Chapter Text
Dear Ryuunosuke,
I have something important to tell you. Please meet me outside the literature department building after you finish class.
-Atsushi 🐯
Akutagawa reread the note for what seemed like the millionth time, running his finger over the small tiger Atsushi had drawn next to his signature, unfolding and refolding the paper in a futile attempt to make time pass faster. Just over an hour earlier, Atsushi had pressed the note into Akutagawa’s hand as they walked past each other in the hallway, but now the distinct silver-haired boy was nowhere to be seen.
He insisted to himself that he wasn’t even a little bit nervous about what Atsushi wanted to tell him. Atsushi had been following Akutagawa around like a stray dog since the day Atsushi started at Yokohama University—despite Akutagawa’s initial annoyance with the wide-eyed freshman. After one of Atsushi’s professors reached out to Akutagawa to request he tutor the younger boy, they were practically forced to spend time together. As it turned out, Atsushi’s adopted brother had been the teacher’s assistant for Akutagawa’s short story-writing class, but he had put the boy through hell criticizing his work for the whole semester. Which is why Akutagawa was shocked when the professor said Dazai had specifically recommended him as a tutor and even praised his skills.
Their first meeting was unsurprisingly disastrous. Akutagawa had hardly read through one page of Atsushi’s writing when he began slashing the paper with red marks and cutting down every aspect that Atsushi thought made his writing unique. After all, that’s how Akutagawa had learned from Dazai. Unlike Akutagawa, however, Atsushi refused to let himself be beaten down and argued back passionately. Akutagawa was used to people accepting his criticism while shaking in fear, and he had never been questioned. It was equal parts infuriating and refreshing to deal with the plucky freshman. In the span of a short time, they had learned a lot from each other and their arguments evolved from angrily butting heads into challenges to outdo one another. He would never admit it, but Akutagawa was amazed by the other boy’s sheer determination to prove his worth—although he could never tell who Atsushi was seeking approval from, or why he believed himself incapable of producing anything worthwhile.
But Akutagawa was shaken from his thoughts when Atsushi appeared in front of him. His white dress shirt was rumpled and his black tie hung loosely around his neck, clearly he had tried to make his way to their meeting spot quickly.
“I’m so sorry I was late! I got caught up talking with one of my professors and then—”
Akutagawa cut him off with a stifled cough. “It’s fine,” he said, his words muffled by the fist covering his mouth. “What did you need to tell me?”
“Oh!” Atsushi straightened up and Akutagawa pretended not to notice the way Atsushi’s face turned bright red. “W-Well, I just wanted to tell you…” He looked down, fiddling with his fingers and anxiously tucking his uneven bangs behind his ear. “I wanted to tell you that I like you, Akutagawa!” Atsushi beamed up at him, his smile somehow brighter than those gold and violet eyes that had haunted Akutagawa’s thoughts all day.
“Whoa! Are you okay? Did my confession really make you that sick?” He asked worriedly, then jumped to rub Akutagawa’s back as the older boy worked through a shocked coughing fit. After a minute, Akutagawa was able to catch his breath.
“I’m fine,” he said, gently swatting Atsushi away with one hand while keeping his flushed cheeks covered with his other hand. “I was just caught off guard. Because,” he gulped for air, then rushed the rest of the words out quickly, “I guess I kind of like you too. Well, it’s strange to say ‘like’, although I’m not sure how to explain the way you light a fire in my soul. So I wasn’t expecting…that.”
Atsushi’s eyes widened even more, and Akutagawa cursed the sunset that seemed to be captive in his gaze. “Really? You do? You like someone…like me?” When Akutagawa nodded slightly, Atsushi couldn’t help but throw his arms around him. “I’m so happy!”
Their embrace was almost painfully awkward, with Atsushi resting his cheek on Akutagawa’s shoulder like a clingy kitten, while Akutagawa stood stiff as a board. After a moment, he cleared his throat again—this time as a perfunctory conversation starter rather than his usual respiratory distress.
“So…where do we go from here?”
Pulling back, Atsushi looked up at him with confusion in his eyes. Akutagawa tried his hardest to ignore the proximity of Atsushi’s smooth face, the way the shorter boy’s hands were resting gently on his shoulders. “What do you mean, where do we go? Are you late for something?”
“I mean…where does our relationship go from here? Usually when two people confess their mutual attraction, they would begin to date,” Akutagawa’s voice trailed off.
