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Nick Nelson has never known anyone like Charlie Spring.
Before Charlie came along, Nick's life was pretty ordinary. He attended his classes, went to rugby practice, occasionally hung out with his mates, and watched movies with his mum and Nellie in the evenings.
He enjoyed all of those things, but he wouldn't have minded a break from the monotony once in a while. (Apart from their summer holidays, because his mum always made them special.)
Then one magical morning in January, the cutest boy he'd ever seen walked into Nick's form group and completely transformed his life.
Regardless of how they spend their time together, every day always feels like a new adventure with Charlie by Nick's side. Whether they're doing homework, playing video games, or messaging each other for endless hours, Nick is now certain of three things:
One, Charlie is the kindest, most amazing person that Nick has ever known.
Two, Charlie is undoubtedly the best friend that Nick has ever had.
And three, Nick has the biggest, most undeniable crush on him.
He's had crushes before, so this is not unfamiliar territory, but the way Charlie makes him feel is unlike anything he's ever experienced before. The last person he liked had been Tara, and she certainly didn't cause him to have sweaty palms or a perpetually racing heart like Charlie does.
Speaking of Charlie…
"Fuck," Nick groans to himself as he opens Instagram. There aren't any new messages from Charlie, which isn't all that surprising since Nick has been obsessively checking their thread from the moment he woke up.
The last message he'd received was an enthusiastic see you soon!!! xx after Nick had texted Charlie to let him know he was on his way over yesterday.
Normally Charlie texts first because he generally sleeps in a bit later than Nick does, and Nick never wants to disturb him. Charlie insists that he doesn't mind, but Nick knows that Charlie struggles with falling asleep sometimes. Especially if they've been up late talking.
(Which lately, has been more often than not.)
It's just barely half ten though, so it's not unusual that he hasn't heard from Charlie yet.
Or, you made things incredibly awkward, whispers the nagging voice in the back of his mind.
As Nick was getting ready to leave last night, he was suddenly hit with an overwhelming urge. Charlie was still wrapped up in the blanket he'd been covering up with on the couch, and it was too much for Nick's poor heart.
"You look so cuddly like that," He had told Charlie.
"Do I?"
"Yeah."
Against his better judgment, Nick stepped forward and closed the gap between them. He had only intended for the hug to be brief, but once he was finally holding Charlie, it was nearly impossible to let go.
It might have been a lot less awkward if Nick hadn't suddenly rushed off, but he couldn't help it. He was deeply embarrassed by his impulsive actions, and he had to get out of there as quickly as possible.
He agonized over it the entire way home, along with the fact that he had almost held Charlie's hand. Charlie had fallen asleep right in the middle of the movie they were watching, but Nick didn't mind. He couldn't concentrate anyway, not once he caught sight of Charlie sleeping like an angel.
The film was long forgotten at that point, and all Nick could focus on was Charlie's outstretched hand lying between them. It would have been so easy to slot their fingers together if only he had the nerve.
He actually attempted it a couple of times, but he chickened out in the end. If Charlie had woken up, Nick honestly wouldn't have known how to explain that. So instead, he finally finished watching the film while silently begging the universe to help unscramble his brain.
He liked Charlie, he knew that much, but everything else was incredibly confusing.
It took a restless evening of self-reflection (and a considerable amount of Googling), but Nick eventually realized that his feelings for Charlie are definitely more than platonic.
Or, more accurately, he allowed himself to finally accept it.
He's not ashamed of his feelings, he's just never fancied another boy before.
Especially not one who practically stole his heart from the moment they met.
That was several months ago, but time has done nothing to diminish the warmth that blooms in Nick's chest at the mere sight of Charlie. Even thinking about Charlie makes him smile uncontrollably.
On more than one occasion, his mum has caught him swiping through the camera roll on his phone and grinning like an idiot.
"Charlie is a very special friend, isn't he?" She had commented one evening as they were watching a movie together. It was a valid question, to be fair since she looked over and caught Nick stalking Charlie's Instagram again.
"Yeah… he is" Nick had admitted.
He wanted to say more, but the timing just wasn't right. Not that he thought his mum would judge him for liking a boy, he just didn't want to mention it until there was actually something to tell.
Charlie may be openly gay, but that doesn't mean that he would necessarily be interested in Nick. What if Nick isn't his type? Does Charlie even have a type? They've shared many personal details with each other by now, but they've never actually discussed subjects like dating or crushes.
Nick really wants to know what sorts of boys Charlie is attracted to, but there's no easy way to phrase such a question without his intentions being painfully transparent.
He might as well just hand Charlie a note saying: Do you like me? Circle yes or no.
At least that would effectively get his point across, but Charlie deserves so much better than a juvenile love note.
