Work Text:
Peter was tired.
Grief was an odd thing, draining and pressing down heavily on his shoulders. He had lost Gwen only a month ago, and he couldn’t remember the last time he slept for more than two hours. He replayed that night every time he closed his eyes, waking up and muffling his screams in his pillow.
The police and the fire department had shown up eventually, and he had to scramble for his mask, watching as the uniformed men entered, approaching him almost carefully. They had looked down at Gwen, at the way he was still holding her.
He’d left when the paramedics got there, he couldn’t go through the explanations and the questions, and they let him. He had broken down once he was back in the city again, watching the sun come up on a rooftop, as he pulled on the clothes he collected. He didn’t remember doing it, but there was a lot that passed him by in the days leading up to the funeral. It all became a blur.
Aunt May left him alone for the most part, only bringing him tea whenever the door wasn’t locked, but he knew she was worried, so he tried to go outside at least once a week. And so he visited Gwen’s grave once a week, for at least a year, careful to go on days when he knew that Gwen’s family wouldn’t be there.
He was unable to face them, even if they didn’t know about his involvement. He had hurt them twice, and him being unable to keep the promise he made to Gwen’s father had hurt her too. It made the nightmare come to life, and he wasn’t ready to talk to Helen Stacy, maybe he’d never be.
The suit had been in the closet for over a year, but eventually, he took it out. Crime had increased with his absence, and when he came down to watch tv with Aunt May, he noticed people asking for his assistance, wondering where Spider-Man went and why he wasn’t fighting crime anymore.
He realized that this wasn’t just about him anymore, and that the city needed him. He had taken his time, but there were bigger threats at bay now, threats that would roam free and cause more deaths like Gwen’s death: unnecessary and painful ones.
He could prevent those, as Spider-Man, and while Peter Parker could still mourn, it was important that Spider-Man was the person to prevent mourning for the citizens of New York. He would use this as a motivator to keep criminals at bay, and protect the people of this city, much like he had done before.
Because above everything, with great power comes great responsibility.