Chapter Text
Like most teenagers Sunoo was looking forward to being an adult. Being able to drink, being able to vote, legally being able to call the shots in his own life without the permission of an adult, just being seen as not a kid anymore….Sunoo was ready for it. He wasn't ready however for all the unexpected changes the first year of his adulthood would bring.
The past few years had already monumentally changed his life in a good way of course. Leaving home, becoming a trainee, being on Iland and debuting with Enhypen as the idol he'd always dreamed of was all so amazing sometimes he had to step back and pinch himself to believe it was real. He was so happy to find that he lived with a group of friends he now considered to be his new family, his new pack.
One change he hadn't had to navigate was presenting. While he'd watched his group mates go through it, he hadn't changed at all. Heeseung had presented as an omega before Iland and Jay and Jake had both presented as alphas shortly after debut which had made things a little tense around the dorm, the added dynamic a bit of struggle when they were all still getting to know each other but they'd all adjusted well. Sunghoon and Jungwon were both confirmed betas and Niki being so young still was unpresented. That left Sunoo who was…..a beta? He supposed so. He should have already presented if he was going to and his whole family was betas so it made sense. He tried not to give it much thought; his secondary gender didn't really matter. But something about being a beta just didn't feel right.
If Sunoo was confused about his beta status it definitely didn't stop his hormones from being very present and causing havoc in his body. Particularly whenever he was around Niki. Sunoo was not prepared for the way his heart raced, his palms got clammy and he was jittery around the younger boy. He'd never really developed crushes on girls at school like everyone else in his younger years. Actually he'd never had crushes on any boys either so he'd not had to go through the mental debate about whether he was gay or not. He just didn't seem interested in all the crushes, kissing and dating drama everyone else was and just thought maybe that wouldn't be a big part of his life like everyone else. Probably for the best anyway as it could complicate his life as an idol.
Cue one Nishimura Niki into his life. At first Sunoo was so unaccustomed to the feeling he didn't even realize it was a crush. He just wanted to be around Niki all the time. He wanted all of his attention, he wanted to make him laugh and direct all his cute teasing toward him. He'd been secretly over the moon when Niki had become attached to him as well when they moved into the dorm going so far as to as to sleep in his bed every night. He pretended to be annoyed but he loved it. He loved Niki wanting to be with him, loved being held by him and feeling his warmth. He couldn't explain it; he just had this insatiable need to be around him all the time no matter what they were doing.
It took him months of this to realize what was going on because either he was slow or he didn't want to see it. It wasn't until they were filming the Fever MV that Sunoo could finally see it for what it was. Niki definitely didn't look like a little kid anymore and Sunoo was melting down inside. While Niki practiced his part Sunoo sat on the sideline imaging kissing him. It was the first time such a thought had occurred to him about Niki and the first time the thought of kissing anyone had made his body feel anything. He was embarrassed to be entertaining such thoughts about his best friend and in such a public place as if everyone could read his mind. And then as if he wasn't confused enough every time Niki grabbed his throat or exposed it toward the camera a burst of what could only be called desire flushed through him. He wanted desperately to know what Niki's scent would be once he presented and it was full and vibrant, imagined rubbing his face against Niki's neck and breathing it in until he was dizzy with it. Which was so inappropriate in so many ways….not only did it feel wrong to be thinking it in the first place, it was one of those very un-beta things he thought. He could smell others scents but weakly and their pheromones didn't affect him as a beta. So even if Niki presented as an omega or alpha he shouldn't be imagining getting such pleasure out of his scent.
Sunoo tried to shake off the incident but he couldn't. He liked Niki; he definitely had a crush on him. Once he accepted that he couldn't stop getting butterflies in his tummy every time they held hands or touched and he couldn't stop wanting to kiss him. He tried to make things normal but they just weren't. Almost as if Niki knew too he was acting differently around Sunoo now too. More hesitant and shy; Sunoo worried he'd somehow given away he liked him and made things awkward. He was too inexperienced to realize it was because Niki was getting feelings for him too.
The first time they kissed was on his birthday. They'd had to do a photo shoot for Ami that day but everyone had still made the day special for him. After work he'd shared a birthday dinner with the others before going home for presents and cake. Niki had asked Sunoo if he wanted to watch a movie so that's how they'd ended up as the last ones up, curled up in a blanket watching a movie too scary for the others to tolerate. Sunoo was way too warm but he wouldn't dream of getting out of the blanket; he loved being nestled up this close to his best friend and new crush. They'd finished the last of the cake and Sunoo was on a bit of a sugar high in addition to his normal giddiness around Niki now when Niki had shyly said, "I have another present for you I didn't give you yet."
"Oh? Let me see!" Sunoo said in excitement wondering why Niki hadn't just given it to him before.