Suddenly, Nick's phone chimes with a notification which startles him into dropping it right on his face. Smooth. That's probably going to leave a bruise, but he couldn't care less.
There's finally a message from Charlie, which simply reads:
good morning followed by a variety of sun and cloud emojis.
The relief Nick feels is so intense that it almost makes him light-headed. If Charlie is feeling awkward about last night, he's hiding it pretty well. Nick knows that Charlie would never actually ignore him, but he also doubts that Charlie would send such a cheerful message, either. So hopefully this means that Nick is in the clear.
Good morning! Nick replies while smiling down at his phone.
i'm being dragged against my will to go shopping with mum and tori rn. save me please Charlie begs.
You got it! Nick responds, along with a Captain America gif for good measure.
my hero! Charlie replies, which includes an entire string of heart-eye emojis.
Eight, to be exact.
Nick spends so long staring down at the message that Charlie sends another one in the meantime:
i would definitely much rather be hanging out with you
So ditch them and come see me instead Nick suggests. He's mostly joking, (especially since he knows Charlie has very little control over his family activities) but he figures there's no harm in suggesting it.
i wish!!! Charlie replies immediately, which makes Nick feel warm all over.
we're probably gonna be here forever Charlie adds, followed by a dozen sad emojis. sorry i'm just being overly dramatic as usual
"Why does Charlie have to be so cute?" Nick asks Nellie, who's currently lying against his side.
At the mention of Charlie's name, she immediately sits up and looks around.
"Sorry, Nell," Nick murmurs as he scratches her head affectionately. "He's not here, but thank you for validating my crush."
She seems to understand because she leans in and licks his cheek in solidarity.
"At least we can miss him together, right?" Nick laughs.
Nellie dutifully barks and licks his face again.
"I knew I could count on you," he grins as Nellie flops onto his lap.
Yeah, you are. But I suppose you're allowed to be dramatic if you're being forced to do something you have no interest in Nick replies.
you always know the perfect thing to say x
Now Nick is blushing, but thankfully no one's around to notice.
It's a gift Nick teases.
so what are you doing rn? Charlie asks.
Not much. Just hanging out with Nellie since we haven't actually gotten out of bed yet.
Before he can talk himself out of it, Nick leans over to snap a selfie with Nellie and sends it to Charlie.
In lieu of an actual response, Charlie replies with incoherent key-smashing which makes Nick's face flush hotly. Nick doesn't take a lot of selfies, but he thinks this one is pretty decent. His hair is an unruly mess, but maybe Charlie will think its cute.
Before Nick has a chance to overthink it too much, Charlie texts again:
OMG THAT IS ADORABLE!!!!!
Me? Or Nellie? Nick asks, while he still has the courage. Charlie was probably just making a generic statement, but Nick is also not about to waste the perfect opportunity to flirt a bit. He even adds a winking emoji just so his message doesn't look too serious.
nellie obviously Charlie replies and Nick can easily picture his mischievous smile.
I see how it is then. You like my dog more than me Nick counters. He also adds an excessive amount of frown emojis to emphasize his point.
did it really take you this long to figure it out? And then: i thought you were supposed to be the older and wiser one
Nick laughs out loud as he composes his next message:
I need a new best friend he teases.
Charlie's first reaction is a line of shocked emojis and then:
wait… i'm your best friend?
Did it really take you this long to figure it out? Nick says, clearly mimicking Charlie's other message.
well played Charlie replies. you're my best friend too
Suddenly Nick is flooded with an unexpected surge of emotions.
Sure, he knows they're really close friends at this point, especially since they've been hanging out a lot more lately, but he also knows that Charlie already has a well-established group of best friends.
I think your other friends would disagree
Nope, Nick can't send that so he backspaces quickly. It makes him sound jealous, which he truly isn't. People can have lots of best friends, so it's not like he's looking to replace anyone.
Well obviously he answers finally, opting to keep their familiar banter going instead.
He doesn't hear from Charlie again for nearly ten minutes but it's definitely worth the wait. Charlie has sent him a dressing room selfie while wearing the clothes that he's presumably been trying on.
It's a simple outfit: just jeans, which might actually be Charlie's own, and a bright blue jumper. It's got a pattern of little penguins and snowflakes on it, and it's almost as adorable as Charlie himself.
if i have to be stuck shopping at least I can look cute right?
Nick cycles through a lot of different answers before he finally says:
You always look cute x
It's probably crossing a line, he realizes, but how else is he supposed to work up the nerve to tell Charlie how he feels? He's got to start somewhere, and at least this type of flirting is easy to pass off as a genuine compliment. Well, it's definitely that too but it also doubles as flirting practice.
not always but thank you xxxx Charlie replies.
Nick wants to disagree, but Charlie probably doesn't even register it as flirting anyway, so Nick decides to drop the subject. Instead, he reluctantly ends the conversation by telling Charlie that he has to go do some chores for his mum.
