Actions

Work Header

A Kind-Sorta-Not Really Child

Summary:

"-Fine, but I want his fucking mask!" Ender eyes snapped open at Tommy's voice, and his head snapping to look at the pouting teen, who sneered at him when he noticed him staring. "I want to smash it so I never have to see it again!"
~~~~~
Dream was just supposed to end up in prison, not have his biggest secret exposed because Tommy wanted something to lord over him!

(Takes place when they are about to take Dream to Prison. Canon Divergence. Kind of a parody to those: Dream is actually a child fanfictions.)
Warning: Cussing

Notes:

I was reading a bunch of those "oh it turns out Dream was a kid" fan fictions and while I don't necessarily have anything against them, I thought a few of them were really funny and I decided to kind of make this as a parody of those stories I guess?

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

All the hard work, all the planning, all the heartache was finally coming to an end. Dream was going to be put away, and the SMP will be peaceful again, just as it was meant to be. In a way he as sad, because it meant he was never going to see his friends again, or the sky, or feel the waves, or talk to the parrots, or-He closed his eyes to push away the regret. Because he did regret it, all of it. The wars, exile, but it was the only way he knew how to fix things. He was tired, tired of fighting, he just wanted to be taken to his cell and finally sleep for a few years. That sounded nic-

"-Fine, but I want his fucking mask!" Ender eyes snapped open at Tommy's voice, his head snapping to look at the pouting teen, who sneered at him when he noticed him staring. "I want to smash it so I never have to see it again!"

The gathered group fell silent for a moment, before there was nodding. No one had ever understood his mask, but he never took it off in front of anyone, not George, not Sapnap, Not Bad, not even Techno. They were curious, but they also wanted to give Tommy some closure, and it wasn't like Dream would need it locked away. "Alright Tommy." Sam sighed, tightening his grip on Dream's arms, which were folded behind his back.

For the first time that night Dream started to struggle. "Don't take it off!" He growled, kicking his legs up in an attempt to kick the teenager away from him. Sapnap grabbed hold of his left leg, motioning to Punz grab the right, but the blonde just held up his hand, causing the Blaze Hybrid to growl, so Quakily stepped forward to hold his other leg down. "Come on guys, don't take it away from me! Get away from me!" He tried pulling his arms away from Sam, but Ponk wrapped another hand around his arms, helping Sam keep his hold. Tommy grasped the sides of his mask, and started to pull. "Please! Please don't take it! PLEASE-"

snap

The mask's straps snapped, and the mask was removed. Tommy puffed his chest as he stood to full height. He looked down at Dream, wanting the blonde man to watch as he stupid mask was destroyed. Except his self satisfied smirk melted into a 0 shape, with his eyes bugging wide at the scene before him. The people holding Dream suddenly dropped him and stepped away. A shimmering purple and white glow overtook the 6 foot tall man, and he slowly started shrinking. His legs, arms, and torso shortened, his flat stomach, and sharp jaw line became softer, like remanence of baby fat, and dirty blonde hair slowly faded until it was a snow white, contrasting heavily with sun kissed skin. No longer was 'Dream, the manipulative, tyrannical bastard' sitting before them, but instead 'Dream, the white haired...child?'. The only way they knew it was still Dream was by the long stream of angry curses, and pleading words that hadn't stopped, of course now instead of being the deep, somewhat wispy voice they were used too, they voice that spoke was higher pitched, and slightly softer. And the identical, albeit smaller, clothes he wore.

It was Tommy who voiced what they were all thinking. "What the FUCK?!"

"LANGUAGE!"

___________________

"You can't seriously be saying we should put a child in Prison." Puffy hissed from where the 'adults' gathered to talk about the new situation.

"I am 230 years old!" Dream hissed, flashing a sharp pair of canines. He then smacked away Tommy's hand when the blonde went to poke his cheek, specifically a freckle that was right on the axis of his nose and right eye. "Stop touching me!"

"I'm not touching you!" Tommy growled back, moving his finger back into place.

"Tommy, stop picking on him." Bad scolded, turning back to the adults. "He's just a little muffin, we can't lock him in a big scary prison!"

"Did you forget about what all he's done?" Quakity dead panned, waving his arms around in a dramatic display of pointing at the things in the bunker that Dream had taken hostage.

"Well of course not!" Bad denied. "But-"

"Tommy and Tubbo have gotten into a lot of trouble too, and they're older than Dream, we haven't put them in prison." Puffy reasoned. "Come to think of it, might as well throw Sapnap, and Quakily, and-"

"The point is, no one is innocent here. But Dream is a child, we can't just lock him up. He barely looks 10 years old." Nikki broke in.

"You were all for throwing Dream in jail earlier." Punz yawned, lazily leaning on the wall.

"I agree with Punz! Go back to that idea! And give me back my mask!" Dream yelled. "And I told you: I'm 230 years old! I am not a child!"

"So we let him get away with everything that he's done?" Quakity ran his hand down his face in frustration.

Puffy sighed. "Of course not, we could ground him, sign him up for therapy, give him a stable home. He obviously wasn't raised right."

"Hey! My mother did a wonderful job raising me!" Dream was again ignored. "Well, when she was alive-"

"See, dead mother." Puffy pointed out.

"Yeah. Now you listen to me." The white haired vampire grumbled. Finally, Tommy poked into to Dream's cheek. Angrily, Dream turned and bit down, hard, on the offending finger, biting down until he tasted something matallic.

"Ow! You bit me!" Tommy screeched, pulling his finger back. Dream smiled, licking the blood from his lip. "Puffy, Dream bit me!"

"Dream we don't bite people." Puffy sighed, narrowing her eyes in disappointment. "Apologize to Tommy. Right now."

"No!" Dream pout-scowled, he scowled, sighing with every fiber in his being. "I am not a child! I have been alive longer than any of you have! I'm not a child, and I refuse to be treated like one!"

A small silence stretched on before Bad broke it. "I think he needs a nap." The demon fretted and scooped the tiny Vampire into his arms. "We'll figure out what to do later, for now we should head to the community house and put the little Muffin down for a nap."

Humiliation colored Dream's face into an angry, and embarrassed red as he was carried like a toddler out of his secret bunker. "I'm not a child!" He whined, but it was all in vain, because no one was listening to him.

Notes:

The reason I call him a sorta-kinda-not really child is because in human years, he would be considered far older than a child, however he does look like he is ten years old, however also, he is considerably young for a vampire. So its a whole lot of confusing.

Anyway, Dream is not actually a child he is a 230 year old pureblooded End Vampire, However vampires age very oddly so despite him being 230 years old he looks like hes about 10 give or take a few years.

How Pureblood End vampire aging works is: 1st 10 years of life of vampire ages as any human would but at age 10 they stop and they stop aging physically for a couple 100 years(about until 260 years they are 10), and then they age normally up until 16 and then stop aging for another couple 100 of years(about until 476), And then from there they age normally up until they look about 25 and then they stop aging physically altogether.

Turned vampires are different as they just look the age they were turned as forever until they are killed.

Also End Vampires can be turned no matter how long their mortal body has been dead, so there is a 'Revive Book', but all it really does is explain the process or getting turned, so only a Pureblooded End Vampire can turn/revive someone.

Feel free to use this bs Logic^ for whatever you want, I don't care.