“Dating? Oh no, I can’t date you!”
——————————
“What the fuck does he mean, his dad said he isn’t allowed to date? I mean, Atsushi seems like a kid but he is technically an adult,” Chuuya asked through his glass of wine. Following the most awkward—and yes, only—confession Akutagawa had ever received, he all but demanded his roommate accompany him to a local bar. The dark-haired boy glared with unfocused eyes past the redhead, throwing back a shot before grinding his teeth and answering.
“He said his adopted dad had a rule against him dating until he was ‘mature enough.’
Even though he’s in university now, Atsushi wants to respect his father and focus on his studies,” Akutagawa grumbled, reaching to take yet another shot when Chuuya slid the glass out of his reach. “Plus, he said his dad pays for the apartment he and his brother live in and helped him get his scholarship, so he feels even more obligated to live by those rules.”
Chuuya swirled the wine in his glass and took another sip as he thought about how to respond. “Don’t get me wrong, the situation totally sucks ass for you—or maybe it doesn’t suck ass actually, if you know what I mean?” He smirked and elbowed Akutagawa, who snorted but tried to pretend he wasn’t drunk enough to laugh at such a crude joke. “But it does seem kind of nice, having a parent who cares about you that much, or loving someone enough that you’d sacrifice your own happiness to make them proud,” he said almost dreamily, then added, “Not like you and I would understand that.”
The two boys had only been roommates for the one semester since Chuuya transferred from Suribachi City College, but had bonded quickly after realizing they came from remarkably similar situations. Akutagawa’s parents died when he was eight years old, leaving him to care for his younger sister, while Chuuya had no memory of his parents—or anything else, for that matter—before age eight and his older sister was the closest thing he had to a parent. Both were jaded by their rough upbringings but they got along well.
Akutagawa took a sip of the water Chuuya had placed in front of him. “I just don’t know what to do,” he admitted quietly. “I mean, I actually like him and we can’t even be together. Of course something like this would happen to me.”
After another thoughtful sip of wine, Chuuya patted Akutagawa’s shoulder gently. “I’m sure it’ll be okay, somehow. You’ve been through worse.”
——————————
The following week, Akutagawa tried his hardest to stay away from Atsushi. Their mutual confession had made things awkward to begin with, but the embarrassment was quickly overshadowed by frustration. Chuuya teasingly called his roommate “emotionally constipated” which Akutagawa furiously denied, but he had at least admitted to himself that he needed some time to process his feelings. Deep down, he was afraid that he would lash out and cause Atsushi to leave him the way others always had when they dealt with Akutagawa’s prickly personality. He needed those thorns to protect the delicate rose that was his battered and beaten heart. Normally, it would have been easy to avoid crossing paths since Akutagawa was in his second year and Atsushi was only a first-year, but since they were both literature majors they spent the majority of their time in the same buildings. Growing up in the slums, Akutagawa was skilled at slinking undetected through the shadows, but Atsushi was stalking him like a starved tiger with its eyes trained on his prey. Their tutoring session felt more like pulling teeth than discussing how Atsushi could improve characterization in his stories. When that excruciating hour finally ended, Akutagawa all but sprang from his seat to escape the library, but he wasn’t fast enough to escape Atsushi’s cat-like reflexes.
“Please wait!” He begged, both hands gripping Akutagawa’s slim wrist. When some other students also jumped at the sudden noise, Atsushi shot them an apologetic look then lowered his voice and leaned in. “Can we please, please talk? We can go outside and I’ll tell you something important.”
Akutagawa pointedly ignored the shiver that went down his spine as the silver-haired boy’s whisper tickled his ear, and allowed himself to be pulled by the wrist to a bench outside the library entrance. He definitely did not care about the way Atsushi’s warm hand applied firm but gentle pressure around his thin arm.
Once the two were settled on a bench, Atsushi took a few deep breaths and rubbed his sweaty palms along his pant legs. “I spoke to my father, and he was very understanding. A-about the fact that I really like you and want to be your…your boyfriend.” He looked sheepishly up at Akutagawa, who refused to let his cold facade break even as his heart melted a little. “So we discussed it a bit and came up with a solution. It’s really, um, unconventional, but I think we can make it work!”
“…Well, what is it?”
