Archive of Our Own

Honeymoon suite.

It was just a name—a denominator. A regular room with an enormous bed that would obviously not be shared. The name didn’t matter.

Whatever Dar had imagined seeing that had led him to believe she and Han would want a honeymoon suite worked as well as any other cover. All they had to do was avoid snapping at each other too much while they were in public, and it’d do the trick.

The service droid kept droning on about all the features of the honeymoon suite, what their stay at the honeymoon suite included, what they could request to be brought at their honeymoon suite, and the damned honeymoon suite seemed to spin around Leia.

‘Please do let us know if you need anything at all, and enjoy your stay!’ the droid said, putting out the lighter at the end of a finger before marching out of the honeymoon suite.

‘This is… something, huh?’ Han said, looking at the polished sculpture the droid had been standing next to. Two beings of indefinite race, embracing. Of course. The purplish black stone it was made of had a mesmerizing quality, as if an undercurrent made the colours shift just under the surface. It didn’t exactly help Leia’s increasing dizziness.

‘Yeah, well…’

She walked around the rest of the apartment, taking it in. The suite was all Core minimalist luxury, devoid of personality, yet undeniably high-class. 

‘What? Not fancy enough for you, Princess?’

Leia turned to glare at him. Yes, she would definitely need to start practicing the not-snapping-at-him deal soon, because he was doing his best to drive her crazy lately. It seemed as if he had gotten worse after Hubin, as if it was her fault that he’d thought she was inviting him to her room to—

No, it was probably her imagination. He had always been this annoying. She was just… more responsive to it, lately.

‘This is where you’ll be sleeping,’ she told him, pointing at a sofa large enough to accommodate him that sat in the main room. Right in front of it, a panoramic window gave them a view of the Lanz Carpo night they’d just come from.

‘Obviously,’ Han muttered, loud enough for her to hear.

Inside, it was too warm for Leia’s clothes. Tugging at the high cowl neck of her dress, she opened the door to the walk-in closet and motioned for Han to follow. She remembered the droid mentioning “complimentary garments” they could take advantage of to attend the hotel’s formal dinner. They probably weren’t the first, nor the last, guests at the Grand Regent Hotel who showed up in dusty travel attire with no suitcases in sight, with the planet’s reputation.

‘If we’re going to infiltrate this place, I suppose we should try to blend in,’ Leia said, running a hand through the impeccable array of clothes in various styles and fabrics that filled the hangers at each side of the room.

‘If you say so.’

Leia turned around and nearly bumped into Han’s chest.

‘Oh. Sorry,’ she said, feeling the heat creep up her cheeks as she took a step back. She really needed to get out of these clothes. ‘Did you find anything good?’

Han scratched the back of his neck and shrugged, looking as uncomfortable as she felt, although probably for different reasons. ‘No, I don’t know, this—not really my style.’

‘Yes, that’s exactly the point,’ Leia said, rolling her eyes, ‘that it’s not your style. Here, let me.’

She stepped around him and started rummaging through that side of the closet, pulling out several shirts and a couple of trousers for him to try on, along with two jackets that weren’t too different from Han’s usual cut. She could feel him watching her as she did that, and the heat of their bodies was making the modestly-sized closet even warmer. Sweat was pooling under her arms and between her breasts, rolling down in droplets that tickled her sides. Two pairs of shoe options was all she could manage before she shoved everything into Han’s arms and stepped out.

‘What about you?’ Han called after her.

‘Why don’t you try those on while I shower?’ Leia asked over her shoulder, slowing down now that she’d put some distance between them and trying to sound nonchalant, as if her body was not currently melting.

‘Okay…’ Han said, giving her one last concerned look before he ducked back inside the closet.

Bracing herself on the sculpture, Leia took a deep breath. A pleasant scent she couldn’t define permeated the suite; the lungful of it instantly made her feel calmer. Her skin, still flushed, tingled pleasantly. Her thoughts dissolved like clumps of sugar in water and, somehow, Dar Champion’s face replaced them. He’d certainly grown up since she’d last seen him, tan muscle filling out his former boyish frame. No matter what Han thought, she didn’t have feelings for Dar anymore—it was truly over between them. But he was still her attractive ex-boyfriend who happened to be a gentleman and whom she’d broken up with for reasons that had nothing to do with him. That had to be why she suddenly couldn’t make herself not think about him.

‘You still there?’ Han’s voice managed to pull her away from those thoughts. 

He was back in the doorway, wearing a soft green shirt that she had picked out because it complemented his eyes. In her hurry, she had missed the small detail of its plunging neckline, which currently exposed most of Han’s tanned, hirsute chest. Leia’s vision swam and she took another bracing breath, only to feel all of her blood rushing down her body. 