He could easily spend all day texting Charlie, but he should probably go see if his mum actually does need his help with anything. Plus, he also doesn't want Charlie to get in trouble for being on the phone the whole time that he's supposed to be with his family.
🍁
The rest of Nick's Sunday actually is spent doing various tasks around his house, which he doesn't even mind because his mum had been so delighted when he offered to help.
"Thank you, Nicky, you're such a sweet boy" she had told him and kissed his forehead. Aside from Charlie, his mum is easily his favorite person in the world.
Helping her out also gave him a lot of free time to think about Charlie, which was nice. Not that he doesn't do that anyway, but it sure made folding laundry a lot more enjoyable.
Just as he's getting ready for bed that evening, his phone rings unexpectedly.
Nick rarely gets any calls, so he has no idea who it could be. It wouldn't be his dad at this hour, and Nick has never actually spoken to any of his other friends on the phone before.
They typically just text, or communicate through any of the various other forms of social media.
As he reaches for his phone, his breath catches in his throat as he realizes that it's Charlie calling him.
Normally he would just assume it was accidental, except he and Charlie have never spoken on the phone either. They also text through Instagram, so if Charlie is calling him, it has to be on purpose.
"Hello?" Nick answers hesitantly. He's hit with a brief flash of panic in the silence that follows because he suddenly worries that maybe something is wrong. "Charlie?"
"Oh, sorry," Charlie laughs a second later. "I didn't realize I hit the mute button."
"That's okay," Nick grins even though Charlie can't see him. "Is everything okay?"
"Yeah," Charlie says, sounding a bit uncertain. "I hope it's okay that I called. I know we've never spoken on the phone before, but I just kinda wanted to hear your voice."
Nick's heart flutters at that, but he manages to keep his voice steady.
"Of course it is, you can call me anytime you want," Nick assures him.
"Thanks," Charlie says, sounding relieved.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Nick presses. He doesn't want to be intrusive but he can't shake the feeling that something is wrong.
"I'm fine, I promise," Charlie insists. "I just had a stupid argument with my mum when we were out earlier, and everything just kind of spiraled from there. I almost took you up on your offer to come over, but I knew you were busy."
"Charlie," Nick says softly, "you should have just texted me. Or called, whichever you prefer. I'm never too busy for you, and especially not if you needed to get away for a bit."
Charlie is silent for a moment before he finally replies. "Thank you, I really appreciate that."
"Anytime," Nick says. "Isn't that what best friends are for?"
Charlie laughs at that, which sounds a bit shaky like he'd actually been fighting back a sob instead.
"Yeah, they are."
"Do you want to talk about it?" Nick asks.
"Not really," Charlie says, "but thanks for the offer. Everything is fine now, I promise."
"Well, I'm always here for you if you change your mind."
"Am I really your best friend?" Charlie asks suddenly. "I know you said it earlier, but like, I also know you have so many other friends."
"Yeah, you definitely are. What I have are a lot of acquaintances, actually," Nick corrects, "but I can't talk to them like I can with you."
"They are kind of intimidating," Charlie agrees. "I generally try to avoid them unless we're at rugby."
Nick frowns at that because he hates thinking about how much Charlie must struggle with being around them. And for what? Because he selfishly wanted to spend as much time with Charlie as he possibly could?
"That's my fault," Nick admits. "I just really like hanging out with you, so I thought rugby could be something fun for us to do together."
"It is," Charlie says. "I like hanging out with you too, or I would never have actually joined the team."
"Really?" Nick asks hopefully.
"Obviously," Charlie snorts. "I'm not just in it for the exercise."
"Well, you are getting pretty good at it," Nick replies.
"Shut up," Charlie says, and Nick can easily picture his adorably bashful smile.
"I will not," Nick counters. "You need to learn how to accept compliments."
Charlie laughs in response and says, "I'll work on it."
"Are you feeling any better?" Nick asks while climbing into bed and plugging his phone in.
"Much," Charlie tells him. "Seriously, thank you."
"Promise me something?" Nick says on a whim.
"Okay?"
"Promise you won't hesitate to call or text me again? I hate knowing that you were upset earlier and feeling trapped."
"I promise. The whole thing was my fault anyway. I wasn't in the best mood to begin with, and it all just kind of unraveled from there," Charlie explains.
"Did something happen to put you in a bad mood?" Nick asks, which makes him immediately worry that maybe Charlie actually was feeling awkward about last night.
"Not really," Charlie says. "It happens sometimes. I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed, I guess."
"Your bed only has one side," Nick teases.
"It's an expression, dork."
"I know that, nerd."
"I'm not a nerd," Charlie argues.
"Agree to disagree?" Nick suggests.
