Chapter Text
Without the Bifrost, without magic, without a single redeeming scrap of light—falling without any of these is uncontrolled, unstoppable. He spins, he turns; he closes his eyes and presses his hands to his face. The Universe presses in against his skull, begging to be let in, its fingers tap-tap-tap at the base of his neck.
Lo-ki, I’m home!
To be home; isn’t that the most cursed wish, to say please, please let me go home. Let this trip be a loop and go back to Asgard and everything will be okay. It will be okay. It has to. Certainly it can’t get any worse.
Finally where I belong, where I belong—
But what is this, the spinning cosmos, and voices whisper in his ear things that he does not understand, and other words that he understands too well.
Traitor
TraitorLiar
TraitorLiarFatherMother
TraitorLiar nobody wants you, nobody wants you to be their king
TraitorLiar why would FatherMother accept you as their child?
TraitorLiar the monster
TraitorLiaruglyhateful—speakingcryingcringing
TraitorLiar what about your brother?
TraitorLiarlovingbrother—GoldenWarriorlovingbrother
Loki remembers thinking, That’s stupid. As much as you can say ‘that’s stupid’ when the universe itself is pulling open your head and fitting its nails in the cracks, and tentacles of thought push through the socket of your eye and surely there should be death, surely he should die from this, his brain collapsing into a black hole, marker for future civilizations, and someone whispers it doesn’t work like that and then suddenly—
Loki, no!
GoldenWarriorlovingbrother
Where I belong?
Traitorliar
And everyone lies so prettily
—suddenly the ground is here, everything is here, all of everything in the universe is here in front of his face and he tries to catch himself, he does, but his brain is already leaking across the back of his ears, the dark, goopy black thoughts still coming out of one of the Universe-holes, and he falls that last little bit, almost nothing after the huge distance that came before, and his legs give out and his head cracks a rock with a horrible thwock and ow that