‘So, I don’t think I’ll be wearing this one,’ Han added dryly, raising an eyebrow at her.

‘Sounds good,’ Leia squeaked out, rushing into the bedroom in as large strides as she could manage and closing the door firmly behind her. If he found it odd that she had now escaped him twice, she couldn’t care.

What was the matter with her? She had seen Han with less clothes than that—his entire torso bare, and his arms… It was nothing. He was annoying, she was—annoyed with him. His stupid smug face, and his stupid long arms that looked ridiculous with his sleeves rolled up, and his stupid little remarks that came out of his stupid lips that she definitely hated and did not need sucking on her—

This was getting out of hand.

She needed to cool down, get her head on straight and focus on the mission. And the mission was to—what? They were at a hotel. They were supposed to get dressed and go—meet Dar Champion? To tell him to… tell him to join her and Han. Yes! That was it. To join them, in this honeymoon suite. And have sex with them.

No! Leia groaned, pressing a fist against her forehead as she tried to divert her blood from giving her clit any more autonomy over her entire self than it already had.

Almost frantically, she stripped off every last piece of fabric, leaving them in a heap on the floor. Her entire body was covered in sweat and shivered as her skin came in contact with the air. The shower would help. Wipe off every last drop of perspiration and whatever else was going on with her.

She opened a cabinet and took a soft towel from the stack on the first shelf she saw. Trying to distract herself, she perused the bottom shelves to see what else they had to offer. A large black case sat in one of them; kneeling, Leia pressed the button to open it, trying to guess what kind of usual hotel amenities she would find.

None of her guesses were right.

Several trays rose up from the depths of the case, exhibiting their contents like a jewelry box. Brand-new, shiny sex toys of all shapes and sizes were fitted neatly into each tray’s padded bottom, along with different types of lube and boxes of condoms, each with a price tag that would be included in the bill should you take it out. Leia’s breath hitched in her throat at the sight of a particular nozzle-shaped device.

If she did that… if she could just masturbate… then she could get it over with, get herself under control. She was sexually frustrated, that was all. Nothing wrong with admitting that; it had been a long time since she’d had sex, and she was currently around two people who—yes, that was it.

But no, she couldn’t. She could not add a sex toy to her hotel tab that her ex-boyfriend was paying for, even if said ex-boyfriend thought she was on her honeymoon. With Han. She would not need a sex toy if she could just—

Her clit throbbed at the image that popped into her head and she whimpered.

No! she thought furiously, even as another part of her countered with Yes.

Shutting the case closed, then the cabinet, Leia got into the shower, nearly forgetting to put on a shower cap to keep her hair from getting wet. There were enough wet things she had to worry about already.

Although the ‘fresher was devoid from the soothing scent and the water dissipated the remains of it that clung to Leia’s body, she felt herself slowly glide down from her high. She refused to touch herself, to let herself think of Han that way right now. No matter how badly she wanted to.

Wrapped in a fluffy robe, her sexual tension mostly evaporated under the hot spray of the shower, Leia stepped out of the ‘fresher feeling almost like herself again. 

In the main room, the perfume felt even stronger than before.

In the main room, Han was pacing.

The clothes he had been trying on were scattered around the room, over coffee tables, chairs, and the sofa. He was barefoot and bare-chested, but wearing one of the pairs of trousers she’d selected for him. Which was tented.

He’s hard, Leia realized, her own arousal stealing over her once more. He’s feeling this, too.

Han paused and shut his eyes tightly, one hand winding through his hair and pulling, like he was trying to make his erection go away. But why were they even fighting against it? His naked, glistening skin called to her, made her palms itch with the need to touch him. The bulge under his trousers made her cunt tighten around her clit.

Then he opened her eyes and saw her.

‘Leia,’ he said with an animal growl as he strode towards her. His face was a grimace of the same physical pain and longing she felt, his large pupils fixed hungrily on her. A bubble of thrill filled her stomach at the thought of him feasting on her. He took a step back and almost stumbled, holding up a hand and looking away. ‘I don’t—I’m sorry—you need to go—’

His reaction made her own head remember she had to sober up, but she frowned.

‘Where would I go?’

‘I don’t know!’ he snapped, picking up one of the rumpled shirts and covering his crotch in a sudden attempt at modesty. ‘I don’t know, okay? But you need to go, ‘cause I really, really want to—’

He made a strangled noise in the back of his throat and turned his back to her, pacing like a caged animal again.

