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English
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Published:
2015-05-08
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1/1
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We Didn't Bake a Cake So We Knew You Were Coming

Summary:

Serenity crewmembers discover better living through technology.

Work Text:

You wouldn't want to mix them up, germs and all, and at first Kaylee thought Inara might have them color-coded. She heard some folks did that with their dishes—different ones for meat and milk. And Kaylee had been using different-colored wire caps since she wasn't knee-high to a grasshopper.

Turned out, though, the shapes were so different you couldn't make a mistake even if you'd tried. One of them looked sort of but not exactly like a cock—they took the chance to make some improvements in design, as well as adding an attractive Blue Willow pattern. The other one was more of a butterfly, two wings of bronzy rose, that slipped together and hinged in the middle (all articulated for the naked!).

Kaylee walked into Inara's shuttle. She pushed a hand through her hair, which was all she could do at that late stage to fix herself up. Inara wore a robe, where the silk was all the same color, you'd have to figure out the design by feel, and the facings were velvet. Kaylee wasn't sure in her own mind if the color was real dark red or real dark orange. The robe was held together by a strict belt, high around her ribs, giving the impression that Inara didn't mind being squeezed tight. Maybe even hurt a little, if it was in a classy way. Good to know.

It was a pretty good guess that Simon wasn't wearing anything; he was face-down on the bed, with folds of a dark-blue sheet clinging below where he definitely wasn't wearing a shirt. A full-length three-panel mirror was set up at one side of the bed, a folding campaign chair at the other side.

Kaylee hugged Inara, and pulled at the clip so Inara's hair ran free. Inara kissed her, and slid a hand down to cup Kaylee's ass. Kaylee dipped her head to nestle into Inara's neck. Inara wasn't wearing earrings, which made her look really naked, from that angle. Inara opened the bottom zip of Kaylee's coveralls, glad that there were no panties to cause a logistical problem. She curled her hand around Kaylee's vulva, patting and squeezing a little, letting her middle finger curl between the hemispheres. "I won't try to get you off just yet—just give you a soft smile to amplify the sensations."

Kaylee's golden-brown hair was just as nature made it (and some of it fizzed under her arms). . Kaylee slid her hand inside Inara's robe, enjoying the contrast of the velvety rectangle of cropped hair (dyed a matte blue-black) and the smooth shaved skin leading up to the crease of Inara's thigh. "Well, if this ain't a teddy bear cozyin' up to a greyhound," Kaylee whispered, "Gotta be some kind of unnatural sin," and Inara laughed.

Simon was propped up on his hands, looking into the mirror, with the pleased expectancy of a kid on Christmas Eve in front of a tree where lots of presents were heaped, glad to wait until the reveal as he enjoyed the suspense.

Inara pushed Kaylee's coveralls off her shoulders, and started rolling up the thin jersey top she wore underneath. "Uhh…leave that," Kaylee said. "I thought about it, and it'll look less…weird…if I get back dressed."

That certainly wasn't the weirdest thing Inara ever heard anybody ask, so she helped Kaylee with the harness, and smoothed the coveralls back in place. "Well, damn!" Kaylee said, looking at her new profile in the mirror.

The surface of the toy looked like porcelain, but it was slicker, almost as warm as flesh and already slippery. "Do we gotta put stuff on it?" Kaylee asked, then craning her neck to reassure Simon. "Don't want to hurt you."

"It's self-lubricating," Inara said, whisking away the sheet and pouring some oil on Simon's back from a small brass pitcher.

"It's actually kind of interesting how that works," Simon said. "A practical application of phase-change polymer chemistry…"

Inara cleared her throat. The lid of the pitcher clicked. "But you might want to use a little oil just to get started…"

"Are you ready?" Kaylee whispered, and one of the people to whom it might have been directed said, "I'm two-part epoxy in your hands. I've been ready since you two thought this up," Simon said.

Kaylee knelt on the bed, and swirled her fingers in the pool. Simon's skin was smooth and her hand almost skidded even on the part without the oil, like black ice only backwards inside a mirror. He moaned a little, took a bite of the pillowcase, and reminded himself that even high-thread-count sheets make your teeth ache.

