Work Text:
An Imperial Prison facility in Werlyt
Valens: Looking at Gabriel's slumped, chained-up form. "Ah, there he is! My trophy! Proof like no other of my superiority to that scum, Baelsar! I brought the troublesome Eikon-slayer to heel where he failed!" Laughing maniacally while looking around at his gathered child servants/'wards', as well as a couple of nearby imperial prison guards. "And look at him now! So beaten and demoralized that he cannot even look his captor in the eye!"
Gabriel: Snoring.
Valens: "...what? Are you... asleep?"
Gabriel: Snoring.
Valens: Slaps Gabriel's face. "Wake up, vermin!"
Gabriel: Snoring.
Valens: Slaps Gabriel again. "You will learn to respect your betters! Now, wake up!"
Gabriel: Mumbles. "Ugh... five more minutes." Snoring again.
Valens: Snarling. "You disrespectful mongrel! You will show your rightful masters proper respect!"
Gabriel: Yawns. "Ugh, fine, fine, I'm up-" Notices his surroundings. "...this isn't my bed."
Valens: "Ah, finally, you acknowledge my authority. Good."
Gabriel: "Don't jump to conclusions. Who the fuck are you?"
Valens: "Show respect, cur! I am Legatus Valens van Varro of the proud Seventh Imperial Legion! And you will bow to my-"
Gabriel: "Right, right, bad guy of the week. Legatus, huh? What's your animal?"
Valens: "My... what?"
Gabriel: "Your animal. Imperial Legates all have silly animal titles, don't they? You know, like the Black Wolf and the White Raven?"
Valens: Aware that he's losing control of the conversation. "Well, I-"
Gabriel: "You seem like a weasel to me..." Eyes light up. "And your armor is pink! You're the Pink Weasel now!"
Valens: Sputters as the nearby prison guards start snickering. "You... YOU DARE...!?"
Gabriel: "What? Don't you like it? Your guards seem to." The guards suddenly stand up straight and pretend not to look.
Valens: Punches Gabriel in the face. "SILENCE!"
Gabriel: Bursts out laughing. “Is that the best you’ve got?!”
Valens: “YOU WILL BE SILENT!” Punches him again .
Gabriel: “I heard pureblood Garleans were the strongest and smartest of all races of men! This is just disappointing! Then again, I’ve only ever heard Garleans make that claim, so… chocoshit propaganda? Seriously, the Scions’ receptionist punches harder than you do, and she’s a Lalafell!”
Valens: Still ineffectually punching.
Gabriel: “Seriously, I never thought I’d be this bored by the guy trying to torture me! Is this how Zenos feels all the time? No wonder he’s nuts.”
Valens: Now just fuming. “Enough of this!” Waves a hand at the children. “Burn out the bad!”
Gabriel: Giggles at the hot poker touching his back. “What, are you trying to tickle me to death now…?” Looks behind him and sees the children holding hot pokers for the first time. Immediately stops smiling. “…are those children?”
Valens: “My children have learned to do as they are told. They have their father's love to motivate them.” Pats himself on the chest.
Gabriel: “...Fray?”
Esteem: Poofs into existence, causing every imperial present to jump back in shock and fear. “Mmm?”
Gabriel: “Sic him.”
Esteem: “Finally!” Pulls out Deathbringer, swings it to burst open Gabriel’s chains, beheads an approaching guard, and takes off after the already fleeing Valens .
Gabriel: Grabs the fallen guard’s gunblade and rams it through another one’s chest. Then looks back at the frightened children. “You all want to get out of here? Away from the creep?”
One of the children slowly walks over to him and nods .
Gabriel: “Excellent. Follow me!” Runs off down the hall, leading the children. Shortly later, he runs back up the hall and pulls a map of the prison off of one of the fallen imperial guards. “I have no idea how to get out of here.”
Meanwhile, on the upper floors, Valens is running for his life with Fray in hot pursuit.
Esteem: “So the Pink Weasel cannot even stand and fight like a real soldier! Unsurprising!” Nearby imperials snicker at the moniker as Valens begins to sweat. “I’ve made mincemeat out of worms like you a thousand times over, and I will a thousand times again when you are dead and forgotten!”
Valens: “This isn’t fair! Baelsar can’t have had to deal with this!”
Esteem: “This is about YOU, cur!” Plunges at Valens, cracking his armor. Valens topples to the ground, scrambling back on all fours.
Valens: “Please… mercy!”
Esteem: Puts a boot on Valens’s chest and stomping him on the ground. “To think Eorzea once feared this legion. How far it has fallen since the White Raven.” Raises Deathbringer. “Die now, Pink Weasel.” Valens brings his arms up to cover his face when Esteem is suddenly disintegrated by a sudden explosion. Valens looks up to see an officer in magitek armor, arrived in the nick of time.
Officer: “Sir, I regret to inform you that the prisoner known as the Warrior of Light has escaped the facility. We were forced to retreat after he cut down every soldier we sent against him. Again…”
Valens: “You incompetents!” Fear forgotten as he stands. “We already captured him once, how hard is it to hold one soldier? Send more conscripts against him! They’ll slow him down, at least!”
Officer: “Of course, of course…” Mutters under his breath. “Bloody Pink Weasel.”