‘Want to what?’ Leia asked, moving to the center of the room. Her mind seemed sharper now, but it contained a single thought. She reached out to touch Han’s arm and he jumped at the contact, but held her gaze. Softer, she repeated, ‘Want to what, Han?’

‘Fuck you,’ he whispered, jaw clenching around the word as if he were trying to prevent it from escaping.

‘But I have nowhere else to go,’ Leia said, tensing her own hands, her entire body, so she wouldn’t just wrap herself around him, and reaching for the belt of her robe instead. ‘So I think you should just fuck me.’

Her robe fell off her shoulders and pooled around her feet, and Han swore loudly, bending at the waist, as his eyes settled on her naked body.

‘Are you trying to kill me?’

‘Not everything is about you, hotshot,’ she said, her voice constrained with the effort to keep it from shaking. ‘I need it as much as you, I’m—we could go into different rooms and take care of it ourselves. Or we can just… help each other here. I mean… I already saw…’

She gestured at his crotch. What would be the point in pretending anymore? And if she was honest, masturbating wouldn’t cut it anymore. She needed the tall, scruffy smuggler standing half-naked in front of her, and she needed him now.

‘Now,’ Leia repeated, this time out loud. A command.

There was a huff of air, and she barely saw the modesty shirt flying out of the way before she was being lifted off her feet, her arms and legs acting on instinct as they wrapped around Han’s body, mouth opening hungrily to his. They spent several seconds like that, devouring each other, his fingers digging into the flesh of her ass, her nails trying to peel off the skin of his back, until that first drag was enough to take the edge off their delirious craving. Han maneuvered them to the sofa and laid her down, fitting himself between her legs. She threaded her fingers through his hair as he leaned in for another kiss, his tongue trying to tear her lips off. He moved down without warning and captured a stiff nipple with his mouth, and her fingernails tightened around his skull as she moaned, hips arching into him as they sought a point of contact.

‘You have any idea how long I wanted to do that?’ Han asked in a husky voice, teeth nipping at her throat. ‘Wanted to shut you up with my mouth?’

Trying to find her voice, Leia tugged at his hair until he was looking her in the face.

‘You know how many times I’ve wanted to shut you up by sitting on your face?’ she breathed out.

The smirk on his face suddenly turned into a grin, all hungry teeth.

‘That can be arranged.’

Han sat back, tugging at her hands until she followed and let him slide his still clothed legs under her, tugging until her hips were hovering over his chest.

‘You sure?’ Leia asked, vaguely aware that she should feel more nervous about this than she really was, just trying to keep herself from passing out in anticipation.

‘Fuck, Your Worship,’ he muttered, his hands stroking her legs and hips. A finger slid under her curls and traced her labia, spreading her generous wetness to her clit. She sucked in a breath. ‘Yeah, I’m sure I want to eat you out.’

He pulled his finger out and brought it to his mouth, sucking on it as if he’d just dipped it in a pot of honey, his eyes locked on her. That was nearly enough to undo her. It took her a split second to move all the way up to his mouth, and then his tongue was on her and everything was good.

‘Fuck, Han,’ Leia moaned, one arm locked around the back of the sofa, knees half-bent to avoid smothering him, rocking on that wonderful, warm slickness that both soothed and inflamed every one of her nerve endings as she let out curses and encouragements alike. His tongue ran around and over and between her lips, pausing to nip at the sensitive skin of her thighs before fully tending to her clit. 

‘Goddess yes, right there— harder. Don’t let go now,’ she begged as her cunt throbbed and her muscles clenched, and she let her orgasm overtake her until she thought she would pass out, crying out his name as she came.

Han was nibbling and kissing her thighs while she tried to catch her breath, slumped against the back of the sofa.

‘You taste so good, sweetheart,’ he mumbled. Leia looked down at him, and he grimaced. ‘Don’t want you to—if you don’t want to—but I feel like I’m gonna die. Real soon.’

Leia nodded. Her legs felt like jelly, her clit too sensitive to touch, but she still wanted more. Moving down his legs, she undid his trousers and pulled down his boxer briefs. Her hand caught his cock like a pet that might run off, and she stroked it gently, understanding its pain. 

‘Gods, you’re killing me,’ Han growled.

A white pearl glistened on the tip. Bending down, she swirled her tongue around the head. Then, she licked it clean and took it into her mouth.

‘No! ’ Han whimpered, legs twitching under her. Leia pulled her mouth off just before he came fast and hard over her chest, and she blinked in surprise. Han’s head was tipped back, chest heaving. ‘Sorry. I didn’t—’

‘It’s fine,’ she said with a breathless laugh. As if she could fault him for that.