Kaylee leaned back a little, and approved of how solid Simon's ass felt underneath her hands. She smacked him once, just to hear the ring, and he gasped. Kaylee noticed that distantly—like a guitar you might find, dusty in a corner of an old attic, and pluck a string just to hear the low note shuddering out. Then put it aside, because you didn't know how to play the gorram thing anyway.

The cloth of the coveralls felt…thick, or big somehow. Kaylee squeezed her knees against Simon's thighs, and pushed in a little—he pushed back—and felt the pressure spread back against her clit, and the strap stroking her opened lips.

A little later, she stopped, a little worried that she might have been so mad at Simon for making her wait so long that she wanted to fuck him in the bad way. "Was that too hard?" she asked. He couldn't get his head around far enough to look at her, so he told the mirror, "Really not."

Inara put one knee on the edge of the bed, so her robe fell open. Simon clutched the sheet with one hand, and twisted a fold of Inara's robe in his other hand. He arched his back until he could sink his face between Inara's legs—first criss-crossing his tongue messily, like lacing up a corset in the dark, then more and more precise and pointed verticals.

Inara hooped her arms over her head the way River called "high fifth," pulled Kaylee toward her, and kissed her. Then Inara ran her hands down to clasp Kaylee's arms, and Kaylee felt all the electrics go crazy—like a lightning storm. Simon (the only person who was in a position to be heard groaning) sounding like the foghorn.

Next thing Kaylee noticed, she was naked (except for one sock that got lost in the scrimmage), and Simon was holding her and nuzzling her neck. Inara put the strap-on in the toy washer and poured in an entire reckless bottle of distilled water. Simon rolled the robe down from her shoulders, until it caught in the belt and pressed her arms against her sides.

They turned Kaylee until she was lying on her back, each one kissing a breast. Simon, who had a lot of respect for professionalism, emulated what, as best he could tell, Inara was doing. When Kaylee had her feet planted on the bed, her hips tilting like a porch glider, Inara said, "Simon…I think it's time for Kaylee and me now."

Simon poured backwards, onto the chair, his legs sprawled to a capital M. Reflexively, he reached his hand to his lap, then it bounced away, he was still fizzing too fast to touch.

"What do we do with this one?" Kaylee asked, looking over at the night table. Turned out that one part went inside her, one inside Inara, and the butterfly-horn things on top pressed against their clits, and they could see-saw just a little, lying side by side, kissing, without using much energy which was good because Kaylee didn't think she had much left.

Eventually, Simon got his second wind, and started at the bottom of the bed, kissing the entwined toes and insteps, wrapping and unwrapping Inara's robe around the two women, stroking Inara's thighs, and leaning over to kiss Kaylee.

"Okay, everybody!" Kaylee said. "Not any more! I'm all wrung out!" Inara lit a stick of incense—formulated to last long enough for several rounds of chanting for her, and a catnap for her companions. Kaylee woke up with a start. "That was some party," she said.

"Sometimes handmade presents are the best," Simon said.

"We did think about playing with warm candle wax dripping, even whiter than your skin…" Inara said, her voice a low rumble against Kaylee's neck.

"…but we didn't have a cake," Simon said.

"It's sort of weird having part of you inside somebody else," Kaylee said, retrieving her other boot (upside-down on top of the drinks cabinet). "I mean, sure, my fingers inside 'Nara, but then I'm used to figuring stuff out with my hands anyway."

"It really is," Simon said. "But…it's good! It's like gathering a million data points of happy information."

Inara kissed Kaylee's forehead, took a last nibble at her ear, and said, "You'd better make your escape now!" she said "Before anyone gets suspicious!"

"Now, what was that you said about that polymer stuff?" Kaylee asked Simon, a perfect topic for crossing from the shuttle looking as if they hadn't been doing what they were doing. "If it's not too expensive, it might be a good thing for the stress decouplers—hard to reach 'em for maintenance, but if they get too dry they burn out…"