Chapter Text
“Promise you’ll stay by my side the entire time? You won’t wander even for a moment?” Shen Qingqiu scrutinized Luo Binghe’s long perfected white-sheep-can-do-no-wrong expression from behind his fan as they sat in the bamboo house together. Luo Binghe nodded enthusiastically and held Shen Qingqiu’s feee hand to his chest.
“Yes, Shizun! This disciple sincerely promises! This disciple won’t let go of Shizun for a second!” Shen Qingqiu sighed, after spending a genuinely abhorrent amount of B-points to finally tell his husband the truth about being a transmigrator, he’d been given the bonus stories option titled ‘A Whole New World’. Basically, it would let Shen Qingqiu and his husband travel back to his original world for 24 hours— with a list of fan service-y activities to complete within the timeframe of course, because nothing involving the system was ever easy, was it?
“Well, then I suppose we can… but really Binghe, we can’t draw attention to ourselves, I’d hate to spend our 24 hours in prison.” Not to mention the loss of points failing to complete activities would bring.
“This disciple will be no more distracting then a fly on a wall.” Binghe said innocently, “and if we are arrested, I’m sure I can just break us out, even without spiritual powers.” That was another thing, for the duration of the 24 hours, there were rules.
If they try to spiritual or demonic energy, they get sent back. If they try to tell people about the transmigration, they get sent back. If they kill anyone, they get sent back. Most to Shen Qingqiu’s disappointment, if they talk to anyone he knew before transmigrating, they get sent back.
So, no make-up goodbyes to family members, but he could at least find out how his favorite tv shows ended, right?
‘System, can you show me the list of goals, before I accept the mission?’
7 goals will be given throughout the duration of the mission, the host will be given a new goal upon completion of the former, and the first will be given when the mission starts o(^▽^)o
‘Guess that’s a no, then, damn useless system’ Shen Qingqiu thought.
“So, will Shizun take us to see his home?” Luo Binghe’s face was lit up in anticipation, and Shen Qingqiu’s annoyance softened. He knew how deeply his husband wished to know about him and his past, how curious and full of wonder he’d been at Shen Qingqiu’s origins when he’d first learned. Luo Binghe got over the whole being lied to for nearly his whole life thing surpringly quickly, saying that Shizun is Shizun no matter where he’s from. The unabashed declarations of love had made Shen Qingqiu so embarrassed he wanted to never show his face again for several solid minutes, but he’d always made perfectly clear his devotion to his husband.
“No time like the present then, I guess…” Shen Qingqiu took his husband’s hand and accepted the mission from the system. They both then promptly passed out and a familiar feeling of falling came over Shen Qingqiu, much like when he’d first transmigrated to PIDW.
They woke up slowly, on grass. Luo Binghe’s hand was still tightly would with his own and he looked up towards a sky full of familiar stars. Stars he hadn’t seen in so many years.
Mission is now starting at 12am! Complete all 7 goals before 12am tomorrow and receive a reward of 500 B-points!! (^_−)−☆
“Shizun?” Luo Binghe asked, already sitting up and helping Shen Qingqiu to do so as well.
Shen Qingqiu looked around, they appeared to be in some kind of public park, and he might’ve actually cried if it had had more time to settle in once his eyes laid on the pavement walkways. Pavement!! Of cement!!!!
“We’re really here.” Shen Qingqiu placed his hand on Luo Binghe’s arm and stared, emotions rushing through them. Even more emotions swirled when he looked down at himself. It was actually himself. Shen Yuan.
…in the exact outfit he died in. Creepy.
But not creepy enough to not be excited about!!
“Shizun looks different.” Luo Binghe frowned, running a finger over Shen Yuan’s cheek. “Like you did in your other body, but still different.”
Shen Yuan nodded, “Yes, this is what I looked like originally. I’d based that body off this one. It’s crazy to actually be back in it.”
For the host’s convenience in completing goals, the host has been given his original appearance, make sure to let the protagonist admire you in all your forms!! ٩( 'ω' )و
‘Oh, of course the system makes it horny. It always finds a way to make things horny’ Shen Yuan almost rolled his eyes, but instead he focused back on his husband.
“What do you think?” Shen Yuan had never really cared about his appearance in his first life, and then he’d been given natural cultivator novel character beauty in his second, and he suddenly found himself a little self conscious being looked at so intently by Luo Binghe, ie. the most perfect looking man in literal existence.
“Shizun is beautiful whichever body he’s in.” Luo Binghe said shyly, a mix of real timidness and the flirty foe-coyness he used. Either way, Shen Yuan could tell it was sincere and smiled.
Time for the first goal!!! The host and the protagonist must read PIDW fanfiction together! ♡\(//∇//)\
Shen Yuan could’ve groaned. Luo Binghe’s noticed his sour expression and asked what was wrong.
“We just got our first mission. We have to… read fan works based on the novel you were originally from together.” It wasn’t so bad, after all, Luo Binghe had definitely read fanfiction that was actually about the two of them, and Shen Yuan had read plenty of PIDW fanfic in his time. Maybe they could read some fluff or something?
No! The host must read at least one smut fic to complete the goal!
‘That wasn’t in the description!!’ Damn system changing rules to however suited it.
Why does the host despise love? (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)
‘Oh stop crying, who are you, Binghe?’
Said Luo Binghe immediately perked up, “Where can we find it?” Shen Yuan thought for a moment, he didn’t exactly have his computer anymore.