‘Kriff,’ Han breathed out when he lifted his head to look at her. His hair was all rumpled from her handiwork, and the desire lingering on his face was enough to rekindle her desire. ‘If I had anything left I’d be coming all over again.’

Leia wrinkled her nose and stood up. ‘Don’t be trashy, we’re not in a porn holo.’

‘Well, I’d say sorry for not being as refined as your ex, Princess,’ Han said, getting to his feet and pushing his clothes all the way off, ‘but it wasn’t his pretty mouth getting you off a minute ago.’

Cradling her face with one hand, he bent down to kiss her, rough and possessive, and she answered in kind, the feeling of his mouth still fresh on her clit. Leia bit his bottom lip once, then grabbed at his wrists and tugged as she walked backwards.

‘Where we going?’ Han asked, his lips tilting up in an intrigued smirk.

‘I’m going to wash this off in the shower because it feels disgusting,’ Leia told him, ‘and you’re going to look for condoms.’

‘I like that plan,’ he said, letting her lead him into the bedroom. Once there, however, his arms pulled her into him again, and it was hard for Leia to hold on to any one thought not related to how vital it was that they had sex again and forever. She felt as if she was struggling against a tractor beam.

‘Wait,’ she gasped, pushing him away. ‘Shower. One second. Check the bottom shelf of that cabinet.’

‘Okay,’ Han said, diving for her again. Leia held up a hand and pressed it against his mouth, holding him back.

‘Go. Now.’

‘Fine,’ he grunted, pouting at her. She ran to the shower before she could change her mind.

Leia stepped into the hot spray for the second time that night, feeling both more wired and in control than she had before. We should have done this a very long time ago, she thought as she lathered her chest. Why didn’t we do this before?

She couldn’t think of a single reason.

The shower screen slid open and Han stepped in. She took a minute to really look at his entire naked body, from his large feet to his fleshy calves and toned legs, his strong arms and broad chest, the happy trail of hair that dampened as he stepped under the water, dripping and running in rivulets down his cock.

‘Got a surprise for you, sweetheart,’ he said, making Leia look up. He held up his hand and she saw it: the small, tear-shaped device, glossy dark red with a golden nozzle at the top, that she had seen—and struggled not to take—earlier.

‘Han, no—we’ll have to pay for it,’ she protested, even as her muscles twitched with want.

‘I’ll pay for anything you want, baby,’ he said, licking his lips as his eyes roamed over her body. Leia moved so that she was pressed against the wall and he stepped in front of her. She leaned forward and kissed his chest, lips closing over a nipple, letting her teeth graze it before she licked it. His free hand tightened on her waist as he reacted to her, then he moved it down until it was cupped between her legs. His fingers slid between her labia, strumming as he mumbled, ‘You’re so wet, kriffing hells, you’re so wet.’

Leia heard a buzzing, then felt as if someone had plugged her into an electrical socket. Gasping, she lifted one leg to give him better access, her hips bucking into the pulsating nozzle.

‘You look so fucking beautiful, Leia. Just wanna make you come over and over again. Just want you to fuck me until I die, ‘cause I don’t think I can stop if I don’t,’ Han said, his mouth pressed against her temple. She dug her fingers into his arm, his words and the increased pace of the toy and his fingers inside her making her body curl and tense once more, her pulse beating hard, deep in her core.

‘Fuck me, Han. Take me to the bed and fuck me,’ she cried out, tightening at first, then collapsing against his chest. She hadn’t noticed before, but the tile behind her was cold and it made her shiver.

Han tried to shove the sex toy into the nearest shelf, knocking not only it but several bars of soap and small bottles of shampoo to the floor, but neither of them cared as he picked her up and carried her, dripping, out of the ‘fresher.

He threw her sidelong onto the mattress. Leia’s chest rose and fell, and she felt her body soaking the duvet under her. Had she gotten her hair wet? She’d said she wouldn’t get it wet. Had the room been the same pale blue colour before?

Han finished putting on a condom and crawled on his hands and knees over her, and she pushed herself up on one elbow to wrap her free arm around his neck as his hands moved over her. She frowned with the sudden awareness that her body seemed to be moving several steps ahead while her mind was trying to catch up, but she shook it off.

‘I need you,’ she said, kissing the scar on his chin. His eyes were so close, she could see the different hues of grey and green in his irises, and the vulnerability that passed over them. Then he blinked and blindly reached for her knees, pulling them over his shoulders before sinking into her so hard it made her fall back against the mattress with a gasp. He thrust slow but deep into her, making her feel every inch of him as he filled her and pulled back, her swollen, worn-out clit hating to love the renewed friction. ‘You fuck me so good.’

