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It was one of those nights where the House of Lamentation was completely silent, save for the humming coming from the fridge and AC and the faint sounds of Levi’s games.
Satan was wide awake, the quietness bothering him for a strange reason. He tried playing a little bit of ambient music on his D.D.D, but it annoyed him more than it helped him relax. He tried reading some of his books, but he couldn’t focus on the words.
Frustrated, Satan got up from his bed and paced around the little space in his bedroom before leaving the room. With no destination in mind, Satan walked up and down the house. He passed by the twins’ room—the lights were off and no sounds could be heard. He walked by Asmo’s room—the lights were off and no sounds could be heard either. He walked by Mammon’s room—the lights were off and no sounds were heard. He walked by Levi’s room—the dim lights could be seen through the crack of the door and the faint sounds of Levi’s gaming came through the door. Then Satan passed by Lucifer’s room and stopped.
Satan meant to skip Lucifer’s room altogether, but his mind took in the small details. The door to Lucifer’s room was slightly ajar. Satan could hear quiet and sad murmurs coming from Lucifer and the faint music.
Satan didn’t want to do it, but he did anyways.
Satan pulled the door enough to allow him to slip into Lucifer’s room. He saw his “perfect” oldest brother laying across his armchair with bottles of Demonus strewn across the glass table.
Lucifer didn’t even look to see who entered his room.
Satan slowly made his way to his brother until he was standing right in front of Lucifer.
Satan saw that Lucifer was staring out into space. His eyes held unmistakable sadness and tears dripped down his face.
“…Lucifer?” Satan called out quietly.
Lucifer made no sign that he had heard what Satan said nor did he show anything to let Satan know that he was aware that the fourth-born was in his room.
“Lucifer?” Satan said again, this time nudging Lucifer.
The physical contact was what made Lucifer snap back into reality.
“Huh? Satan…?” Lucifer looked around his room before locking eyes with Satan.
“What…what are you…? Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Lucifer asked quietly.
Satan only stared at Lucifer.
“N-Never mind. Do you need anything?”
Satan didn’t miss the tremor in Lucifer’s voice, nor did he forget Lucifer was still crying.
“Why are you crying?”
“Crying? Y-You must be mistaken.” Lucifer quickly wiped away his tears with his gloved hands—oh wait, his gloves weren’t on.
“Lucifer…” Satan’s voice trails off and he quickly hugs his oldest brother.
Lucifer uncertainly hugs his brother back. After all, the two of them have a rocky relationship. Physical contact never happened unless the two of them were physically fighting.
“I’m fine.” Lucifer says to reassure his brother and he breaks the hug so he can look at Satan.
Satan sat down next to Lucifer and—oh, this armchair is pretty big.
Satan debated whether or not to ask Lucifer the question that was the most likely reason as to why Satan couldn’t fall asleep. But should he really ask when his brother was obviously crying? He would never get a chance like this, though. It seemed like Lucifer’s pride was temporarily absent.
“What do you think of me?”
“What do I think of you?” Lucifer repeated, confused by the question.
“Yeah, what do you think of me? Honestly.”
“Well,” Lucifer started. “I think that you’re quite smart.”
“Personally, what do you think of me?”
“Personally? What can I say? We never got along to begin with. But from the things I’ve observed about you, you…you…” Lucifer struggles to find the right words.
“Well, one thing I can say is that in no way are you a ‘copy’ of me or my reflection. You and I are very different.” Lucifer starts up again. “I’m sorry that you’ve thought of yourself as a version of me. I’m sorry that you do everything you can to escape our brothers’ taunts on how we are similar.”
Was Satan hearing this right? Lucifer was apologizing to him? It must be the work of the alcohol.
“I…I’m proud that you…that you do your best in everything. I don’t think that it is because you want to do better than me—though if that is the case, I’m still proud of you. I’m glad that you take your studies seriously, and I know that I can rely on you if anything happens to Mammon or Levi. Your determination is also something I like. And your antics with Belphie, I look forward to them. I think that you’re level-headed as well. You have the best control over your sin, better than the rest of us. You try not to let your anger get the best of you, and I’m sorry if I provoke that. And-“Lucifer's voice caught in his throat when he saw Satan suddenly stand up.
Lucifer watched as Satan left the room at a brisk pace, and when he heard his door click shut, Lucifer fell back against his chair.
He brought another bottle of Demonus to his lips and drank out of it before setting the bottle down.
Again, Lucifer lost himself in that state of melancholy, but this time his thoughts were on Satan.
Lucifer felt dread creep into his chest.
Did he say something wrong to Satan? He was saying exactly what he thought.
And the fact Satan left without saying anything or without glancing back at all…
When Satan had entered the room, Lucifer was prepared for taunts from his brother. But when Satan spoke, Lucifer detected the worry and concern in his voice although it was only one sentence Satan spoke that was directed to how Lucifer was.
Lucifer silently wished that the fourth-born would have stayed to comfort him.
He hated how Satan had left the room abruptly.
He felt stupid for even letting himself think that out of all his brothers, Satan would be the one to comfort him.
Lucifer took another swing from his bottle of Demonus before closing his eyes to forget his stupid thoughts.
Satan, on the other hand, his thoughts were spinning.
He didn’t mean to leave the room like that, but could you blame him?
The brother he detested the most says all these positive things about him. It made Satan’s mind short-circuit, but he reveled in the feeling that Lucifer didn’t see him as a down-graded version of himself.
Laying down in his bed, Satan was able to finally fall asleep.
You would think that he’d feel even the slightest bit of guilt for leaving his brother alone to drown in his feelings of sorrow.