Niki pulled something small out of his pocket and held it up. It was a cute, sparkly charm bracelet, the kind you made yourself, with alternating sun beads and heart beads.
"Put it on me?" Sunoo asked holding out his arm. He imagined Niki putting all the beads on it himself knowing he was going to give it to Sunoo and it warmed his heart.
" I love it" Sunoo said honestly as he admired the bracelet on his wrist. His skin felt warm where Niki's fingers had brushed his wrist putting it on.
"I had to use sunshines because well….you are sunshine" Niki admitted shyly. Sunoo could see him blush as he said it.
Sunoo's stomach was jumping with excitement almost as if his body sensed something was going to happen.
"And the hearts? What are they for?" Sunoo whispered quietly. His heart was racing as he turned his head and found Niki an inch from his face. Slowly, Niki reached over, his hand intertwining with Sunoo's. The excitement flooded through his body and he was blown away a moment later when Niki leaned in and kissed him. He felt so many things at once; his heart racing, his stomach jumping, his body flooding with adrenaline. Niki's lips were soft and sweet from icing and they fit perfectly together with Sunoo. His first kiss and it was amazing.
Sunoo had never felt so alive in his life. Even though Niki had initiated the whole thing the next day it seemed almost too good to be true to Sunoo. It took him awhile to believe that Niki actually liked him back. It took a few more days and a few more stolen kisses in the middle of the night, a whispered gasping confession from Niki said breathlessly between kisses, "I really like you, Sunoo" for Sunoo to actually believe that yes this was actually totally real.
Sunoo was living on a cloud mentally after that. The excitement of having his feelings returned, of getting to kiss Niki, of the little electric touches they would exchange now made Sunoo so blissfully happy nothing could bring him down.
Unsurprisingly their secret little romance didn't stay secret long. Either because they'd gotten more bold or desperate they'd begun to kiss more often and in more places one of which include the practice room, only to have all the others walk in while their lips were locked. Sunoo was surprised no one actually seemed shocked by this. In fact the general consensus was that they all kind of suspected the two liked each other. Another consensus was that they didn't seem to think it was serious with Jay saying plenty of idols messed around and Jungwon simply cautioning as a leader to only do that stuff at home so they didn't get caught.
So that's what they did. They were careful when they were out and about around others and saved all their kissing and mushiness for around the house much to the dismay of the others who were always walking in on them. As months passed the others began to slowly realize that maybe things were a little more serious than they thought when instead of getting tired of each other they only grew closer to each other.
Thing were great and Sunoo didn't have a single complaint of how things were going on in his life. It wasn't until they were closing in on their one year debut anniversary that certain things did change. It wasn't in how things were between he and Niki. They were as good as always; in fact if anything they were getting closer. While they'd always been close and affectionate, by that point Sunoo would almost call Niki's behavior toward him clingy. Not that he had any problem with that; he loved how Niki was getting more and more affectionate and wanted to spend more time with him. He selfishly even enjoyed how Niki would get jealous if one of the others were too close to him or being affectionate. Even though none of them meant anything by it of course Sunoo enjoyed Niki being a bit possessive about him. It was other things that were beginning to make them all think Niki was going through some changes. While Niki had always gotten along with his hyungs, lately he'd begun to argue with them quite a lot and over seemingly meaningless things, especially Jake and Jay. It wasn't like him to snap at them over tiny things like taking the seat he wanted in the car or jumping ahead him for the bathroom when he'd always looked up to them like older brothers. It also wasn't like him to be super emotional.
If anything Niki normally was the type to hold in his feelings or get quiet and reserved when he was upset. He didn't get truly upset that often but when he did it often took him a long time to switch gears. But now it wasn't uncommon for him to go from his playful, happy self to angry and sulky to overly affectionate in the span of a few minutes.
Jungwon, always perceptive of his members, was the first one to note that he thought Niki was getting close to presenting. It would easily explain his moodiness, clinginess and aggression, especially directed at the two alphas in the group. Sunoo didn't know why he hadn't seen it; it really was obvious. Niki didn't want to hear it though; whether because he was in denial of how his behavior had changed or because he was scared of the changes coming his way, he always got defensive and argued when it was brought up. So they all dropped it but kept a close eye on Niki.
One cold morning a few weeks later Sunoo woke up ready to get up and excited for the day. He was leaving to go visit his family and had been looking forward to it for a while and now it was finally here.
But almost instantly he sensed something wrong. Niki was dead asleep next to him, radiating heat like he had a fever, sweating so much the bed around him was damp. Sunoo felt a deep, instinctual feeling something was wrong but for some reason he pushed it out of his head.