Atsushi twirled the long black strand in his hair. “You see…my dad didn’t want me or my brother to date because we, well, we both had really troubled pasts. He was worried that we would hide behind relationships and rely on others for emotional support instead of building our own self-worth. So he said that, when my brother also feels ready to date someone, he would trust that we were doing it for the right reasons!” The smile he gave Akutagawa was blinding, and he squeezed his eyes shut as if he had just stared directly into the sun, because it was somehow just as painful to admire Atsushi.
“…You know I’ve met your brother, right?” He asked after massaging his temples for a moment.
Atsushi cocked his head in confusion. “Yeah, I know. What’s wrong with that?”
A sharp pain shot through Akutagawa’s head at the memories of Dazai that came flooding into his mind. His annoyance and insecurity hurt like an icepick to the brain, which Akutagawa would have genuinely preferred in that moment because it would allow him to forget the hours he spent working for Dazai’s approval only to be told he would never be good enough. “Your brother is…quite honestly, he’s crazy. Absolutely batshit.” He stopped for a moment, unsure how to continue. “I mean, he asks pretty much every woman out, but they always turn him down because your brother’s idea of a romantic date is a double suicide. He’s also very…He refuses to have a genuine connection with anyone and treats others as if they’re below him. If we can’t date until your brother has a stable relationship…”
He nearly jumped when Atsushi laced their fingers together. “Ryuu…” Both of them blushed all the way down to their entwined hands. “I know my brother is, uh, unconventional, but I think we can figure something out. I mean, love finds a way, right?” Atsushi froze after realizing the words that had slipped out of his mouth. “I mean, love for him! Finding love for Dazai! R-right, love has to come even for someone like Dazai, right?”
——————————
“I can’t imagine hating someone enough to inflict the pain of dating Dazai onto them,” Kunikida interjected with that trademark exhausted exasperation in his voice. Atsushi and Akutagawa had been discussing their plan with some other students while sitting in one of the open study areas in the literature department building, when the guidance counselor stuck his head out of his office.
“Huh? What do you mean?” Atsushi asked with wide-eyed innocence.
Kunikida sighed and scribbled something in his notebook. “In the three years your brother has been a student here, he has caused more trouble than anyone else at the university. Every time he comes over claiming he needs my guidance, I end up at the doctor with stress-induced stomach ulcers. The amount of time I spend with Dazai is directly correlated with increases in my blood pressure!” He showed Atsushi a graph drawn in his notebook that charted his physical symptoms on one axis and interactions with Dazai on the other. Atsushi nodded seriously while being amazed once more by Kunikida’s work ethic.
“No way! Dazai may be a bit different, but everybody deserves love!” This overly optimistic and entirely unfounded statement came from Kenji, who was in his final year at the high school affiliated with Yokohama University. “We just need to find someone who’s kind and patient enough to handle him gently. It can’t be that hard!” Everyone in the room stared at him and wondered how he could have such unshakeable faith in the goodness of humanity. Even Kyouka, who was his classmate and best friend, looked as if she was about to disagree, but ultimately no one had the heart to burst his bubble. “Don’t give up so easily, everyone!”
Kenji jumped up and spoke to a pair of girls that had just walked through the door into the common area. “Excuse me, miss! You’re very pretty and I was wondering if you were looking for a boyfriend?” His doe-like eyes were impossible to ignore.
One of the girls laughed and pinched Kenji’s cheek. “You are adorable, but I think you might be too young for me!” She responded while her friend giggled.
“Thank you, miss! But it’s not for me, it’s for my friend. His name is Dazai Osamu, do you know him?”
That caused the two to burst into uncontrollable laughter. The first girl wiped tears from her eyes as she struggled to breathe, while the other managed to choke out a response. “Nobody is stupid enough to date that suicidal freak!”
Kenji knit his eyebrows and frowned, like he couldn’t even process such an unkind thought. Eagerly, he looked to Kyouka for backup.
“He can be nice, sometimes. Every time I do something bad, he tells me it’s okay because he’s done something worse,” she offered in a soft voice.
“That’s really not comforting,” one of the girls said before they quickly turned to escape the conversation.
Akutagawa’s head fell onto the table in front of him as he mumbled something about being hopeless. Atsushi chewed nervously on his lip as he squeezed Akutagawa’s hand.
“…I can’t think of anything,” admitted Tanizaki, another freshman who shared a few classes with Atsushi. “But I know someone we could talk to. It’ll be a pain to ask, but I know he would have some good ideas.”