"No, I just disagree," Charlie insists.
"So, you're agreeing to disagree, then?"
"You're infuriating," Charlie laughs. "Why am I even friends with you?"
"Visitation rights, I presume?" Nick guesses, "since we both know you like Nellie better than me."
"But she's soft and cuddly!" Charlie protests.
Nick gasps dramatically. "So you're saying I'm not?"
"I - " Charlie falters. "Well, I suppose you could be," he concedes. "You do have a lot of really soft jumpers, like that one you let me borrow the first time I came over."
"That's actually the one I'm wearing right now," Nick admits. I wish it still smelled like you, he doesn't say. "So does that make me soft and cuddly then?"
He would never admit it to Charlie, but Nick hasn't actually washed that jumper since Charlie borrowed it. He hung it up to dry after their snow day, but then he snuck it back into his closet before his mum could throw it in the wash. It no longer smells like Charlie, but wearing it still makes Nick feel closer to him somehow.
"Sorry," Charlie says, sounding not very sorry at all, "but I'm going to need photographic evidence before I can properly answer that question."
"Well, I suppose I could arrange that. Hang on."
Nick snaps a few quick selfies and then he selects his favorite of the bunch to send to Charlie.
"There you go," he adds a moment later as he hears Charlie's phone chime with the notification. "So what's the verdict?"
It takes Charlie a few seconds to answer, but then he finally says, "On a scale from one to Nellie, I'd rate that a solid seven. Definitely cuddly."
Nick blushes immediately at that, but thankfully Charlie can't see him. "Thanks," he laughs. "I'm sure Nellie would appreciate her rating as well."
"Oh, is she there?" Charlie asks.
"Yep, I'm using her as a pillow," Nick jokes, which is partly true. He's lying against his own pillows but half of Nellie's body is tucked almost underneath them.
"Aww," Charlie says. "Give her a kiss for me."
Nick leans over and puts his phone right next to Nellie's head as he ducks down and gives her a noisy kiss so Charlie can hear.
"Done!"
Do you want one too? Nick wants to add, but he's not ready for that level of flirting yet.
This is why you have to practice, he reminds himself.
Nick isn't very good at flirting in his opinion, but that's probably because the last person he liked was Tara when they were thirteen. Everyone is terrible at flirting at thirteen, and Nick hasn't really had many opportunities to improve his skills until now.
"I wish I was there," Charlie says quietly.
"I wish you were too," Nick replies because he really does. Charlie would fit so perfectly in his arms, and Nick longs to simply be able to hold him while they watch a movie or just scroll through their phones. They don't have to be doing anything specific, just quietly enjoying each other's company is more than enough for Nick.
They're both silent for a moment and then Charlie says, "We should probably get some sleep."
"Yeah, probably," Nick agrees. He really doesn't want their conversation to end, but they have school in the morning. "Not that I'm looking forward to quadratic equations tomorrow, but at least I'll get to see you."
"Well obviously I'm the highlight of your day," Charlie teases.
"Obviously," Nick agrees, which is the absolute truth. "Good night, Charlie."
"Good night, Nick," Charlie replies before quickly adding, "sweet dreams," and ending the call.
They will be now, Nick thinks, smiling to himself as he reaches over and switches off his lamp.
🍂
The following morning, Nick arrives at school a bit earlier than usual because he has a plan. Not that being early has anything to do with it, he just needs a few moments to himself to help calm his nerves.
Normally he hangs out by the school gate in the mornings, but today he actually decides to wait near the bus stop. If he doesn't see Charlie soon, his heart might actually burst inside of his chest. His whole body is buzzing with anticipation, and he feels like he can hardly catch his breath.
It's ridiculous, he realizes. They haven't known each other that long yet, but he's never felt such an intense attraction or connection to anyone before.
He knows that abandoning his friends at their usual table is not likely to go unnoticed, but he can't make himself care about that right now. Especially not when he can see the bus approaching in the distance.
The universe must be on their side today because Harry is nowhere to be found yet. Neither is Imogen for that matter, which is a relief. Everyone knows that she has a crush on him, and sometimes Nick feels a bit guilty for not reciprocating because she's a nice girl.
She's sweet and makes him laugh, but she's no Charlie Spring.
Nick's heart beats out a steady rhythm of CharlieCharlieCharlie while he waits, and when Charlie steps off the bus, Nick feels like he can finally breathe again.
Tori, who's right behind him, actually waves at Nick before turning to whisper something in Charlie's ear.
Nick waves back, but she's no longer paying attention since she seems to be teasing Charlie about something. About Nick, perhaps? He looks a bit flushed, Nick observes, but that could easily be blamed on the frigid weather.
"Shut up!" Charlie orders as he playfully shoves her away.
"Have a good day!" she calls after him as he heads towards Nick.
