dizzy as he comes down from the high of his orgasm, skin cooling down in the chilly air. “Well,” he says to break the silence. “That was pretty fucking amazing.” Felix snorts into his chest. “You’re a dork.” he says gruffly, but Chan is pleased to hear a note of affection in his voice. “You alright, though?” he asks him. Felix hasn’t moved since his orgasm, staying a limp doll resting on Chan’s chest. “‘M alright,” he says in a muffled voice. “Jus’ sticky.” Chan laughs. “Here, sit up.” Felix makes no attempt to do so, and Chan sighs, easing himself out of his entrance, before lifting him up, setting him upright against the headboard despite the other boy’s protests. With a pat to his head reassuring him he’d be right back, Chan heads to the bathroom, returning a minute later with a wet washcloth. He wipes Felix’s face first, trying to fix his makeup as much as possible, before wiping the residue of cum off his softening dick and the lube leaking out onto his thighs. There’s something so gentle about cleaning up Felix’s skin, it makes his stomach crawl up into his throat. He finishes up quickly and turns the cloth on himself, wiping Felix’s release out of the ridges on his abs, dutifully ignoring the way Felix’s cheeks pink in embarrassment. He’s struck by how quiet the room is all of a sudden, the cacophony of sex fading into something quiet, almost...tender? He offers Felix the water bottle again, watches him drink half of it in big gulps, sitting back on his heels, just watching, soaking in the last glimpses he would probably ever have of the younger boy. “Oi, why are you looking at me like that?” Felix asks, voice full of suspicion. Chan shakes his head gently. “No reason. Thanks for a good night.” Felix looks down, expression unreadable. “No need to thank me. I should be thanking you.” Chan hums noncommittally. “I don’t suppose- I mean- you probably don’t want to stay the night.” He can’t bring himself to look Felix in the face, see the look of disgust, or pity, or secondhand embarrassment, that’s probably passing over his features. He focuses instead on rubbing at a bruise on Felix’s thigh, where he grabbed him a little too hard. He wonders if Felix is going to go home and curse him for marking him up so much, or if he’ll stand in front of a mirror, pressing fingertips into the dark purple spots on his skin where Chan touched him.
Felix clears his throat softly. “No, I- I really would, hyung, but I told my roommates to wait up for me. They’ll be worried if I don’t come home.” He thinks Felix does sound a little wistful, genuinely apologetic, and lifts his head a little, his eyes connecting with Felix’s unbearably big and shining ones. He looks transformed, no longer the overconfident playboy who climbed into Chan’s lap. He looks more real, vulnerable, naked in Chan’s bed, almost sad to be rejecting him. Maybe that’s just two sides of the same coin , Chan thinks bitterly. Put on a show to get in my bed, put on a show to get out of it. “Okay,” Chan concedes softly, biting back his embarrassment and anger at the rejection. He couldn’t blame Felix for not wanting to stay, this was a hookup, not their honeymoon. If he wanted to spend the night cuddling, Chan should have asked him on a date, not given him whiskey and then fucked his brains out. “I hope you don’t mind if I say that I hope I see you again.”
“I don’t mind, hyung.” Felix responds, his voice even huskier than before. “I really do have to go.” Chan can let himself believe that, especially since Felix’s eyes are so shiny and dark, he can’t bring himself to accuse him of lying. “Okay, Lix,” he says with a soft smile. Felix returns it, and slides off the bed to get his clothes. Chan tries not to laugh at how Felix is hobbling like an old man to fetch his pants across the room, especially when Felix shoots him a glare. He dresses too quickly for Chan’s liking, smoothing a hand over his hair. He walks back over to Chan’s bed to pat him on the cheek, a soft smiling lighting his features.Chan wills him to linger there for a moment longer, for him to soak up as much of his sweet shampoo scent and the warmth of his small, soft hand. “I can let myself out. Thanks again, hyung. I hope I see you around.” It seems, for a moment, as Felix cups his jaw, that he might lean down to kiss him, but the moment is gone as fast as it arrives, and he backs up towards the door, waving his fingers as a goodbye before turning and shutting the door behind him, gone.
