Chapter Text
Things had gotten a bit complicated ever since Tommy was release from prison.
The first thing Tubbo noticed was the white streak in Tommy’s hair.
Neither he, or Ranboo brought it up, considering the first thing Tommy did when arriving at their place in Snowchester is pass out on the couch. Tubbo stared at Tommy, still passed out with bags under his eyes, tattered clothes, and a white streak in his hair.
“Tubbo?” Ranboo’s voice cut through his train of thought. “Uh, Are you okay? You’ve been like this since we first saw Tommy,” The enderman questioned, a look of concern written out on his face. Tubbo sighed, slumping in his chair. “I’m fine, Ranboo,” He started, “I just- I want to know what happened, yknow?” Ranboo nodded in agreement. He didn’t know Tommy as well as Tubbo, but he did burn a house down with him. And he still kept that flower. “Like, all we know is that Tommy went to visit Dream. Tommy ends up dead a week later. Then Tommy’s Alive again, and-“
”Tubs?” Tommy’s voice came from the couch, slurring his words. “Stop fookin arguing…..I can’t sleep…” Tommy put his face on a pillow. Tubbo was surprised, to say the least. On the way over, Tommy said he wasn’t tired. And sure, Tubbo could see through that bullshit right away; However, He thought that maybe Tommy had changed a bit from the whole, you know, being dead thing.
“Old habits die hard,” Tubbo thought, smiling over at Tommy as the blonde boy drifted to a peaceful sleep again. “Tubbo, I know you want answers, but I think it’s best if he sleeps,” Ranboo whispered, leaning down so his husband could actually hear him. “Yeah, I guess you’re right…” The two sat in silence for a while, the muffled footsteps of Michael being the only sound to be hear clearly. “You should probably check on Michael,” Tubbo finally spoke, trying to give Ranboo an excuse to leave. The boy in question looked at Tubbo with concern, but sighed, knowing that he wanted to be left alone. “Alright Bo, Just uh..Tommy’s gonna be ok,” Ranboo said, standing up and giving Tubbo a quick pat on the head before going upstairs to Michael’s room.
Tubbo sighed, getting up from his chair and starting a kettle for tea. Tommy would need something to drink later. As the sound of slowly heating water filled the evening air, Tubbo thought back to when Pandora’s Vault never existed, when Wilbur was still alive, When he and Tommy could make jokes out of the bleakest circumstances without even trying, and when D- Schlatt, was still around.
Even with him gone, the small britt still felt like Schlatt was still here. He knew for all accounts he was dead, hell; Quackity ate his heart for fucks sake. But that didn’t shake the feeling of the horned tyrant peering over Tubbo, waiting for him to mess up and have an excuse to yell. By the time Tubbo figured out his heritage, he already held a distain for Schlatt. He had destroyed the country he called home, and exiled two of his closest mates.
He would never forgive him for what he did.
But, a tiny part of him wanted to.
A tiny part of him wanted to actually know his father, to see if it was just the whiskey, to see if he could’ve provided for him in ways he never did, but when those thoughts came up, he shoved them back down again. Tubbo knew those ideas would only bring him more pain.
Tubbo didn’t know when he’d taken the kettle off the stove and started pouring it until he felt a slight twinge of pain on his hand. Snapping out of his thoughts, he realized he’d started pouring the water on the counter.
Fuck
Sighing as he got an actual cup, his hands shook as all the memories of the Schlatt Administration slowly trickled back into his memory. He was able to put the glass of tea on the table next to Tommy before beginning to cry. Tubbo staggered back as a sphere of weight bubbled in his chest. He couldn’t do this, he can’t do this. The britt pulled himself together enough to lay down in his bed.
Tubbo didn’t really let himself cry anymore, but he couldn’t stop the tears from flowing down his face, smothering his sobs with a pillow. He wanted this to stop, he didn’t want this pain anymore. All it did was make him push people away, invest time in nuclear weapons and prevention methods for radiation poisoning. He and Ranboo had gotten into arguments about this before, mostly Tubbo accidentally snapping at Ranboo and feeling horrible after. Those nights ended with Ranboo holding Tubbo in his arms, the smaller one mumbling apologies over and over till they both fell asleep.