"Hi," Nick greets as Charlie finally approaches.
"Hi," Charlie beams. "You're here?"
"I am," Nick agrees. It probably should be more awkward since they've never met up before school like this, but it's the happiest Nick has felt since he left Charlie's house on Saturday.
"Of course you are," Charlie groans in obvious embarrassment. "I just meant like - "
"I was waiting for you," Nick interjects just so that Charlie can't possibly interpret this any other way. He could pass it off as a coincidence, but he wants Charlie to know it was deliberate.
"Oh." Charlie looks around nervously. Probably wondering if anyone has noticed the obvious change in their morning routine. "I'm glad," he says finally as he looks back at Nick.
"Shall we, then?" Nick grins as he gestures towards the school.
Charlie adjusts the strap on his bag and says, "Lead the way."
🍁
After a quick stop at their lockers, they make it to form and get started on their homework. Or Nick does, anyway since he hadn't bothered finishing his maths assignment yet.
(Sue him, he was too busy thinking about Charlie.)
Charlie doesn't appear to have any homework, so he does a bit of revision while Nick struggles with his equations.
"Hey," Nick whispers a few moments later. "Help?" he says, giving Charlie a pleading look. "I can't seem to figure this one out."
"Mr. Nelson, keep it down, please," Mr. Lange immediately scolds.
Nick and Charlie share a private laugh as Charlie easily spots Nick's mistake and corrects it for him.
"You're a lifesaver," Nick says, though unfortunately not quietly enough.
"Nicholas!" Mr. Lange snaps. "It's far too early for your incessant chatter, so please behave yourself."
lange really needs to remove the stick from his arse Charlie DMs Nick a moment later. maybe that would make him a bit more tolerable in the mornings
It's so unexpected that Nick has to cover up his laughter with a fake cough. It works well enough though since Mr. Lange doesn't seem to notice this time.
Are you trying to get us detention?! Nick replies.
no i just like making you laugh x Charlie responds as he nudges Nick's shoulder.
Mission accomplished Nick sends back while bravely adding a heart emoji. He chooses the yellow one, which is warm and bright like Charlie.
They go back to studying for a while, but Nick can't concentrate. Especially not with Charlie sitting so close to him. He's gotten most of his work done anyway, so he's busy scrolling through his phone when Charlie texts him again.
i'm really glad you came over on saturday
At the mention of Saturday, Nick's heart races as he quickly replies.
Thanks for inviting me, I had a great time!
thanks for not being upset that i slept through half the movie Charlie counters, along with several face-palm emojis.
How could I be? You looked so adorable is what Nick wants to say, but his actual response is:
You can make it up to me next time we hang out
deal! Charlie sends back while turning to give Nick the sweetest smile. Nick feels like his heart might shatter from the weight of all the love he has for this boy.
Maybe after school today? My mum could pick us both up Nick offers, giving Charlie a hopeful smile in return.
so needy Charlie teases. And then: i GUESS i could force myself to hang out with you later he adds punctuated by an eye-roll emoji which cracks Nick up again.
Thankfully Mr. Lange is completely ignoring them now since class is winding down. They could probably even talk normally at this point, but Nick continues messaging since he's enjoying their conversation.
Thank you for your sacrifice Nick replies while reaching out to poke Charlie in the side. Predictably, he lets out a startled squeak which is the exact reaction Nick was hoping for.
Then, before he loses his nerve, he adds:
Maybe we could meet for lunch today too? If you're not busy that is. I know you usually have lunch with your friends.
are we not friends????? Charlie responds and turns to give Nick an exaggerated pout.
I meant your other friends!
i know Charlie texts, but youre just fun to tease he adds while turning to ruffle Nick's hair in retaliation.
Forget it. Our lunch date is off! Nick smirks as he types out his reply and sends it. It's not until he sees Charlie's shocked expression that Nick actually realizes what he's said.
date????? Charlie answers while regarding Nick curiously.
You know what I meant Nick quickly corrects. He would very much like it to be a date, but he hadn't meant to call it that. Not yet, anyway.
Charlie simply responds with: i know x and Nick can't help feeling a little disappointed.
Normally Charlie would never turn down an opportunity to tease Nick (all in good fun, of course), but he's probably afraid to cross a line that he thinks Nick wouldn't be comfortable with. Form is nearly over so Nick has to hurry up and fix this if he has any hope of Charlie taking his lunch invite seriously.
So where do you want to meet up? Nick replies immediately so he can keep the conversation going. He doesn't want it to end just because he had to make things weird. I mean if you're free for lunch that is he quickly adds because technically Charlie hadn't agreed yet.
Charlie reads the message but then he pockets his phone and shrugs.
Well, fuck.
It's not a rejection at least, but something definitely feels off.
