Chapter Text
August 1998
"Let's go to sleep! How about that, (y/n)?" your mom welcomed you to the bed, with your favorite story ready to be read as usual. But there was something different than usual, actually.
Her tone didn't sound as enthusiastic as before, her shoulders were dragging her mood down as well. The eye bags were deeper than normal and her skin as pale as a sheet of paper. Even though she would be generally speaking more cheered up by your presence after a day of hard work, that day seemed to have really exhausted her. You wondered if it would be worth asking, but kept quiet, following her request with a smile. You considered that it's better to spend time to her as you usually would instead. Maybe that would be enough.
"Comin'!" you cheerfully jumped on the bed besides her ready to hear the same story you listen to every night she was home. As you stayed next to her, you could feel the air less tense than before.
"No matter what," she began while kissing your forehead, "I'll always be there for you. I promise." Giving you a warm look, she took her pinky out waiting for you to seal the deal.
Your chest also lightened seeing that beautiful face full of love and support. "Me too, mama! I'll never leave you behind!" You both chuckled softly before getting comfortable in order for your mom to ready the story you hold so dearly in your heart.
You were trying to fall asleep in her arms, listening to her intriguingly calm voice. But there was something that couldn't let you fall asleep just yet. There seemed to be another noise coming in from now and then - a buzzing that kept you from going into the dream world. You wondered where that had been coming from but couldn't bring yourself to interrupt your mom as she looked like an angel sent from above to beckon you in a similar place.
You closed your eyes for a few minutes, trying as best as you could to sleep. Your mom suddenly stopped narrating and you could swear you heard her sighs. You decided to keep your eyes closed, until the light went off.
The buzzing from earlier intensified so much it seemed that there was a mosquito in your ear. There were sobs accompanying the annoying buzzed noise. A tear fell down next to you.
"What am I going to do?" she whispered with such disbelief. You scrunched your little hands into a fist next to your chest. The grief in her voice was so painful you wished you could do something about it, even though you knew nothing about what'd happened. You tried to think about something that could bring a smile on your mother's face. However, the buzzing kept going strong, occupying your mind and leaving no room for the thoughts.
You turned around, back facing your mom. You covered your ears, begging for the mosquito to leave you alone, but that didn't seem the case for the whole night.
The next day, the lack of sleep you suffered from could be seen by far. The dark circles under eyes would be quite unusual for a child. The pale face and angered expression you were wearing wouldn't help either. You worried everyone around you. The first thing in the morning was for your mom to take your temperature. Nothing out of ordinary for you beside your first all-nighter.
However, there was something weird on your mom's forearm. A few purplish bumps here and there. "Are those bruises?" you asked out loud without realizing.
She gave you a confused look, while glancing in the direction of your stare. "What do you mean?" She'd searches every inch of her skin, looking through them without a reaction. "There's nothing there, (y/n)." She tried to reassure you, but you could definitely see them.
You approached her, pointing them out only for her to be further confused and concerned at the same time. You tried touching them and only then she winced in pain. She looked at you in a greater confusion she never felt before.
"It did hurt..." your mom thought out loud." But I don't see any sign of a bruise..." She kept glancing back and forth to you and her forearm. "There are more?" She wanted to convince herself. You nodded affirmatively. "Where?"
You pointed another one out and she poked the spot only for her to wince once again at the touch that created the pain. She shook her head as if she was having a nightmare. "No..." her voice cracked and terror was taking over her composure. "This can't be..." She looked back at you, her face frightening you. It was a mix between fear and disgust, which normally wouldn't be worth your reaction. But this was a face you'd never seen before, leading to fear. You felt threatened by the look she gave you. You felt tear welling up the corners of your eyes.
The scared expression made your mom come back to her senses, her gaze softening. There was a slight hesitation before she could give you a reassuring hug. At the warm touch, tears fell down as you were crying in her arms.
"I'm sorry, (y/n)..." your mom whispered in your ear, hugging you tighter. “I am such a terrible mom..." She was having a mental breakdown as the scene played on.
The buzzing came once again and you felt haunted by it at this point. You broke the hug, looking around for the source. Only then, in broad daylight, you could see what kind of bug made that noise. Your eyes grew in horror at what you were seeing. It was as big as your head and could see it attached by its needle to your mother's other arm. Your mom was scratching that same area the ‘mosquito’ was drinking blood from. In shock, you tried to show your mom the creature, but there was nothing to be seen from her point of view. It was frustrating and terrifying. You were trying to understand why you could see it, but the other couldn't.
"(y/n)" Your attention was paid only to your mom now. "Whatever that is, you can't tell anyone about it." Her expression was stern and you could feel the seriousness that sentence held. Still, you wanted to understand.
"But-" you tried arguing, pressing further on the subject, only to be cut off.
"You must not tell anyone about it." Her tone was getting darker, the air stiffening. "Did you understand?"
With hesitation, you answered favorably to her, even making a promise about it. You didn't understand at that time what that was, but your mom's reaction made you realize it was indeed important.