And god he wishes that Ranboo was here, but no. Tubbo decided to push him away. He wanted the comfort, but never knew how to ask. “Are you serious,” Tubbo thought to himself. “First Tommy, and now your own husband?! Damn, you really are a fuckin mess. Can’t believe you were ever in the god damn cabinet. I was able to push you around as much as I wanted. And when I died, what did you do? Get pushed around by a duck and a fox! We’re goats, we could crush ‘em with our hands if we gotta! Ya don’t understand the fact that we have an advantage compared to them. But now I see why you got pushed around so much. You’re fuckin weak compared to me. Now go get me some whiskey-“
“SHUT UP!”
Tubbo yelled, but it felt like a whisper. Words unsaid until they were too late. The pillow he was crying into was across the room when Ranboo walked in. “Tubbo?” The enderman said cautiously. “Are you ok? I heard you yelling and-“ He froze when he saw the state his husband was in. Tubbo’s eyes were red and puffy, his chest rose and fell in an irregular rhythm, and when he looked up at Ranboo, all he could see in his eyes was fear.
Ranboo felt a tug at his heartstrings seeing Tubbo like this. He wanted to take away the pain, but he knew he could only delay it. So, he resorted to the thing he always did. “Is it ok if I come over there?” Ranboo asked, Tubbo nodded. As he walked over to him, the enderman finally had an idea what to do. Sure, Tubbo had used this trick on him dozens of times, but he hoped to XD it would work the same on him.
Sitting down on the bed next to Tubbo, Ranboo took a silent deep breath before speaking. “Is touch ok?” Tubbo nodded, sitting up slightly as if he knew what was happening. Ranboo placed a gentle hand on Tubbo’s wrist, freezing as the brunette flinched slightly. He waited a few seconds before he raised Tubbo’s arm up, his hand in a loose fist.
Carefully uncurling his fingers, Ranboo repeated the words he’d been told dozens of times.
”Your name is Tubbo,”
“My name is Ranboo,”
“We are married,”
”We have a son named Michael, who is still upstairs,”
“You are not alone,”
”You are here,”
Ranboo finished, aligning his hand with Tubbo’s now-opened palm. The smaller boy began to calm down, trying to ground himself in the words Ranboo spoke. He reached for his other wrist and repeated, except he said something different.
“You are safe,”
”You are loved,”
”You care for others,”
”You can heal,”
”You can cry,”
”Welcome home, Tubbo,”
Tubbo could think clearly, and the swell in his chest was not of dread, but of happiness. He wrapped his arms around Ranboo’s shoulders, calm, yet exhausted. Soft sobs left the goat hybrid as Ranboo could feel the dull prickle of water meeting his skin. He carded a hand through his husband’s hair, wrapping his arms around Tubbo as his breathing began to slow. The two stayed there for a while, Ranboo murmuring reassuring phrases, or well, trying, as Tubbo fell asleep. Ranboo let out a soft sigh when he did, staying as calm as possible. Even if in reality he was internally bouncing off the walls with happiness.
A loud cough made Ranboo quickly turn to the doorway, seeing Tommy standing there with a cup of tea.
”Hey,” Tommy started, glancing over at Tubbo. “He’s asleep right now,” Ranboo said quietly. The blonde walked towards the two, seeing Tubbo’s curled up form against Ranboo. “Has he been crying? Ranboo I swear to prime if you did something-“ “Hey, Hey! Quiet down, you’re gonna wake him up,” The enderman shushed Tommy, who was close to yelling at that point. “I didn’t do anything, he just had a bad….dream? Nightmare? I…I honestly don’t know,” He sighed, eyes cast at the floor. Tommy huffed, a bit glad that Ranboo wasn’t the reason for Tubbo’s crying. “Alright, you’re off the hook for now boob boy,” He whispered. Ranboo pondered for a moment “I think I might know what he was thinking about,” He said, making Tommy stare at him. “I-I mean it’s a big maybe, but I think-“ “Ranboo,” Tommy interrupted. “Just tell me,” Ranboo thought for a moment, then sighed.
”Who was Schlatt?”