In the minutes that follow, they pack their bags in silence as Nick mentally scolds himself for ruining the moment they were having. Maybe he was reading too much into it, but it seemed like Charlie might have even been flirting with him at one point.
(And Nick was definitely flirting back.)
"Art room?" Charlie suggests as they're heading out of class. "I eat lunch there sometimes, and Mr. Ajayi doesn't mind. We could meet there if you want?"
The usual sparkle in his eyes has been replaced by a sadness that Nick feels deeply guilty about. Charlie had probably been overanalyzing their entire conversation and worrying that he was the one who made things awkward.
Double fuck.
Nick desperately wants to fix this, but it will have to wait until later. For now, he boldly reaches out to squeeze Charlie's shoulder and says:
"It's a date."
🍂
The next few hours pass painfully slowly until it's finally time to meet Charlie for lunch. Nick is the first to arrive, so he wanders around the art room, admiring all of the projects on display.
Suddenly, a pair of cold hands slip over his eyes as Charlie says, "Guess who?"
"Harry Styles?" Nick teases, although he secretly wouldn't mind that. He still prefers Charlie though, which really says a lot about the intensity of Nick's crush.
"Sadly no," Charlie giggles as he drops his hands and steps in front of Nick. "It's just me, unfortunately."
"Even better," Nick grins as he reaches for Charlie and pulls him into a hug. It feels completely natural this time, and Charlie melts right into it.
"Better than Harry Styles?" Charlie laughs as he squeezes Nick tightly. "That's quite the compliment. You have seen him, right?"
Nick tucks his face against Charlie's neck and breathes him in. "I've seen you."
"Nicholas Nelson!" Charlie gasps while pulling back to meet Nick's eyes. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were flirting with me."
"And what if I was?" Nick challenges. He's not sure where this burst of confidence has come from, but he's grateful for it. Maybe it's the fact that he's finally alone with Charlie for the first time since Saturday, but he suddenly has no desire to be discreet about his feelings anymore.
"I'd be okay with that," Charlie blushes.
Nick moves his hands down to Charlie's waist and steps even closer. "Is that so?"
"Very much so," Charlie nods as he reaches for Nick's hand and leads him to a corner along the back wall of the room.
"Wow, this is really cool," Nick smiles as he kneels down to trace his fingertips over the intricate design painted on the floor.
"It's my favorite spot," Charlie says as he takes a seat on the ground and gestures for Nick to join him. "I used to come here a lot last year when the bullying was really bad. Mr. Ajayi was the only teacher who really cared, and he still lets me hang out here whenever I want."
"I'm so sorry you had to go through that," Nick says as he reaches over and squeezes Charlie's knee. "I wish I could have helped somehow."
"We didn't even know each other back then," Charlie points out, "and it's not like very many people were aware of it anyway. Mostly just the other bullies, since they were smart enough not to act up in front of the faculty members."
"I'm glad things are better now," Nick smiles. "They are better, right? He asks just to be sure.
"Loads," Charlie assures him as he reaches out and offers Nick both of his hands.
Nick clasps them firmly in his own and says, "Okay, good." He doesn't want to let go, but they're sitting at an awkward angle to hold hands like that for too long, so he eventually pulls back and starts unpacking his lunch.
He notices that Charlie hasn't brought anything with him, so Nick offers him half of his sandwich.
"Thanks," Charlie smiles as he accepts it and takes a small bite.
"I hope you're not allergic to peanut butter," Nick belatedly adds. "Sorry, I should have probably checked that first, before potentially poisoning you."
"I'm not," Charlie laughs. "I like peanut butter."
"And I like you," Nick beams.
Charlie doesn't reply, but the radiant smile he gives Nick is more than enough to make up for his lack of response.
"You know," Nick observes a while later as they're cleaning up the remnants of their lunch, "I don't think I've ever been in here before."
"That's because you're usually busy playing rugby," Charlie teases.
"Probably," Nick nods, "although I've never actually taken an art class since I lack any creativity whatsoever."
"Somehow I doubt that," Charlie disagrees, "but you should try it sometime. It can be very therapeutic."
"I've heard that before," Nick says thoughtfully. "Maybe one day I'll give it a go."
"We could paint something together if you like," Charlie suggests. "We still have some time, and I know where all of the supplies are."
"Won't we get in trouble for that?" Nick asks. He would love to paint with Charlie, but he definitely doesn't want to risk getting in trouble. Especially not since they've already made plans to hang out together after school.
"Who knew you were such a rule-follower," Charlie laughs as he bumps his shoulder against Nick's.
"Am not," Nick frowns, "I just really don't want to get detention today."
"Oh? And why is that?" Charlie asks even though he obviously knows the answer.
"Well, if you must know," Nick explains, "a cute boy is coming over later, and I'd much rather spend extra time with him instead of being stuck here after school."