Last night Niki had been quite unpleasant, snapping and getting aggressive about nearly everything. When he'd lost a game he'd been playing with Jake and ended up throwing his controller and actually taking a swing at Jake, Jungwon had stepped in, radiating calming vibes and ordered Niki to go to bed.
Surprising to everyone, Niki actually had stomped off and went to bed and no one have seen him the rest of the night. When Sunoo had gone to bed he was a bit surprised to see Niki in his own bed instead of Sunoo's as especially lately with how clinging he'd been, he'd been sleeping in Sunoo's a lot. Figuring Niki probably needed space especially with how aggressive he'd been Sunoo went to sleep alone in his bed. Sometime during the night Niki had awoken and gravitated toward him, clinging to Sunoo in his sleepy state.
Now, concerned about the heat radiating off Niki, Sunoo sat up in bed and shook him a bit. "Niki? Are you okay?" Sunoo asked tentatively.
Niki swatted his hand away whining. "I'm tired…leave me alone" Niki moaned before rolling away from Sunoo toward the wall and curling up in a ball.
Sunoo pulled his hand back but said, "You're burning up. Are you sick?"
"Go away!" Niki mumbled into the blankets. Feeling a bit stung Sunoo said, "Fine" in a huffy tone before rolling away from Niki and climbing out of bed. He didn't want to have a fight with Niki since he was leaving shortly and he knew if Niki was in one of his moods it was best to leave him alone. Sunoo just hoped he was over it by the time he left so he could get a goodbye hug and kiss.
Sunoo went to go take a shower and get dressed for the day returning to the bedroom afterwards to get his bags. By this time Niki was sitting up in bed, still looking sweaty and out of sorts. But instead of snapping at Sunoo as soon as he walked in Niki reached for him and whined, "Hyung….come back to bed."
He sounded so pitiful and sad Sunoo's heart instantly melted but he had to leave in 20 minutes and didn't have time to lie back down.
"Niki, I can't. I'm sorry. I'm leaving in a few minutes" Sunoo said softly, throwing a few more things in his bag.
"What? Leaving? You can't!" Niki said desperately. Sunoo was so shocked by his reaction he turned around and was startled to see a look of pain on Niki's face.
"I'm visiting my family; you knew that Niki. I've been talking about it for days" Sunoo said reasonably. He didn't know why Niki was having such an extreme reaction. He was only going to be gone a few days.
"Don't go! Please….don't leave me!" Niki whined. He scrambled off the bed and grabbed onto Sunoo's arm with a death grip. "Don't leave! "
Sunoo was beginning to get upset; Niki looked so distraught, his insides were burning with a deep need to wrap his arms around him and take away all of his pain. He didn't like feeling like he was leaving him upset or having to choose between him and his family.
"Please don't do this to me. It's not fair" Sunoo said, gently prying Niki's hand off his arm. "I need to go home. It's only going to be a few days."
Even though Sunoo was trying to reason with him Niki was clearly at a point he couldn't see reason. "I need you!" Niki whined desperately and Sunoo could see tears in his eyes. He was actually on the verge of crying. It was so unlike him to act like this Sunoo knew something was wrong.
Sunoo grabbed Niki's arm and gently led him to the bunk so they could sit down on the edge of it together. Sunoo wrapped his arm around Niki and pulled him close. Niki instantly dissolved against him, hands gripping his shirt, his face nuzzled in Sunoo's neck.
"What's going on Niki? Why are you so upset?" Sunoo asked gently. He tried not up shiver from the tickling feel of Niki breathing against his neck so fast, panting almost.
"I just need you. I just feel like I won't be okay if you leave" Niki said quietly. He held on tighter, curling up almost as if he wanted to climb in Sunoo's lap.
Sunoo's heart hurt; he was so pitiful he nearly had convinced Sunoo to stay. But he couldn't; he knew how disappointed his family would be if he just didn't come.
"I have to leave; it wouldn't be fair to my family if I didn't come" Sunoo said. He reached a hand up and ran his hand through Niki's sweaty hair. "You'll be okay though. All your other hyungs will be here; you'll be fine."
"Don't need them; need you" Niki said, rubbing his face against Sunoo's neck.
Sunoo felt a whole body shudder go through him as he felt Niki's lips brush against his neck. Lately things had started to get a bit more heated between them. More kissing, kissing in places other than their lips, more touching….Sunoo wanted desperately for Niki to start kissing him there, wanted it so badly he was shaking a bit. But he knew how easy it was to get carried away making out and he literally didn't have time for this even though he wanted it. Even so he couldn't help but ask, "Why? Why do you need me?"
"Something inside me just needs you" Niki whispered, breathing more hot breath against Sunoo's neck and making him feel fuzzy with need. Some rational part of him still must have existed because Sunoo was able to gently detach himself from Niki. He whined but Sunoo gave him a brightly smile he didn't feel.