——————————
Chuuya had lost track of time waiting for his roommate at the bar that had become their usual over the course of the semester. He had sampled quite a few wines, and made a mental note to find some more high-end places. College clubs were fine for getting drunk and dancing, but Chuuya was more interested in having a fine liquor selection. He was busy dreaming of the exquisite wines he could drink if he was able to fulfill his dream of studying abroad in France, when he was jostled out of his thoughts by someone roughly grabbing his shoulder. “Oi, what do you think you’re doing?” He slurred angrily, before realizing Akutagawa was the one shaking him. “Hey, look who finally decided to show up! Oh, is this that kid—uh, Nakajima, right?”
Atsushi released his grip on Akutagawa’s hand to give Chuuya a quick bow. “You can just call me Atsushi! Nice to meet you!”
Chuuya grinned at Akutagawa. “I like this kid! Probably not as much as you do, but he seems nice.” He then switched his attention back to Atsushi. “Nice to meet you too, kid. You can call me Chuuya. What can I treat you to tonight? We should get some champagne to celebrate your new relationship!”
“Maybe not yet, Chuuya-san,” Akutagawa said gently. “But I did have a few questions for you.” Chuuya nodded and gestured to the seats next to him at the bar, scooping his hat off from where it had been holding a seat for Akutagawa and gently putting it back onto his head. As Atsushi and Akutagawa settled in, Chuuya eyed them suspiciously, twirling the red hair twisted over his shoulder as he waited for them to explain.
“I-It’s nothing bad, Chuuya-san!” Atsushi spoke just a bit too loud. “Well, uh, Ryuu was telling me how you just transferred schools and he’s been concerned that you might have a hard time making friends here.”
“Ah, did he tell you about the incident at my old school?” Chuuya asked. When Atsushi shook his head, Chuuya laughed and finished off his glass of wine. “I guess I’m glad it’s not common knowledge yet, but I’ve heard other people talking. They probably don’t like me in the first place because I’m scum from Suribachi City—don’t look at me like that, I know the reputation we have. The community college isn’t great and I won’t pretend it is, but it was all I could afford. Anyways,” he continued with a wave of his hand, “Some stuff happened and there was an accident with my friends. Everyone’s fine now, but legal action was threatened and I finally had the opportunity to transfer so I took it. But I know that it was in the news and I’ve heard the rumors about me on campus, that people are scared of me. Saying I’m violent or dangerous. Not that I care what they think!” He laughed, but his smile didn’t reach those brilliant blue eyes. Despite Chuuya’s best efforts to keep things lighthearted, the air in the club felt rather somber all of a sudden. Atsushi let the moment pass before speaking up.
“What if I said I could introduce you to someone who wouldn’t care about all of that?”
——————————
“Nobody is stupid enough to date that suicidal freak!” The girl had said. Atsushi had winced at the cutting remark, but it hurt more because he knew it was true.
“I know someone we could talk to. It’ll be a pain to ask, but I know he would have some good ideas,” Tanizaki had said, even going as far as saying it was the smartest person he knew. He had written down an address and what looked like a shopping list for a child’s birthday party: candy, soda, chips, pastries, and fruits.
Atsushi and Akutagawa made their way to the address Tanizaki had given them, their arms laden with grocery bags. After knocking on the door, Atsushi could’ve sworn he heard someone inside the apartment say something like, “I told you they’d be coming soon!” When the door swung open, a tall man with dark hair covering his eyes quietly ushered them inside. Atsushi was sure his eyes were deceiving him—there was no way this man actually had a raccoon on his shoulder, right? It had to be some sort of weird-looking cat. The man and his raccoon guided his visitors to the living room and gestured for them to sit on one of the very soft-looking couches, opposite another couch covered in blankets. Akutagawa set the grocery bags on the coffee table and looked at their host, clearing his throat pointedly. Suddenly, the lump of blankets on the other couch began to shuffle until a man with unruly dark hair emerged from it like a cocoon. He spared a momentary glance at the couple sitting across from him but his piercing green eyes focused on the grocery bags on the table. As if expecting this, the man with the raccoon removed a bottle of soda and a box of baked goods from the bags and handed them to the man on the couch.