Charlie inhales shakily and says, "Oh, well he sounds pretty special."
"He is," Nick agrees as he reaches over and traces an invisible pattern of shapes on Charlie's thigh. "I've never known anyone like him before, and I love that we can always talk to each other about literally anything."
Charlie blushes wildly as he looks down at his shoes.
"I honestly don't think I've ever had a proper best friend until we met," Nick continues. "Most of my friendships have always been pretty casual, and for the last couple of years, I've mainly been hanging out with the lads on the rugby team. Then there's Imogen," Nick pauses as he carefully chooses his words.
Charlie remains silent, but he scoots a fraction closer and lays a comforting hand on Nick's knee. It helps, and after a few moments, Nick feels ready to continue.
"She's a good friend," he says finally. "We get on really well, but she's also got a bit of a crush on me."
"And that's a bad thing?" Charlie asks. "I've never spoken to her before, but she seems very nice."
"She is," Nick agrees. "Imogen's great, and we always have a laugh together, but I just… I don't…"
"You don't feel that way about her?" Charlie offers.
"Exactly. I don't like Tara either, for the record, despite the fact that Harry is probably planning our wedding as we speak," Nick groans.
"What's up with that?" Charlie asks seriously. "Harry's got a very creepy obsession with your love life."
"No idea," Nick shrugs. "It's getting rather annoying, honestly. Tara and I kissed literally once when we were thirteen, but I don't really remember much about it."
Technically Nick does remember, but the details are so insignificant that he doesn't want to waste his precious time with Charlie talking about kissing someone who's very much not Charlie.
"Was that your first kiss?" Charlie asks. His cheeks are still rosy pink and all Nick can focus on is how soft his lips look.
"First and only," Nick admits, "which is kind of embarrassing, I suppose. I mean, I'm sixteen and I've literally only ever kissed one person."
Charlie shakes his head and says, "No it's not. There's no law that dictates how much experience you should have by now. Or for that matter," he continues while reaching out to hold Nick's hand, "that lacking in experience at any age should be considered shameful because it isn't."
"Thank you, I appreciate that," Nick says softly. "Honestly, I hadn't really given it much thought until recently. I just figured it would happen again when it's meant to. Not kissing Tara," he's quick to add, "I just meant like, kissing someone I fancy."
The silence stretches between them for a moment until Charlie tilts his head curiously and asks, "Is there anyone in particular that you're interested in?"
"Maybe," Nick replies while brushing his thumb over Charlie's knuckles.
Charlie gives him a cheeky smile and says, "I bet it's that cute boy who's coming round your house later, isn't it?"
"Did I say cute?" Nick muses as he studies Charlie's face. "I meant beautiful. Like, breathtaking, honestly."
"Nicholas," Charlie whines, "are you trying to set a record for how many times you can make me blush in one day?"
"Well..." Nick pauses to link his fingers with Charlie's, "pink is a rather attractive color on you."
"Nick!"
Nick laughs in response as he squeezes Charlie's hand and asks, "So, is there anyone you fancy?"
"There is," Charlie easily admits as he untangles their hands and grips the lapels of Nick's blazer. "He's sweet and kind, and I love that I can always be myself around him." Charlie pauses a moment to pull Nick closer and adds, "He makes me feel safe."
Well, now it's definitely Nick's turn to blush. "Charlie," he whispers as he takes a gentle hold of Charlie's face. His heart is pounding in his chest, but from the anticipation rather than nerves.
"Can I please kiss you?"
"Yes," Charlie grins while leaning in and meeting Nick halfway.
When their lips connect, Nick gasps at the contact because he's finally kissing Charlie.
It's new and exciting, yet somehow calming and familiar even though they've never kissed before. Maybe in another lifetime, Nick thinks, which would certainly explain the intense gravitational pull that's been drawing him towards Charlie since they met.
One kiss quickly melts into another, and then everything becomes a blur of soft lips and shared breaths for the next several minutes.
"Wow," Nick pants a while later when they finally come up for air.
Charlie giggles at Nick's dazed expression while gently running his fingers through Nick's hair.
"Is that good or bad?"
"Amazing, actually," Nick clarifies.
"You taste like peanut butter," Charlie smirks.
"Good thing you like it then," Nick grins.
"I like you," Charlie says as he clutches Nick's shirt and kisses him again.
"I like you too," Nick whispers between kisses. "God, I like you so much."
"I feel like I'm dreaming," Charlie says a moment later. "If this isn't real, please don't wake me up."
"It's real," Nick assures him and then kisses Charlie to emphasize his point. "Although, I do feel like I should probably explain some things. I know I should have mentioned this sooner, but I kinda had a full-on gay crisis after I left your house on Saturday."