"You'll be fine Niki. You can call me as much as you need to and I'll be back in a few days" Sunoo said, his heart hammering in his chest. He gave Niki a kiss on the cheek because he didn't trust himself to do anything more and got up get his stuff.
Leaving proved to be painful. Niki got upset again to the point Sunghoon and Jungwon had to actually hold him back so Sunoo could leave. Niki was whining and reaching for him like a child not wanting to leave their mother at school and it broke his heart. He tried to tell himself it was fine and tried to put it out of his mind.
He spent a nice evening with his family but the texts he'd sent Niki went unanswered and worry began to grow deep inside his heart. He'd been so upset when Sunoo left that to not hear anything from him made him worry.
When Jungwon called him late in the evening Sunoo knew something was up.
"Jungwon? What's up?" Sunoo asked as he picked up the phone, his stomach a little jumpy at nerves.
"Sorry to bother you when you're at home" Jungwon said, "I just figured you were probably were worried about Niki and wanted you to know why he hasn't messaged you."
Before Sunoo could work himself up thinking worst case scenarios Jungwon continued. "It's not really any surprise but Niki presented a few hours after you left. He's going through his first rut right now."
It did make sense; all the signs were there even though Sunoo had been avoiding them for some reason. He hadn't realized until that moment that deep down inside he secretly had been hoping Niki would be a beta like him. He knew it wasn't that big of a deal; he knew things between him and Niki wouldn't change now that he was an alpha but that didn't stop him from worrying still. Alphas tended to be attracted to omegas, not betas like him.
"Is he okay? I hate I had to leave him at a time like this" Sunoo said with concern.
"Don't worry about it" Jungwon assured him. "Even if you were here there's nothing you could have really done for him. Jake and Jay explained everything to him and got him settled in the rut room. In a couple of days he'll be back to his old self. You enjoy your time with your family; we'll all be looking after Niki."
Sunoo did enjoy the visit with his family but his concern for Niki was always in the back of his mind. He knew going through a rut or heat alone could be quite painful and he hated to think of Niki in pain and alone. He kept reliving the sad, lost, scared look on Niki's face before he left and it made him long to see him again.
When Sunoo arrived back home a few days later he felt unduly nervous. He wasn't sure why; it was just in the back of his mind he felt things might have changed between them. His hands were sweaty and his heart racing as he walked into their dorm.
He didn't know what he'd been expecting; it wasn't as if Niki was going to have changed. But still somehow he was a bit surprised when he walked into the kitchen where they were all having dinner and he saw Niki sitting there looking happy and like his old self. When Niki looked up and noticed him standing there, his face lit up. "Sunoo! You're back!" Niki enthused before jumping up and running over to Sunoo and throwing his arms around him in a tight hug. Instantly all of Sunoo's worries that things would be somehow weird or different faded away. Niki's arms felt just as warm and comforting and safe as they always had as Niki whispered "I'm glad you're home, hyung" and gave him a kiss on his cheek.
Warmth and love spread through Sunoo's heart as he hugged Niki tighter. "Me too" Sunoo said, letting his head rest ever so slightly on Niki's shoulder.
It was then that Sunoo became aware of the most wonderful smell he thought he'd ever smelled. It was like fresh cut grass and wildflowers, somehow the essence of a perfect summer day in a way he couldn't quite describe. Turning his head slightly toward Niki's neck the smell got stronger.
"Is that wonderful smell you?" Sunoo asked before he could stop himself. He wasn't used to this; while he could smell the others scents they were always a bit muted and faint. No one's had ever been this strong or intoxicating.
Niki laughed a bit self-consciously. "Um…I guess?" He said, his cheeks flushing. "You like it?"
"I love it" Sunoo enthused, taking a big sniff, his head going fuzzy with how good it smelled, sending warmth through his body.
He had kind of forgot the others were there and he should be embarrassed until he heard Jay's voice behind Niki at the table.
"If you guys are going to start making out or something go do it in the other room. Some of us are trying to eat" Jay teased, causing everyone else to laugh. They all knew how enthusiastic the two were but that didn't stop Sunoo from being embarrassed at how he'd been sniffing Niki in such a very un-beta way.
They looked shyly at each other, blushing from the others attention when Niki said, "Here sit with us and tell us about your trip" Niki said taking his hand and leading Sunoo over to the table. Sunoo's hand felt warm, perfect in Niki's as he led him over to the table. As he settled down at the table and began sharing about his trip home, Sunoo felt his worried begin to disparate. He'd been worried about nothing. Everything was fine; everything was just the same as it always had been with maybe a few minor changes due to Niki's status as an alpha. Honestly, it was probably just as well he was a beta because he was already so drawn to Niki he didn't need pheromones and everything to complicate things.