“There should be some blueberries in there for Karl too,” he said through a mouthful of food, and the raccoon scurried down its owner’s arms to grab a handful of fruit from the bag. The man happily tucked into his snacks, nodding in approval. “Tanizaki must have sent you. Ah, he knows exactly how to get my attention!”
Akutagawa responded stiffly, “You must be Edogawa Ranpo. I’ve heard you’re the smartest student in the university, but you’re hardly ever on campus.”
Ranpo grinned at the praise. “Did you hear that, Poe-kun? The smartest student in the university!”
The other man stood up straighter and beamed at Ranpo. “Of course! Your reputation as the world’s greatest detective precedes you!”
“Detective?” Atsushi asked quietly, leaning into Akutagawa’s shoulder.
“Yes! I’m getting my masters in criminal psychology right now, but I hardly need that degree when my track record is so impressive.”
Poe, as the taller man was apparently called, nodded enthusiastically and turned towards Atsushi. Although his eyes were covered by his shaggy hair, Atsushi could practically see the admiration beaming from them. “Ranpo-san has been contracted by the police department for years to help them with their toughest cases. There’s no mystery he can’t solve!”
“Oh, that’s very impressive!” Atsushi said while smiling at Ranpo. “That must be why Tanizaki-san sent us to you. We’re here because we need—”
“I know why you’re here,” Ranpo said in between bites of cake. “You need someone to set your brother up with so you two can date.”
“Tanizaki-san already explained the situation to you?”
Ranpo cut him off with a shake of his head. “Didn’t need to, I could figure out that much easily.” He smirked when Atsushi and Akutagawa shared a confused look. “I told you I was the smartest detective in the world. Anyways, the solution is very obvious since you have two people with bad reputations involved.”
Atsushi blinked at him a few times, then turned to Akutagawa who shrugged back at him. “Um, I’m sorry Ranpo-san, but I don’t quite understand what you mean…”
Ranpo groaned and slumped back into the blankets pooled around him. “Really, you would all be lost without me!” He pointed his fork at Atsushi. “I’ve heard that your adopted father won’t let you date, but he recently changed that rule to allow it as long as your brother dates as well. I have met your brother actually, so I understand how difficult it would be to find anybody willing to date him.” He stabbed another piece of cake with the fork and gulped it down. “And you,” he continued, now pointing his fork at Akutagawa, “aren’t too happy about it since you know firsthand how brutal Dazai can be. But you’re also worried about your roommate, that new transfer student in the physics department. That short kid with the fancy hat. What’s his name again?”
“Nakahara Chuuya,” Akutagawa replied, his dark eyes clouding over as he tried to connect all of these topics in his mind. “But I don’t see what he has to do with this.”
Again, Ranpo rolled his eyes and mumbled something about everyone and their lower intellect being hopeless. After polishing off his cake and accepting the bag of potato chips Poe had opened for him, he continued. “Mr. Fancy Hat would die before he admits that he’s a little hurt by the rumors spreading about him. That incident at the bar by his old school was made out to be his fault entirely and now people think being his friend is a death sentence.” He crunched loudly on a chip. “Akutagawa-kun over here has been trying to help him adjust to all these changes, but it’s hard to balance a new roommate with your new boyfriend, not to mention supporting your younger sister. So isn’t the conclusion here obvious?”
Atsushi stared blankly at him, nearly dumbfounded at the leaps in logic Ranpo seemed to be making. How did his father’s rule affect Akutagawa’s roommate whom he had never even met? He was shaken out of his thoughts by a strange chittering sound from the raccoon who had finished his blueberries and was now looking for more snacks.
“What are you…?”
“Like I said, it’s obvious! No one likes Dazai, and everyone is scared of Chuuya. You can set them up with each other!”
——————————
“There’s no way in hell I’m doing that.”
“Chuuya-san, please!” Atsushi was practically begging for his help. He and Akutagawa were seated across from Chuuya at a table in the back corner of the bar, where the loud music didn’t shake the floor and the smell of sweat and stale alcohol didn’t distract from the conversation.
“Kid, I’m sorry, but I’m not gonna do that. You seem really nice and you clearly make our little Ryuunosuke happy,” Akutagawa crossed his arms and scrunched up his nose at his roommate, who continued speaking without a concern for the glare being directed at him. “From what he’s told me anyways, your brother seems absolutely infuriating. It just won’t work.”
