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The drive was quiet on the way to the cabins, Neil stared out the window while Andrew played music softly, it was calm, in a way they were both getting more and more used to these days. Neither of them felt the need to break the quiet, no they were just with each other. Andrew was willing to say he was content, a small voice in the back of his mind niggled at him that he was probably happy. The glow of the sun setting lighting up Neil’s hair as he stared at the world flying past the maserati was almost distracting enough to pull Andrew’s eyes away from the road for too long. He was lucky that his self control was still impeccable. He was also lucky that even being late November on the way to the mountains it wasn’t cold enough for there to be any ice on the roads, the cold was oppressive enough to make everything feel distant though. He liked days like this, he was able to admit to himself that there were things he liked. The list seemed to be ever growing, much to Bee and Neil’s delight and much to his own contentment as well.
They pulled off at a grocery store, they would be the first to arrive, the other foxes flying in later that night, so Neil had decided that they would cook dinner together for the group. Andrew couldn't really bring himself to complain, afterall it would just be keeping with routine. They cooked together every night these days. Neil had decided that a pasta bake would be the best option so they made their way through the aisles getting what they needed, hands bumping together every once in a while until Andrew gave up on all pretense and grabbed Neil’s hand. The store was cold but Neil, who always burned about 2 degrees warmer than anyone else, was warm in a way that Andrew could feel filling him from that point of contact all the way to his toes. He looked over at Neil who was doing nothing to hide the fact that he was staring and wondered if he felt it too. From the way Neil’s eyes looked like melted ice, Andrew deduced that he probably did. Holding hands in a grocery store in the middle of nowhere, another thing to add to the list.
They disconnected to ring up the groceries and Andrew felt colder than he had to begin with at the lack of contact. Once they were back in the car he reached out his hand again and Neil took it without comment. He was good that way, never commenting when Andrew knew he was being what someone might call needy. The rest of the drive passed quietly, the traffic almost nonexistent with no holidays close by. The foxes made sure to never do anything until after thanksgiving and long enough before christmas that no one would miss out on seeing their other families if they had them. It was strange, how this had been something Neil had originally had to ask Andrew to go to, and now it was something Andrew almost looked forward to. The foxes were loud and obnoxious and often rude, but they mattered to Neil and so, they had started to matter to Andrew as well.
The cabin was beautiful, Andrew thought to himself as Neil got their bags from the boot of the car, straight out of a dream of a child who had been far happier than he had been. A huge window to the kitchen right next to the front steps, allowing anyone who had come up the driveway a view in. When he was younger Andrew knew Neil would have hated that, but now, looking at him, he just looked content. Andrew felt the final part of himself settling as he made his way up the stairs and unlocked the door with the keys that were in the lockbox next to it. The cabin was also warm, cozy in a way that was surprising considering how large it had to be to fit all the foxes and their partners. Andrew could say now that he was looking forward to seeing Aaron and Nicky and even Katelyn and Erik, it had been a long time since he had felt animosity toward any of them, but right now as he watched the glint in Nei’s eye as he immediately snagged the master bedroom knowing Allison and Nicky would complain later, he was happy it was just the two of them, if only for a couple more hours.
They sat in their room for a while, Andrew reading and Neil’s head resting on his legs while he looked through the latest Exy news. Andrew found himself stroking Neil’s hair as was habit these days until he could see Neil’s eyes starting to flutter as he fought off sleep. Checking his watch he realised that the rest of the Foxes would be arriving in an hour, pulling a sleepy and grumbling Neil up he dragged him softly to the kitchen so they could begin to prepare dinner, knowing it would take slightly longer since neither of them had bothered to check where anything was in the kitchen. They didn’t speak too much while they chopped up the chicken and mushrooms they would be adding to the bake (one of the few vegetables Neil would eat and one of the few proteins Andrew could stomach), once the bake was in the oven, Neil started on the salad that Kevin would bitch about if it didn’t exist and Andrew put on some music for them to listen to and set up the dining room. Once the table had been set and the salad was ready to be dressed and served, they waited for the timer to go off. Neil was humming softly to the music as he leaned against the counter, eyes closed and Andrew… Andrew wanted to be holding him. To his inner delight and still even after all these years, slight shock, he remembered that he could, this was something he could have now. So he walked over to Neil and rested his hands on his waist, Neils hands immediately wrapping around his shoulder as they just held each other.
The music Andrew had put on earlier still played softly and he realised Neil was swaying to it without even realising he was doing it. Slowly, Andrew joined, Neil freezing for a moment and opening his eyes before smiling so softly it would be shocking for someone who didn’t know him. For all their hard edges, they managed to create softness between the two of them, something even those who knew them the best would probably be surprised at. As they swayed together in the kitchen softly, relaxed and calm, Andrew had, not for the first time and probably not for the last time, the realisation that there was nowhere else in the world he would want to be than here, holding Neil in his arms. They weren’t perfect, they were human, life was never perfect but right now, right now everything felt perfect.
The van they had rented pulled up the driveway and Nicky could honestly say he was the most exhausted he had ever been in his life. They had all planned their flights so they would all arrive at around the same time so they could drive together, Neil and Andrew, as per usual, had opted to drive and would arrive before them. Nicky groaned softly as he pulled himself out of the car, grabbing his and Erik’s bags. He turned to speak to Aaron only to see him frozen staring at something to Nicky’s left, in fact every fox seemed to be frozen. Nicky turned and froze with them.
If you had asked him not even five seconds ago what he imagined walking into when someone said Andrew and Neil arrived first it would be a meal and the two of them sitting on the couches maybe. What you could never have got him to even imagine was through the window of the cabin into the kitchen they could all see his cousin and Neil standing so close together you could hardly tell who was who but the shocking part wasn’t the hugging, no it wasn’t even the fact that the two of them were swaying softly as they slow danced their way around the kitchen. The most shocking part to Nicky, the part that had him covering his mouth softly and Aaron frozen staring, was the fact that they could see Andrew’s face. Andrew, who was better but still struggled to lose his blank facade around anyone other than Neil apparently, Andrew, his cousin who he loved more than anything, was smiling softly, his head leaned against Neil’s shoulder and his eyes closed. He felt Erik’s arm come around his waist and the tears he hadn’t even realised were forming, fell.
Nicky had never expected anything from his cousins when he took them in but he had hoped, more than anything, he could make them happy or at least live long enough to see them become happy. He had seen it in Aaron and he had felt it with Andrew, as they got older, but this, he looked over at Aaron to see his face was almost as soft as it was when he looked at Katelyn before drawing his eyes back to the love he could see in front of him, this was more than he could ever have imagine or hoped for.
Later they would pull themselves from their stupor and they would make loud noises to alert the boys to their arrival, they would enter the house and pretend they hadn’t seen anything. But they would also see the way Andrew and Neil’s eyes never seemed to leave each other for long, the way they wouldn’t speak but they would lean against each other until it was time for bed and Andrew would help a still half asleep Neil up the stairs to their room that neither Nicky nor Allison had really had the heart to argue with them about and as Nicky went to sleep that night, his husband holding him and his whole family in the same house, he realised he could finally admit to himself that they had all made it, and that, that was enough.