That was the first encounter with such a thing, but certainly not the last one. Ever since that day, you could see all kind of creatures roaming around. It scared you, yes, but you promised not to tell a soul. And you kept it for a very long time.
March 2010
You finally got home after the graduation, placing the bouquet you'd received from your mother on the table. You got a vase for the flowers, carefully putting them for all of their brightness to be seen. It truly made the room seem livelier. It reminded you that there were better things to see in this life. In fact, every little thing that you saw beauty in brought a smile on those lips. It was so much easier to see the good and the pretty in other things after being able to also see something that not everyone else could ever even dream of.
You brushed the thought aside trying to focus on the gentle petals sprinkled with sparkling dots. It looked like morning dew, which made them seem even more dazzling. Daffodils, though simple in nature, accompanied by little drops, shined like fairy gold ready to be picked by the admirers. You liked them so much, ever since you were a kid and you were pleased to hear some of your friends did too. You would always give them out on the spring nights you went out with them, since daffodils grew right in front of your home. You hoped those moments wouldn't end; just as high school had.
You smiled at the memories you'd made with your high school friends. It warmed you up inside - the thought of them. You couldn't wait to go out with them to celebrate and commemorate those dearly held moments. In fact, you were waiting for them to call so you could go, but not until your mom would get home as well. You had bought a cake that you'd share together when she'd arrive since she had to go to the office soon after you took a photo after the ceremony.
She'd been awfully busy lately because of her job, but she worked hard for you. As a single mom, it had been a struggle to raise you in a society where the job would be a father's attribute, while taking care of a child would be a mother's. But, since there was no other choice, she had to fill in for both of them. It really hurt whenever you saw her overworked, but it had been all for you. That's the reason you always understood not to upset her. You had always been grateful for all the things she provided for you.
However, it was tiring her out as well... That thing on her arm didn't help either. You thought it would fly after a while and leave your mom alone. It never did. And it was quite clear to you that it wouldn't any sooner. It'd been like that for years. You always admired your mom for the strength she had. If it were you, you wouldn't have survived such a thing, you were sure of it. You witnessed what those things could do, and you knew that ‘mosquito’ was quite weak compared to others.
You never got to understand what it was, but you didn't know for sure if you truly wanted to find out either. "Ignorance is a bliss" you recalled your mother saying that whenever you got scared of them. She knew exactly what and when to tell you. She was your role model, and you'd follow her to the grave. That's what you'd tell yourself whenever the thought of losing her corrupted your mind.
As if a spell was broken off, the train of thoughts had reached its destination when the phone rang. You looked at the clock, realizing it was quite late. Concerned for your mom, you picked up the phone.
"(L/n) residence?" the voice on the other end didn't seem familiar. You confirmed and waited for them to continue. "Ms. (L/n) had fainted at work and is currently at the local hospital. Woul-"
Your mother? Hospital?
You felt dizzy, as if the whole sky crumbled and fell down on you. It was beyond your power to register what you'd just been told. Trying to regain your composure, however, you told the nurse you'd arrive as soon as possible.
This had never happened before ever since you had been aware of your surroundings as a child. Your mom was strong, she would wake up after a good sleep. She was just exhausted and wanted a break. You were sure of it. Or at least, you wanted to convince your concerned mind that everything would be alright.
As soon as you got to the hospital, you found out that your mom was clinically proven to have not a single health issue. But how would that be possible? She always looked exhausted to you. "There has to be something... She wasn't feeling well lately." you insisted that more tests would be done, but they informed you there was nothing wrong with your mother's body and they couldn't explain the reason she fainted. "If that's so, how come she fainted?" tears were starting to flood your vision.
"She might have had a shock of some sort, but nothing showed up on our tests that could be related to other causes." The doctor stated that. "I’m going to prescribe some supplements and she should take a little bit of rest just in case, but she will be completely fine afterwards. Don't worry." He wanted to calm you down, but you felt there was more than that.
The man wearing a white gown patted your shoulder. "She will be better. I promise you that." the frown of concern did disappear with that statement, even though sadness could be read in your eyes.
April 2010
But she didn’t… Days went by, your mother did wake up on that same day, but she looked even more dreaded on each day passing. She took those prescribed supplements, but it seemed to be in vain... Her cheekbones started showing up, face seemingly sucked into her skull. The thing on her arm seemed to get bigger and bigger as time took its course. It was horrifying. Each day you prayed it wouldn't be her last.
You knew this wasn't normal and you could feel it had something to do with the mosquito... In desperation, you tried to research the topic your mom had forbidden you to take a dive into. You were always listening to her, but this time you knew if you hadn't done it, it wouldn't be long until...
You tried at the local library to get more information on ghosts and other such creatures, but there didn't seem to be any of the kind you'd seen. As a last resort, you went to ask strangers on internet about it. There was an obscure forum about abnormalities and spirituality where someone had shared a similar story about seeing a creature that caused some people to die. Even though skeptical about its genuineness, it felt like the right place to ask.