Atsushi sighed and dropped his head onto the sticky table. His words were muffled when he sighed, “I guess you’re right. Sorry to ask so much of you when we’ve just met. Well, Ryuu, I guess we can come up with something else…”
“I’ll pay you.”
Chuuya choked on his wine, the cheap wine burning his nose as he coughed. “What?”
Akutagawa straightened up in the cracked vinyl seat, his arms still folded across his chest. “I said, I’ll pay for you to date Dazai-san. You don’t actually have to like him, just take him out. I’ll cover the cost of any date activities as well as throwing in a little extra for motivation.” When Chuuya raised his eyebrows in suspicion, Akutagawa doubled down. “I’ve seen you eyeing the fancy wines when we go grocery shopping, I’ll buy you as many bottles of Petrus as you can carry.” When Chuuya pretended to look unswayed by the offer to buy him absurdly expensive wine, Akutagawa reached further. “Remember the other day when you were complaining that you’re too busy with school to work so you can’t save up for your trip to France? I’ll help you pay for that if you pretend to date Dazai.”
Chuuya’s face had gone through a wide range of emotions as Akutagawa spoke, but even Atsushi could see that he was now seriously considering the offer. He turned the offer over in his mind a few times, testing it out as though sampling one of those fancy wines he craved. Atsushi began nervously chewing on his nails, until at long last the silence was broken. “How long do I have to pretend to date him? I mean, I’m happy to help out for a bit but I’m not gonna get married to this guy just so you can get married too.”
“A-aren’t you thinking a little too far in advance?” Atsushi spluttered, blushing bright red and pointedly staring at a stain on the table. Akutagawa’s face sported the same shade of brilliant crimson, creeping all the way down to his black turtleneck. His eyes flicked towards Atsushi then to the ground, simultaneously embarrassed that Chuuya would bring up marriage when Akutagawa and Atsushi hadn’t even been on a proper date yet and also a little offended that Atsushi seemingly didn’t think Akutagawa had the potential to get as far as marriage.
Chuuya’s loud laugh cut through all the background noise. When he was finally done choking on his giggles, he wiped his eyes with his black gloves and focused on the couple sitting across from him. Atsushi was squirming while Akutagawa held completely still. After collecting himself a moment, Atsushi said, “I think my father would be alright with me continuing to date Ryuu even if you and Dazai broke up…I mean the rule is that I can’t start dating until he does, not that we have to go on double dates all the time or anything…B-but, I think the problem will be convincing Dazai…”
“Who said we had to tell him?” Chuuya and Atsushi’s eyes shot to Akutagawa, whose dark gaze seemed ready to burn a hole through the table as he spoke through gritted teeth. Was that intensity fully from his desire to be with Atsushi, or was he also taking advantage of this as an opportunity to bite back at the person who had caused him so much pain? Chuuya snorted and rested his head on his hand, a mischievous smile playing across his face as he caught on.
“And you’ll pay me how much to trick this asshole into thinking I want to date him?”
Atsushi cringed a bit at hearing Chuuya refer to his brother as an “asshole”. Especially considering Chuuya had never even met him! Sure, Atsushi knew his brother’s reputation wasn’t great and he was a bit eccentric, but it had always seemed relatively harmless to him…
Akutagawa grinned wickedly. “Oh Chuuya, it’s tacky to discuss money. You know I have enough to make it worth your while.” He kept the details of his past relatively secret, but Chuuya knew that Akutagawa’s left an exorbitant inheritance for their children when they died. The money had been left to accrue interest until Akutagawa could claim it at age 18, so the fortune was even more massive than Chuuya could imagine. He had a momentary vision of drinking extravagant wine under the Eiffel Tower as it glittered brighter than the stars above him and he could feel the last of his resolve vanish.
“Well, what do I have to lose?”
Chuuya was still fantasizing about all the museums he would visit in Paris as he followed Atsushi back to his apartment. He didn’t notice that Atsushi and Akutagawa were whispering to each other and giggling, how Atsushi held his boyfriend’s hand and swung it between them as they walked. His daydreaming was only interrupted when he crashed into his roommate’s back and realized the couple in front of him had stopped so Atsushi could type a code into the electronic lock on the door to a large apartment building. The entryway alone was nicer than any place Chuuya had ever dreamed of living, the elevator moved smoothly and silently as they ascended to the tenth floor, even the hallway carpet was luxurious. For a moment, he let himself imagine how different his life would be if he had grown up with parents rich enough to afford a place like this.