‘That’s all I’ll ever want to do,’ Han growled, pressing a kiss into the inside of her knee before he increased the pace. His hands holding onto her ass, he angled her hips just so he hit the right spot. Leia crossed her ankles behind his head as her muscles clenched around him and she moved in sync, clutching at the duvet and breathing hard until her body felt like it was dissolving into steam except for a solid, throbbing point where she merged with Han, and she came hard as he shuddered with his own release.

Leia stayed sprawled on the bed as she was, eyes closed, waiting for her heart to stop thumping inside her chest while Han took care of the condom. Then he crawled back next to her and she turned over to let him spoon her. He nuzzled her neck, one arm wrapped around her waist, caressing her abdomen softly, with no expectation of anything else. And thank goodness for that—she didn’t think she could take any more right now. She was tired, but she was finally sated as well, content to just rest like this with Han.

With Han.

Who she’d just had sex with.

I’ve just had sex with Han Solo.

Leia rolled over her back slowly, feeling almost as if she was waking up from a dream. She felt cold. Damp. The duvet under her was absolutely drenched, in fact—which was a huge no-no in hotels—but her mind latched onto that only for the second it took her to face Han.

He was frowning slightly to himself, and he tucked his chin in and drew his head back to better look at her.

‘Leia?’ he asked, his voice uncertain, drawing his arm back as slowly and carefully as if he’d just disrupted a nest of vrelts. ‘Did we just… was I just…?’

She could tell by the way his eyes twitched that he was making an effort not to look down at their bodies, but he knew just as she did that they were completely naked. Had been completely naked for a while now. Having sex. And she knew this, she remembered it, but in another sense… it was just now that she was fully aware of it. Very, acutely aware of it.

Leia pushed herself away from him, hands vainly grabbing for something to cover herself with. When she couldn’t pull the duvet from under Han, she settled for scrambling as far away from him as possible, covering her body with her hands. Her blood was rushing up so suddenly as she got vivid flashes of what had just happened that she was afraid of passing out from the shock.

‘How—I’m—’ She stumbled over her words, mostly because she didn’t know what to say. There was no point in asking what had happened and when or how; she remembered it all. Yet she felt as if someone else had taken the reins of her body for a spin and was just now handing them back.

Han was getting up from the bed, too, grabbing a throw pillow to cover himself and hunching over.

‘Are you—are you okay? I think I was—might’ve been—rough…’

‘Yeah, I’m—’ Leia waved off the rest of her reply. As a matter of fact, she felt sore, but it was the least of her problems now. Her voice wobbled. ‘I don’t understand.’

‘Okay. Okay.’ 

Han held up a hand and moved, sideways, towards the cabinet. He cringed when he saw the still open box of sex paraphernalia, but grabbed two towels and kicked the door shut again. He threw one to Leia before losing the throw pillow and wrapping the spare towel around his waist. From a rational point of view, modesty was ridiculous at this point. They had done more than seeing each other’s bodies until very recently. Leia still took the towel gratefully and covered herself. She felt violated, but was it a violation if she had consented—enthusiastically—to everything? Not just consented, but initiated it. And Han was clearly as confused as she was. So why did she feel like somebody had taken advantage of her?

‘Shit, Leia,’ Han blurted out. His pupils were back to their normal size, but his eyes were wild in a different way. ‘What the hell did we do? Kriff, I know—I know what we did, but I wasn’t—I didn’t—or did I—I don’t—’

‘We’re on the same wavelength for once, then,’ Leia said dryly. If she was certain of anything, it was that Han had not roofied her. Hearing him unhelpfully echoing her own thoughts was somewhat of a relief, though. It meant it wasn’t just her who’d lost temporary control of herself.

But the relief was short-lived. Here she was, standing across from a man she’d known for three years, a man she had refused to care about at first, refused to allow to care for her, one of the few people who had ever seen her as just Leia. A man she had fought side by side with, survived the worst day of her life with and then some. A man she’d increasingly had feelings for that she’d tried to shut the door on, telling herself she couldn’t spare the time, the energy, the commitment that a relationship, even a purely physical one, would take. A man who didn’t even know what he wanted, and who plainly had the same misgivings she did about them starting any sort of relationship.

And now they had skipped all of that and fucked.

It both simplified things and made everything a million times more complicated.

‘Should we—I think we need to… talk—’ Han said, but Leia barely heard him as she tried to remember what she had been doing just before they—

‘The mission,’ she said, suddenly feeling cold. ‘We were here on a mission, I was supposed to get dressed so we could go and—this dinner—I was going to try and find the comms room—’

‘Right. Yeah. I was trying on clothes.’