"Nick... " Charlie pauses to reach down and lace their fingers together again. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I was confused," Nick admits. "I've known for a while that I was starting to like you - probably since the day we met if I'm honest - I just didn't realize what it all meant. Not fully, anyway. I knew you were gay, which obviously didn't matter, but it made me question some things about myself as we started growing closer. Then, the more we hung out, the more I realized how much I wanted to do things like make you laugh, hold your hand, kiss you..."
"Nick, you're shaking," Charlie interjects as he wraps an arm around Nick and pulls him close. "Just breathe for a minute, okay? Then you can tell me the rest."
"Okay," Nick nods as he settles into Charlie's arms. He actually is shaking, he hadn't noticed. He trusts Charlie with literally anything, he just hadn't planned on going into this much detail so soon. Everything happens for a reason though, or at least that's what his mum always says, and she's never steered him wrong.
"I'm sorry this has been so difficult for you," Charlie says as he gently rubs Nick's back. "I know how confusing those thoughts can be, especially when you don't know how to make any sense of them at first."
"But, that's just it," Nick explains as he sits up and meets Charlie's eyes. "You're the one thing in my life that's always made sense. Even if I didn't understand what I was feeling at first, I've always known that this," he gestures between them "is something special. We make sense."
"Yeah, we do," Charlie whispers, breath ghosting over Nick's lips as he leans in to kiss him slowly.
Nick returns the kiss eagerly, and then he gently pulls back and rests his chin on Charlie's shoulder.
"Thinking back, it probably shouldn't have been such a surprise to discover these things about myself," Nick continues. "I guess it's just one of those things you start to become distantly aware of when you start to see people differently. So on some level, I think I realized it before, but I just brushed it aside since I hadn't met a boy I was actively interested in."
Charlie remains silent, but he reaches for Nick's hand and gives it an encouraging squeeze.
"Until I met you," Nick grins up at Charlie, "and then all of these feelings came rushing to the surface. I was just really scared to say anything until I knew for sure. Especially because I didn't want you to feel like a shameful secret until I was ready to come out."
"Nick," Charlie protests as he drags Nick into a crushing hug. "You could never make me feel like that. Ever," he adds as he pulls back and rubs Nick's cheek.
"Well, it wouldn't be intentional," Nick says softly, "but you're so confident about your sexuality, and I'm not even sure if I'm gay, or bi, or what label fits me best. So the idea of coming out is scary when I don't even know what I am yet. I'll figure it out though, I promise."
"You're you," Charlie smiles, warm and bright, "and that's all you ever need to be."
"I think I can handle that," Nick agrees as he effortlessly lifts Charlie onto his lap and holds him close.
"Good," Charlie says as he leans in and kisses Nick's forehead.
"I don't want to hide it anymore though," Nick admits. "I'm okay with not choosing a label yet, I just really want to be with you. I mean, if you want that too, of course, and I want us to be able to tell the people who matter."
"What about the people that don't? People like Harry?" Charlie asks. "You know they'll find out. Trust me, news like this always spreads like wildfire, and not everyone will be so accepting."
"Then that's their fucking problem," Nick concludes as he tightens his hold on Charlie and kisses his shoulder. "Because I definitely want us to be together. Like, I want to be your boyfriend," he clarifies. "I want us to be able to hold hands or kiss whenever we want, which is hopefully always," he teases, "and I don't want to hide any of that."
"What?" Charlie sits up so fast that he nearly slides right off of Nick's lap.
Nick laughs fondly as he easily catches Charlie before he falls. "Do you want to be my boyfriend?" he asks hopefully. "We don't have to label it either if you're not ready to. We can just -"
"Yes!" Charlie shouts. "Oh my God, of course I do!" he adds while throwing his arms around Nick and kissing him senseless.
"Maybe I can even take the bus to school with you sometimes?" Nick suggests. "I could leave my house a few minutes earlier and meet you at the bus stop. I mean, if that's okay," he falters. "I'm sorry if that sounds a bit clingy; I just love the idea of spending more time with you."
"Let's see," Charlie pretends to weigh his options, "riding on a freezing bus while thinking about my boyfriend, or," he adds, as he reaches out to cup Nick's face, "actually being wrapped up in his arms. Wow, tough decision."
"Oh, I see how it is," Nick fake-glares as he pulls back and crosses his arms. "You just want to exploit my body heat."
"Can you blame me?" Charlie says as he nudges Nick's arms apart and settles against his chest. "I mean, it's not my fault that you're so hot," he whispers against Nick's ear before tilting his face over to kiss him again.
"Charlie!" Nick hisses, face going completely scarlet. "I can't believe you just said that!"
"You know, boyfriend," Charlie murmurs against Nick's flushed cheek as he kisses it softly, "pink is a rather attractive color on you too."
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