“It’s a really nice apartment, isn’t it?” Atsushi asked gently, clearly having seen Chuuya practically drooling over the place. He rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed, before explaining, “Our father used to be a high-ranking military official, so he gets a good pension from that on top of his current government job. I grew up in a dirty orphanage, so it’s hard to believe I get to live here now. I don’t really deserve it!” Self-deprecation tainted the awkward laugh Atsushi forced out of himself as he showed his guests to the couches in the open living room. Chuuya slid onto the black leather and held in a sigh at the way the cushion seemed to cradle him perfectly. He continued to look around the apartment, which was clearly very new and decorated in a combination of modern and traditional style that somehow worked perfectly. As expected of two literature students, there were several well-stocked bookcases that were neatly organized. A framed family portrait rested on top of the one nearest Chuuya, with Atsushi sporting his familiar grin and his unruly hair tamed as best as he could attempt, sitting in front of two tall men. Their father wore traditional clothing, with his long grey hair neatly styled, his stern gaze piercing as if he could see through the photo. Next to him stood Atsushi’s brother, dressed in a neat black suit and his lips quirked in a half-smile that didn’t reach his brown eyes. That’s who he was supposed to date? The bandages peeking from his collar and the sleeves of Dazai’s suit were a bit odd, but he could do worse, Chuuya supposed.
Then he turned his eyes to look at the skyline through the window next to him. The whole wall was glass and afforded a perfect view of the city and the bay beyond. Instead of the city lights, Atsushi was gazing at Akutagawa with the same level of admiration, and a blush burned across his face when he realized Chuuya was now inspecting the couple’s reflection in the window. “C-can I get you anything, Chuuya-san? Maybe some water?” When he shook his head, Atsushi continued, “Alright then. I’ll bring Dazai out here so you two can meet, then uh,” he looked at Akutagawa and his cheeks somehow turned even more red, “Ryuu and I will excuse ourselves to my room after a bit so you can speak with Dazai alone.”
Chuuya smirked and raised his eyebrows, letting out a low whistle. “Great plan,” he said as he winked mischievously. Atsushi looked like he might die from embarrassment as he stiffly turned to walk down the hallway and knocked on the door at the end of the hall.
“Dazai? Can you come out here for a moment? I want you to meet some of my friends,” Chuuya could hear Atsushi say after peeking his head into what must have been his brother’s room. After a moment, the door opened all the way and a man followed Atsushi out into the living room.
“Akutagawa-kun, always a pleasure to see you,” Dazai sang as he casually sank onto the other couch. Chuuya bristled at the hardly-concealed malice in the man’s tone, reminding himself that he only had to get Dazai to accompany him on a few dates before they could part ways, hopefully forever. He never wanted to be on the receiving end of the cold look that Dazai attempted to disguise with his wam demeanor.
Turning white but standing his ground, Akutagawa nodded at Dazai. Atsushi grabbed his hand and gently rubbed circles into it as he introduced Chuuya. “Akutagawa brought his roommate over, he just transferred from Suribachi City College.” His bright tone and forced optimism did nothing to help the mood in the room. Instead, Dazai’s eyes slid over to Chuuya and he feigned surprise.
“Nakahara Chuuya, huh? I’d heard your name in the news, but I haven’t seen you around campus yet. Even with that tacky hat and your offensively red hair, you’re hard to spot since you’re so tiny. I didn’t even notice you in my own home until our dear Atsushi pointed you out.” Dazai bared his teeth at Chuuya in what he assumed was supposed to be a smile but felt more like staring down the jaws of a rabid street dog.
Chuuya had lived through more than his fair share of trauma. At age eight he had woken up in a hospital with no memories yet filled with a deep dread that screamed at him to escape. After doing exactly that, Chuuya continued to run until he collapsed in a dirty alleyway, where he slept for several days until his hunger pangs became unbearable. He had fended for himself until a kind girl only a few years older than him took him in, and the two did all sorts of unthinkable things just to stay alive. After finally turning his life around, settling into a group of friends that felt almost like a family, he lost almost everything in that incident and was once again starting over in Yokohama, away from the slums that had become his home. Chuuya steeled himself with a deep breath as he batted his eyelashes and returned Dazai’s faux-friendly grin.
Despite everything in his past, Chuuya knew that pretending to be in love with this fucker would be the hardest thing he’d ever do.