‘Fuck! ’ Leia screamed in frustration. ‘We need to get going right now!’

She started marching out of the room, but Han darted forward and caught her arm. Leia flinched and he let her go when her eyes dropped to where his hand had wrapped around her bare arm as if he’d let a heat mark. It was a strange feeling, remembering being so close not long ago, the feel and taste of his skin still fresh in her mind, yet feeling like she had no right to it, nor he to whatever memories of her he held. Leia felt as if she was going crazier by the second.

‘We really gonna go out there and act like nothin’s happened?’ Han snapped, scowling at her.

‘Yes,’ she hissed. ‘The mission comes first. The rebellion comes first. You know that. Whatever we—whatever happened, we can figure it out later.’

She left him standing there and crossed the main room to shut herself into the closet. With a clear head now and free of the distraction that was Han in close quarters, she rummaged through the hangers and tried to find suitable attire. She was too frazzled, too confounded by what had just happened, to pay too much attention, though. A gown in pale tones of pink with flared sleeves seemed like a good enough choice; Leia found a pair of white boots and a necklace to go with it and got dressed before she rebraided her woefully damp hair. She carefully punished herself over the mission all the while, to avoid thinking of anything else. How could she have forgotten about it?

Squaring up her shoulders and putting on her most neutral, diplomatic face, she braced herself mentally before leaving the closet. They would not talk about it. They had a mission to finish, and they would. One step at a time.

Han was fully dressed this time, wearing a pair of beige pants with a red sash, black boots, a short brown jacket, and a black shirt with a neckline that opened just enough to give a peek of tan, muscular skin and a sprinkling of fine hairs—

Leia blinked rapidly and forced herself to look away. Intrusive images of how intimate she’d recently been with that particular stretch of Han Solo filled her head.

‘You look—’ Han said, and Leia looked again in time to see his throat bobbing as he swallowed, ‘beautiful.’

‘Thank you. That looks—good on you,’ she said. She was feeling that uncomfortable heat again, as if someone had suddenly turned up the thermostat. Except she’d walked through this room not long ago and the temperature had felt fine. But Han must have been feeling it as well, because he was tugging at the clothes on the back of his neck.

And he had the same hungry look he’d had right before everything started.

‘Han,’ she said, a warning in her voice.

‘I can’t stop thinking about it,’ he said, taking a step forward. ‘About you. I know you’re thinking about it, too.’

The denial she had been working up to came out as a weak ‘No’ that she had trouble believing. What was the matter with her? With them? It had been good, and it had been a long time coming, but they were adults. Why couldn’t they get through a conversation without wanting to jump each other? Especially when their thirst had been sated so thoroughly, at least for the moment. Hadn’t it?

Han was coming closer now. Working her legs to take her away from him felt to Leia like a monumental job. And was it even worth doing if she didn’t really want to?

The mission. The mission for the Alliance. We got dressed. We’re supposed to go out there. Have dinner. Kiss. I want to kiss him and have him fuck me over a dinner table.

Her brain was glitching again, jolted out of the fog only when her back hit something hard and she stopped moving. Han, however did not, and the mixed fragrances of his aftershave, his skin, and their sex filled up her nose with every step closer. Her new underwear was already halfway through getting ruined. The last remnants of awareness got swallowed up by the fog in a dying protest as she reached out to grab the lapels of his jacket and pull him closer. Han was on her in an instant, his mouth crashing on hers before seeking out the most tender spots of her neck and pulling at the skin with his tongue and teeth. His hands cupped her breasts and she felt the calloused pads of his thumbs through the fabric as they rolled over her hard nipples, making her moan.

Desperately, she hooked one of her knees around his thigh, grabbed his hand and guided it through the slit of her dress.

‘Fuck, Leia, you’re so wet,’ he growled into her neck, fingers tangling with her underwear. They slid and stroked firmly along her opening, towards the sensitive crease in the back, bringing back her wetness towards her swollen clit and circling it with a thumb. One finger slipped inside, coaxing her sensitive spot again, and she gasped before taking his earlobe into his mouth.

Her back arched as her core tightened and she rode his hand towards her fast-approaching climax. She hadn’t finished getting off and she already couldn’t bear the thought of doing anything else. She was sore, her clit not having recovered from their previous rounds, but some animalistic instinct in her drove her on, making her feel that if she stopped doing this, even for a second, she would simply—

‘Ow!’

Her orgasm vanished in the air as Leia flinched, pulling her shoulder away from the hot surface behind her.