You did sound crazy asking the question and you felt really dumb for doing it anyways, since it might be a joke some kid is pulling on other people. However, you didn't have much of a choice as the medical system had failed to be of any help in the matter.
You had little to no hope for this website. So, it came as a surprise to get such a quick response.
"I actually had a friend who suffered of a similar pain. She couldn't sleep well at night, feeling quite suffocated, but there was nothing wrong with her body physically. So she went to this monk that took her pain right away. He is the head of an association that helps people like your mom get rid of this unexplainable pain. This is the address. (Address) It is a bit costly, but it is definitely worth the try. I hope your mom gets well soon!"
Reading all of this seemed unreal. Could some random monk heal people of unseen things? Just like in the stories popular during Meiji? The fastness of the reply didn't look that trustworthy either... But what other chance did you have? What about the money? They said it would be expensive. You could take some from your savings for the university tuition and put it back while working as a cashier or something. But mom would kill you if she would know this... Would there be someone to kill you anyways if you didn't try? The thought of your mom gone made your heart beat faster and your hands tremble. You would never get over it. You had to have more moments like you had got so far with her. She was the only family you had...
It was time to repay for all the sacrifices she'd made for you up until then. And as a form to do so, you decided to head for a ‘trip’ to the said address with your mother. She wouldn't like this idea, but you were sure she'd understand after she would have been healed. Nothing else mattered any longer. Your mother’s safety became your priority.
A week passed by and you convinced your mom to join your ‘celebration trip’ to Kyoto. Even though you put it together behind her back in the span of 7 days, your mom had known for this trip to be scheduled way before graduation. You made it seem a surprise to pay her kindness for all these years but also to enjoy your time together since you would leave to university soon. You even planned to visit some of the temples including Kiyomizu-dera and Sanjuugen-dou, you reserved train and museum tickets ahead to make it look even more believable.
The thought of deceiving your mother sank your heart deeper in your chest, but you knew there was no other way. She didn’t want to be involved in anything related to what you could see. And you understood very well that. Had you been able to stop it, you would’ve done it long ago… A gentle squeeze on your hand brought you back to reality. You smiled back at her sick figure. Some nature wouldn’t hurt her. Yes, this was a mission to heal her, but she needed to enjoy her time there as well. And you made sure that it would.
In some way, the news of this sudden trip made you mom much livelier. You two couldn’t afford this when you were younger because she’d always been busy with work. After that incident, however, the higher-ups let her take a few days off in order to regain strength and rest for a while. That was very ‘kind’ of them, considering this was her first real holiday. Only you knew the effort and hard work she’d put in at her job.
You hoped dearly that the said monk would help your mom. Maybe this would be her second chance to give up on this never-ending job and take care of herself, living her own life. Not one for you, but for her.
The day had come. It was time to get this creature that had never left your mom’s side for years. It was time it let your mom free of suffering. You were appreciating where the association would be located – it made it look as if you were on your way to a Buddhist Temple. Hidden in the forest, you had the opportunity to further give the illusion that this was just another point in the itinerary you created for the trip.
As you reached your destination, a large building quite similar to a Buddhist temple appeared before you. It was unreal how it felt like it came out of thin air, since you hadn’t seen in until you faced it. The atmosphere surrounding it seemed still. No birds singing, no wind or breeze to blow – it almost felt like traveling between two different realms where you had to make a life changing decision. You weren’t getting a necessarily good vibe out of this, but you still wanted to proceed. You were so close to curing your mom.
“What temple is this?” your mom voiced out her thoughts. “It’s my first time seeing it.” She now looked at you with curious eyes. Since she worked for a traveling agency as a tour guide, she was intrigued to see a place she never saw before. “What’s it called?” she further pressed questions, but you honestly didn’t get to know the name. The message you received was rather vague and the place didn’t show up on regular maps.
“Uhm… I actually don’t recall right now, but I will tell you as soon as we get back to the hotel room.” You prayed your excuse would make sense to your mom. It didn’t seem she bought the painfully obvious lie but was curious of this mysterious aura the place gave. Looking around, the view kept her silent until the doors of the temple opened up as if beckoning both of you inside.
That alone made your whole skin crawl and blood inside swarm around strangely. “This place is cursed.” Your mouth slipped on its own. You had no idea if that was true or not, but that caught your mother’s attention.
“What do you mean by that?” she looked scared at the statement you’d just said.
“Cursed?” another voice joined the conversation. Goosebumps all over your body, this was not a good sign. You turned to the voice in order to properly face it. There was a young woman standing at the gate, looking quite clueless of our reactions to the sudden interruption. Something didn’t feel right. It wasn’t the fact that you didn’t expect people to be there, it was the fact that the person standing in front of you felt dangerous. “Nonsense!” the fair-haired woman laughed it off, trying to lighten the mood. “Please, come in. Master is waiting for you.”