“We can probably connect to the internet at a public library. Come on.” Luo Binghe obediently followed as Shen Yuan checked any maps he could find around until he managed to lead them to a library, pointedly ignoring any strange looks he got from people when they saw how he was dressed.
“If anyone asks, just tell them you’re a cosplayer.” Shen Yuan told him, it was perfectly reasonable, plenty of people went around in full cosplay randomly in the middle of the night, right? Luo Binghe didn’t really understand what a cosplayer was, but he nodded agreeably and continued switching between observing the unfamiliar world around him and gazing lovingly at Shen Yuan.
Eventually, they managed to get to a library computer, and Shen Yuan was very thankful technology hadn’t advanced so fast he couldn’t use a computer anymore, that would actually bring him to tears.
He quickly searched up Ao3 on the browser and searched put in the search filters include— fandom:proud immortal demon way; rating:general audiences (he still had to mentally prepare himself to read smut of Luo Binghe and whatever wife they’d find, while Binghe was right next to him); exclude— characters:Shen Qingqiu | Shen Jiu.
“Why are you excluding yourself?” Luo Binghe asked, frowning.
“Remember what Shen Jiu was like in the original?” ‘And what happened to him’, he doesn’t say. Luo Binghe’s frown immediately deepens, likely thinking just the same thing, and he nods.
“What does the slash mean?” Luo Binghe asks.
Shen Yuan scratches his cheek and looks pointedly away from his husband (that he has had intense sec with many, many times) as he explains. “It means in a relationship, specifically an… intimate one.”
“Why am I paired with Ning-Shijie? And Liu-shimei? And… Sha Hualing???” Luo Binghe looked increasingly confused and horrified as he looked at the relationship tags on, unfortunately, just the first fic listed that took up the whole screen with its tags. He then turned back to Shen Yuan with an expression of dismay.
“Haha, you remember how I told you you had quite the harem in the original novel?”
“No!” He said quietly. Shen Yuan nodded quickly. “All of them?” He nodded more intensely.
“Can we read a different one?”
“Yes, but keep in mind, we’ll have to read smut at some point, and this isn’t even that yet.”
In the end they picked a fluff fic of Liu Mingyan/Sha Hualing that had nothing to do with either of them, and mostly made fun of how OOC it was.
“Sha Hualing isn’t nearly annoying enough here.” Luo Binghe said, resting his chin on Shen Yuan’s shoulder as he read, “She can’t go 3 minutes without picking some kind of fight unless she’s complaining about work or being threatened.” Shen Yuan let out a quiet laugh.
“Well it’s not like she was such an overworked employee in the original, Binghe.” luo Binghe made a hm noise and kept reading.
“You said we have to read smut, what’s that?” Luo Binghe asked when they finished.
“Erm, that’s, smut is papapa.” Luo Binghe smiled, endlessly endeared by his husband’s continued refusal to say the word ‘sex’ in public. Really, as if he didn’t say the most shameless, lewd, utterly enticing things when the two of them were having sex.
“Then, I’d rather not read about Sha Hualing of Liu-Shimei this time. Or Ning-Shijie.” Shen Yuan agreed thoroughly.
“Yes, definitely not. Maybe some of the ladies you don’t know?” Binghe was quiet for a moment.
“If Shizun wants, we can.” He was using the tone Shen Yuan easily recognized as the ‘ask me what I want’ voice.
“Binghe, is there something else you’d like to read with this master?”
“Well, if Shizun doesn’t mind, could we read something about us?”
“We already talked about how anything with Shen Jiu is going to be really weird, Binghe.” Shen Yuan looked over at his husbands puppy-dog pleading eyes.
“But Shizun told this diciole about all the filters on this… website, shouldn’t there be something?” Shen Yuan thought about it for a moment. He supposed considering how popular PIDW was, there must be some BingJiu fics that aren’t too bad.
“We can look.” And look they did. And Shen Yuan had to explain more words to Luo Binghe than he’d ever desired to in his life. Fuck you system for putting him in the position to have to explain vore, frottage, shibari and water sports. Shen Yuan didn’t think about how Luo Binghe had no questions about sex pollen. They both were very familiar with that.
Shen Yuan didn’t acknowledge that he was actually a little aroused with the discussion of shibari, nope, he wasn’t going to think about that at all.
Eventually they found a BingJiu smut fic that finally didn’t have any tags he was too opposed to (cough cough human stick couch couch), and they read it together.
Luo Binghe sighed, “It’s just not the same when it’s not really about Shizun.” Disappointment was evident in his voice.
“It’s ok, we can do it for real later.” Luo Binghe perked up and kissed Shen Yuan’s cheek.
“Shizun is too good to this disciple.”
“Hm, yes, he is.” Before they could continue, likely with Luo Binghe getting impatient and pulling him into a library bathroom or outside, the system sounded off.
Congratulations! First goal completed!! ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
‘Can you wait, system?’
Nope! Are you ready for the second goal?
‘Are you going to tell me anyways?’
Of course! (*^ω^*)
‘Go ahead then, I guess’
Second Goal: The host must play the pocky game with the protagonist!
“Shizun? You look annoyed again, did the system tell you the next goal?” Luo Binghe, ultra IQ protag extraordinaire, guesses again.
“Yep.” Shen Yuan leaned his head on Luo Binghe’s.
“What is it?”
Shen Yuan sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day, “I’ll explain in a bit.”