‘Sorry!’ Han grunted, taking his hand away and looking at her with concern. ‘Was that too rough or—’

‘No, no, I’m fine.’ Leia looked over her shoulder at the reddened skin, but it didn’t look serious. Then she took in the culprit and frowned. ‘The statue burnt my shoulder. Why is it hot?’

‘Space heater?’ Han asked. The bulge in his crotch was noticeable even in his loose pants, drawing Leia’s attention, but she made herself look away and back to the statue.

‘No, I was leaning against it earlier and it wasn’t hot.’ She located the spot she had touched and examined the area around it. Just behind it, a small, hidden pocket opened, a lit burner within it. There was a label below it.

Her stomach lurched, the fire in her belly going cold too fast.

‘Pheromone enhancer,’ she croaked, her mouth dry. ‘It’s a pheromone enhancer.’

‘Huh?’

Han still looked like he wanted to throw her over the sofa and fuck her rather than stand around for a chat, but he at least seemed to be processing the words. His hands twitched like he was making an effort not to put them right back to where they had just been. Leia couldn’t blame him. She felt as if she had been split in two shortly after they’d entered the suite, her two halves fighting an unequal fight to take possession of her. Now she knew why, and it was giving her the strength she needed to end this.

Filling her lungs with air had the unfortunate effect of filling her with more pheromones that made her skin tingle with warmth and her core clench again with want, but it allowed Leia to blow on the burner until the fire went out.

Han’s throat bobbed as he watched her, and he rubbed a hand down the front of his pants.

‘So that was it, then?’ he asked.

Barely hearing him, she lunged for him and undid the fly of his pants, taking out his cock and stroking him until he was grabbing her ass and lifting her up. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist as Han stumbled, and she felt her back pressed into the curve of the transparisteel window. No sooner were they stable that she felt one of his arms let go of her, pushing her dress and her underwear aside to guide his erection into her slick opening, and she cried out as he filled her. Her clit could barely withstand more friction but it didn’t really need it. He thrust into her and she rode him without even trying, her muscles clenching and pulling him deeper, and it didn’t take long for Han to cum into her. This time she looked at his face as it scrunched up and kissed every crease as they moved together.

Leia hid her face in the crook of his neck for a moment, letting him hold her close. She remembered discovering the pheromone enhancer and putting it out, remembered trying to fight against it, but being so close to it had overpowered her. It was going to take a while for the full effects to disappear, drenched in pheromones as they were, but at least it should—hopefully—dissipate enough for them to stop jumping each other like their lives depended on it.

With a wobble, Han put her down and retreated several steps as he made himself decent. Leia pulled her underwear up and let her skirts fall, trying to normalize her breath. Belatedly, she realized they hadn’t worn a condom this time. Pregnancy didn’t worry her and she trusted Han, but it had made a mess. She patted her hair, pushed some flyaways behind her ears, then wrapped her arms around herself. She was still abnormally drawn to him, noticing every single thing she found attractive as if under a magnifying glass, the urge to run back to his arms and kiss him until they forgot to breathe still present. But she was at least able to make herself look away, stop herself from acting on it. Making herself walk was slightly easier, so she went back into the closet. Another change of underwear was due. What would their tab be for all the clothes they were borrowing?

A tab. Oh, holy mother of—

Clothes were bound to be included as additionals in the bill for their hotel stay. As were condoms. And sex toys. And several things she vaguely remembered accidentally breaking.

And her ex-boyfriend was paying for it all.

Back in the main suite, she found Han activating some sort of ventilation system.

‘That kriffing droid,’ Leia growled. ‘This hotel has a lawsuit coming!’

‘I’m afraid we’re on the wrong side of the law to sue anyone, sweetheart,’ Han said, still keeping his distance, even though the black of his eyes was back to its regular size once more.

They looked at each other as the word hung in the air between them.

‘Han…’

‘This sucks, huh?’ he said, giving her the version of his crooked smile that looked a little sad, a little sheepish. She didn’t need any enhancers to admit to herself how much she liked it.

‘Not that—it—sucked,’ Han added, looking at her like he hoped she would say… say what? What could she possibly say? That it was the most physically intense sex she’d ever had and, even though her insides felt raw, she’d liked it? That the pheromones may have lowered her inhibitions and amped up her attraction to him but everything else was all her, and it had felt fucking amazing to let go for once? That she had felt happy when he’d held her afterwards? And if she said all that, then what?

‘It’s not ideal,’ she opted to say. Han snorted lightly. Understatement of the year.