Chan flops back onto his sheets, trying desperately to organize his thoughts. When he fails in all regards to do that, he sighs instead, reaching for his phone. 1:40 AM. Three hours ago, he was sitting all lonely and self-pitying on his couch, and here he is, reeling from what was definitely the best sex he had ever had in all twenty-one years of his short life. And he’s still self-pitying, since the boy who texted him for a booty call wasn’t in love with him. How dumb can a big dumb oaf be.
After ten more minutes of wallowing, he forces himself up, pulling his sweatpants back on, not bothering with a shirt. He pads back out into the living room, eyes glued to the mindless scroll of his Twitter feed on his phone. “I was wondering when you’d appear.”
Chan jumps straight in the air, phone flying out of his hands to drop with a crack onto the wood floor. He swears. Hyunjin is lounging, long and catlike, on the sofa, eating popcorn with chopsticks out of the bag, still dressed in his party clothes, glitter in disarray on his eyelids. “Jesus fucking Christ, a little warning maybe?”
Hyunjin stops snickering to stuff another kernel in his mouth. “In my defense, I was waiting a long time for you to come out of your room. Your little boytoy left like fifteen minutes ago.” Chan feels the color drain from his face. “You saw him?” he asks in anguish. Hyunjin snickers again. “Yeah, poor kid looked like he could barely walk. And you wouldn’t even walk him to the door. You’re a monster, hyung,” he admonishes gleefully. Chan groans, collapses next to Hyunjin on the couch, hands over his face. “Seriously, if you didn’t want to go to the party because you had a booty call coming over, you should have just said so. He was hot, I would have understood.” Chan glares at Hyunjin through a gap in his fingers. “It was a bit last minute, if you couldn’t tell. And don’t call him hot,” he adds on as an afterthought. Hyunjin is grinning from ear to ear, clearly enjoying his torture. “Last minute my ass. I got home early and you were already loud enough to wake up the whole building.” Chan freezes, mortified, as Hyunjin begins a horrifyingly accurate impression of Felix’s moaning, gravelly voice. “ Oh please, hyung, yeah right there, you’re so fucking big and strong, hyung, oh godddddd,” he wails, ending by theatrically throwing his head back in a moan. Chan stares stone faced back at him. “If I had known you were listening to me having sex, I would have come out here and murdered you on the spot,” he deadpans. “Oh don’t get your panties in a twist. I put on headphones once it started ruining my appetite,” Hyunjin scoffs, but Chan knows he feels bad, is trying to make Chan feel better. He hmphs softly. Hyunjin sits up to rest shoulder-shoulder with him, the way they always do, to talk about uncomfortable things without looking at each other. It’s what they did when Chan first told Hyunjin he thought he might be gay in tenth grade, and when Hyunjin told Chan the same thing a year later. It’s how they sat, in comforting silence, when Chan cried to his best friend about how scared he was to leave home and go to university. The press of Hyunjin’s shoulders calmed him down a little, even if it didn’t slow the hurricane of thoughts running through his head. “How do you know him? I didn’t recognize him at all.” Chan shrugs. “I didn’t. He’s a freshman, I saw him on Tinder.” Hyunjin snorts into his popcorn. “You sick boy, preying on the freshies.” Chan glares at him again, stealing a handful of popcorn. “I didn’t know before he got here. Kids these days, I swear to god.” Hyunjin pats him gently on the shoulder. “There, there. I’m proud of you anyway.” He huffs out a laugh at Hyunjin’s attempt at comforting him. He still wasn’t entirely sure why he needed comforting, anyway. He still didn’t know exactly how to process what had happened.
He says goodnight to Hyunjin and retreats back into his room, slipping underneath the covers on his bed that smells vaguely of sex and boy and something else, a hint of Felix’s sweet smelling shampoo. His eyes close and he can’t shake the image of Felix’s parted mouth, big shiny eyes, smooth milky skin, from his vision.
His mind a jumbled mess of feelings, he mused over the fact that he had hookups before, none of which ended like this one. Something about Felix was so alluring, so intoxicating, he knew he wouldn’t be able to shake the memory from his head, as much as he knew he had to try.
After all, he didn’t know if he would ever see him again.