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Sirius sighed, buried under a mountain of blankets; the curtains around his bed shut tight with a spell. Around him he could hear the low hum of his friends deep in sleep, but he was finding it difficult to go to sleep.
His thoughts on the usual person but now said person had made a clean sweep from Hogwarts and with it, he had taken the Marauders reputation.
**
Severus Snape. It was his eyes.
His eyes were the darkest Sirius had ever seen; black but sparked with life and devotion if the way he looked at the re-haired girl was anything to go by.
That was the first thing he noticed about Severus Snape, the next things were his robes; they were old, so old Sirius wondered why he would wear them in public. Surely, those are not his school robes? He stared at the robes, before the voice of the black-haired boy got his attention again,
shocked when the black-haired boy declared he wanted to be in Slytherin.
Sirius Black had joined Hogwarts with the sole plan of not being in Slytherin, wanting nothing to be like his family. His joy at being sorted into Gryffindor of all houses was incomprehensible, he had proven he was nothing like them and surely everyone else who knew anything about Hogwarts knew Gryffindor was the house to be.
As much as he would rather have the boy closer, those eyes! He decided the boy must be inherently evil if he was volunteering for Slytherin.
He must be evil. Sirius rationalised; his thoughts backed up when the girl he was with got sorted into Gryffindor.
Makes sense, he nodded to himself; she looks like a Gryffindor. Her robes look like actual robes.
He sneered watching the boy get sorted into the pit of snakes, the look of relief he had nagged Sirius. He has to be bad, only people like my family get excited at getting sorted into that house.
That was the moment Sirius decided Snape was evil and deserved to be punished for it.
**
Sixteen-year-old Sirius Black sighed, thoughts lazily wondering while he waited for his friends to arrive. Every September 1st he was one of the first students to arrive on the platform and this year had been no different.
“This is going to be an amazing year.” He stretched, eager for his O.W.L.S year; temporarily pushing back the exams themselves, “too early to bother about that.”
He looked around the empty compartment once more, thinking of what to do while he waited, when something caught his attention on the platform.
It was Snape and he wasn’t alone. Malfoy, Sirius glared at the two snakes; of course, Snape came with Malfoy. “Death-eaters in the making” he murmured to himself. Still confused as to why Lily bothered with the slimy snake.
He knew why Snape wouldn’t leave her alone though, everyone knew he liked her, but Sirius wondered why the Slytherin even bothered. He was going up against James, he had no chance!
Well, Sirius was sure Snape liked Evans, it was one of the rumours he had gently pushed, and people flew with. Besides, what boy sticks to a girl he doesn’t like, like that? Sirius was so sure about Snape’s interest in Lily that his mind stopped at what he saw next.
A seventh year Ravenclaw boy with shoulder length hair passed the two Slytherins; the boy was muggleborn, where Sirius expected disgust from the two snakes, what he saw instead was…interest?
At the very least, the look Snape was giving the passing boy was certainly attraction; looking at him the way many girls and some boys watched Sirius himself. Malfoy on the other hand had noticed and Sirius was once again left confused; Malfoy didn’t look upset or irritated but amused. Like he was used to this; used to Snape checking out boys.
Because it’s nothing new! His mind supplied, this scene was obviously not a new one, if the way Malfoy whispered something to Snape and the younger Slytherin pinched him for it was anything to go by.
Sirius watched, surprised once again when Lucius groaned and mumbled something, clearly not bothered that a half-blood had dared to pinch him. And that was when Sirius heard Snape laugh for the first time; head thrown back, the watching Gryffindor’s heart skipped a beat. He had never heard anything so beautiful.
He has never laughed near me. I want to hear it again. So caught up in his thoughts he didn’t think to stay alert to the two Slytherins, as such he was too late in ducking out of their view when Malfoy spotted him and pointed out the Gryffindor to Snape.
Sirius watched, eager (he would deny this fact if anyone ever asked) to see Snape’s smile directed at him. All he got was a sharp prick in his chest when Snape’s smile disappeared once Malfoy pointed him out. Sirius expected a lot of reactions, he did not expect the resigned look when Snape looked his way.
That prick in his chest quickly turned into a stab, why is he looking at me like that?! Sirius expected anger not a resigned look. He watched as Snape flickered from resignation to irritation, sneering at the Gryffindor. Right, that’s better. Sirius thought, sneering back as he tried to ignore the painful pull in his heart.
**
Sirius had not told anyone about that day on the platform but he had not forgotten about it.
Sirius had watched the snake even closer after they got to school; refusing to believe he actually liked boys, because if Snape liked boys it meant no one stood in Prong’s way but most importantly Snape had no interest in him.
The Gryffindor paused in his musings, the heavy realisation left a bitter taste in his mouth.
“All this time, I just wanted his attention.” Sirius quietly admitted to himself.
Now the Slytherin was gone and Sirius was to blame.
“Damn it!”