‘Look, Leia, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I tried to fight against it, but I—’ He gave her a helpless look.

She shook her head. ‘If you’re to blame here, then I am, too. We were drugged, Han. It should have never happened.’

His jaw tensed. ‘Right. But it did. So what the hell do we do now?’

‘I—I don’t know,’ Leia admitted, her voice small. ‘Can we… put it on hold, for now? We’ve spent enough time here as it is. I can’t—I need to finish what we came here to do, Han.’

She expected Han to argue with her like he’d tried to do earlier, like he did every time he tried to get her to care about anything other than the rebellion, as if she could afford to, as if she wasn’t bearing the weight of a whole dead planet on her shoulders. As if she didn’t already care a dangerous amount about those other things. But he must have seen something in her eyes, because he just nodded once.

‘Does your shoulder hurt?’ he asked, his face showing genuine concern. ‘Or… anything else. There must be some bacta in here.’

‘I’ll just get a painkiller before we go. I’m okay.’

She began to turn away, intending to head back to the ‘fresher to look for a medkit and make herself as presentable as she possibly could, when he asked, ‘Are we? I mean, if we’re gonna go out there and pretend—’

‘We’re fine, Han,’ she said, her voice tight with the control she was trying hard to maintain. She needed to, for the sake of the mission. Of the rebellion. She had failed it enough as it was. She could put tonight in a box and close the lid on it until she was ready to face it, to figure it out, because right now, she had no answers. And she was scared of what would happen when she did—or when Han offered his own. 

‘It’s just sex,’ she added, more to herself than him. His brow furrowed slightly, and her hands itched to smooth it down.

‘Sure. Whatever you need it to be, Leia.’

If only it were that simple, Leia thought.

Facing the partial destruction of the suite with a fully clear head was as hard as Leia had imagined it would be, if not more. More than the material damage, she’d known that coming back would mean making good on her word and talking to Han about what had happened, and how they could move forward.

In that scenario, she was coming back here with Han. After having successfully finished their mission and on a quick stop before getting the hell out of Lanz Carpo. Not alone while Han was in the hands of a crime boss who had just sent them on a suicide mission in exchange for Han’s life. As much as Leia had hoped to delay their conversation until things had calmed down, she was beginning to wonder if there was ever going to be a good time to have it. With their track record, probably not.

She just hoped they had any time at all.

In the main room and the closet, the clothes they had tried on still littered the floor. As embarrassed as she felt, Leia was happy to let the droids deal with the mess in the morning, and she searched for the only duffel bag she and Han had brought with them. She traded her delicate dress for the one change of clothes she had—a practical shirt, jacket, and pants—then stuffed the clothes Han had come in wearing into the bag and headed to the bedroom to find hers.

The bedroom wasn’t in much better shape. The duvet was rumpled and soaked through; the carpeted floor was wet, and the door to the cabinet was pushed half-open by the stack of fluffy white towels that had fallen down.

They had really gone at it. 

Compartmentalizing had been the only way she had been able to get through their charade after they’d left earlier but, just like the honeymoon suite, everything kept pushing her and Han together, making it nearly impossible to forget that they had crossed a line that couldn’t be uncrossed. The charged way he’d looked at her when she’d pushed him against the door that would take them to the comm room, the fierceness in his voice when he called out her name and told her to run to safety, the weight of his hands on the small of her back as they’d danced to blend with the crowd. The jealousy in his eyes when she’d traded him for Dar. Han had no more right to claim her than she did him, but she’d wanted him to. She was free of the enhancer, and she still wanted him as much. Funny, how all it took was a drug-induced sex marathon to admit the truth.

It hadn’t been just sex.

Leia splashed cold water on her face, pressing the palms of her hands into her eyes. When she looked up, she caught the glimpse of something shiny and red in the mirror. Amidst knocked over shampoo bottles, the sex toy Han had used on her earlier lay abandoned; swallowing a lump in her throat, Leia got closer and picked it up. Despite the fall, it wasn’t broken, but the hotel was still going to charge them for it—and it was going to have to come from the Alliance’s funds. There was no way she’d let Dar know the full contents of her tab.

Her finger ghosted over the nozzle, the echoes of Han’s words and his touch on her skin—sometimes rough, sometimes tender, always earnest— filling her mind. The memories remained with her, whether she was entitled to them or not.

Leia straightened up, took a deep, bracing breath, and marched back into the bedroom. The toy fell on top of her folded clothes before she zipped up the bag and slung it over her shoulder.

They would get Han back, they would go against the odds, and somehow they would survive again. Everything else would have to wait just a bit longer.

It would still be there when they were ready to face it.